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Rampant
Rampant
Rampant
Ebook417 pages6 hours

Rampant

Rating: 3.5 out of 5 stars

3.5/5

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Forget everything you ever knew about unicorns. The fluffy, sparkly, friendly “horses” so popular the world over don’t exist. Real unicorns are killers.

Beasts the size of elephants, with cloven hooves that shake the earth, hides impervious to bullets, and horns that contain a deadly poison, unicorns can outrun a sports car and smell a human from a mile away.

And they can only be killed by virgin warriors descended from Alexander the Great.

Sixteen-year-old Astrid Llewelyn has grown up with her mom Lilith’s tall tales about unicorns and their exalted family heritage, but figures her mom’s crazy. But the scary stories her mom told her about the monsters in her formative years left her with a firm phobia about unicorns, even the cutesy kind popular with young girls.

But when one of the monsters attacks her boyfriend in the woods—thereby ruining any chance of him taking her to prom—Astrid finds herself headed to Rome to train as a unicorn hunter.

“As swift and sure-footed as a killer unicorn, Rampant weaves a vibrant new mythology from venerable threads.”—Scott Westerfeld, bestselling author of the Uglies series

LanguageEnglish
PublisherHarperTeen
Release dateAug 25, 2009
ISBN9780061861475
Rampant
Author

Diana Peterfreund

Diana Peterfreund is the author of many books for adults and children, including the critically acclaimed For Darkness Shows the Stars and Across a Star-Swept Sea. She lives with her family outside Washington, DC, in a house full of bookshelves, and is always on the lookout for lost cities or stray rocket ships.

Read more from Diana Peterfreund

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Reviews for Rampant

Rating: 3.7140350582456145 out of 5 stars
3.5/5

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  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    First thing I thought when I picked up this book was seriously a book on killer unicorns what has this world come to? But it was something like a children's story on rainbows an such, but I was happily proven wrong. It got me hooked on the first chapter. I felt as if I were the characters going through seemingly impossible times. I love the main character Astrid, though she was given many opportunities to have a way out of this lifestyle she decided to stick it out.
  • Rating: 3 out of 5 stars
    3/5
    Enjoyed the twist on the fluffybunny unicorns. There were some genuinely hilarious, laugh-out-loud moments, but the "Slayer" attitude seemed ripped from Buffy- Teen who turns out to have amazing, heretofore unknown powers must be bullied, badgered, and dragged kicking and screaming into her "Destiny." They even have a "Watcher"-type who could have been played by Alexis Denisof channeling a pre-Shanshu Wesley...
  • Rating: 3 out of 5 stars
    3/5
    Basically: teenage girls with superpowers fight killer unicorns in modern day Rome. In the world of Rampant unicorns are not the fluffy, benevolent creatures of children's cartoons, but blood-thirsty, man-eating monsters from the ancient world that were driven to extinction by a secret order of nuns called the Order of the Lioness, hundreds of years ago. Of course, they're not really extinct and when they start to re-emerge the Order has to be reborn - the only catch being that only virgin female descendants of Alexander the Great have the abilities to qualify for unicorn killing - basically these girls have just enough super powers to be able to stand a chance against these near-immortal killing machines. The story is told from the point of view of Astrid, a teenage American, who finds out that she is one of the descendants of Alexander and is sent to Rome to the ancient Cloisters which the Order of the Lioness used in medieval times. There she is joined by her cousin and a handful of other girls, who need to learn how to use their unicorn killing powers before it's too late.I thought it was interesting how the author incorporated myth and history into her tale of killer unicorns. She weaves a tale of the vestal virgins in Rome, the priestesses of Diana, Goddess of the Hunt, and the story of Alexander the Great and his fearsome warhorse, Bucephalus (in the world of Rampant a mighty elephant-sized and intelligent unicorn.) Peterfreund does a good job including unicorn lore (the power of virgins to subdue unicorns, the healing powers of the alicorn) and subverting it. She even gets around the fact that Asian cultures considered their ferocious looking unicorns benevolent by stating that they had to say things like that to placate the monsters. This surprising new twist on the unicorn makes for an exciting adventure. Think Buffy the Unicorn Slayer. If you can't imagine how anything as sweet as a unicorn could be a monster - well, read this book. Peterfreund does an amazing job with some of the descriptions and action scenes - these unicorns give me the chills! Rampant is an entertaining adventure, but it does have some flaws. For the first half of the book Astrid, our main character, hates, hates, hates being a unicorn hunter. She hates everything about it and her negativity started to wear on me. The pacing was quite slow for the first bit, too and dragged even more due to the lack of enthusiasm from the protagonist. Thankfully, things really pick up in the second half and pages 200 - 400 flew by. I think that Peterfreund could have added more detail to the world building and descriptions. I never really felt like I was immersed in ancient buildings or the streets of Rome. I thought that the parts where she wove myth and legend into her story were really neat, and I wanted to see more of that - she does not provide a lot of detail. Astrid and her cousin are pretty well rounded characters, but none of the other girls receive much attention and it's really hard to remember who's who - they are basically just a handful of names, and sometimes they speak with an accent so you remember so-and-so is supposed to be German, or whatever. Astrid's mother is painfully one-dimensional, the sort of unrealistic crazy villain parent that seems to be a staple of the YA genre and the story's other main (human) antagonist is equally unconvincing.But, flaws and all, it is a fun read and if I were still a teenager I would probably be ecstatic about it. Recommended to teens and Buffy fans.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    I figured out from trial and error that attempting to describe the plot of this book ends up making me feel like I should be in a straitjacket. It certainly is a bit bizarre from an outside perspective: Virgin female descendants of Alexander the Great are called upon to defend the world from flesh-eating unicorns once thought to be extinct. But I promise it is not as ridiculous as this short plot summation. It isn't ridiculous at all. In fact, there is an epigraph noting that all of the unicorns depicted are real and are based on histories and religious texts of Europe and Asia. I found that Nancy Hathaway's "Unicorn" to be an invaluable reference tool while reading this book. There were illustrations of the different types of unicorns, such as the zhi and the kirin, as well as Alexander's karkadann Bucephalus, and reprints of artwork mentioned in "Rampant."While it was hard to look my unicorn pillow pet in its fuzzy face while reading this book, the story still made this magical/glittery-unicorn lover into a believer. There were moments when I felt the plot was dragging its cloven hooves, but in the end I appreciated all of the slower expositional moments because it made the characters that much more believable.My first foray into the this world of killer unicorns was Diana Peterfreund's contribution to "Zombies vs. Unicorns", "The Proper Care and Feeding of Your Baby Killer Unicorn," which was by far the standout of the collection. It broke my heart in all sorts of ways. When I first heard about Peterfreund's series, I was iffy about giving myself over into a world where unicorns might as well be werewolves. But there is a lot of social and moral commentary by the characters on whether children hunting these beasts was right or humane, especially because they had to retain virginity to remain warriors. I appreciated that the characters were as skeptical as I was, and I adored the opinionated Phil who kept pushing for alternatives.But, like Astrid, narrator and reluctant heroine, I found myself adapting to the situation. Unicorns are real. And they gonna eat you.
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    Teen fiction. Action/adventure. One of those "can't put it down" reads. If you liked Suzanne Collins' Hunger Games, you'll love this.
  • Rating: 3 out of 5 stars
    3/5
    You can see this review and more like it on my blog - Written Permission

    Can we talk about the cover for a second? This is a book about killer unicorns, right? So shouldn't the cover be dominated by killer unicorns, instead of the generic young woman, the shiny sword, and if you look closely, a teeny tiny little unicorn that may or may not be killer? Young adult covers these days. If I had seen this book in a bookstore, I would not have been drawn to the cover at all. I saw it on Goodreads on a list, and I thought I would check it out.

    Rampant was a typical young-adult novel. The idea of killer unicorns was really excellent in theory, but it lacked in execution. The world-building is lacking, the history of the unicorns and the cloisters and the hunters before Astrid's group is lacking. There was a lot of "We can't find records for that" or "We don't know why" and it was just really weak. Without that plot element to infuse new life into the standard "destiny/romance" plot, it was really just like every other young-adult novel out there.

    Astrid is angsty. She is shallow. Though I will say it is refreshing to see a teenager acting selfishly and not just accepting her fate and destiny with open arms. Phil was a little too uneven for my tastes. And I felt like the rest of the characters were not very well-developed at all.

    Also, we have hunters from all over the world, and they all conveniently speak English. This was frustrating to me. Does anyone else remember Buffy, in the final season when they had the Chinese slayer potential? It made it seem more real because there was a language barrier, just like there would be in real life. I know it translates easier to television than it does to print, but I would have liked to see at least one of the hunters have a language problem.

    For a book about killer unicorns, Rampant is light on the killer unicorns. It is also light on the training of the hunters. Most of it revolves around the romance aspect. Or the lack of romance, since dating is not allowed.

    The plot moved slowly and raised a lot of questions I would like to see answered, but there was no indication of it near the end of the book. The third book in the trilogy hasn't even been picked up for publication yet, which says something to me.

    Bottom Line: An average young adult novel. Nothing new, nothing exciting. I might pick up the second book, but I am in no rush.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    It’s official. The young adult paranormal genre has officially covered every supernatural thing imaginable. And made it angsty. Today? Unicorns.The cool thing about Rampant was that although it featured a somewhat-whiny heroine, it didn’t take itself too seriously. It made fun of the frolicking, rainbow-barfing unicorn stereotype. And it turned that stereotype on its head.Rampant features an astounding amount of information on unicorn history. I was pleasantly surprised to find that almost everything you needed to know about unicorns and their role in the past was covered. And it was covered well. I’m not sure if Diana Peterfreund made the lore up or found it somewhere, but it was pretty darn cool.The only thing I found lacking was character development. At the end of the book, I felt that I only really knew Astrid (the main character), Phillipa (Astrid’s cousin) and a little bit of Cory (the know-it-all girl who brought the group of unicorn hunters together). The other six or so girls? Not so much. I want to know more about the minor characters! Make me love them!Overall, though, Rampant was pretty darn fun. I loved the unicorns, I loved Astrid’s kick-ass-ness when she gets into hunter mode, and I loved the hints of romance throughout the book.Things I learned from Rampant: If you are a girl and in Rome, look out for boys who have been paid to steal your virginity; if your mom seems kind of crazy to you, she probably is, even if her ramblings about killer unicorns happen to be true; if someone tells you to stay in the car, STAY IN THE FREAKING CAR.(Originally posted to 365 Days of Reading)
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    Imagine a world where unicorns are not only real, but the antithesis of the cuddly, soul saving, pointy-horned creatures fantastical literature has made them out to be. Usually, when I give the basic premise of the series to my fellow readers, I get a raised eyebrow and a skeptical expression. To which I always answer, “Just trust me, you’ll love it.” And thus far, I’m pleased to report that has, overwhelmingly, been the case.

    Astrid just wants to be a regular teenage girl, but her mother, a descendent of Alexander the Great, knows Astrid’s destiny is far superior to ordinary high school life – she’s one of the few who can protect the world from the five races or unicorns who seek to destroy humanity. So Astrid is shipped off to a ramshackle training facility in the heart of Rome to begin her education in world saving. But fewer and fewer young women can join her in her quest against the unicorns as there is a clause in the world saving rules that keeps many eligible youngsters from being able to fulfill their noble destiny: they have to be virgins. And someone, out in the world, outside of their cloistered training ground (or possibly within it), is trying to make sure that the number of unicorn killers is kept to a minimum by taking advantage of this clause. Astrid must decide if she truly wants the life of a unicorn killer and if she’s willing to give up a budding romance with a delicious Italian in order to fulfil her destiny.

    I know, that’s full of clichés about a teenage girl finding herself. It is Diana Peterfreund’s prose that makes the story impossible to let go of and ridiculously hard to put down. Astrid’s voice is firm and clear, she’s her own person and her character development is flawless. Like Amy before her, Astrid is an inspiration and role model for those looking to stand on their own two feet and fight for themselves.
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    loved this book even though the second book sucks.
  • Rating: 3 out of 5 stars
    3/5
    I have been wanting to read Rampant since it came out, but for some strange reason I couldn’t find it anywhere. I looked everywhere and finally last year I found it while I was in the middle of the longest reading slump I have ever had to deal with. When I finally started reading again, it was one of the first books I picked up. I am so happy I finally read it.I really enjoyed this book and considering my reading is a bit slow right now, I flew through this. I didn’t want to put it down. My only complaints are that I had trouble keeping most of the characters straight. They just aren’t developed enough for me. I hated Cory. I don’t care what you’ve been through, there is no need to be that cruel. Also Lilith is the worst mom.Other than those things, I thoroughly enjoyed this book, and can not wait to get started on book two, Ascendant.
  • Rating: 3 out of 5 stars
    3/5
    Unicorns are not the light happy creatures we think they are, they are dangerous man eating beasts and after 150 years of supposed extinction they have suddenly reappeared in the world. Only virgins descended from Alexander the Great can hunt unicorns but very few people remember this, but Astrid's mother does and she is shipping Astrid off to Unicorn hunter training camp.
    At first I couldn't get into this book because I was so incredibly turned off by what happened to Astrid with Brandt and Kaitlyn. However once Astrid got to Rome and Phil showed up I was entranced. I loved watching Astrid develop as a person and Phil was a ray of sunshine in amid a bunch of heavy, troubled characters. For me Phil was what this book needed to keep from getting too dark and it is a very dark book. But Phil wasn't all light and sunshine, she had darkness too keeping her from being the obnoxious peppy character.
    Trying to avoid spoilers so I am going to be as general as possible there was one issue regarding sex and rape that I wish had been clarified by the author. This is a book for teens and I felt the author should have clarified that the second someone says no, it is rape. While she did do a good job handling the mixed feelings that people experience, there should have been a more solid clarification that it wasn't that certain characters felt it was rape and others didn't. As soon as the character said no, it was date rape.

    I feel this story could end here and doesn't really need any sequels since all of the major villains appear to be vanquished and the only real loose ends involve a minor character I wasn't really thrilled with to begin with. However I am extremely curious about where the story is going to go since it is clearly being labeled as a series.
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    Ok, can i just say right now that my creative writing class has one big inside joke about unicorns??? Namely Charlie the unicorn.. but.. still... so i'm someone who likes a good humorous unicorn story.
    Or.. you know... KILLER unicorns. They're good too.
    So i have to say i was definitely not really expecting how this books played out. I was actually expecting a fantasy, you know, with a whole world and some magic n' stuff. (because books are awesome when they have magic n' stuff) But this was and urban fantasy, so it was set in our world.
    With that said... I go to Rome? Fight Unicorns? Yes?

    The story was very impressive. The unicorns (while hard to picture... because i mean... fangs? How does that work in a horse-like mouth??) were awesome. Bonegrinder, the 'domesticated' zhi ( a small unicorn about the size of a goat) was my favourite.
    I think there are 4 types of unicorns in the story, each building in size till the last (which i'm not attempting to spell... and the book got taken back to the library so i can't look it up *sad face* ) which is about the size of an elephant.
    In the story, Astrid, a direct descendant of Alexander the Great (who apparently, did NOT ride an elephant. It was a unicorn. Now you know...) is sent to Rome by her mother after a zhi attacks her boyfriend.
    When she gets there, she's joined by Cory, Phil (Astrid's cousin), Grace, Zelda, Valjira, Mellisende, Ursala.... and one other girl who's name i can't recall how to spell... The eight girls are then trained to became UNICORN HUNTERS.
    Along the way Astrid meets Giovanni, an attractive boy visiting Italy, who could jeopardize the entire thing (cause... you know.... unicorns dig virginity...)
    An excellent read by far. Origional story, excellent characters. Just very very very good in general. I can't wait for the next one.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    Killer unicorns. Virgin hunters. What's not to love?
  • Rating: 3 out of 5 stars
    3/5
    Great story, fantastic premise. It really got going at the end, and I had a hard time putting it down. The whole alternate mythology of the unicorns was very well done - I found myself wondering if I'd be laughing at images of killer unicorns, but Peterfreund really makes them frightening and horrible creatures (even little Bonegrinder).

    There were a couple of things that bothered me, though. I'm older than the target audience, so that may have something to do with it, but I thought the whole virginity thing could get a bit preachy. If you look more closely at the whole "hunters must be virgins" thing, and the powers that hunters have, it has some interesting implications. We see what happens to girls who aren't hunters: vulnerable to attack, lessened physical abilities, etc. So, (and perhaps I'm looking too far into this, but I can't help but look for this kind of stuff) as soon as you lose your virginity, you lose your strength and power as a woman. You can no longer fight for yourself. Hunters (virgins) do not need men, do not need to be protected.

    Then there was Astrid's character. She was a bit too wishy-washy for me. One minute she's on the phone begging her mom to let her come home, even willing to sleep with a guy she barely knows to get out of her "duty" (another interesting facet of the virginity thing) whereas two months ago she had zero intention of going all the way. And then all of the sudden, she's off enjoying the rush she gets with hunting.

    Now what I had some serious issues with was her mother. At the beginning, yeah she's a bit kooky, but then again it turns out all her stories about unicorns are true. Okay, that's fine. When she doesn't let Astrid come home, it's a bit mean, but she's a mother living vicariously through her daughter. Happens all the time. Doesn't make it right, but not uncommon. And then, she comes to be the temporary donna while Neil is away. And we discover that she is, apparently, absolutely psycho. Sure, you can be a bit more rigorous in the training. But having no problems with the other girls dying so Astrid (aka she herself) can get the glory? Mocking Phil, her own niece, being downright cruel, and TORTURING her own daughter to get a promise out of her???? Really?? This lady has some serious mental health issues! And even that doesn't tip Astrid off. On the next page, she's defending her by saying that they've become better hunters since Lilith became the donna (hmm, her name is Lilith as well. How interesting). And then we're supposed to be ok with all of it because she grieves when she thinks Astrid is dead. I mean, yes, she's your mother, but after what she did, you should probably disown her and stay as far away from her as you can.

    Ok, I'm done with my rantings. It would have been 4 stars if it weren't for these problems with characterization, etc. It had a great story, turned out not to be as predictable as I thought it would be, and really drew me in. A great twist on a myth, that, for the most part, was executed very well. It ended a bit abruptly with some loose ends, which I think points to a sequel. I may not go rushing out to get it, but I'll absolutely read it.
  • Rating: 3 out of 5 stars
    3/5
    Astrid has never believed her mother's stories, that they come from a long line of unicorn hunters. At least not until a unicorn attacks her boyfriend, and the Reemergence begins. Now Astrid must travel to Italy and join other virgin descendants of Alexander The Great who are the only ones capable of becoming unicorn hunters.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    I loved the premise of this book (killer unicorns and unicorn hunters) but found the story to be uneven and ambiguous ...were the unicorns really evil, some of them? The presence of the house Zhi made it problematic for me and I found the scenes where she is hurt or tortured to be difficult to read. It made many of the characters difficult to like and root for. Also, Astrid's mother was downright cruel and creepy. There was nothing likeable about her. When she wasn't being controlling and bossy she was overly dramatic, pathetic and immature. I had no sympathy for her at all and the whole section of her coming to Italy fell flat and ended strangely for me. Those problems aside, I liked the idea of different kinds of unicorns of varying sizes and characteristics. I feel like it could've been a much better book with a better editor.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    This is a story about poisonous killer unicorns, and the virgin unicorn hunters who protect the human race from these monsters. If that's not enough hook to get you curious, I'm not sure you and I have even remotely the same taste so you're probably wasting your time reading a review from me. This unusual concept brings you into a fairly typical young adult reluctant-hero narrative, something along the lines of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, only it's Astrid the Unicorn Hunter, whose mother is thrilled when a supposedly extinct unicorn shows up and gores Astrid's boyfriend, because she just knew her little girl had a destiny. I enjoyed it, but I'm going to warn you right now that the series should be rated the same as Buffy: there's plenty of monster hunting violence as one would expect, but also much more intimate violence. No graphic glorifying descriptions and I don't think the treatment is awful, but I'm kind of sick of rape in half the fantasy I read, so consider yourself warned.Overall, I didn't love this the way I loved "For the Darkness Shows the Stars" which is the novel that introduced me to author Diana Peterfreund, but "Rampant" was probably good enough for me to give the others in the series a try.
  • Rating: 3 out of 5 stars
    3/5
    Just did not live up to my expectations. I could buy the killer unicorn parts, but had trouble with the "realistic" characters. The mother was really creepy and the teens just did not seem right.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    My first foray into reading something based on a theme - Unicorns vs. Zombies. It wasn't a completely random first choice but it was initially based on theme rather than the individual book. i felt like I was taking a little more of a chance. It worked out fine this time. This was really exciting. The battle scenes were intense. The romance was in context and necessary. I liked the characters. I'm quite sure I'll be reading the sequel within the next couple weeks.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    “Real unicorns are venomous, man-eating monsters with huge fangs and razor-sharp horns. Fortunately, they’ve been extinct for a hundred and fifty years.Or not.”When I saw “Killer Unicorns” I thought, “This is the book for me.” I’ve always liked books that completely pervert fairytales because fairytales are misogynistic and promote child abuse.This is a young adult book, surprisingly it doesn’t have a lot of teenager angst. Astrid talks about her crazy mother and then realizes that her mother’s not so crazy, mainly because she sees a Unicorn, and it attacks her boyfriend. He then dumps her and she heads to Rome to be trained to hunt unicorns, because her life is ruined and she might as well enter a convent.It’s a lot for a teenage girl to handle it, Astrid manages, finding strength she didn’t know she had and help from a very unexpected source. And danger from someone she and the other hunters thought they could trust. Overall I enjoyed this book and have already started on book 2.While this is billed as young adult, it does deal with some adult issues, one in particular is very serious and can be disturbing, it is something very common with teenage girls unfortunately and one that I saw coming. I would not recommend this for very young teenagers.
  • Rating: 2 out of 5 stars
    2/5
    It took me a bit to get into it, honestly. It's been really well reviewed by a lot of my favorite authors, and the concept -- killer unicorns! -- sounded fantastic. I was definitely intrigued.

    But it was surprisingly difficult to immerse into. I can't point to any one thing -- Peterfreund writes well enough. She moves the plot along quickly enough. Her character (Astrid) is relatable, though Astrid's mother is never, at any time, even remotely sympathetic.

    Seriously, I couldn't understand why Astrid showed any affection for the woman. I get the whole, "She's my mother," thing, I really do. I just don't get loving a mother who doesn't act like a mom, who shows no real love or concern for her daughter as a person. Maybe I was just really lucky in my draw as a mother, so I don't understand and I'll never have to, but I simply do not understand Astrid's motivation or affection toward her mother. Every time they interacted, I was pulled out of the story and sat there shaking my head going, "Why? Why does Astrid seem to care about her? WTF?"

    Anyway, other than that, the big WTF for me was the whole magic thing. It was irritating -- normally, urban fantasy asks us to accept that magic and real life exist side by side, or on top of each other, but rarely to never intersect in obvious ways. In Rampant, Astrid's introduced to the reality that unicorns are real and are, indeed, killer monsters when her boyfriend gets gored by one. This is all part of the re-emergence. Astrid is then carted off to Rome, where she begins training as a unicorn hunter. She spends a lot of her time in Rome raising a lot of really good questions, mostly boiled down to, "Why does it have to be magic? Why can't it be scientifically explained?"

    Near the end of the book, she meets somebody who basically convinces her to give up all these questions and just accept it. I just wanted to scream. I especially felt this attitude applied to the virgin thing -- I felt like they were willing to take a "science" attitude toward things like bloodlines, alicorn venom, unicorn mating and herding habits, hunting abilities, etc. etc. But especially near the end of the book, I had the definite impression that hunter = virginity. The End. No more questions. It pissed me off.

    BTW, I was intrigued by how sex was handled in the book -- the implications of using sex to avoid duty, the confusion over the social and personal definition of rape, and the various reactions of friends and family to rape. It was an interesting look at something that has been made such a religious and political issue that it's almost impossible for a woman to make the decision to lose her virginity on her own terms without weighing the social and often religious consequences.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    My mom collected unicorns when I was a child. They have always held a certain level of fascination for me because of that. This book turns my understanding of unicorns as a potentially extinct and or mythical creature completely on its head. The premise of this book is that unicorns were real and they were not fluffy sparkly or in anyway the thing of childhood dreams. Unicorns are nightmarish. They attack people and gore them to death with their horns which are covered in poison. The only people that can hunt unicorns are the virgin daughters of alexander the great. Luckily they were hunted to extinction, all 5 species. Astrid's mother believes in the mythical killer unicorns and it has cost her everything. Though Astrid doesn't believe she doesn't hold countenance with the fluffy sparkly variety. One night while babysitting Astrid's boyfriend comes over and he has one thing on his mind. Things begin moving in that direction when Astrid feels as though she is being watched and then she spots a unicorn and before she can stop it her boyfriend has been poisoned by the unicorns horn. In this one moment on this night everything changes for Astrid the nightmare of her childhood becomes reality and Astrid must become a unicorn hunter and essentialy become a nun. Not exactly the dream of every seventeen year old.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    I must confess, first of all, to having been one of the children that Astrid could never understand; I loved unicorns and owned several My Little Ponies with magic horns. Honestly, I still like the idea of them, although in my world, they certainly are not man-eating monsters. Despite my childish love of pretty, shiny, friendly unicorns, I am not opposed to the idea of these blood-thirsty, fanged, venomous creatures either. Peterfreund does something new with unicorn lore, but she sells it.

    The book did not really take off for the first couple hundred pages in my mind, mostly because Astrid spent them trying to escape her destiny. She whined and wished for things to be different. While entirely understandable and necessary even, this does not make for the most exciting reading. Once she starts coming into herself more and accepting her unicorn hunter-ness, the book starts moving at a very quick pace.

    The action scenes are well done and do not go on long enough to be boring. The book is definitely violent; be prepared for bloodshed and bad things to happen. Peterfreund tackles really important issues, such as what exactly constitutes virginity and rape. She does so very well, presenting ideas without beating the audience over the head with her opinions. These parts really make the reader think. I even think that (sections, at least) of this book could be used in a study on virginity for a sexual ethics course (yes, they do exist, as I took one).

    Shameful though it may be thought to admit it, I worried a bit about a book where the main character has to remain virginal or lose what makes her the main character. I suspected there would be a lack of romance and male characters, since romance in paranormal books often equals sex these days. Let me just say that there is romance in this book, although there are no overdramatic declarations of love on first eye contact.

    I highly recommend this book for fantasy lovers. It has action, romance and well-drawn, multi-faceted characters that grow and change through the series. This might be a good book for Hunger Games fans searching for something else exciting and fantastical, although not quite as heartbreaking.
  • Rating: 3 out of 5 stars
    3/5
    So this book is about teenage virgins who fight killer unicorns because it's their inherited destiny. I enjoyed the adventure well enough, and I think that the discussions of virginity, and at one point rape, were useful for the audience, but I had a bit of a problem with suspense of belief. However, it was NOT with the killer unicorns or the destiny of the young ladies in question. What I had a problem with was the actions and beliefs of a lot of the characters. The main character's mother is basically insane in her quest for her daughter to be a hunter, throwing the girls carelessly in harms way in the name of glory. Then she suddenly collapses after one battle and locks herself in a room with lots of weapons threatening to harm herself. After establishing that she was seriously unstable, I suppose the latter made sense, but I just had a terrible time believing that she would be so disconnected from reality before that when it's been established that what everyone thought was her delusion was totally true all along. Also, everyone involved seems very tied up in bloodlines and their expectations for the girls. After everything else having to do with the Order has been thrown by the wayside and considered outdated and ripe for change, to rely so heavily on something that ridiculous feels like it doesn't fit.There were a few parts that I had trouble dealing with the characters' believability, but lots of action and thoughtful discussions made it an overall positive experience.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    When I saw killer unicorns, I figured this book would be very weird, but I had to check it out. It was surprisingly good. Sure, killer unicorns are a little strange, but it was written so well that it didn't seem all that crazy. Fun book, will definitely have to read the next in the series.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    Library Summary: "After sixteen-year-old Astrid Llewelyn survives a vicious unicorn attack, she learns that she is a descendant of the most famous unicorn hunter of all time and she must travel to Rome, Italy, to train in the ancient arts in order to carry on her family legacy and save the world from the threat posed by the reemergence of lethal unicorns."I liked this book. It didn't have as much action as I thought it would, but the romance and mystery made up for that. I like how Astrid is a strong protagonist. She doesn't appear weak or annoying as female protagonists can sometimes be. Especially in a story like this. I also like how this can change our opinion on unicorns. They appear as harmless mythical creatures with horns and fluffy tails, but are they really? Have we ever stopped to consider that not only could they be real, but dangerous as well? This book puts an exciting new twist on these creatures. I recommend this book to all of my friends!
  • Rating: 2 out of 5 stars
    2/5
    Rampant was a book that I was looking forward to reading but fell a little bit flat. I was very excited about reading a book that put unicorns in a different light and about girl warriors that fight them. Books that put an original spin on something usually makes it better in my mind and Peterfreund did a good job on that but... There was just something missing from the book and not just the usual- there are no adults around so lets do what we want to do! There was a lack of caring in the book. The only people who seemed to have a real connection is Astrid and her cousin Phillipa but even that is not explored to the fullest extent. I also did not like the love interest Giovanni, he just did not strike the right cord with me. This most likely has to do with his best friend being such a jerk but still... There is also a rape that takes place and I feel that it was not treated with the care that it should have been. It was more of a- now she cannot be a warrior, shame on her for dating a boy! I felt a bit sick when there seemed a lack of caring from the "responsible" adults or friends. Especially Astrid's mother. I shudder to think that there are mothers out there who may even resemble her. She made me want to take a shower to take of the icky feeling I got from this book.However, it was not all bad. I did like was the world in which it was set and the different types/levels of unicorns the girls had to fight. The history of Alexander the Great and the bloodlines which spanned the globe was well researched and the action helped keep the book from being a complete dud. I mean come on, Astrid was fighting killer unicorns! I liked that they actually had an instructor to teach them. Although their innate skills were good, they still had to hone them to be great.
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    When I was little, every night I'd go outside with my dad and little sister to wish on a star. Every night my sister wished for a horse. Every night I wished for... a unicorn. Back then, I couldn't think of anything I wanted or needed more than a unicorn. Granted, I'd never met Diana Peterfreund's unicorns. If I had though, I'm almost positive I would've just wished for a horse.Rampant was an amazing story, complete with bloodthirsty unicorns, a kickass heroine, and a touch of romance. I was completely enthralled with the plot of this novel: maiden warriors who hunt carnivorous unicorns. Honestly, who wouldn't be at least a little curious? I found the pace of the story a bit slow at times, but, overall, I was kept interested throughout the story. Even if action was lacking, the history and romantic plot line kept me coming back for more! I have never heard of unicorns being portrayed as anything other than gentle, magical creatures, but Peterfreund made it easy to believe that just maybe, we had the story all wrong. The background story was also well written and meshed perfectly with Astrid's story.I liked most of the characters in Rampant. I thought Astrid and the other hunters were well rounded and each had a distinct personality. I really liked Giovanni as a love interest - I was surprised to find that Astrid falls for an American guy, not an European guy - even if he did have a very Italian name! I thought that was a cute twist!I did, however, have a major problem with Astrid's mother. She was absolutely horrible. I don't mean horribly written necessarily, she was just a horrible mother. I found that really frustrating. I felt that not only did she try to live her dreams through Astrid, she also didn't really seem to have much common sense. Then, she changes completely later in the book, seemingly due to traumatic events, though they were not only caused by her, but also acknowleged and accepted. Gah! She annoyed me to no end!
  • Rating: 2 out of 5 stars
    2/5
    For a book with such a fun premise, it was mired with general angst and more interest in virginity than a coming of age high school movie. All this talk about killer unicorns makes me expect a fun romp with death and destruction. The book delivered some of that, but it also forced me through a few scenes where the main character tries to sleep with someone for various petty reasons. There was also some rape, which is in general unpleasant, but when involving the one character I actually gave a damn about, became devastating.Overall, I wish there was more world building. I know that they came to ruins unaware of the history, but I would have liked to discover that with them, instead of being treated to tempting snippets and denied the rest.
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    Killer unicorns and the girls who hunt them: what a great idea! The characters were believable and the pacing was mostly good and I really felt that the story was in a well researched and believable world. I loved the fact that there were several different types of unicorns based on the many mythologies in the world. And, finally, a male love interest that isn't some writer's ideal. Giovanni is complex and not sappy. Yay! The book may have some problems, but I found it to be an enjoyable experience. Can't wait to read the next one.

Book preview

Rampant - Diana Peterfreund

1

WHEREIN ASTRID IS THRICE TESTED

‘I WILL NEVER REALLY LEAVE,’ said the unicorn. Diamond sparkles floated from the tip of its glittering silver horn. ‘I will always live in your heart.’

I swallowed the bile rising in my throat and forced myself to continue reading.

Then the unicorn turned and galloped away, its fluffy pink tail swinging merrily as it spread its iridescent wings to the morning sunshine.

Oh, no. Not wings, too.

Every time the unicorn’s lavender hooves touched the earth, a tinkling like the chime of a thousand fairy bells floated back toward the children.

Shuddering, I raised my head from the picture book to look at the rapt, upturned faces of my charges. Bethany Myerson, aged six, was holding back tears as the unicorn bid good-bye to its new friends. Brittany Myerson, aged four, was chewing on the tail of her stuffed poodle.

And I, Astrid Llewelyn, aged sixteen, just wanted the brats to go to sleep. I think that’s enough for tonight, huh, girls?

No! They shrieked in unison.

I sighed and returned to the saccharine story. I usually like babysitting, but taking care of the Myerson girls is intolerable. Always with the unicorns in this house. Each kid has a half dozen plush or plastic horned beasts lying piled on her bed, and Bethany’s bedroom is even ringed with a wallpaper border of unicorn heads with shimmering eyes and horns that glow in the dark.

I could hear Lilith now: Well, kiddo, at least it means they’ve been decapitated.

My friend Kaitlyn has a mortal fear of clowns. Her mom took her to Ringling Brothers circus in her formative years, and this white-painted thing with a huge blue wig and a bulbous, blinking red light for a nose scared the crap out of her. She won’t even go to the state fair, and we’re in high school. Parents can really scar a kid with stunts like that.

Sometimes I wondered if my mother, Lilith, understood the kind of damage she was inflicting on me with all her delusional stories about bloodthirsty unicorns. When I was six, and all my friends wanted to play unicorns and run around the playground on imaginary horned mounts named Rainbow and Starlight and Moonbeam, do you think I was the most popular kid in school?

I briefly considered giving the Myerson kids the same lecture I’d given the other first graders on the playground:

Unicorns are man-eating monsters. They don’t have wings, they aren’t lavender or sparkly, and you could never catch one to ride without its goring you through the sternum. And even if it somehow managed to miss your major arteries—and it never misses—you’d still die from the deadly poison in its horn. But don’t worry. My great-great-great-great-great-aunt Clothilde killed the last one a hundred and fifty years ago.

Except now I guessed it would be more like a hundred and sixty. How time doth fly in a unicorn-free world. Also, now I no longer believed my mom’s horror stories.

After several more pages of cotton-candy torture, the book ended and I firmly tucked Bethany and Brittany into bed. At last. Lulled into soporific splendor by the lackluster adventures of Sparkle the Unicorn and his merry band of Ritalin dependents, the girls soon drifted into the Land of Nod.

Good riddance.

I wished I could forget my early indoctrination and act sanguine about these namby-pamby unicorn stories. But one-horned beasts of any stripe still gave me the willies.

My mother considers herself a militant purist. She believes that this so-called revisionist unicorn history is a disgrace to the sacrifice of our ancestors. That we should be honoring their memories by promoting the truth about these vicious beasts.

These vicious, extinct beasts, I reminded her whenever I was feeling particularly cheeky. Usually, I didn’t deign to answer at all. I’d long ago learned that indulging her fantasies meant chaining myself to her lifestyle.

I set up my trusty baby monitor, closed the bedroom door, and called Brandt on the cell phone Lilith finally got me last winter. They’re asleep. You can come over now, but I have to meet you outside.

This was more for my protection than out of consideration for the slumbering children. First of all, I don’t know how much more I could take of the unicorn-inspired decor. Their toys were all over the house. Second, Brandt and a couch—or worse, an empty master bedroom—were a very bad combo. He morphed from vaguely risqué fling to bad-boy octopus man whenever he was in the vicinity of any marginally promising flat surface.

I was far less interested in protecting my virtue than I was in not giving it up to a boy who couldn’t pass intermediate French.

But despite his problems with the Gallic tongue, Brandt was not lacking in other characteristics prized by that culture. Like the kissing kind. A few minutes later, I was sitting on the front porch of the Myersons’ house, waiting for him to arrive and wondering what would happen when he did. The forest smelled wet and moldy tonight, and someone in the neighborhood must have had a fireplace going. In the gloom beyond the oblong bit of lawn illuminated by the house lights, I watched the trees swaying in the night breeze. They flashed the white undersides of leaves at me, then the dark tops, moving in a strange, solemn rhythm beyond my comprehension. I stared at them for a while, hypnotized, then suddenly shivered. When you sit in the only lighted spot in an area, you can’t help but think something is watching you—trees, little night critters, ravenous insects swarming just beyond the reach of your eyes.

The hairs rose on the back of my neck. Something was watching me. I glanced up at the bedroom window, half expecting the pale face of one of the Myerson girls to be pressed up against the glass, despite the lack of noises coming from the baby monitor. But no one was there. Still, the fear didn’t dissipate. I turned my attention to the fringe of woods, as if I’d be able to see little cartoon eyes blinking out at me from the darkness.

Silly Astrid. No more unicorn stories before bedtime, I thought in my best impression of Lilith. She was probably at home reading up on unicorns in one of her many rotting old bestiaries. It’s her favorite hobby, but she considers it serious research.

In the eyes of her family and the university discipline department that pulled her academic funding around the time she got knocked up with me, my mom is…eccentric. Unbalanced. They mean nuts. By the time I was born, it was bye-bye Ph.D., hello career of short-lived stints in every field from medical transcription to window washing. My uncle—her brother—always said my mom had so much potential. Too bad about the crazy.

Was my mom really bitter that she hadn’t hunted unicorns, or was it just that she was a single mom in a series of dead-end jobs whose biggest hobby was studying a field of cryptozoology that even the biggest Loch Ness Monster nuts wouldn’t consider valid?

Extinct, venomous, killer unicorns. As eccentricities go, it was rather disappointing. A pathology that she’d—I don’t know, dated Elvis—would have been far more bragworthy and less likely to get weird looks at cocktail parties. Not much glory involved in spouting off about great hunts of the past generation or bragging about how you could trace your ancestors back to pre-Christian military overlords. If you’re going to imagine that unicorns are real, wouldn’t it be better if they were also still around?

One could make the argument that the reason she’d decided her unicorns were extinct was so she wouldn’t be saddled with the burden of actually producing one and proving she’s right. I know I’m much happier that she believes in extinct unicorns instead of in live ones. As it was, most of our extended family ignored her. As Uncle John says, as long as she doesn’t actually see unicorns, keeps her job, and never puts her only child in bodily danger, it doesn’t count as psychosis. And he would know, since he’s a doctor. Well, an orthodontist, but it counts.

I shivered again. All these unicorn thoughts were doing nothing to put me at ease.

A few moments later, Brandt showed up and I shook it off. He ambled up the walk, his arms full of a ratty tartan blanket he’d retrieved from the backseat of his car. Hey, ya, he called. I thought we could go sit in the woods.

Sit? I wondered if he’d washed the spread since breaking up with his last girlfriend, with whom, rumor had it, he did things that are illegal in fourteen states. How about we just hang out on the porch? We shouldn’t get too far from the house. I said by way of an excuse, What if the girls wake up?

We won’t go far. Besides, you’ve got that walkie-talkie thing. He slung his arm around my shoulders and steered me toward the backyard, which, like most of the homes in the development, abutted one corner of a state park. The trees flashed white and dark in greeting. Come on—I’ll protect you from the monsters.

I rolled my eyes. Yeah, but who would protect me from Brandt? Tall, with killer blue eyes and sandy blond hair, Brandt Ellison had half the girls in my class swooning. And about a month and a half ago, he’d turned that devastating grin of his in my direction. It would have been social suicide to turn down an opportunity like that. I’d have been forever branded a frigid snob or a lesbian—neither of which was a label I had any strong desire to bear. So I went out with him. Current count held Brandt and me at three trips to Starbucks, fifteen shared cafeteria lunches, a movie, a party, and one pizza and video night.

And now, approaching day forty of the Brandt-and-Astrid Watch, my friends had changed their interrogation script from Have you done it yet? to "Aren’t you ever going to do it?" Kaitlyn told me that I should just get it over with. That my lingering chastity was hampering all kinds of upward mobility. That if I didn’t pop my cherry soon, people would start to think I was saving it for something.

Which I wasn’t. There was nothing to save it for—not anymore. As previously noted, unicorns are extinct. I wondered if that line would work on my mom, whose discussion of my virtue could get downright medieval. Most people are aware of the mystical connection between virgins and unicorns. It’s been a popular subject in tapestries and paintings for thousands of years.

My mother, though, refers to these as historical documents. For all I knew, maybe she had an antique chastity belt hiding in her collection of historical volumes and other doodads. Our itsy-bitsy apartment over Uncle John’s garage was filled with her ancient junk.

I didn’t necessarily believe Kaitlyn, by the way. My cousin, Philippa, had been one of the most popular girls in our high school, and we’d pinky sworn when we were kids that we’d tell each other every base we passed. Phil graduated last year and headed off to college on her plush athletic scholarship without any kind of horizontal action having taken place. Last I spoke to her, the count still put me at second base, Phil flirting with light third.

Phil never worried that she was weird for not having sex or for laughing at boys who asked her to. Of course, she paddled in the non-batty end of the Llewelyn family gene pool. Phil was also a dentist’s daughter and a big volleyball star, so naturally she ranked higher on the popularity scale than an impoverished sophomore whose major accomplishment to date was racking up the most hospital volunteer hours per semester for two years running.

Brandt spread the blanket on a bed of leaves a few tree rows away from the backyard—far enough in to provide decent cover but close enough to the Myersons’ that the yellow porch lights filtered in through the limbs. There. He plopped down and patted the spot beside him. Still within screaming distance.

I smiled uneasily, hoping he referred to the possibility of Bethany or Brittany having nightmares, and joined him. Within thirty seconds, he was kissing me. Open mouth. With tongue.

Okay, that sounds bad. But it’s not like that, really. I wouldn’t say Brandt was actively pressuring me. Whenever we were making out and I removed his hand from the inside of the waistband of my panties, he kept it removed for the duration of the session, and he never made any of those Come on baby, it will feel so good or you know you want it or but all the other kids are doing it noises like the guys in those date rape videos they had us watch in Current Issues, which was PC-speak for Sex Ed. However, he always carried condoms in his pocket—another trick from Current Issues—and I knew, I just knew, that in about eight minutes he was going to try to undo the buttons on my jeans.

Again, Brandt surprised me, crossing that barrier in under five. Stop it, I said gently, moving his hand to a safer zone. Usually, if I distract him by letting him get to second base, he forgets all about areas south of my belly button.

But it didn’t work this time. He backed off. No offense, he said, not meeting my eyes, but exactly how long is this going to take?

I don’t know if it’s possible to follow no offense with something that doesn’t offend. "How long is this going to take?’ What do you mean by this?" I snapped.

He turned away, not that I could see his face very well in the dark, and ran his hand through his hair in frustration. That’s not what I mean, Astrid. I like you a lot.

And I like you, I replied, reaching for his hand. I’m just not ready for that.

How do you know unless you let me touch you?

"I mean, I’m not ready for—that—even."

He let out a sound halfway between a groan and a snort and fell back against the ground. This was the point in the videos where the boys talked about how much pain they were in because the girls were saying no. This was the point where Kaitlyn says that if a girl doesn’t put out, she should at least give the guy a hand job.

But I didn’t offer and Brandt wasn’t complaining, just lying there playing with the end of my blond braid, which was long enough to brush the blanket when I was propped up on my elbows.

What did I really know about him? I knew he wanted to get a swimming scholarship to college and that he had three older brothers and that his favorite pizza topping was barbecued chicken and that he didn’t read books, not even Harry Potter.

(Lilith wouldn’t let me read Harry Potter because there was a whole thing in there about drinking unicorn blood that she said was inappropriate. I sneaked Kaitlyn’s copy and the unicorn bit is maybe a paragraph or so of the entire novel. Whatever.)

Were these the sort of things that I wanted to base an intimate relationship on? Barbecued chicken pizza and the butterfly stroke? He’d never even asked me why I spent so many hours at the hospital. Never asked me what I wanted to do in college.

On the other hand, the prom was a month from now, and if Brandt took me, I’d be one of the few sophomores at the dance. I could deal with that variety of abnormal. Going to prom would be…something. Maybe something worth letting him put his hands inside my pants for.

In the woods, the darkness shifted.

Did you see that? I asked, sitting up straight. I knew there’d been something out there.

The braid popped out of Brandt’s fingertips. No. What? There’s something moving in there. I could see it. I could…feel it. Like earlier, on the porch, only more so. So much more so. What do you think it is?

He shrugged. A deer.

Of course. It was just the size for a deer, too. So then why was I standing up and striding off the blanket and into the trees? I’d seen plenty of deer.

Astrid! Where are you going?

If it were a deer, then Brandt’s whining and my shuffling through the carpet of fallen leaves would have scared it off. Heck, almost any wild animal would have been leery of all that noise. But there it was, just a few trees over. Standing, frozen, as if waiting. I stepped into the tiny clearing, and the creature emerged from the shadows.

And, no, it was not a deer.

Not a goat, either, though that would be the closest term I could use to describe the way it looked. A goat, or maybe some sort of small antelope. Its fur was white and shaggy and reminded me a bit of the hair on a llama. Its back was about thigh high, and its head and neck hovered somewhere near my waist. Of course, the horn made the creature look much bigger. Protruding in a straight line from the center of its forehead, it was easily half the length of my arm, and twisted like a screw.

Suddenly, I couldn’t breathe. My mother’s psychosis was not only genetic, it had uniformity of type as well.

I was seeing unicorns.

The unicorn looked up at me with eyes as blue as a Siamese cat’s, and let out a little bleat that sounded nothing whatsoever like fairy bells. It stepped forward cautiously. This was no hallucination. I prepared to be rammed through the heart, and wondered idly if the poison was very fast acting.

Now I wished I’d paid attention to Lilith all those years. Of course, if I had, I’d simply think that unicorns didn’t exist anymore, rather than that Mom was nuts and they’d never existed at all.

The unicorn was only a few inches away from me now. I couldn’t look away. But then it bent one leg and swept into what looked for all the world like a low, very formal bow. The tip of its horn missed my body by millimeters in its semicircular trip to the ground.

I stood stock-still for several seconds, but the unicorn didn’t appear to be preparing for the death blow. Maybe I could just back out of the clearing slowly. But as soon as I lifted my foot from the ground, the unicorn looked up.

Nice goat, I said softly. Gooooood goat. Stay… I took a step. The unicorn came forward and pushed its head under my hand like some sort of horned golden retriever waiting to be scratched behind the ears.

Terrified of angering it, I scratched. The unicorn bleated in ecstasy. Lilith had never once mentioned this. Why wasn’t I being killed on the spot?

Astrid? You okay?

The unicorn stiffened, and the noises it was making turned into menacing growls. Did Brandt see what I saw?

Fine, Brandt. Just, um, stay where you are, okay? The unicorn trembled with rage. Its lips curled in a snarl, revealing pointed white teeth.

Christ, Astrid, what is that thing? Brandt broke into the clearing.

With the shrieking howl of a bloodthirsty beast, the unicorn charged straight at him.

2

WHEREIN ASTRID IS CALLED TO DUTY

I WATCHED IN HORROR as Brandt fell backward. I think I even screamed. The unicorn, ready for a second attack, froze, then promptly reared and took off, cloven hooves scattering the fallen leaves as it went.

Brandt was gulping and squealing, clasping his leg as blood gushed out in a macabre little fountain from the puncture wound the unicorn had left in his thigh. My first aid training told me this meant the unicorn had ruptured Brandt’s femoral artery. And it soon became clear that the blood loss was the least of our worries.

Brandt’s skin became pallid, and his blood vessels stood out in a violent violet red, protruding so far from his body that they looked almost like the ridges on corduroy. His eyeballs drained of color, and from the sounds he was making as he tried to breathe, I guessed his throat was closing up. I had no idea what these symptoms meant. Not anaphylactic shock, as there was no way he’d come in contact with a unicorn before. Septic shock would reduce the blood flow as his heart shut down, but if anything it seemed as if Brandt was suffering from tachycardia. I could almost hear his pulse pounding from a foot away.

Yep, the horn poison was fast acting, all right. And what could 911 do to counteract alicorn venom?

I called my mom. Lilith, I said, cradling the phone against my ear as I tied an arm of my sweater in a tourniquet around Brandt’s leg and weighed how best to break the news. She hated when I teased her.

Astrid, we’ve talked about how you’re only supposed to use your phone for emergencies. Our budget’s tight. Lilith sounded bored. But I was about to feed her delusion for the first time in ten years. Uncle John would be so disappointed in me.

This guy got gored by a unicorn and he’s turning purple.

Brandt let out a muffled moan. His tongue had swelled and his skin was clammy to the touch. I clearly needed to brush up on my diagnostics, because I hadn’t the slightest clue what to do next. Keep his airways clear. Stop the bleeding. But cleanse the poison? Way too late.

What? Lilith seemed to wake up on the other end. Little wonder. She’d probably been waiting her whole life for this moment.

A unicorn, I repeated. Mom, come quick. He might die. As soon as I gave her the directions and hung up, I dialed 911 and told them to get a paramedic over here, stat. And then I sat there and stared at Brandt. I stroked his hand and made soothing noises. I made sure he was comfortable there on the ground and that the tourniquet was tight. I marveled how quickly I’d stopped thinking of him as boyfriend and started to picture him only as patient.

Blood began to soak through my sweater and pool in the leaves. It was a really nice sweater, too. Angora blend, a gift from Phil. Not that it mattered if it could save his life. But I doubted it would be the blood loss that did him in. I looked at his face and tried not to be sick. I’d kissed that face. I’d seen it across the lunch table for more than a month. But now I barely recognized it. Alicorn venom was clearly some nasty stuff. Either that or my blossoming madness had supplied visions far worse than any I’d found in diagnostics illustrations.

Hang on, Brandt. I forced myself to stick by his side, though more than anything I wanted to—in order—vomit in the leaves, run for the hills, and dump a whole carton of stain remover on my sweater. Why couldn’t I do this? I wanted to be a doctor, for goodness sake! I’d seen much worse as a candy striper at the hospital.

But never someone I knew; never someone I was debating letting get to third base; and, most of all, never a victim of my childhood terror, the unicorn.

Why hadn’t it attacked me? And where was it now? I thought about the baby monitor, back on the blanket. Should I run and get it? Could I leave Brandt alone?

I’ll be right back, okay?

But he grabbed me with a bloody hand, choked out something unintelligible, and stared at me wide-eyed. I sank back to my knees. The kids should be fine. The door was closed. As long as they didn’t wander outside…Oh, God, please don’t let them wander outside!

At long last, I heard my mother calling from the edge of the woods. She strode through the trees, and I saw that she’d brought with her this gorgeous, golden, blown-glass vial that has been sitting in a place of honor in our den for as long as I can remember. She’d always claimed that she got it in the same spot where she met my de facto sperm donor—I mean, my father—and that it contained something very precious.

I’d never wanted to know what exactly she found so precious about a dirty glass she procured during an anonymous one-night stand that had cost her a scholarship and a career. My friends wonder why I’m not sleeping around? Let’s just say I live with my cautionary tale.

I waved her over, and she took in the scene at once: my tousled hair and swollen lips; the rumpled blanket a few yards away; and most of all, Brandt, who was by this time the color of rotten meat and quaking with odd spasms. She gave me a look that clearly said we’ll talk later, brushed me aside, knelt, and brandished the vial over him like a magician performing a trick.

Suffice it to say, the stuff in the vial had dried out, but she poured some lukewarm Coke—of all things—inside, swished it around, and dumped most of the contents down Brandt’s throat.

As soon as he stopped convulsing, which was relatively quickly, Brandt grabbed Lilith’s hand. What did you give me, you psycho?

Lilith responded by shaking the rest of the mixture onto his wound, which began to close immediately. Brandt took one look at that and started screaming, which seemed a bit odd to me, given the fact that the danger was over. Now he screamed? He must not have gotten a good look at his corduroyed face. I had, and, let me tell you—totally screamworthy. Plus, he was writhing so much that I could barely observe the effects of the Coke on his leg.

That’s it, Lilith said with a shrug. God help us if it attacks again. She blew her shaggy bangs out of her face and looked at me, completely ignoring Brandt’s shrieks and the fact that lights were turning on all over the neighborhood. I could only imagine what Bethany and Brittany were thinking. Do you know where it is now, Astrid?

I looked at Lilith, incredulous. It ran off.

I know, she said, clearly annoyed. "Where is it now?"

As if I would somehow know!

Pretty soon after that, the police and EMT came, and Lilith fed them some story about a rabid goat roaming the woods that had attacked Brandt and me. See? She’s usually quite lucid. And, probably thanks to the effect her theories had on her thesis adviser, she liked to keep this unicorn stuff in the family. Otherwise, I’m sure Uncle John would have had her committed long ago.

I backed her up of course (what, you think I’m going to say unicorn to cops?), and Brandt seemed a bit foggy on the details. According to the paramedic, the wound looked way too small to have resulted in so much blood loss, but Brandt might need a transfusion, judging by his sluggish pulse and low blood pressure. Considering the way his veins had been looking before my mom showed up—and I think I saw practically every one—I thought that might be a good idea.

The Myersons returned home about that time to discover their driveway overrun with every parent’s worst nightmare: cars with flashing lights. Though appalled that all this happened in their backyard, they seemed far more relieved to learn that their children had come through unscathed than upset that I’d left Brittany and Bethany alone in the house while my boyfriend came over.

They were also too distraught by the situation to remember to pay me, but I figured I shouldn’t push my luck.

Of course, the fun part of my evening was just beginning. First, I had to wrestle the car keys off my mother, who was entirely too excited to drive. The whole way home, I was treated to a monologue about how this discovery would be the end of all our problems, would make people believe in her research at last; speculation about where in the world this pocket of surviving unicorns could have been hiding for the past hundred years—the Canadian Rockies?—and what could have made this particular unicorn wander out now; and of course, an earful on the merits of waiting.

The weekend was more of the same. My mother went back to the forest near the Myersons’ house on three separate occasions, twice during the day and once at night, searching for more evidence that Brandt and I had indeed seen a unicorn. Nothing. No spoor, no tracks, no tiny mutilated animals that would have indicated that a poisonous, killer beast had moved into the neighborhood. I stayed indoors and waited for the police to call and tell me they’d found a wandering madwoman in the woods. They never called me, but, then again, neither did Brandt, and the one time I phoned him, his mother informed me that he wasn’t home. He wasn’t at the hospital, either—I checked. Where else would you go the day after you almost died?

In between, I was a captive audience for Lilith’s lectures on the history of our illustrious family, starting from when Alexander the Great was nine years old and tamed the fearsome karkadann, Bucephalus. Though the history books teach that Bucephalus was Alexander’s trusty warhorse, according to my mom—and several ancient Alexander biographers whose sources were, shall we say, extremely suspect—the beast that the great king rode when he conquered half the world was actually a giant, man-eating Persian species of unicorn called a karkadann.

In the accounts my mother read me, the stable keepers in Alexander’s father’s palace were planning on having the horse destroyed because he was anthrophagos, which is Greek for he breakfasted on the stable boy—or something like that. His name, Bucephalus, was another clue: it meant ox head—apparently, they couldn’t figure out what a horse was doing with a horn. Alexander, not even a teenager yet, was the only person who could approach the monster, the only one who could tame him. And thus, Bucephalus was spared, and a legendary partnership born.

Between Bucephalus’s dietary proclivities, venomous horn, and sharp fangs and Alexander’s military strategy and prowess with a sword, the two of them cut quite a swath through the Middle East back in the day, conquering every civilization they came across, taking over half the known world. According to my history teacher, the horse died somewhere in what is now Pakistan, where Alexander named a city after him, then went home for good.

According to my mother, Bucephalus vanished into the Himalayas, and Alexander, distraught, found he no longer wielded the power that proximity to the unicorn had given him all his life.

So basically, everything was business as usual in my own personal nuthouse until school on Monday, when Brandt finally put together all of the details of the evening. Or at least enough of them to know that we’d forced him to drink something and that I’d called my mom before I dialed 911. His revenge was swift and terrible, and I found myself boyfriendless and humiliated before first period was over.

By lunchtime, even Kaitlyn was giving me a wide berth. Is it true? she asked, her voice muffled by the bathroom stall door. I was hiding in the girls’ room until I could be sure that my face had gone from utter-mortification magenta to a more reasonable I’ve-been-dumped mauve.

I sniffled once or twice and availed myself of another square of toilet paper. I still hadn’t determined if I was most upset by the public breakup, the fact that I might have inherited mental instability, or the possibility that my mom was actually right.

It depends on what he’s saying. For instance, if he was saying that he’d been attacked and poisoned by a miniature unicorn and then magically cured with the final dregs of a mystical panacea known as the Remedy—and everything else my mom had been blabbing about all weekend—then yeah. Pretty much true.

Brandt’s telling everyone you slipped him drugs and sicced a rabid goat on him, then you and your mom orchestrated a massive cover-up when the police came.

That’s a lie! I lied.

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