Academics and researchers in relationships often face what is known as “the two-body problem,” in which they struggle to find positions for both people at either the same institution, or institutions that are close to each other. I also have a two-body problem, except neither of the bodies is mine. The bodies belong to my toddler and my infant, and the options for transporting both at the same time, as well as all of their ever-multiplying stuff, are limited.