Loving someone who drinks too much or suffers from addiction can feel like your relationship is a roller coaster. One day your partner is loving and kind and the next moment they are sick and angry. It can be a lot. Does that mean you are helpless? No way. Here are 5 tips to show this disease that you are not powerless. 1. Put on some great music. Maybe it’s classical, pop, or worship music. Whatever your choice, just turn it on and crank up the volume. And then - here's the secret - dance! When life gets a little too serious around my house, I put on some Justin Timberlake, call the kids into the room, and we have a dance party. If it’s dark outside we turn off all the lights and take out the emergency flashlights and dance in the dark with beams of lights flashing everywhere. It’s a great way to let it all go, burn some calories, and laugh. Everyone gets to pick one or two songs. Dancing while standing on the coffee table or couch is totally encouraged. If anyone starts dancing in a bad mood, by the third song they are all giggles and joy! 2. Surround yourself with great food. Make a trip to the store, meet a friend at your favorite restaurant, or cook a recipe from a good cookbook. Warm chocolate chip cookies, a green smoothie, or a gooey pizza can change the course of your day. Leave bowls of healthy nuts on the kitchen table and arrange some fresh apples and pears by your fridge. Research the best brownie recipe you can find and make a batch for you and one for your neighbors. Food heals, so enjoy it and take precious care of your body and what you put in it. Here's one of my favorite comfort food recipes for bolognese. 3. Pray. Get on some cozy yoga pants and a soft t-shirt. Grab your Bible and have a seat in the most comfortable chair and spend some time with the one who promises to bring you joy when you worship Him (Psalm 16:18). Grab a bottled water and a warm cup of something delicious. Take some time out of your busy day to find hope and direction. Meditate. If you’re not sure how to start, here’s two great articles with some simple directions: How to Meditate Meditation: Learning to Think of God 4. Get out of the house and walk or run. Put on a great podcast (have you tried the Wife of an Alcoholic podcast?) and fill your mind with inspiration. Just thirty minutes a day will do wonders for your spirit and body. When I am walking, I try to look around at all the beauty surrounding me. I look at the architecture of homes I'm passing, the beauty of the trees, the smile of a child riding by on her bike. I try to fill my heart by taking my eyes off my problems and reminding myself of all the goodness surrounding me. 5. Clean. Sometimes when we feel out of control on the inside, we need to clean on the outside. Simplify your life by throwing away 25 things a day for a week. That sounds like a lot, doesn’t it? You would be amazed at how much junk you have been storing. Is that junk serving a purpose other than cluttering up your life?   Organize your closets. Get rid of all the "stuff" in your home that's not giving you joy and is instead weighing you down. If 25 things doesn't sound possible, start with 5. Walk around with a big trash bag and have the courage to say, "I don’t need this anymore, so I am removing it from my life." Be decisive. It’s a great habit to get into. From that point on, for every one thing you bring into your life, give away something else. There is only so much room in our homes and we should not fill it with stuff we will never use. Marie Kondo, the author of The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up, says it perfectly in her book: “We come up with all kinds of reasons for not discarding things, such as ‘I didn’t use this particular pot all year, but who knows, I might need it sometime.’ But when we really delve into the reasons for why we can’t let something go, there are only two: an attachment to the past or a fear of the future.” It’s time to face your past and get excited about your future