Off Course

By Simon Haynes

When you're on for a birdie, watch for aliens in the rough.

A 1500 word SF/comedy/golf story

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The men craned their necks to stare at the leaden sky, and their mouths fell open as a silver shape the size of a small house dropped through the clouds and landed neatly on the green, snapping the flag in two and pressing Tom's ball into the smooth turf. A rectangular crack appeared, and a section of the ship's hull folded out. The end thudded down, biting into the turf alongside the closely-cropped green.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Simon Haynes
• Release date: Nov 16, 2011
• ISBN: 9781465859570

Simon Haynes

Simon Haynes lives in Western Australia, where he divides his time between herding deadly spiders, dodging drop bears, and making up wildly inaccurate sentences like this one.By day he's an author. By night he's also an author.He loves wry, dry humour, and his hobbies include daringly inserting the letter U into words where -- in some parts of the world at least -- this simply isn't the done thing.As for his genre-spanning novels, they include epic fantasy (with robots), scifi comedy (also with robots), middle grade humour (featuring robots AND the wanton use of the letter U), as well as a series of historical mystery novels set in 1870's London. (No, of course there aren't robots in those. He's not completely out of his mind.)When he's not writing Simon is usually renovating his house, sim-racing online, using twitter (@spacejock), gardening, tweaking his book covers, pondering the meaning of the universe and reading, and if you think it's easy doing all that at the same time you should see what he can do with a mug of coffee, a banana and a large bag of salt.When he's not making outlandish claims he likes to count how many novels he's written, and how many genres he's written them in. (Lots and too many.)Finally, if you want to hear Simon reading one of his award-winning stories, you'll find an enticement to join his newsletter here: spacejock.com.au/ML.html

Book preview

Off Course

A Short Story

An alien fleet invades the wrong hole …

© Simon Haynes 2011

All Rights Reserved

Bowman Press

Bowman Press

Stock images © depositphotos.com

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Off Course

It was an overcast day, mid-week, and the golf course was almost deserted. Three elderly men had reached the seventh tee, where Jack and Rex were watching Tom, the third member of their group. He was hunched and frail, and his hands shook as he held the worn grip on his driver. He addressed the ball for a moment, then wound the club back with a