TIME

How to respond to an insult, according to therapists

Have you ever been stunned into silence by an insult—only to think of the perfect witty comeback two hours too late?

Of course you have, and there’s a physiological reason why. “When someone says something offensive or harmful that hurts us or hurts a member of a community that’s really important to us, our nervous system can get activated,” says Kerry McBroome, a psychologist in Brooklyn.

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