A Positive Plan for Creating More Calm, Less Stress

By Karol Ladd

Busy. Hurried! FRAZZLED!!! A mom's life is anything but tranquil. With multiple responsibilities as caretaker, taxi driver, short-order cook, and domestic servant, what most women need in life is more calm-and less stress!

More Calm, Less Stress provides that positive, biblically-based plan to help women realistically create an atmosphere of peace that she and her family so desperately need. The five delightful and doable action steps help mothers make their home a positive place to live.

This is the first book in the Positive Plan series that will also include:

• A Positive Plan for Creating More Fun, Less Whining (June 2006)
• A Positive Plan for Creating More Love, Less Anger (June 2007)

• Language: English
• Publisher: Thomas Nelson
• Release date: Jul 10, 2005
• ISBN: 9781418554576

Karol Ladd

Karol Ladd, a former teacher, has authored twenty-one books, including the best-selling Silver Angel Award-winning The Power of a Positive Mom. The founder and president of Positive Life Principles, Inc. and co-founder of a character-building club called USA Sonshine Girls, Karol loves sharing creative ideas for families and positive principles for life. She and her husband, Curt, have two daughters and reside in Dallas, Texas.

Book preview

Praise for

A Positive Plan for Creating

More Fun, Less Whining

This jam-packed creative manual is sizzling with ideas to keep a spark in your family time. Sweet is the sound of family laughter . . . memories last a lifetime . . . so have a plan!

Patsy Clairmont

Women of Faith speaker

Author, All Cracked Up

Karol offers fun-in-the-now by savoring each stage of your child’s life with complete and concise tips for being the encouraging, positive, and FUN mom.

Jane Jarrell Author of

The Frazzled Factor and Simple Hospitality

a

positive

plan

for creating

more fun,

less whining

KAROL LADD

PositivePlan_0003_001

A POSITIVE PLAN FOR CREATING MORE FUN, LESS WHINING

© 2006 Karol Ladd

All rights reserved. No portion of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means—electronic, mechanical, photocopy, recording, or any other—except for brief quotation in printed reviews, without the prior permission of the publisher.

Published by W Publishing Group, a division of Thomas Nelson, Inc., P.O. Box 141000, Nashville, TN 37214.

All Scripture quotations, unless otherwise indicated, are taken from the Holy Bible, New International Version®. Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society. Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved. Scriptures marked NLT are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation®. Copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved. Scriptures marked AMP are taken from the Amplified Bible, New Testament. Copyright © 1954, 1958, 1962, 1964, 1965, 1987 by The Lockman Foundation. Used by permission. All rights reserved. Scriptures marked NASB are taken from the New American Standard Bible®. Copyright © 1960, 1962, 1963, 1968, 1971, 1972, 1973, 1975, 1977, 1995 by The Lockman Foundation. Used by permission. Scriptures marked TLB are taken from The Living Bible. Copyright © 1971. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved. Scriptures marked NKJV are taken from the New King James Version®. Copyright © 1982 by Thomas Nelson, Inc. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

Cover design: Brand Navigation

Interior design: Stacy Clark

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

Ladd, Karol.

  A positive plan for creating more fun, less whining / Karol Ladd.

   p. cm.

Includes bibliographical references.

  ISBN 0-8499-0711-X

  1. Family—Religious life. 2. Family recreation. I. Title.

  BV4526.3.L33 2006

  649'.5—dc22

2006005739

Printed in the United States of America

06 07 08 09 10 RRD 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1

A good laugh is sunshine in a house.

WILLIAM MAKEPEACE THACKERAY

A special thanks to my precious friends who

sprinkled fun ideas throughout this book: Beth R.,

Leslie H., Leslie C., Amy R., Karen S., Karen M.,

Beth D., Caroline B., Carol F., Leslie W., Liz T.,

Becky J., Jane J., and LaVerne D.

Contents

Introduction:

Pure and Simple Fun

1. Laughter: The Perfect Glue for Family Bonding

2. How to Raise a Whiner

Step One:

Adopt a New Attitude

3. Being Fun

4. Creative Ideas for Every Season

5. Boredom Busters

6. Stuff to Have on Hand for Quick and Easy Fun

Step Two:

Enjoy Family Time

7. Terrific Travel Tips

8. Keeping Your Sanity While Shopping

9. Five Ingredients for Enjoying a Delightful Meal

10. Reaching Out in Compassion

Step Three:

Build Fond Memories

11. Grab a Theme and Run with It

12. How to Throw a Brilliant Birthday Bash

13. Every Occasion Can Be a Great Occasion

Step Four:

Welcome Friends and Family

14. Outdoor Games and Adventures

15. A Simple Guide to Indoor Fun

16. Survival Tips for Sleepovers and Slumber Parties

Conclusion:

Serendipity

Books and Resources

Notes

introduction

Pure and Simple Fun

There ain’t much fun in medicine, but there’s a good deal of medicine in fun.

JOSH BILLINGS

He who has a glad heart has a continual feast.

PROVERBS 15:15 AMP

Do the words I’m bored strike a chord of fear and anxiety in your spirit?

Does your stress level rise when you hear a question like, Can Steve and Tommy spend the night tonight?

Is there tension in your neck and shoulders when one of the kids begins to whine, This isn’t fun! Can’t we do something else?

Breathe a sigh of relief; help is here.

Every person who has kids or works with kids knows the benefit of having a few fresh ideas to create more fun and less whining. Whether you are a parent, grandparent, teacher, youth worker, vacation Bible school volunteer, aunt, uncle, or neighbor, I’m guessing you would prefer to enjoy the kids around you rather than being annoyed by them. Consider this book an essential resource to keep on hand whenever those precious charges are in your care. Within the pages of this book, you will find activities for any time, any place, any occasion, and kids of any age.

Recently an elderly friend asked me, So, Karol, what is your latest project? I told him the name of this book, and a big smile broke across his face as he glanced at the grandchild he had cared for during the weekend. Hurry up and write that one! he said with a slight tone of desperation.

Even the best of kids have their trying moments. I want to equip you with fun artillery so you will be ready just in case grumbling or whining should erupt. I also want to help you get to the root of whining and plant contentment and gratitude in its place.

Fun in the Making

Fun is an important element of a child’s life, yet in our hurry-up, gotta-go society we rarely seem to fit it into the schedule. Certainly, there are times when amusing moments just seem to surface out of nowhere; but for the most part, fun must be deliberately planned. I would like to offer you a positive and practical plan for creating fun and building delightful memories!

We will begin by adopting a new attitude toward fun. I want to show you simple and innovative ways to create an atmosphere that welcomes delight into your home. Next, we’ll move into fresh ideas for enjoying family moments together. We will cover terrific travel tips, dinnertime delights, sanity-saving shopping tips, and beautiful ways to reach out in compassion together outside the walls of our home. The third section of the book deals specifically with creative and unique ways to build fond memories for our kids. Most of us want our kids to reflect on their childhood memories in a positive way, so in this section we will explore ways to enhance birthday celebrations as well as ways to make the most of special themes and significant occasions.

Finally, fun happens with friends, so I’ve devoted an entire section to creatively welcoming and enjoying friends and extended family members. You will find imaginative ideas for outdoor adventures as well as indoor ingenuity. And, of course, the book wouldn’t be complete if I didn’t offer survival tips for those times when the kids have friends visiting for a sleepover. Trust me, you will make it through with flying colors.

You may be wondering where I got all of the ideas for this book. Some of the ideas come from my own experiences as a camp counselor and as a teacher. I was trained in the trenches in how to rescue kids from boredom and create an experience that is meaningful and fun. I’m also a mom, so I’ve tested many of the parties, crafts, and games on my own family throughout the years. You will see that I’ve also included ideas from a tremendous repertoire of resources. In fact, you will find a list of some of my favorite resources at the end of the book. One of the best resources was my friends, who will share with you in this book their own fun activities they have experienced with their families.

Stop Whining

Perhaps you read the title of this book and thought that you could use a little less whining around the house. Now, I’m not sure if you are talking about your kids’ whining or your own whining. Either way, as you increase the opportunities for smiles in your home, your kids will whine a little less often, and you will find yourself uplifted as well. Fun can’t get rid of all the whining, but it can make a huge dent in it. Whining is also a heart issue, so we will get to the nitty-gritty of whining in chapter 2. (You may want to turn straight there if this is an emergency.)

It is my hope that by giving you the ideas in this book, I will be giving you a gift, a gift of joy. When my kids grow up, I want them to look back at their childhood years with fond memories. I’m sure you feel that way too. An overabundance of grumbling and complaining would tend to muddy those wonderful memories. At the end of each chapter, you will find a wonderful way to encourage your kids’ hearts and spiritual wisdom through a family devotional.

All in all, A Positive Plan for Creating More Fun, Less Whining is a reference book to help you create great memories. Keep it handy for when the entire neighborhood descends on your backyard or when you are planning that next vacation or putting together another birthday party. Fun doesn’t have to be difficult or costly. It begins with a willing heart and develops through a positive plan. Even the most uncreative, unresourceful type of person can do it. Making wonderful memories is easier than you think!

1

Laughter: The Perfect Glue

for Family Bonding

Genuine laughing is the vent of the soul, the nostrils of the heart, and it is just as necessary for health and happiness as spring water is for a trout.

JOSH BILLINGS

A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.

PROVERBS 17:22

When is the last time you had a good, hearty laugh? Really, honestly, take a moment to think about it. Hopefully you don’t have to think back too far. Sometimes just the memory of a gut-wrenching guffaw starts me laughing all over again. (I had to stop writing several times during this paragraph just to regain my composure.)

Without a doubt, a good dose of humor levels some of the bumps in life and lightens the load of our day-to-day routine. Victor Hugo said, Laughter is the sun that drives winter from the human face.¹ I’d add that laughter is the sunshine that melts the winter frost that sometimes settles on human relationships.

We need to laugh more often with family and friends. Not only is it good for our health; it’s good for our life. Perhaps you are thinking, But I don’t feel like laughing. My life is the pits right now. I want to invite you to take a short mental vacation from the pit you are in and travel to a place of heartfelt joy. You will find that as you fill your heart and mind with cheer, your perspective may change on the challenges you face.

Now, I don’t want to gloss over the fact that there are times in our lives when we must grieve and cry. As Solomon said, There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven . . . a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance (Ecclesiastes 3:1, 4). Realistically, there are certain times in all of our lives when we must work through the pain of loss or hurt or grief. Please don’t get me wrong. I’m not diminishing the importance of those times, but I am saying that there are many opportunities for delight and laughter as well. And sometimes humor may be the God-given salve that helps soothe the hurt and heal the pain.

Superglue

Humor can be sticky. By that, I mean that laughing together can bring family members closer and create a unique bonding by smoothing over some of the prickly edges. In his book The Laughter Prescription, Dr. Laurence Peter says humor serves an important role in easing tensions, both in the individual and in relationships with others. Laughter provides the outlet for otherwise unacceptable feelings, behaviors and impulses by facilitating talking about or acting out conflicts and emotions in a safe, nonthreatening way.²

My dear friend Beth, mother of four, can attest to the blessing of laughter. When her youngest son was a curious toddler, he happened to find several paint bottles on the kitchen table. Being the industrious toddler that he was, he wanted to paint with his newfound treasure. Unfortunately, there were no paintbrushes to help him out; but who needs paintbrushes when you have open bottles of paint? Little Kyle took a bottle in each hand. While holding them upside down, he walked through the beautifully carpeted family room, then the dining room, and was about to enter the kitchen when he met up with Beth.

She will never forget this poignant moment of decision. Here she stood, looking at her proud toddler with nearly empty paint bottles and her newly decorated carpet. At this point she could have screamed bloody murder or she could have stayed quiet, calm, cool, and collected. Neither of these options worked for her. Instead, she began to laugh hysterically. The humor of the moment had hit her like a wave of cool, fresh water. She knew her son had not done this out of direct disobedience or defiance. It was simply childhood foolishness. Yes, he needed to learn not to do it again, and that would come in a moment.

Wise Beth chose to make this a fond family memory. You can be sure that either way it would have been a memory, but Beth chose a fond memory through laughter instead of a horrible memory through screaming. She gathered the family together for a good laugh. They took pictures, and then they all worked together to clean up the mess. The sibling who left the paint bottles out had double duty, I’m sure. Kyle’s paint incident happened almost twenty years ago, but the family still laughs about it to this day— thanks to Beth’s ability to see the lighter side of life.

Certainly we can’t laugh at every wrong thing our kids do. We shouldn’t make them think that it’s OK or funny to make a mess or act irresponsibly. Handle laughter with wisdom, but don’t miss opportunities to allow laughter to build your family memories and bond you in the process.

The Laugh Cure

Humor helps keep family challenges and unforeseen circumstances in perspective, and it can prevent our stress levels from rising out of control. Yes, humor can have a healing effect both emotionally and physically. A number of years ago, Norman Cousins, the famous editor of the Saturday Review, was told he had a severe case of an incurable, progressive, connective tissue disease. He decided that instead of sitting around and allowing the pain to take over, he would become proactive in his healthcare management and especially in his attitude. One of the things he decided to do was to obtain copies of old television shows and movies he had always enjoyed, such as Candid Camera and Marx Brothers films. He also decided to read humorous books. He reported that ten minutes of genuine belly laughter would relieve his intense pain for hours.

While Norman was in the hospital,