The Cost of Living: A Working Autobiography

Written by Deborah Levy

Narrated by Henrietta Meire

To strip the wallpaper off the fairy tale of The Family House in which the comfort and happiness of men and children has been the priority is to find behind it an unthanked, unloved, neglected, exhausted woman.

The Cost of Living explores the subtle erasure of women's names, spaces, and stories in the modern everyday. In this "living autobiography" infused with warmth and humor, Deborah Levy critiques the roles that society assigns to us and reflects on the politics of breaking with the usual gendered rituals. What does it cost a woman to unsettle old boundaries and collapse the social hierarchies that make her a minor character in a world not arranged to her advantage?

Levy draws on her own experience of attempting to live with pleasure, value, and meaning-the making of a new kind of family home, the challenges of her mother's death-and those of women she meets in everyday life, from a young female traveler reading in a bar who suppresses her own words while she deflects an older man's advances, to a particularly brilliant student, to a kindly and ruthless octogenarian bookseller who offers the author a place to write at a difficult time in her life. The Cost of Living is urgent, essential reading, a crystalline manifesto for turbulent times.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Highbridge Company
• Release date: Sep 11, 2018
• ISBN: 9781684413690

Deborah Levy

Deborah Levy (Johannesburgo, 1959) es una novelis­ta, poeta y dramaturga británica, que ha sido llevada a escena por la Royal Shakespeare Company. Entre sus libros destacan Beautiful Mutants, Swallowing Geography, The Unloved y Swimming Home and Other Stories, que fue finalista de, entre otros pre­mios, el Man Booker en 2012. Con Leche caliente quedó finalista de los premios Man Booker y Goldsmiths en 2016. Foto © Sheila Burnett

Reviews for The Cost of Living

[tanyaferrell · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

There is just something about Levy's writing absolutely adore. I don't know if I enjoyed this as much as Real Estate but the two books are so different. This one kicks off right after Levy's divorce so it felt like a lot more was happening and there was more movement. I listened to this on audio and read Real Estate on paper, so that may be the difference as well. I didn't feel that the "Cost of Living" theme was tied together completely in this. But the writing is so lovely. And Levy's life is both relatable and aspirational. She talks about her divorce, about the death of her mother, about falling in love with an electric bike, turning a flat into a home, moving into her writing shed, etc, etc. After reading Real Estate, I called out just how clear and crisp the writing is, usually a sign of incredible editing and intention. And, with this book, I was again struck with how intentional Levy is with language. I'm pretty sure she does it in Real Estate as well, but in The Cost of Living, she doesn't name men. They are "my male best friend," "the father of my children," "the man who cried at a funeral." It is such a funny and small but meaningful thing to do. I love it.

[kcshankd · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

Not typically a book I would choose, but I wanted to give TOC a try. A memoir of a 50-year old woman who is going through the end of a twenty year long marriage, the death of her mother, and the fledging of her daughters. I generally avoid memoirs unless they are from extraordinary people or events, and this is neither. I still am glad I read it, and look forward to ordering TOC #2 shortly.

[carrie_etter · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

Exquisitely written memoir of finding new life after a marriage ends.

[benkline · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

A very raw, personal, take on a life after marriage, in a very feminist perspective. Very powerful, very engrossing, and each 'essay' or 'short story' led into the next. Definitely enlightening to men I think, and how we come off to women, in situations where we don't understand ourselves - and more importantly - how we don't understand women.

I did think it was interesting, and most likely purposeful, how she mentions that men don't give names to their wives. This changes for the first (and only time) when Nadia enters her life. But what I think is interesting about this; is how she never once lists a male's name in this book. A few nicknames given, but "the man who cried at the funeral" , "my best male friend", etc.

[miss.mesmerized · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

Bücher von Deborah Levy, in denen die Autorin ihr Leben und ihre Erlebnisse zum Thema macht, sind nie leicht zu fassen und zu rezensieren. So auch „Was das Leben kostet“, in dem sie die Trennung von ihrem Ehemann und den Tod ihrer Mutter verarbeitet. War es in „Was ich nicht wissen will“ noch die Sprachlosigkeit, aus der sie einen Ausweg sucht, sind es nun die plötzlich entstehenden Lücken, die sie füllen muss. Ein neues Heim, das nicht heimelig werden will; die Definition des Ich, das nicht mehr (nur) Gattin und Mutter ist, sondern Frau in einer Welt, die scheinbar viel zu sehr von misogynen Männern dominiert wird; der Tod der Mutter und die darauf folgende Orientierungslosigkeit – mit dem Schreiben verarbeitet sie ihre Emotionen und die Suche nach Struktur und Sinn im neuen Dasein.Vor allem ihre Begegnungen mit Männern haben beim Lesen einen ausgesprochenen Reiz. Womöglich übt sie eine besondere Anziehungskraft auf diejenigen Exemplare aus, die in einem - positiv formuliert – traditionellen Weltbild gefangen sind und Frauen nur als dekoratives Element wahrnehmen und denen jeder Horizont fehlt, das Gegenüber als gleichwertigen Gesprächs- und Lebenspartner anzuerkennen. Ohne Frage hat der gesellschaftliche Wandel, den die Frauen im 20. Jahrhundert erstritten haben, nicht jeden erreicht und stellt so manchen Mann vor große Herausforderungen, wenn an ihrem Weltbild gerüttelt wird und sie sich nicht in der Rolle wiederfinden, die sie sich qua Geschlecht zuschreiben.Aber auch ihr Fahrrad, symbolisches Kampfmittel, an und mit dem sie ihre Wut und Energie zu kanalisieren versucht, nimmt eine interessante Rolle ein. Die neugewonnene Freiheit durch den Elektroantrieb ermöglicht die Mobilität im chronisch verstopften London bei gleichzeitig allen damit verbundenen Nachteilen wie erfrorene Finger im Winter und dem mühsamen Transport der Einkäufe. Aber es ist auch das Gerät, das ihr als Person die Schau stiehlt und die Aufmerksamkeit von Männern auf sich zieht.„Freiheit ist nie umsonst. Wer je um Freiheit gerungen hat, weiß, was sie kostet.“Als Kind ist Deborah Levy mit ihren Eltern aus Südafrika geflüchtet, nun flüchtet sie mit Anfang 50 aus dem Leben in Ehe und steht wieder vor dem Neuanfang und dem Aufbau nicht nur einer Ordnung, sondern auch des eigenen Ichs. Die Introspektion durch die Personalisierung des eigenen Ichs im Schreiben erlaubt es ihr, auch kritische und angreifbare Gedanken zu verbalisieren und ihr Leben neu zu strukturieren. Ein harter und steiniger, aber interessanter Weg, dem man als Leser gerne folgt.

[c_why · Rating: 3 out of 5 stars]

Bits of exciting & tender writing, buried within words that didn't connect with me, nor, seemeingly, with itself (IMHO). I have been very disappointed in this much-touted author. This is the first one I've actually finished.

[froxgirl · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

There's great pleasure in this quirky and brief (134 pages) narrative of a woman's life after her marriage goes under. She finds a new place to live, a sixth floor walkup; rides an e-bike (electric); sets up her writing space in an unheated wreck of a garden shed; and reminds herself daily that her marriage was not worth extraordinary rescue efforts. It's like hanging out with a new Brit friend who's a fantastic storyteller - you're just swept along into her everyday life, which is rendered bright and shining by her rueful words. The opening line sets the tone: "As Orson Welles told us, if we want a happy ending, it depends on where we stop the story."Quotes: "I will never stop grieving for my long-held wish for enduring love that does not reduce its major players to something less than they are.""To separate from love is to live a risk-free life. To live without love is a waste of time.""When a father does the things he needs to do in the world, we understand it is his due. If a mother does the things she needs to do in the world, we feel she has abandoned us. It is a miracle to survive our mixed messages, written in society's most poison ink.""I realized that was what I wanted after my mother's death. More life. I somehow thought she would die and still be alive. I would like to think she is somewhere in that distant sound that resembles the sea in which she taught me to swim, but she is not there."