My Accidental Jihad

Written by Krista Bremer

Narrated by Xe Sands

Fifteen years ago, Krista Bremer would not have been able to imagine her life today: married to a Libyan-born Muslim, raising two children with Arabic names in the American South. Nor could she have imagined the prejudice she would encounter or the profound ways her marriage would change her perception of the world.But on a running trail in North Carolina, she met Ismail. He was passionate and sincere-and he loved adventure as much as she did. From acquaintances to lovers to a couple facing an unexpected pregnancy, this is the story of two people-a middle-class American raised in California and a Muslim raised by illiterate parents in an impoverished Libyan fishing village-who made a commitment to each other without forsaking their own identities.It is the story of a bicultural marriage-and aren#8217;t all marriages bicultural? In any marriage, we might discover that our mate is foreign to us, with very different language, memories, and assumptions about home and family. How we respond to difference is what shapes our families, our communities, and our world.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Highbridge Company
• Release date: Apr 22, 2014
• ISBN: 9781622313921

Reviews for My Accidental Jihad

[danzilla72 · Rating: 2 out of 5 stars]

The topic of an American exploring Islam is outside of my typical wheelhouse, but this book seemed interesting enough to chance it. Some of the misunderstandings between Krista and Ismail were understandable, even predictable, but some differences were illuminating. The Libyan trip was a true insight, and made me both frustrated and furious.I noticed a trend that whenever they butted heads or disagreed, Krista would start out with a strong voice then completely collapse into "understanding" or "compromise" (which really wasn't compromise, just Ismail getting his way). For example, Krista vehemently disagreed with circumcision, Ismail demanded it. Krista spent weeks gathering research, talking to doctors/family/friends, and Ismail spent weeks ignoring all that and just repeating his wishes. Finally, she breaks down and has their child circumcised. Two years later, Ismail admits that maybe they shouldn't have done it. I have no opinions on circumcision, this just struck me as the main example of a "compromise" only ending Ismail's way.Krista has a strong literary backing, but she seemed to struggle with timing and segues. Many sections are choppy, 2 paragraphs in the book's current timeline, 4 paragraphs in some unnamed past, 1 paragraph back in the present. Makes for a very juggled read.Overall, the book was interesting but not really entertaining. I'm glad I read it, if only to shine a light on my own life and be thankful for what I have.I received this book through Early Reviewers on LibraryThing.

[imperfectcj · Rating: 3 out of 5 stars]

I received this as a review copy through LibraryThing.

There are parts of this book that really resonated with me, like the idea that Ramadan is a time to separate ourselves from our compulsions and silence the external noise so as to become closer to family, friends, and God, and how candid she is about her marital troubles and her personal feeling of slow suffocation. She touches on these really deep, resonant issues but then moves away to another subject too quickly. I wanted more of those bits. I think I might have felt more connected to her if she'd dug deeper.

The memoir also seemed a little disjointed. I don't mind jumping around to follow memories and trains of thought, but I was often confused about where I was in time.

I liked reading about places I remember from my time in that part of North Carolina (she doesn't mention them by name, but I'm content assuming I know just what live music venue they're at and what restaurant she and her husband visited on their first date). And her description of the oppressive Southern summer...man, was that right on.

I enjoyed reading about Bremer's struggle to define what surrender means in her life, but the memoir would have benefitted from a little more polish and a little more digging in.

[lorettar-1 · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

What an amazingly honest and well written story about a cross-cultural relationship and marriage. I really enjoyed hearing about the author’s experiences being married to a Muslim man. It gave me a very different insight about an average Muslim and their faith in contrast to what we hear about in the media. I gained such a respect for this married couple as they stayed committed to each other despite their ongoing struggles with their cultural differences. It was enlightening and touching to hear about how they learned to accept some of those differences and yet remained loyal to their own personal culture, faith, beliefs, and traditions. Definitely not easy and the author is very candid about her feelings and frustrations. I ended up enjoying this book a lot more than I anticipated and would recommend it to anyone that wants to open their mind and learn about cultures that are different from our own. Please note: I received a free copy of this book in exchange for my honest review.

[annikabirgitta · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

I received a free early review copy from LibraryThing last year, but somehow didn't get around to reading it. I found this memoir captivating and finished the book in one day. Quick and easy read. The book is full of humor and love and I really enjoyed the way it's written. I love the way the author covers the cultural differences between herself and her husband.

[dianekeenoy · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

I received my copy awhile ago and finally was able to pick it up this morning to see where to place it in my TBR pile. I read it in one sitting this morning as my chores piled up around me. The premise of this book has been written about thoroughly and well. Since I knew little about the Muslim religion and even less about the Libyan people, I found this memoir fascinating. The section regarding their trip to Libyia to meet her husband's family was eye opening. I enjoyed this book and look forward to Krista Bremer's next book.

[leaseylease · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

Liked this book. Very interesting to read how their respective cultures affected their marriage.

[knitwit2_1 · Rating: 3 out of 5 stars]

This couple had to work very hard to understand each other. The husband was Muslim (and older) but he did not expect the wife to participate in any way. She was somewhat self involved but worked to overcome this for the betterment of the family. Got married because she was pregnant - ironic as she worked for planned parenthood. Their trip to Libya is the best part of the book. His family doesn't know what to make of her.

[samsattler · Rating: 3 out of 5 stars]

"My Accidental Jihad" is the story of a young woman who, because she fell in love with an older Moslem man from Libya, found herself undertaking a very personal jihad all her own. No...not that kind of jihad. As Krista Bremer puts it in her book," the prophet Muhammed taught that the greatest jihad, or struggle, of our lives is not the one that takes place on a battlefield but the one that takes place within our hearts...the struggle to manifest humility, wisdom, and compassion." Bremer, in order to make her new romance work longterm was forced to "wrestle with my intolerance and self-absorption." And despite the odds against her, she won her personal jihad and, with the man who changed her life forever, created a beautiful new family of their own.The author's choice of partners was both wise and lucky in the sense that she met a Moslem man who did not insist that she live under the strict religious restraints that women around the world contend with every day. The open-mindedness that each brought to the relationship allowed them to grow spiritually and socially. Over the years, they have shared their respective cultures with their children and have managed to meld themselves into a family that recognizes the best - and worst- of both worlds. "My Accidental Jihad," while it is not exactly what I expected it to be from its title, is an inspirational story about what is possible when vastly different people are willing to listen to each other and to compromise to make someone else happy. Good stuff.

[katiekrug · Rating: 3 out of 5 stars]

Meh. Ms. Bremer grated on my nerves, as did her trite reflections on faith, culture, and marriage. I get it - you are a vain, shallow, surfer girl from California forced to confront all your assumptions about what life is about when you fall in love with a Muslim Libyan immigrant. How agonizing! I'm sorry, but to me, love shouldn't be this tortuous. And I wonder how much she exaggerates for the purposes of stretching what was, apparently, an essay into an almost-300 page book. There is some interesting insight in here, and her love for her husband and the life they build together is genuine and touching in places, but why is it worthy of a whole book? She's done what millions of other men and women have done, so my final reaction is really no more than a shrug.

[lauigl · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

I received an Advance Reading Copy of this book from LibraryThing Early Reviewer's Program in exchange for a fair and honest review, which I have given. Thank you LibraryThing and Algonquin Books. I truly enjoyed the first 3/4 of this book; it was the last 1/4 that went a little south for me. Krista Bremer shares her life with us, exposing what it's like to be an American woman married to an older Libyan-born Muslim man. It began as a memoir in which she gives us a glimpse of who she is and what she stands for, and then we gradually become familiar with her husband Ismail. I have to give Bremer credit for the candid way she reveals some very personal aspects of her life with Ismail. She's also very descriptive in the way she enlightens us about her own religious beliefs, which I have to admit I found a little disturbing. Her irreverent and flippant descriptions of God made me cringe at times. She appears very gullible and quick to adopt whatever traditional views pervade our society without having any real foundation of her own. This perceived personality trait helped me to understand (possibly) her initial attraction and subsequent marriage to her husband. He may have represented something unfamiliar and mystical. However, as we read on we can see how this fascination leads to revelations that are at times very difficult for her to relate to and comprehend. She takes us through her visit to Libya and the appalling conditions that shocked and saddened her. We also see the conflicts and struggles between her and Ismail because of cultural differences; but not enough so. This is where the book began to lessen in strength to me. I started to feel as though we weren't getting the full story of their lives together. This was a memoir after all, but it got a little disjointed and I felt as though there were parts of their lives that were excluded. When I read Not Without My Daughter by Betty Mahmoody, a true story of an American Woman who married a Muslim man who held her and their young daughter captive in Iran, I got to know all of the characters so fully that when it was over they stayed with me for a very long time. When I finished reading My Accidental Jihad It felt wanting, like I didn't get the full accounting of their lives together. I really didn't get to know enough about Ismail and their family in general. Nevertheless, the writing started out very strong and it held my interest nearly to the end. I applaud the author for revealing what we were privileged to learn about her family. I liked it and feel confident recommending it to others.

[vickileigh-1 · Rating: 2 out of 5 stars]

This book is well written and the style is relaxed, giving it more the feel of a novel then a non fiction book. Despite this, I didn't find the subject matter particularly engaging and it ended up being a slow read. There were some stories I found interesting, such as the trip to Libya, as it gave some insight to a country and culture I know little about. The rest of the book however, taking place in the US, I thought fell a little flat.

[millieanne_1 · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

This book was such a treat - well written, with a warm voice from the author and a perspective that is honest and engaging. I loved getting a picture of what it is like to live with someone who has a strong faith when you are not a person who does. It also showed me some of the beauty in the Muslim faith, which was intriguing. This is one of those books that is quotable, but more than that, it's one whose phrases and ideas come back to you as you are going about your everyday life. I truly enjoyed it.

[kerinlo_1 · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

I found this book to be engaging and honest. I appreciate the Krista Bremer's voice as she describes her life married to man that, by all appearances, is very different from her. I loved the way she weaves their lives together to showcase how we can be transformed by those we love, but stay true to ourselves at the same time. I especially loved her descriptions of her travels to Libya with her family. I would welcome a collection of stories from her that focus on her experiences there. All said, I truly enjoyed this narrative!

[aafkejantina · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

I thoroughly enjoyed reading Krista Bremer's book. Her style was clear, simple, straightforward, yet beautiful, humorous, informative. This non-fiction book read like a highly entertaining novel. Her story brought back memories of my early years in an intercultural marriage. I would highly recommend this book to anyone interested in learning about Muslim culture. I found the book brimming with honesty about sexual feelings in young women...insecurities, self esteem issues...Wonderful ! Thank you Early Reviewers for giving me the opportunity to read and share my thoughts.

[sincostani · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

As half of a inter-cultural marriage, I appreciated Krista Bremer's own story. My first impression was that she definitely writes beautifully! This is the most vividly described non-fiction I've read in a while, but it's also very easy to read; I couldn't put it down. I enjoyed reading her self-introspection and growth with regards to her unplanned marriage and life, and the journey towards Islam, for which she and her family seem to grow in understanding and regard.She writes very openly and honestly. I know that some other reviewers say that she seems to hold back, but as a person of Muslim and Middle Eastern background, I thought that she discussed many things that few from that upbringing would mention even in private conversations. She is very brave in my opinion. I'm very curious as to how the book was received by her Libyan relatives!

[bdouglas97 · Rating: 2 out of 5 stars]

I like most of the other reviewers came away with an empty feeling after reading this book. To me, it was a slow read, even though the author is a good writer. I also found the title confusing - as was the picture on the front.

[tracycampbell-1 · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

I really enjoyed this book. I am a child if a mixed race marriage, and while my situation growing up was quite a bit different, I felt a lot of similarities. This is a very well-written and, for me, a very poignant book. The author is honest about her struggles and doesn't claim to have the perfect answer for every issue. I must say, the ending was a bit cheesy though!

[maryreinert · Rating: 3 out of 5 stars]

Author's own "bright illusions of superiority"Near the end of this book the author tells of an instance being with a friend who makes what she considers a snide remark about Islam and reminds herself that she too once had a "soothing homogeneity, its bright illusions of superiority.." From my perspective, she still has an illusion of superiority; now however, it's her feeling of heterogeneousness. Although I definitely feel the author loved the man she married, I can't help but sense that it was that "difference" was a lot of the appeal. Even before meeting Ismail, the author relished a non-traditional path: "unshaved legs" and discussions about wearing a tampon on a nude beach. In short, being different from the pack was important and somehow more exhilarating, more interesting, more worthy.The book is definitely well-written and I appreciated the author's clarity, style of writing and wit throughout the book. However, I was disappointed in the subject matter. The daily challenges of marrying someone of a different faith were interesting. The trip to Libya and the meeting of Ismail's family was fascinating. Nevertheless, at times, the book had the tone of a tempest in a teapot; to her credit, she does reflect on her own self-absorption. Finally, I'm not sure I completely understand the title. As a westerner (she never calls herself Christian so not sure) living with a Muslim, she was forced to come to grips with her own intolerance and self-absorption calling that her "accidental jihad". However, the issues seem to be cultural rather than faith driven. She tells of attending church but nothing is said about her own personal faith and how that conflicts or reinforces her marriage or experiences with Islam. Ismail prays regularly, but I believe there is only one reference that she meditates. Religion is only a cultural difference and theology and belief are only important in that they affect culture. The author at one point is very concerned about the number of prayer rugs in the house; the rugs are more important to her than the act of prayer itself as her husband does remind her. The ending of the book just seems hokey; is swaying at a rock concert a religious experience? Was that to be a conversion experience? In short, although a good read, way less than I had expected.

[medixon_1 · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

An inspirational story of a cross-cultural marriage. Very interesting and readable. I did not want to put it down.

[joanies_1 · Rating: 3 out of 5 stars]

I gave this book three stars because it was well written. However, the content kept it from a higher rating. It was interesting to start, but became tedious after a few chapters. I expected a story of an American woman's adjustment to marriage to an older, Muslim man. Instead, it came across as a blog full of whine and complaints about how it all fell short for her. The chapter about her son's circumcision was particularly tedious and overdone. However,I found the chapters about their visit to Libya to be interesting and informative. Overall, I compare this book to an acquaintance whose complaining nature leads you to avoid their company. It just isn't worth your time.

[cobscook · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

My Accidental Jihad is the memoir of a blonde, blue eyed surfer girl's marriage to a older Muslim man originally from Libya. I went into this book expecting it to be about the prejudice the author encountered in post-9/11 America married to a Muslim man, but instead found the book to be a very thoughtful exploration of a merging of two cultures through marriage. Bremer discusses how her marriage has challenged her beliefs about what it means to be a woman in America, and how religion/spirituality impact everyday life. I was particularly engaged by her descriptions of visiting Libya with her husband. The differences between life under Gaddafi's rule and life in the US, both for men and for women, are unbelievable. It will really make you think before complaining about American politics. Many of the challenges that Bremer faces in her marriage do not come from external sources, rather they come from her own preconceived notions of what a woman should be and do. I admire her willingness to learn from another culture, and to be open to different ideals of womanhood. In America, women are told that they can do it all and have it all: wife, mother, successful career, healthy lifestyle, youthful looks. This leaves us constantly chasing perfection and leaves many of us unhappy. I was impressed that Bremer is examining those ideals but not finding any perfect solutions to the problem.

[schatje_1 · Rating: 3 out of 5 stars]

In this memoir, Krista Bremer describes her “incongruous and unexpected” marriage (266). She was a liberal, career-oriented woman when she met Ismail Suayah, a Libyan-born immigrant. He was “older, darker, poorer” (17) and had been raised in a traditional Muslim family. Spanning about a dozen years, the book focuses on their relationship, “a sticky marriage” (268) that “required arduous work” (266), and Krista’s jihad, her “struggle to increase self-discipline and become a better person” (95) and her wrestling with her “intolerance and self-absorption” (96).What is included in the book is interesting. The visit to Libya is especially informative and certainly was crucial in Krista’s growth. She had difficulty accepting the total absence of privacy and the lack of freedom, especially for women. She describes herself as being “weighed down by so much individualism, impatience and desire” (136). Eventually she came to realize that there are things about the women’s lives that she envied: “I ached for the intimacy they shared, for their selfless generosity, for their abiding faith and the slow pace of their daily lives, devoid of my typically American concerns: balancing career and family, saving for retirement, trying to stay fit and trim” (185).It is, however, what is missing that frustrated me. Since many of her family members are undoubtedly still alive, Krista seems to have left out much about them. How did they feel about her relationship with Ismail? How did they react to her dalliance with Islam? It would also have been interesting to know how society at large reacted to her marriage, especially after 9/11. Ismail and she sometimes felt like “two foreigners gaping at one another with naked prejudice” (164), but not once does she address the issue of prejudice as directed at them by society. At times there is a vagueness in the narrative; for example, Krista makes a great deal about Ismail’s poverty when she first met him, but soon enough they became a middle-class couple. This transition was effortless despite her assertion that “Ismail’s job always seemed uncertain” (144)?I was also bothered by the portrayal of Ismail. He comes across as almost saintly. He is infinitely patient and understanding, always supportive and forgiving. About the worst that she can say about her husband is that he suffers from halitosis because of fasting during Ramadan. Krista claims that “Ismail insisted on working side by side in the kitchen with the women in his family” (201), but not once is he shown to be doing this; in fact, one of her constant complaints while in Libya was that she was forced to join the women while her husband joined the men. The treatment of Ismail’s family is likewise troubling. The descriptions of them seem sentimentalized. Would a traditional family be so welcoming of the infidel American wife of their “firstborn Muslim son” (108)? Ismail’s sisters are “gracious” and his brothers are “gentle” (118). When something negative is revealed, it tends to be given scant attention. The servitude of Ismail’s youngest sister is mentioned on the first day of the Libyan visit and then never discussed again. The violence of which Ismail’s father is capable is also referred to briefly and then dismissed. The impression is that Krista does not want to draw undue attention to the negative aspects of the culture into which she has married. At times, the same seems to be the case in Krista’s treatment of Islam. She seems to be dismissive of her own beliefs in order to give precedence to Islam. She avoids discussion of the criticisms often made of the religion. She admits to not having “clear convictions” and to being “a part-time Muslim” (272), yet she is reduced to tears at hearing the Qur’an recited in a language she does not understand?The memoir is well-written. It is obvious that the writer has a skill with language. The only thing that was disconcerting was some needless repetition. Gaddafi’s marble bust displayed amongst Roman artifacts is mentioned twice (145, 191); the bag of money brought home by Ismail’s father is mentioned twice (180, 216); the scrambling of children from lap to lap and from the front to the back of a car is also mentioned twice (109, 147). Since I read an advance reading copy, this redundancy may have been corrected.The book provides an interesting perspective on a “mixed” marriage, and Krista must be given credit for her discussion of some very personal topics. She does not hesitate to reveal her own deficiencies, something most people would find difficult to do. Though sometimes uneven in quality, the memoir is a worthwhile read.

[reggieboo · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

This book makes you realize how tough relationships between men and woman of different cultures are. All relationships have there own set of issues but cultural issues are really interesting and challenging. Her thoughts on the way she was raised and our materailistic country values really contrast with those of his family in libya. I really liked this book anf thought it was well written.

[bobbieharv · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

I really enjoyed this book, about a not very religious Christian marrying a very religious Muslim from Libya, and all the cultural differences that ensued. Very engaging, very open, with enough depth and description that you could really feel what it must have been like for her. Especially interesting was the section where they spent time in Libya with his family, where the gender roles are so different. Her writing was very accessible and even beautiful at times, though metaphorically a bit labored, especially toward the end when she's outside pruning: "Hacking away at the fading aftermath of a bygone season, I thought, 'This is my life, a tangle of half-dead relationships and routines, diminishing pleasures, faded habits, and brittle assumptions.'" She's talking about her old life, the inanity of her friends' Facebook postings, etc. Then her husband reads the Qu'ran to her, and "it broke my calcified heart wide open, releasing the floodwater of compassion usually contained by the high dam of my ego."Nice writing, but a little too neat - sounds like a good ending to a book, but one wonders whether those feelings, if real, can be sustained.

[jessibud2 · Rating: 3 out of 5 stars]

This is an early reader copy. The premise of this book is of an American woman who marries Libyan man and how that worked out. I wanted to love this book, because I wanted a happy story, for once, of such a clash of cultures actually succeeding. They do remain married, have 2 children, and as far as I know, they are still together, though not without enormous struggles. But I felt conflicted about this book. Bremer writes well, and does a good job describing places and even her feelings. But I felt her to be inconsistent at times, and quite judgmental for far too long. In the end, she comes to peace with her life, her family and her compromises but, for me, anyhow, it didn't always ring sincere. Still, an interesting read. There were also several typos (misplaced commas, missing words, extra letters) that I hope will be caught and corrected before it is released.

[khiemstra631 · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

I received an Early Reviewer copy of My Accidental Jihad. As other reviewers have stated, it's the story of a young American woman who falls in love with a Libyan man who is 15 years older than her. He is a devout Muslim in some ways, but in other ways seems to want to absorb many of the customs of his adopted country, such as sex before marriage. Her pregnancy precipitates their rush into marriage after a fairly brief acquaintance. She meanwhile, was raised in a very marginally Christian home and seemed to have no grasp of Christianity at all. For example, she could not give him any reasons for why Christmas and Easter are celebrated as they are, citing them as not being spiritual holidays. I was struck as much by her lack of knowledge of her own culture as I was by the difficulties they faced trying to blend their differing perspectives into the unity of a marriage. The book is somewhat episodic rather than linear so things happen out of sequence. However, this really does not interfere with the reader's enjoyment of the book. It is well-written and held my interest throughout. It did strike me as rather curious that the author pretty much ignored the negative characteristics that are associated in western minds with Islam. While there is some mention of prejudices against Muslims, much is glossed over in regard to Muslims treatment of Christians and even other Muslims. It's an interesting story from one author's perspective. I would recommend and will pass my copy along to someone else.

[lynnb_64 · Rating: 3 out of 5 stars]

This is the story of a bi-cultural marriage: an American woman falls in love with a Libyan-born Muslim man 15 years old than her. While they are very connected and falling in love, an unplanned pregnancy leads to marriage a bit sooner than they were prepared for.Ms. Bremer writes well about her relationship and how the cultural and background differences between her and her husband (Ismail) create both challenges and opportunities to better understand each other. She has a keen insight into human nature and society. I wish, though, that she had applied that insight more broadly. Her writings about Islam were all about the spiritual and holy side, with not even a mention about how certain fundamentalists are causing serious troubles in the world, leading to fear and prejudice against all Muslims.I wondered, too, if she was too hard on herself. Many times, she came across as petty and whining; but, then, we didn't hear Ismail's side of things directly. He certainly got his way most of the time. At times, the writing was a bit disjointed...skipping around in time.All in all, I found the book highly readable and thought-provoking, especially about children growing up in a bi-cultural marriage, and about exploring spirituality.

[suzanne81 · Rating: 2 out of 5 stars]

My Accidental Jihad is a book that I really wanted to like but struggled with. The author, an American woman, tells her story of meeting and marrying a Libyan man, and the challenges in reconciling their two cultures. While I give credit to the author for her honesty, she often came across to me as a spoiled American. One chapter that I enjoyed was titled “Bartering”, and in it she writes insightfully about the realities and limitations of “diversity” and “tolerance”, and the assumptions and self-delusions that we bring to our dealings with those who are different. If the rest of the book had been written as well, I would gladly have given it a much higher rating. I had an Advanced Reading copy which also contained some glaring errors.

[bookaddict45 · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

My Accidental Jihad, is not your typical love story. In other words it is not a fairy tale, but rather a realistic love story. It's beauty lies in how least expected the person the author, Krista Bremer falls for is. In fact, the author herself mentions this in her book. She and the man she has fallen for come from two completely different worlds. Their differences are so complex and so vast from having different religious backgrounds to different social status upbringings. The easy way out would be to let these differences be the end of their relationship, instead both parties work towards overcoming these obstacles and loving one another for who they are regardless. I enjoyed reading about Krista's journey to love, and how she grew as a wife, mother, and ultimately human being. There are also some great moments of humor that come when you least expect them, that make the book an even more enjoyable read. Lastly, I admire how honest the author is with her storytelling. She includes her ugly moments and thoughts along with the good and beautiful ones as well. In doing so, she is able to stay true to the title of her book.

[a0squared · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

"My Accidental Jihad" was such a perfect read for me. My mother was born in the United States and raised in a Catholic household while my father was raised Muslim in his homeland of Palestine. I loved the book so much because it precisely reflected the differences in culture that I've witnessed in my parents bicultural marriage. Krista Bremer has such a unique way of analyzing herself. She's so brutally honest about all of her flaws and how her experiences in her marriage gradually shaped her into a better version of herself. I was so mesmerized by her honest descriptions of American culture in contrast to the Arabic culture. The stark differences in culture really put Krista and Ismail's marriage (and even my parent's marriage) into perspective. There were so many enlightening passages in this book that opened my mind to Krista's thought process and internal struggle. I expected there to be a bit more about the prejudices she faced by marrying a Muslim Arab, especially since the media persuades the masses that Muslims are violent, angry, intolerant, oppressing people. I appreciate more so that she elaborated on the peacefulness of Islam and the hospitable nature of it's people. Comparing the Arab hospitality to the unimposing nature of Americans was pure genius! I was truly touched by Krista and Ismail's enduring love for each other despite the huge cultural barriers that they face. I'll definitely be recommending this book to anyone that wants a good love story, wants immense insight on life or to anyone who wants to cast aside the stereotypical Muslim and Arab image that the media imposes upon us and get a real look at their love and generosity.