Episode 4: Masquerade: Southwest Cougars Freshman Year, #4

By Tamara Hart Heiner

Cassie goes through an identity crisis when her relationship with Ben hits the rocks, and she feels a lot of it is her fault. She puts on a brave face and pretends to fit in while she struggles to understand herself and her desires. What will it take for her to be the person she wants to be? What will she need to do to have the relationships she longs for? Not even her closest friends seem to recognize and accept her for who she is, and Cassie needs to find an inner strength to make it through each day.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Tamara Heiner
• Release date: Mar 26, 2024
• ISBN: 9798215894538

Tamara Hart Heiner

Tamara Hart Heiner lives in Arkansas with her husband, four kids, a cat, a rabbit, and several fish. She would love to add a macaw and a sugar glider to the family collection. She graduated with a degree in English and an editing emphasis from Brigham Young University. She's been an editor for BYU-TV and currently works as an editor for WiDo Publishing and as a freelancer. She's the author of the young adult suspense series, PERILOUS, INEVITABLE, the CASSANDRA JONES saga, and a nonfiction book about the Joplin tornado, TORNADO WARNING. 

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Episode 4: Masquerade

CHAPTER ONE

English Girl

Cassie woke up Friday morning with a horrible canker sore in her mouth.

She winced at breakfast as she tried to eat her toast, and brushing her teeth was grueling. She moved the brush gingerly around the sore on her lip, feeling like it was an ineffective cleaning job. How could she go to school like this?

Why are you talking funny? Andrea asked in first hour.

Canker sore, Cassie said, trying to keep her lip away from her teeth while she spoke. It hurts to talk.

Andrea laughed. You sound like you have an accent.

Cassie grumbled under her breath and tried to focus on her class assignment. After class, she stopped by Coach Benson’s desk and got her homework for the next week.

Don’t cause any trouble at Disney World, he teased, handing her a thick packet.

I won’t, she said, thumbing through the assignments. Especially not if every teacher gave her this much homework.

Mrs. Jones texted at lunch. Your contacts arrived. I’ll pick you up after school to get them.

Yes! Cassie did a fist pump and gave a little squeal. Finally, she would have blue eyes!

My contacts are here! she told her friends at lunch.

Why are you talking funny? Maureen asked.

She’s got a cold sore, Andrea giggled.

You got a cold sore? Amity gasped. People get those from kissing too much.

Canker sore, Cassie growled. Anyway. I’ve got my contacts!

When do we get to see you in them? Amity asked. Don’t you leave for Florida tomorrow?

Cassie nodded. You could come over.

Okay. I’ll ask my mom.

I’m so jealous you’re going to Florida, Janice said. I wish I could come.

I wish you could too! Cassie said. It would be so much fun! Instead of being surrounded by her friends, she’d have to deal with her siblings for an entire week.

But by the end of the day, all Cassie could think about was her contacts. She could barely contain her excitement. As if going to Disney World wasn’t enough, now she got to have new colored contacts!

She tapped her fingers on her thighs as her mom drove her to the eye clinic. I can’t wait.

What’s wrong with your mouth?

Cassie rolled her eyes. She’d heard this question all day. Canker sore.

Ah. You must be excited. I get canker sores when I’m stressed or excited.

Cassie suspected all she’d done was poke her lip with the tooth brush, but that took too many words to say, and speaking was painful, so all she did was nod.

Okay, we’re here. Let’s check this out.

Mrs. Jones did the talking while Cassie tried to imagine how she’d look with blue eyes. Exotic. Dark skin, dark hair, and crystalline, piercing blue eyes. The kind people couldn’t help but notice.

Here we are, Cassie, Jen the assistant said, leading Cassie back to the lighted room. Let’s make sure these fit you.

She opened the box and deposited the contacts into little dishes.

They don’t look blue, Cassie said, studying the grayish color on the lens.

That’s just the water. Wait till you get them on.

Cassie hoped she was right. She took out the contacts she was wearing and slipped on the colored ones. Then she opened her eyes and looked in the mirror. A sigh escaped her lips. They’re gray.

Both the assistant and her mother leaned over to peer at her.

They’re definitely gray, Mrs. Jones said.

Hmm. We must have put down the wrong color.

We. As if Cassie had been the one to order the lenses. These aren’t the ones I want. She took them out of her eyes and put her regular ones back in, her chest heavy with disappointment. After all these days of waiting for them to arrive, and the contacts were the wrong color.

It’s a lovely gray, the assistant said.

She paid three hundred dollars for blue lenses, Mrs. Jones said.

Yes, of course. Jen boxed the lenses back up. I’ll send these right back and get new ones ordered. Blue this time. I’ll have them here by Tuesday at the latest.

We’ll be out of town, Mrs. Jones said. We leave tomorrow.

No problem. I’ll have them waiting at the desk for you when you get back from your trip.

Cassie turned to her mom. So I won’t get them until after Thanksgiving? It felt silly to cry over something like this, but she wanted them now!

Mrs. Jones hesitated. Well, we could have them delivered to my sister’s house in Georgia. That’s where we’ll be for Thanksgiving.

Cassie brightened, hopeful again. Oh yeah! Can we?

I’ll ask my sister.

*~*

They didn’t have the right color, Cassie told Amity on the phone that evening. So there’s no point in coming over to see them.

That’s too bad. Well, have a great time in Florida. We’ll miss you.

I’ll miss you guys, too.

Cassie hung up the phone and surveyed the huge pile of homework she was bringing. It was like her teachers didn’t know she’d be on vacation.

She wanted to say Ben would miss her also, but he’d never even called her back. The days of him missing her seemed long past.

She picked the phone up and tried calling him one last time. She held back a sigh when his mom answered. Is Ben home? she asked.

No, he’s not. Can I take a message?

Why was he never home? Why wasn’t he returning her calls? None of this sat right. It’s just Cassie again. Just tell him to call me.

Okay, I will.

Cassie put away the phone, wishing she hadn’t called at all.

*~*

Cassie alternated between sleeping and reading on the drive to Florida. She spent a decent amount of time texting, also, though her friends didn’t seem as bored as she was and didn’t respond quite so quickly. It wasn’t until a day later that Mr. Jones pulled the van into the same camping resort where they’d stayed last time.

No tent, Cassie said.

Yeah, we got rained on last time, Emily agreed.

That’s fine, Mrs. Jones said, emptying the van of food and suitcases. We got the big RV this time. It has two bedrooms. The girls can have one room and Scott can have the table-bed.

Cassie grabbed her suitcase. A smile touched her lips when she walked inside, though she didn’t let it grow too big because it hurt her mouth. She had so many nostalgic memories of these RV houses. She followed Emily into the bedroom at the foot of the RV. It was only big enough for a bed, which she and her sisters would be sharing. A few cupboards lined the walls above.

This is so fun! Annette said, coming in behind.

The fun part is tomorrow, Cassie said. This is just the arriving.

They helped unpack the van. Cassie had promised Ms. Malcolm she’d memorize the words to her Christmas song, so she spent the evening doing that. Mr. Jones called the family to the kitchen for a quick meeting.

Tomorrow we’ll hit Magic Kingdom, and on Tuesday we’ll do EPCOT. Wednesday and Thursday we’ll just hang around the camping resort, so you kids can plan those days for homework. Cassie. Mr. Jones looked directly at her. I know you’ve been trying to get your book done to resubmit to the publisher. Why don’t we work on it together this week?

To be perfectly honest, she had mostly forgotten about her book. She nodded. Yeah, that’s a good idea.

And then Friday, as long as it’s not too cold, we’ll do the water park.

Let’s hope it’s warm! Emily said. Last time was miserable!

We won’t go if it’s cold like that, Mrs. Jones said.

The next morning was chaos as Mr. Jones shouted orders and urged them out of the RV so they could catch the early monorail to the Magic Kingdom.

We don’t want to waste a single minute! The tickets cost the same whether we’re there all day or for just an hour!

Cassie thought she was too old to get excited about Disney, but her anticipation grew the closer they got to the park. Iconic Disney characters smiled from road signs with fingers and arrows pointing the way. We’re going, Cassie thought in silent acknowledgment to them.

The weather was breezy but pleasant. Not exactly warm, but definitely not cold. Even though they’d hurried, by the time they got to the front gate, a long line had formed.

Where do we want to go first? Mr. Jones asked.

Space Mountain! Emily said. My favorite.

Everyone listed one of their Must-Sees except Cassie, whose attention had been attracted elsewhere. A boy walked by in a baseball cap, looking so much like Ben that her chest squeezed. She took a step closer, ready to call out, when he turned his head. Not him. She shook her head. Quit being silly, she mumbled.

They split up inside, with Emily and Cassie standing in the one-hour line to ride Space Mountain. The line shuffled forward inch by inch. The walls and hallways were covered with astronaut trivia and things to look at, but that wasn’t as exciting as being on the ride. Cassie checked her phone, trying not to wish Ben would call. Did he still like her? At least forty minutes had crept by.

I hope it’s as fun as I remember it being, Emily said.

Better be, after this long line, Cassie said with a laugh.

A boy in front of them turned around. He had to be about their age, and Cassie eyed him as he looked her over.

Are you English? he asked.

Wasn’t that obvious? How many people spoke English if they