I Do 2

By TnT Corlis

After over 30 years of marriage, recently estranged couple Richard and Jen are travelling to their only child, Donna’s wedding. He still loves her; she still wants to kill him. Fate mixed with nature wants to kill them both. With Richard’s persistence and Jen’s tenacious pursuit of the truth they uncover sadness, happiness and riotous misunderstandings as they journey towards their daughter’s wedding.

• Language: English
• Publisher: BookBaby
• Release date: Jul 27, 2013
• ISBN: 9780987462411

Book preview

true.

CHAPTER 1

Check-in congestion.

Her phone rang, it was Donna; I don’t know if your father will be bringing his new piece of fluff or whatever he calls her, Jennifer said to her daughter on her mobile as she stood outside the airport. Her daughter could hear the now familiar pain thinly disguised in her voice, it wavered, like she was drawing in a breath to fight back her tears.

The crowded airport overwhelmed her, as she looked at all the people coming and going. The wind was blowing across the front of the electric doors as they continually opened and closed in front of her. She could hear the busyness inside the airport and the voices of people talking as they walked past her in different directions. She caught her reflection in the glass as the door closed and could see the wind had blown her hair about wildly. She lifted her arm and tried to push it back into place. She paused momentarily and had a good look at herself. She could see the signs of stress building on her face as her reflection peered back at her. She pushed her right palm against her forehead; lifted it towards the top of her scalp and the tension lines between her eyebrows disappeared.

I just hope it won’t ruin our day mum, that’s all.

Jen heard the apprehension in her voice.

I know what you mean sweetheart, just remember, I love you, and I will see you soon, she told her daughter as she closed her phone. Jen looked skyward in frustration as if searching for answers.

Jen drew a deep breath in and reached into her handbag. She paid the cab driver, her purse open, exposing photos of what appeared to be a happy family.

Don’t look too close buddy, she told him. You might see the other photo where I’m holding a knife to the throat of the cheating bastard. Jen’s voice had changed completely. It was gravelly and had a very serious, threatening undertone to it.

The cabbie, now slightly uncomfortable because as he handed Jennifer’s luggage to her wondered if she might use his throat for a trial run. He gingerly handed her suitcase to her but quickly pulled back. Jennifer wickedly squinted her eyes at the cabbie and he turned to get back into his car. He passed a nervous glance backward as he closed the door and sped off.

When she entered the airport lounge, a feeling of sadness overcame her. It’s been three weeks since she and Richard had spoken. She remembered he’d be on the same flight, shit; he’ll be sitting right next to her because it was she who booked their seats on the flight. They were still ‘happily’ married then!

As she walked towards the bar with her head lowered, she reasoned, there’s nothing like a quick drink to settle her nerves. Mind you, three sips of half scotch and water will have her on her way to being where most drinkers aim to be in a good session. Not much of a drinker and never was.

Thirty-two years, she commiserated with her subconscious. Thirty-two years and he has to throw it away to be with a woman half my age and twice as good looking.

Her thoughts were so all consuming as she reached the bar rolling her carry-on bag behind her, that she never even saw Richard. He was sitting, chatting with the young gorgeous, twenty something, bar attendant. Jen froze instantly when she heard his voice, then she spotted him and, spun around so fast she twisted her ankle. With a look of unbearable pain clouding her face, she hobbled away, literally dragging her left foot behind her, making a strange shuffling sound as it dragged along the floor. She had lost complete control of it. Her getaway was not pretty, but successful.

Jen painfully settled in the coffee lounge at the end of the bar and ordered a coffee liquor; she asked the attendant for a little more liquor and a bit less coffee. Her hands trembled with nerves. She positioned herself behind some artificial palms so she could see Richard’s reflection in the mirror on the far wall. She subtly positioned her carry-on bag in front of her legs in an attempt to partly hide behind it. She knew she would have to see him sooner or later but wasn’t prepared to run into him just yet. In her mind she had pictured them first seeing each other on the plane when they were seated. She could deal with that. She had played out this scenario in her mind for weeks; what she was going to do and say to him. The discomfort she had felt as she entered the airport was a walk in the park compared to how she was feeling now. It was the most uncomfortable sensation she had ever felt. All the years full of memories, but now an entire lifetime had been thrown to the wind. Her stomach felt like it was tied in knots and she felt a little faint.

After the coffee arrived, she toyed with one devilish thought.

If only a fiery plane crash would happen today then her troubles would be over, she could imagine his face as the plane broke up around him engulfed in flames. He was strapped in his seat and looking skyward screaming. Just for good measure she imagined him screaming her name, which inflated her ego momentarily.

Hold on a minute she thought, I’m on that bloody plane so cancel that thought, she said to herself as she sipped her coffee and glared at him between the fronds of the palm.

It seemed incredulous that Richard was so relaxed and as if he had no conscience about what had happened less than a month ago. Jen growled under her breath, Thirty-two years. She could feel her nerves begin to settle in her stomach but just as quickly her thoughts were replaced by rage.

Perhaps it was the eye flutter the attendant flashed as she handed his change back. At least Richard thought it was a flutter, but in reality her new eyeliner was having a slight reaction with her eyes causing them to itch.

Surely the bastard could feel some sadness, she thought. Jen noticed he only had one bag at his feet. She scanned the room. He must have left his dippy new girlfriend at home. That’s good; she wasn’t quite ready for that yet. Jen snarled under her breath and shook her head in disgust. Richard sat and chatted to the attendant like they were long lost friends and, then she noticed he changed the way he was sitting. Just when Jen felt she couldn’t watch any more, a large man sat right between Jen and Richard and obstructed her view. Jen wriggled her bottom on her chair to try and move and the chair made a loud screeching sound. She froze instantly with embarrassment. As her eyes widened she could see Richard behind the man’s right shoulder. He had moved into a position as if to say, I’m all ears and I’m all yours, Jen recognised that posture, shit, it had worked on her a long time ago.

Jen lifted her handbag, clutched at it, positioned it on her lap and wrapped her arms around it, as if to create an imaginary barrier between herself and what she was seeing. The pain was almost unbearable. She looked at the floor in defeat. She knew this was going to be the hardest thing she’d ever had to deal with. Oh, the drama she thought as she looked out the windows towards the tarmac.

Jen looked up at the flight monitors and realised it was time to check in. She got up quickly; she had to get to the check-in counter first so she could request that Richard be repositioned, hopefully for a less comfortable flight, maybe beside the toilets.

Richard, who had now moved from the bar, had ‘crashed and burned’ so to speak, after accidentally knocking his drink over the lovely attendant as she picked up some change she had dropped. Richard had then proceeded to ‘dry off’ the girl’s blouse, innocently of course. He was ever so politely told to ‘piss off’ and he left faster than a shot from a rifle, heading for check in as well.

Richard was coming from behind the artificial palms and checking over his shoulder to ensure his escape was clear, okay sorry, he said out loud, as he walked backwards and straight into the chest of the largest man he had ever seen. His body jolted like it had been hit by a prime mover. Somewhat confused, he still had enough comprehension to hear the deepest voice say,

YES MISS, I HAVE HIM RIGHT HERE, the security guard, who was wrapping his hand, with fingers that were the size of salami sticks and his palm the size of a catcher’s mitt, around Richard’s wrist, twisting his arm behind his back. With a two-way radio in his other hand he continued talking to the lady who must be in charge of security. He paused and nodded approvingly towards a surveillance camera mounted on the ceiling. Meanwhile Richard looked like he is a turkey that had been caught by a farmer for Christmas.

YES I HAVE HIM HERE AND WE ARE ON OUR WAY, the guard said. COME WITH ME SIR, he directed Richard.

I didn’t realise there was an option, Richard squeezed out between throws of pain. The security guard rounded the corner and headed for the bar, with Richard whose feet were only just making contact with the floor, the soles of his shoes making a distinct skidding sound.

I BELIEVE THERE IS AN APPOLOGY IN ORDER, SIR, the guard ordered as he released his grip from his arm, before winking at the bar attendant.

Look, miss, Richard stammered, I really didn’t mean to spill that drink over you and I was only trying to help when I tried to dry your blouse. Honestly. Richard was rubbing his arm trying to encourage the blood flow back to the tips of his fingers.

The bar attendant looked then at Richard and said in the sourest voice, that’s fine, then squirted him in the crotch with the post mix gun. Mellow yellow I do believe. She laughed loudly as she blew across the top of the nozzle like it was a real gun. The security guard hit Richard on his shoulder and began the deepest laugh. At the same time it felt as though his shoulder had been removed by a cannon ball and had ruptured every disc in his spine.

Richard grimaced in pain, his mouth agape, and one eye partly closed wishing for the ache from his shoulder to go away.

I DON’T WANT ANY MORE TROUBLE FROM YOU SIR, IS THAT CLEAR? the guard boomed at him.

You can be rest assured if you ever have any more trouble with me, Sir, my arm won’t make it through a second episode like you just gave it. Once again I apologise, Richard said in his sincerest voice and lowered his head at not only the bar attendant but also at the guard.

You can go now, Sir.

Thank you, Richard said from behind his crumpled ego and painful shoulder; his voice had a noticeable quiver in it. He cautiously turned around and left.

CHAPTER 2

Proctocolly yours.

Jen arrived at check-in to see the earlier flights passengers still battling to make their way through security.

Oh, great, she said to herself as she looked over her shoulder to see if Richard was coming.

Not yet. She sighed with relief. Looking at the queue in front, Jen noticed a young girl was staring back at her, while at the same time she had her index finger deep inside her right nostril. Even though Jen was trying to pretend this didn’t bother her, the feeling of instantly wanting to gag overcame her. The child, obviously bright for maybe four years of age, had sensed this and really started to dig. Of course, Mum and Dad in front of her were too enthralled with the elderly couple that had stripped down as far as possible to prove they had nothing to hide.

Jen, while still trying not to look, even though she already had the picture in her mind, lowered her eyes to catch the child pulling out a booger that was almost as long as her entire finger. As it slid from her nostril a slimy piece of booger broke away from the main oyster and returned back to her upper lip like it was made from elastic. The young girl twisted and turned her hand as she admired her booger and twirled her finger to wrap it on. The tail of the booger slapped against her finger and clung to it. Grinning up at Jen she motioned at her to bend down. Jen was now doing her best to keep breakfast down whilst not making a scene. Cautiously she bent down trying not to look at the girl’s upper lip as there was still some green slime poking from her nostril. The little girl lifted her head and asked in an innocent voice, Want some? before thrusting the green monster toward her.

Jen’s cheeks filled quicker than a trumpet player mid way through a blues jamming session, difference being, it wasn’t wind. Her eyes filled with tears so quickly that the little girl’s face disappeared behind them and her own face instantly lost its rosy colour and turned pale grey. Jen’s cheeks rapidly filled and options were limited when she saw a lovely pot plant off to the side of the metal detector. The little girl hardly had time to admire the massive green streak when she was shoved to the side as Jen plummeted to her knees and emptied her mouth into the base of the plant.

The entire queue turned as they heard the heaving sound to see Jen holding the rim of the pot plant like a toilet bowl. Some of the blame could go towards the coffee liquor, which may have been a bit strong, but the bulk lay with the green monster.

Just as she was feeling the worst might be over, that terrible watery sensation filled her mouth as she pictured that booger, her eyes began to water again and the next wave of vomit left her. At the end of her stomach’s massive constriction Jen’s voice made a painful sound like a dog at the end of its growl. If that plant was large enough Jen felt like she could crawl inside and hide forever, but no pot was large enough to hide her from what was about to happen. As she was standing back up, with vomit on her blouse and a little in her hair she felt her stomach tighten again. Instinctively she put her hand on her stomach and started to return to the pot plant. Then she let out the loudest fart that even the sniffer dogs on the other side of the detector groaned. The most horrified look was now on her face and the pale grey colour had been replaced with the brightest shade of red. Her face had changed colour more times than a chameleon. The entire area erupted in laughter. When Jen got to her feet she saw everyone looking at her and