Dancing with Demons: Life with my Father

By Frank Josey

This story of one family, and one boy Frank, representing many baby boomers, is told for the first time.

War has a horrendous effect on most returned soldiers' families. The e-book, "Hidden Courage -Stories from my Father", outlines how an otherwise gentle Canadian "country boy" became a shell shock victim.

Child abuse is still a taboo subject, as evidenced by the many people and professionals who, for whatever reason, do not want to be associated with this e-book.

Originally planned to be novel length, this e-book became a short story not only because it did not want to be an uninteresting "101 abusive things my Dad did to me", but it was just too difficult for the author to re-live all the memories.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Frank Josey
• Release date: Nov 1, 2011
• ISBN: 9781465723598

Frank Josey

Apart from "The Forgotten Heroes", which was a special project for a late friend, my e-publications' main theme to November 2011 is the effects of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. This powerful mental illness wreaks havoc on our society, a society that rarely understands the impact of this condition.PTSDSadly, the overuse of PTSD diagnosis has increased confusion and cynicism. I only address PTSD where SEVERE TRAUMA was experienced (battle weary soldiers or brutally abused children).Let's stop euphemisms re most returned soldiers - THEY SUFFERED SHELL SHOCK OR BATTLE FATIGUE.My PTSD was not caused by the "Puppy Love" experience, but from a brutal terror suffered by most children of returned soldiers who experienced the horror of combat (but were never treated for its effects). Thus, the baby boomer generation families still harbour many forbidden secrets.Am I cured? In my case, the mental illness is managable, but still affects my day to day choices.Many consider me a failure, I am now living proof that there is hope for PTSD sufferers, besides the alternative - suicide. I must emphasize that a top mental health professional must treat this crippling condition.When the truth is revealed (the buried emotions rise to the surface), you will lose more "friends" than rats deserting a sinking ship. Many arrogant people have laughed at my financial and social demise (what goes around comes around).For many of us, the attempt at a cure is worse than the ailment (reliving the trauma)- but if you persist, you'll be granted a second chance. A successful man goes from failure to failure but never gives up (Winston Churchill).Self compassion, now THAT's a project PTSD sufferers can tackle. Until we forgive ourselves, we're just actors. Once we learn to truly respect and properly care for ourselves, then, and only then, can mature love for others develop.Loneliness is an ever present challenge for PTSD sufferers. Loneliness is Western Society's biggest problem, Mother Teresa once said, responding to an arrogant reporter (who expected abortion to be Mother Teresa's response). Accept the loneliness, embrace it - it'll end in greater character within.OtherI enjoy drumming as a hobby, specializing in Big Band Jazz, Heavy Metal and Parade Drumming (Bagpipe Bands).I am a Management Accountant, having graduated from Simon Fraser University Burnaby BC Canada.I am over the hill but it's better than being under it.My motto: THINGS ARE NEVER AS BAD AS THEY SEEM.

Book preview

Dancing with Demons - Life with my Father

(A Short Story)

Published by Frank Josey at Smashwords

Copyright 2011 Frank Josey

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This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to Smashwords.com and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

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Table of Contents

Dedication

Disclaimer

Introduction

The Family Secret Strikes

1309 Hamilton Street New Westminster

My Dad’s dead I cried

Conclusion

Epilogue

About the Author

Further works

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Dedication

This partial autobiography is dedicated to all those who have suffered from severe child abuse and understand the phenomenal difficulty in trying to fully and sustainably recover from its effects.

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DISCLAIMER

This story is based on the author’s factual experiences. Most names of characters have been changed to protect their identity.

The author is not a qualified mental health professional. The psychological opinions expressed in this e-book are from his experience during recovery, personal research and notes taken during appointments with his psychologist. Thus, no recommended treatments are given. The treatments that were successful for me are not recommended for everyone – a skilled psychologist or psychiatrist must be hired.

Foul language is used only in context – that is, when quoting actual statements.

The moral rights of the author have been asserted.

INTRODUCTION

Preamble

This story of one family, and one boy Frank, representing many baby boomers, is told for the first time.

War has a horrendous effect on most returned soldiers' families. The e-book, Hidden Courage - Stories from my Father, outlines how an otherwise gentle Canadian country boy became a shell shock victim.

Child abuse is still a taboo subject, as evidenced by the many people and professionals who, for whatever reason, do not want to be associated with this topic.

Originally planned to be novel length, this e-book became a short story not only because a list of 101 abusive things my Dad did to me needed to be avoided, but it was just too difficult for the author to re-live all the memories.

This is not an oh woe is me victim's testimony; this e-book attempts to awake the truth in all sufferers, and give hope! The author's Dad was a complex human being, actually a good man, who the author has not only forgiven, but wished his father was still around, now that the author has matured.

Dorothy (Dot) and Fred are Frank's parents.

Examples of actual