Steph, Tears of Secrets

By Tanya A Guinness

Steph’s life is thrown into turmoil when her past catches up with her. All the abuse she tried to hide, she is now forced to confront. Will she be mentally strong enough to survive a court case? Her heart is confused, unsure who to turn to and who to trust, doubting herself and her choices. How will Steph, with her ambition to further her career, manage to protect her family? Brett and Keith had always helped her in her past. Can her biker friends save Steph again, or will trouble just follow them? Elizabeth was growing up with questions about her father. All the secrets Steph had tried to protect her daughter from are they secrets no more? Can Elizabeth handle the truth? Or will losing her best friend push her over the edge? Brett and Steph share one last night before Brett disappears on the run from the law. Adrien and Steph’s friendship grows stronger as they raise Steph’s new daughter, Stacey. With more secrets, will Stacey ever know the identity of her birth father? Will Steph ever find her true love? Will she ever see Brett again?

• Language: English
• Publisher: Austin Macauley Publishers
• Release date: Feb 2, 2024
• ISBN: 9781528995481

Tanya A Guinness

Tanya A Guinness grew up in Coffs Harbour on the mid-north coast of New South Wales, Australia. For the last 25 years, Tanya has lived in Sydney, where she raised her two children and is now enjoying her grandchildren. Tanya has worked as a Learning Support Officer at a Sydney High School for the last twenty years, which she still enjoys. She has been involved with Musical Theatre for over 30 years. Tanya’s favourite hobby is playing her drums, listening to music, and going to the theatre. This is Tanya’s second novel, a sequel to Brett: ‘Love of My Life’.

Book preview

Chapter 1

All the theatre people had drinks at the local pub, so many turned up with familiar faces from past shows. Graham was well-liked and respected. It was a sad and emotional day full of happy memories.

Adrien was drinking way too much as usual and flirting shamelessly with Stephen, who had been cast in ‘The Best Little Whore House in Texas’ show a few years ago. Adrien didn’t think much of him back then; incredible how time changes peoples perspectives.

John was catching up with Mitch and Tracey. They were just organising a new show, ‘Man of La Mancha’. Mitch was rather excited about directing his first musical. Adrien planned on auditioning; he hadn’t performed in a show for months, so he was looking forward to doing some theatre time.

Steph was very quiet. She had an uneasy feeling like someone was watching her, it gave her the creeps. She walked over to John and grabbed hold of his arm.

Are you ok? he asked.

I’ve got a bit of a headache, I think I should go home, she said, still feeling on edge.

John drove them home and made her a cup of tea. Steph changed out of her black funeral dress, as she called it, and got comfortable on the sofa with John.

Brett was packing his gear up. He had been staying with Steph for two weeks. Brett was going home to Queensland the following morning; he was not a city man at all. Brett didn’t go to the funeral, as Brett had never met Graham. Graham had died before Brett arrived, which was the opening night of Steph’s new show.

What am I going to do without Graham, Steph said with sadness.

You’ve still got me, said John. However, that didn’t seem to comfort Steph.

Then she looked at Brett. What was she going to do without Brett? Watching him pack, Steph realised she didn’t want him to leave. Steph sensed John still had uneasy feelings about Brett, so she kept that to herself.

John put his arm around Steph, trying to comfort her.

I know, we’re all going to miss Graham, said John knowing he had lost a great mate.

After a while, Adrien came home alone and very drunk. He was supposed to be going to Melbourne in the morning. He will be so hungover for his flight, Steph thought. He made himself a coffee and joined John and Steph in the lounge room, and it wasn’t long before Brett joined them. He had his bag packed ready for the morning.

Steph should be so happy her life was complete. She had Brett back in her life, her first true love, although Brett was returning to Queensland in the morning. Adrien, who was her best friend, had lived with Steph and her daughter, Elizabeth, since Elizabeth was two, over eleven years now. Adrien was her rock whom she could lean on and was always there for Steph, her best friend.

Then John, who loved Steph, and she loved him; at least Steph thought she did. John was a great drummer; he had his own band and was always travelling around doing gigs. They had plenty of work, which suited Steph as she was busy writing another show and hated feeling guilty for not giving John more attention.

Steph’s Musical ‘Brett, Love of My Life’ opened two weeks ago and was a huge success. The musical would be opening for 28 more shows with talk of it going overseas to London’s Westend.

Elizabeth was in her first year of high school and doing well.

Life was just perfect, and that was scaring the crap out of Steph. She had a horrible feeling something didn’t feel right. She tried to share her worry with John, but he just thought she was going to miss him.

Enjoy the peace while it lasts. You should get started on your next musical. After tomorrow you and Elizabeth will have the house to yourselves until Adrien gets back from Melbourne, said John.

Steph just nodded, unable to lose that bad feeling, but she said no more about it.

The following day, Adrien and Brett had left for the airport. Their flights were leaving almost at the same time but going in different directions. Twice a year, Adrien went to visit his brother in Melbourne. Steph was a little sad to see them both go but looking forward to having time to herself. She needed time to think, and listening to her Queen records helped her reflect on her dreams; this was Steph’s way. The music helped her with writing and cleared her mind, so the words could flow.

Elizabeth was back at school on Monday, and she had just returned home after having a sleepover at her best friend Kelly’s house. She was upstairs doing her homework. A good time to start on that new musical, Steph thought.

John had a three-week gig up the coast and was getting ready to head off for that. He still had his home, although he spent most nights at Steph’s. All his gear was at his place, so John was at home packing his van, getting ready to leave. He had already said goodbye to Steph.

Steph was glad John was going away. She still had doubts about her feelings for John. Even though Brett has gone, he still held her heart, but she knew she could never have him. Brett was never going to stay in the city, and Steph would never leave.

Steph was cleaning up after breakfast, thinking how quiet the house was as she hadn’t been on her own for the longest time.

I’m going to enjoy this time to myself, she thought, making herself a cup of tea and getting ready to sit down to make a start on her next show. She had a lot of great ideas.

Suddenly her thoughts were interrupted with a knock at the door. Steph quickly went to open it, thinking John must have forgotten something; he’s been very forgetful lately.

Oh my God! It was like time stood still. The terror raced through Steph like a horror movie that had come to life. There before her stood Shane, her ex-husband.

Oh my God, how did he find me? Steph’s mind was full of sheer terror. Shane pushed her inside and closed the door behind him. It happened so fast.

Steph froze like a frightened child, not knowing what to do. My God, Elizabeth was upstairs. I need to get him out! She had a million thoughts that raced through her mind.

What do you want? Steph said, trembling and terrified, trying to keep calm.

Shane pulled out a gun and pointed it at her. Absolute terror ran through Steph.

I knew I would find you one day, yelled Shane. Where’s Elizabeth?

Steph was trying to think fast, hoping to God Elizabeth stayed upstairs.

She’s not here, said Steph fearing Shane would pull that trigger as she pleaded with him. Please put the gun away. Can’t we just talk? My flatmate will be home any minute, Steph said, trying to figure out what to do. She was trembling, walking backwards and moving away from him, trying to make it to the back door. Shane kept walking towards her.

You’re my fuckin wife, and you stole my fuckin daughter, said Shane. He was so angry, like a mad man. Steph knew she couldn’t reason with him.

Elizabeth, who was in her room, heard the shouting and made her way to the top of the stairs trying to listen. Not sure what was going on, she cautiously peered down the stairs.

Steph had made her way to the kitchen, hoping Elizabeth remained upstairs. Every terrifying memory Steph recalled of Shane was racing through her, paralysing her. He always said he would kill her if she left him. Her last thought was to head for the door. She didn’t want Shane to find Elizabeth.

You don’t deserve to live. You’re just a useless piece of shit.

BANG! Shane pulled the trigger. As the sound of the gun rang loudly, Steph could feel herself falling as she hit the floor. She laid there, feeling herself fading.

Elizabeth jumped with fright and ran back to her room; hiding under her bed, too terrified to make a sound.

Shane stood over Steph, aimed the gun at her head and pulled the trigger, ‘click’ this time and nothing happened. He only had one bullet. Shane looked at Steph, bleeding as she lay there dying, pleased with himself. He walked out the front door, leaving Steph lying there unconscious, blood coming through her top.

Shane walked up the street, got in his car and drove off.

John drove right past Shane and pulled up outside. He had his van packed, ready for his trip. He had already said goodbye to Steph but had forgotten his favourite jacket.

He approached the front door, wondering why it was left wide open. Walking in, he called out.

Hello, Steph. You left the door wide open. No sign of her, he headed up the stairs to grab his jacket. Still no sign of her, he went back downstairs towards the kitchen. There on the floor, Steph laid unconscious, covered in blood.

Oh my God! Steph. John knelt next to her; there was blood everywhere. He grabbed the tea towel to try to stop the bleeding. Then he grabbed the phone from the wall and dialled triple 0, I need an ambulance, urgently! He checked for a pulse, but there was none. He then started CPR.

John was still doing CPR when the ambulance arrived.

They took over. John sat back, watching them work on Steph. He was shaking as reality started to catch up with him. John had Steph’s blood all over him. That’s when he noticed Elizabeth halfway down the stairs. He went to reassure her with his arms out.

Are you ok? Elizabeth was crying.

Did you see who did this? John asked. Elizabeth just shook her head.

What happened? Is Mum dead? Elizabeth cried.

John put his arms around her holding her tight.

I have a pulse, John heard one of the paramedics say.

Oh, thank God. Your mum is going to be ok, John said with a sigh of relief. I need to ring Adrien, he thought. John sent Adrien a message on his work pager. A few minutes later, Adrien called back.

John, what’s up? We just got to the airport.

Adrien, it’s Steph. She has been shot. Someone shot her. There’s so much blood. I don’t know who did it. You have to come back; they’re taking her to Saint Vincent’s. John hung up the phone, leaving blood on the receiver.

They had Steph on the gurney, pushing her out to the ambulance. She was unconscious with a breathing tube pumping air into her lungs to keep her alive. She didn’t look like she would make it, John thought as he tried to keep it together, still holding on to Elizabeth.

Elizabeth sat in the front of the ambulance with John in the back as the sirens rang out. The ambulance raced towards the hospital.

John, still in shock, was sitting in a waiting room with his face in his hands. He had blood all over his shirt. Elizabeth just sat there, not saying a word.

Steph was already in surgery when Adrien and Brett arrived at the hospital. A nurse showed them to the waiting room where John and Elizabeth were sitting, very distressed. Elizabeth ran straight to Adrien’s comforting arms.

John, where’s Steph? What happened? said Adrien, who was beside himself.

John looked up at Adrien and Brett, his eyes all bloodshot and teary. He had been trying to keep it together for Elizabeth’s sake, but he was never so glad to see Adrien.

Steph’s been shot. Someone shot her. Who would do such a thing? said John. Adrien sat down next to John, still holding on to Elizabeth. They were all in shock. Brett stood back very quiet as they waited.

Who would do such a thing? Adrien thought. Steph would never hurt anybody.

Chapter 2

Brett remembered years ago, his mate Keith had told him that he had run into Shane, Steph’s ex. Shane had told Keith that Steph had run out on him. Shane was furious and out for revenge.

One day, I’ll find her, and she will wish she was dead, he told Keith. Brett had never forgotten that. Keith, concerned at the time, had told Brett. It wasn’t long before Shane had a new girlfriend, who had moved in with him. So, he had never thought about it until now. Could it have been Shane? Could he have found her? Brett thought. It had been eleven years since Steph had left him.

Adrien, John and Brett all sat in the waiting room. Elizabeth had fallen asleep with her head on Adrien’s lap.

Who would want to shoot Steph? thought Adrien, racking his brain trying to think. Was it a robbery? Adrien was desperately trying to understand all this. Who could have done this? Shaking his head with no answers.

John just held his head in disbelief about everything, still covered in blood.

If I hadn’t come back to get my jacket, he might have tried to kill Elizabeth too, John said, looking at her. He put his hands back over his face.

Did you see anyone? Anyone running down the street? Did you notice anything unusual? Adrien asked, desperate to make sense of this whole thing and find out who did this.

The door was wide open, said John reliving the morning. When I came back, I yelled out for Steph, but she didn’t answer. I ran upstairs to get my jacket, but she wasn’t there. I came back down to the kitchen, and there she was, laying on the floor, John said so calmly. I thought she was dead. Elizabeth was upstairs. She must have been hiding. She would have heard the gunshot, John said, trembling.

Just then, two police officers walked in; they wanted to talk to John because he was the one who found Steph. They wanted to speak to Elizabeth as well.

But Adrien being very protective said, She didn’t see anything. He would always protect her.

The police asked, Do you know of anyone who would have wanted to harm Stephanie? Adrien and John had no idea; they both shook their heads.

Steph has no enemies. She wouldn’t hurt anybody, said John.

John went over what he had just told Adrien, telling the police. They wanted John to come down to the police station to do a formal interview. John didn’t want to leave until he knew Steph was ok.

The police asked if anyone was acting strange or had been following her or anything unusual. They both said, No, nothing.

Brett, still quiet, was sitting there wondering if Shane could have been capable of doing this.

Steph was in surgery for five hours. The bullet had punctured a lung, just missing her heart, and she had lost a lot of blood.

It was late afternoon when the doctor finally came out to talk to them, The surgery went well, and now we have to wait. The next 24 hours will tell us more. Stephanie was fortunate that you got her here as quickly as you did, even five minutes longer, could have been a different story, said the doctor.

Can we see her? John asked, desperate to see her.

Stephanie will be in recovery for an hour and then transferred to intensive care. You will be able to see her then, said the doctor.

Well, she survived the surgery. Steph’s a fighter. She’ll pull through, Adrien said, reassuring Elizabeth.

John just nodded, trying to be as confident as Adrien. Brett still not saying anything.

They all decided to go down to the cafe’ on the first floor for a coffee since they couldn’t see Steph for an hour. None of them had had any lunch, not that they felt like eating. Adrien ordered some hot chips for Elizabeth. She must be starving, he thought.

Sitting in the coffee shop, Adrien looked at Brett, only just noticing how quiet he was. When Elizabeth went to the bathroom, Adrien questioned.

Brett, you haven’t said much. Do you have any idea who could have done this to Steph?

John and Adrien both looking at Brett, waiting for an answer. Brett wasn’t sure if he should say anything, I don’t know for sure, but Steph’s ex-husband Shane had said years ago that he would find her one day and kill her, said Brett, feeling guilty like it was his fault for not protecting her.

But he didn’t know where she was? Adrien said, questioning again. She had changed her name, and he couldn’t have known that, could he?

John was starting to feel like an outsider. What are you talking about? said John.

Adrien looked at John, not sure where to begin. Steph and Elizabeth ran away from Shane, her ex-husband, years ago. He was very abusive to Steph and she feared for Elizabeth’s safety. So, she changed her last name when she moved to Sydney, said Adrien.

Yeah, but I found her, said Brett with anger building up. He was starting to believe his thoughts about Shane could be true. Who else could have done this? Brett asked himself. It had to be him.

John was a bit flabbergasted, trying to take all this in.

I think she only told me because she needed to tell someone, said Adrien, trying to console John. He was getting all riled up.

Don’t discuss this in front of Elizabeth. She doesn’t know anything, said Adrien seeing her walk towards them. Let’s keep it that way.

They finished their coffee’s and went back upstairs to see Steph. She had been moved to intensive care now.

The nurse said, Only two visitors at a time.

John and Adrien went in first.

She looked so fragile lying there hooked up to machines that were keeping her alive. John held her hand as he leaned over to kiss her. Adrien went around the other side of the bed.

Hey, Steph, you get yourself well. We need you here, said Adrien kissing her on the forehead, trying to keep himself together. He went out to give John some privacy and told Brett he could go in.

Elizabeth wanted to see her mother. Adrien thought it might be too hard for Elizabeth, but she needed to know her mum would be ok.

Brett walked into Steph’s room, and all his nightmares had returned. Brett thought about Sally, who was like a sister to him and his mum, who were both murdered a long time ago. They were all dead, and now he could lose Steph. This time he was going to do something.

Brett kissed Steph and whispered in her ear, I’m going to get Shane. You just hang in there. I’ll take care of everything.

Brett walked out of the hospital with only one thought on his mind; that he was going to find Shane and stop him from ever hurting anyone ever again. He was sure it was Shane that tried to kill Steph.

Chapter 3

Adrien saw Brett leave with a stern look on his face. He went back into Steph’s room with Elizabeth this time.

Where’s Brett going? Adrien whispered to John.

I don’t know, he whispered something to Steph and left. John didn’t care but Adrien was worried. He knew a little about what Brett had been through in his youth. Steph had told him about his mother’s death and his best mate’s sister, who was like a sister to Brett. They were both murdered years ago, he didn’t know all the details, but Steph told him that Brett had never recovered from the trauma of losing them.

Elizabeth had tears she was trying to hold back. Adrien had his arm around her. He was the closest to a father that Elizabeth had ever known.

You can hold her hand, let her know you’re here, he said; but Elizabeth just couldn’t. She hugged Adrien and cried for her mother.

They sat there in silence for a while. The nurses came to check on Steph; still no change they said.

Elizabeth was sitting there watching her mother. She was very close to Adrien. She was barely two when he had moved in with them. He worried about what this could do to Elizabeth if she found out what her father may have done. Elizabeth must never know. Adrien thought they needed to be careful about what they said around her.

Your mum’s going to be fine, said Adrien trying not to cry himself. You better be okay, he thought. She’s a tough cookie, he said, trying to reassure himself.

Brett had flown back up to the coast, and he found himself knocking on a familiar door.

Brett, shit, what are you doing here? said Keith, happy to see him.

They gave each other a welcome hug and they sat down with a cold beer like old times. Keith hadn’t seen Brett in at least ten years. They were once like brothers. Brett told Keith he had been in Sydney with Steph.

Scratching his head, Keith asked, What possessed you to go find Steph? I thought you both had finally got your lives worked out?

Brett said how sorry he was for asking Keith to lie for him all those years ago. At the time, he thought he was doing the right thing. He had a lot of regrets about things in his past and needed to stop hiding from them.

Brett filled Keith in on Steph’s success with her musical and said that everything had been going great in her life, but now she was in the hospital fighting for her life. Someone had shot her. Keith’s face turned grey.

Keith got up to get the local paper, and there on the front page was a picture of Shane. Brett had so much anger raging through him.

Shane’s girlfriend Michelle was found dead in their home two days ago. She had been shot. Keith passed Brett the newspaper, Shane’s on the run, for murder, said Keith.

Brett’s prime focus now was to find Shane. He knew Shane had shot Steph and he couldn’t get away with it. He had to stop him.

Brett had chills. He could still get to Steph if he finds out she’s not dead.

I need to call Adrien, he said.

Brett reached for the phone and called the hospital, telling Adrien everything.

It was Shane, he shot his girlfriend. He killed her, and he tried to kill Steph. I know it was him. You need to let the police know, and they need to protect Steph and Elizabeth. I don’t know where Shane is but I’m going to find him. said Brett. He had to protect them no matter what; he had to find Shane and stop him.

Now Adrien was in shock. He didn’t want to upset Elizabeth any more than she already was. He looked at her curled up on the chair asleep next to John. As he hung up the phone, he reached into his pocket and pulled out the card the detective had given him.

Adrien asked the nurse if there was a private phone he could use, he didn’t want to risk Elizabeth overhearing.

Adrien went into the nurse’s office to use the phone. John was watching, wondering what was going on. When Adrien came back, he looked pretty worried.

What’s going on? said John. Adrien hushed John, not wanting to wake Elizabeth.

I’ll talk to you outside, said Adrien, looking older by the minute.

They stepped out into the corridor, leaving Elizabeth asleep on the chair.

"Brett found out Steph’s ex-husband Shane has killed his girlfriend. He shot her, and it looks like he came down here and shot Steph. Shane is still on the run. No one knows where he is, and Brett’s trying to find him.

I just rang the police. They’re sending someone down to stay with Steph. Shane might return if he knows Steph’s still alive. Adrien was so scared for Steph and Elizabeth.

John was in disbelief, trying to comprehend what he was hearing.

Elizabeth could be in danger as well? said John. Oh my God. This is a nightmare that wasn’t ending, just getting worse by the second, John thought.

They went back into Steph’s room to wait.

A few hours had passed. A policeman was standing outside Steph’s door now. Adrien, John and Elizabeth all stayed by Steph’s bedside, waiting and hoping for her to wake up.

John had plenty of time to think. He thought he knew Steph. She had never mentioned her ex-husband. John was starting to doubt her love for him. Who is this person? She certainly didn’t trust me, he thought. Adrien was almost reading John’s thoughts.

She doesn’t trust anyone, said Adrien.

John just looked at Adrien, not saying anything. He was drained, not thinking straight.

Chapter 4

Brett was on a personal mission to find Shane and make him pay. Keith was concerned; he knew Brett blamed himself in a way for the death of his mum and his sister. So he knew Brett wouldn’t let up until he made sure Steph was safe. Brett genuinely cared for Steph, maybe even loved her.

Keith gave Brett a ride around to his mate Daivo’s place. He knew he had a spare bike that he could borrow for Brett to use.

You can use it as long as you need, said Daivo, who had several bikes in his shed.

The two of them rode around, trying to find out who Shane’s friends were. They started with his workmates. Keith knew one guy he worked with, Russell, so they headed around to his house.

Russell said he hadn’t seen Shane at work since last Monday, but one of his workmates, Richard he might know more. They used to hang out, spending a lot of their time at the gun club.

Shane is a strange bloke. A bit of a loner, not too many friends. Be careful around him; he’s a bad-ass biker, said Russell, having a dig at Keith and Brett, who were both bikers. But they knew what he meant.

The Club only opened on Sundays, and lucky for them, it was Sunday. So, they rode out to the Gun Club.

The Club was out of town about a thirty-minute drive. As they drove in the driveway, there were about ten cars and three motorbikes parked. They took their helmets off and walked in. They could hear gunshots. Keith recognised one of the bikes. It belonged to his mate, Bubbles.

Brett remembered Bubbles and knew he was a good bloke. They could trust him, he might be able to help them. As they walked into the gun club, they were confronted by a very hefty bloke. He looked like a bouncer from a nightclub.

How can I help you? the bloke said.

Just as they were about to talk, a voice yelled out.

Keith, Brett, how are you? I’ll sign them in, Mick, said Bubbles.

The Gun club had strict rules about visitors, and everyone had to be signed in by a member. All the lanes were occupied with shooters, and nobody seemed to notice them walking in.

So, what brings you blokes to the Gun Club? Bubbles asked.

Can we sit down and talk? said Keith.

They all sat down at a table after grabbing a cold drink from a vending machine.

You know a bloke called Shane Williams? asked Brett, wanting to get on with it.

Yeah, I’ve seen him about, not for a few weeks though. What do you want with him? Bubbles asked.

You know the police are after him, said Keith, looking for a reaction.

Yeah, I heard that, said Bubbles, still wondering what Brett and Keith would want with him.

You remember Steph from about twelve years ago? said Brett.

Yeah, she lived with you for a while, didn’t she? She was a good kid. Whatever happened to her? Bubbles asked.

She was married to Shane Williams years ago, and he used to beat the crap out of her until she left him. Well, he found her and tried to kill her, said Brett with bitterness.

Oh shit. I don’t know where Shane is, said Bubbles concerned. He used to hang out with Richard, Bubbles said, pointing to lane four.

Richard was firing his gun; when he finished he laid his weapon on the bench picking up his empty bullet cases.

After Richard packed up his gear, he headed out to his car where Brett and Keith waited for him. Keith told Brett, Keep a cool head, if he’s a good mate of Shane’s, he won’t tell us anything.

Hi, Richard, I’m Keith. I’m a mate of Bubbles.

Richard stopped to open his car boot to put his gear in there.

Gidday, said Richard, thinking it might be about a gun he was trying to sell.

Is it about the 38’ I’ve got for sale? Richard asked.

No, actually, I was wondering when was the last time you saw Shane Williams, said Keith. Richard’s face went all serious, Why would you be asking about him?

You know he murdered his girlfriend, said Brett, slightly pissed off at his attitude.

I heard that, said Richard in a defensive tone. What’s that got to do with you? he asked.

He tried to murder a good friend of mine as well, said Brett, getting angry.

Richard’s tone changed, Sorry to hear that. I’ve just had the police hounding me. I don’t know where Shane is, and I haven’t seen him since all this started. I can’t help you, sorry, he got in his car and drove off.