Ross Patterson, Dan Hollaway and Jessie Wiseman bring you the realest fake news of the week with the possible government mandate of the coronavirus vaccine when it becomes available, Joe Biden anoints Donald Trump with the new nickname “President Tweety”, US scientists breed a human-chimera hybrid to aid in growing organs for transplants, US birth rates fall to record lows due to financial instability, a Columbian company is offering to make cardboard coffins if things take a turn for the worse, and Kamala Harris introduces a resolution to make phrases like “Wuhan Virus” hate speech.