Learning Doing Being

By Henry Reynard

In the depths of despair, Ben stands at the crossroads of his shattered life, faced with a choice that will redefine his existence.

 

Venturing into the unknown, Ben grapples with the complexities of identity, resilience, and the profound lessons embedded in life's unpredictable tapestry.

 

Authored by the acclaimed storyteller Henry Reynard, this novel transcends the boundaries of fiction to explore the universal themes of personal growth and the unwavering human spirit.

 

As Ben confronts his deepest fears, readers are invited to join him on a riveting expedition of self-exploration, empowerment, and the intricate dance of learning, doing, and being.

 

Reynard's masterful storytelling navigates the intricacies of the human experience, offering a narrative that resonates with wisdom, hope, and the enduring power within us all.

 

"Learning Doing Being" is more than a story—it's a profound exploration of what it means to be truly alive.

 

Embark on a journey ofself-discovery, confronting the truth and the pursuit of purpose.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Henry Reynard
• Release date: Jan 30, 2024
• ISBN: 9798224636747

Book preview

Prologue

Seeds of Destiny: The formidable years

New beginnings: From Suburbia to Skyscrapers

Awakening Faith: The Birth of a Believer.

Departure: Embracing Independence

and the Call of the Unknown

Fateful Encounter: The Threads of Destiny Intertwine

Shifting Paths: A Leap into the Unknown

Birthing a New Identity: The Uncharted Path of Parenthood

Embracing Liberation: The Healing Power of Forgiveness

Rekindling the Sparks and the Twilight of Matrimony

A Dance of One

Unveiling Shadows: The Pursuit of Clarity

Doubts in the Shadows: Seeking Answers Amidst the Faith

The Quest for Veritas: The truth will set you free. Or will it?

Crossroads Ahead: Navigating the Unknown

The Veiled Passage: A Mysterious Trail to the Hidden Realm

Introducing the ego: Unmasking the Illusion

The Silent Watcher: The Observer's Awakening

Integrating the Jung philosophy

The Dual Loyalty Conundrum: An impossible journey

Wrestling the ego: Unravelling the ties that bind

Whispers of the Soul: Unveiling the true Self

Embracing Shadows: Navigating the Abyss

The Hidden Power Within: Unveiling Strength Through Presence

Gratitude. The key to everything.

Shadows and Light: Navigating the Realm of Right and Wrong

The Quest Unveiled

ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

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I extend my deepest gratitude to Dr. Joe Dispenza, Eckhart Tolle, Anthony Robbins, Neale Donald Walsch and Bart D. Ehrman for their profound contributions to the fields of personal development, spirituality, and human potential. Your teachings, wisdom, and insights have been a source of profound inspiration and guidance in the creation of this book.

Prologue

Ben gazed at the worn Bible, its golden letters on the cover shimmered in the twilight. Like a sailor to a lifeboat, he had clung to it for so long. He trusted in its precepts to give guidance, promises, purpose, meaning. But now...now he wasn't so sure.

With a heavy sigh, he ran a hand through his hair, the familiar words of Scripture running through his mind. He had built his whole life around them - the call to live purely, faithfully, righteously. Ben was 46, divorced, alone and struggling to make ends meet. He wondered why it had come to this. He expected God to bless him and be fruitful for his faith, allowing him to live out God's grand design.

I don't understand, he whispered, tears welling up in his eyes. I did everything right...

But in his gut, he knew that wasn't completely true. He had doubts, questions he dared not ask. Parts of his faith that never quite sat right with his reason and intellect. And so he had shoved them down, plastered on a smile, and kept trudging down the path he thought was righteous, according to the Book. He shook his head, slowly getting up from the table. He couldn't keep pretending. The cognitive dissonance between what he had been told to believe and what his own eyes, heart, and mind told him was true, had grown too great. If he kept ignoring it, he would shatter completely.

Grabbing his keys, he stormed out into the night, not even sure where he was going. He just drove, tears blurring his vision. He thought back to his childhood - the warmth and safety he had felt nestled within his faith community. The love he thought was unconditional. He cherished those memories...and yet, nuances of doubt had crept in even then. Questions about inconsistencies in what he was told about science, history, human nature. The black-and-white worldview that left no room for mysteries and paradoxes. Repressed rules and resulting guilt. Pressure to play a prescribed role, though it never fit quite right.

Then came the rebellion - experimentation here and there during high school, testing boundaries. But it was after graduation, out on his own in the real world that the façade slowly began crumbling at the edges. Life was far messier, far more beautiful and tragic and unpredictable than he had been told. People more complicated, questions of right and wrong less clear-cut. Each blow slowly chinked his tidy dogma, the certainty he had clung to like a life-raft in a tempest sea.

And so the years slipped by, the chinks widening to crevices. He papered over them as best he could to keep up appearances. But tonight, the weight had become too much. His boat was sinking, the world he thought he knew swallowed by cold, swirling waters. He had to make a choice - cling harder to the splitting wood, grasping the life he thought he should have. Or let go, and learn to swim unanchored in strange new waters.

Chapter 1

Seeds of Destiny: The formidable years

Ben's childhood unfolded in the tranquil embrace of a small mining town nestled in the heart of South Africa. It was a place where time moved at its own pace, and dreams floated through the air like secrets whispered by the wind. In this forgotten corner of the world, Ben and his best friend, Anthony, delighted in the simplicity of their surroundings. Despite the town's limitations, they found joy in the everyday wonders that surrounded them. To them, it was a realm of boundless possibilities, where imagination reigned supreme.  Ben and Anthony, turned the town into their playground, their sanctuary, and the canvas for endless escapades. As the wind tousled their hair, they rode their bicycles with unbridled enthusiasm, unaware of the adventures that awaited them around every corner.  Their trusty steeds carried them everywhere their young minds could conjure. In this idyllic place, they felt no need for the luxury of a car ride. The town's small size made such conveniences seem unnecessary. As they cruised through the streets, their laughter bouncing off the ancient walls of buildings that had seen generations come and go.

Years later, as Ben look back on those cherished memories, he would often regale others with a light-hearted remark about their quaint little town. You know, he would say with a playful grin, our town was so small that we never had to worry about pedophiles lurking in the shadows. We had to buy our own sweets!

As a redheaded boy, Ben often faced the sting of mockery, like when his classmates teased him about his fiery locks, comparing him to a particularly vibrant carrot. But Ben was no ordinary vegetable, and he refused to let the taunts wilt his spirit. Most of his peers couldn't see his ginger locks and freckles, leaving Ben to navigate a world blissfully unconcerned with his perceived differences.

However, there was one incident that clung to his mind like a stubborn barnacle. A teacher's ill-advised nickname of Pumkin Patch had sparked laugher among his classmates, a cruel jibe that would shadow him throughout the day. As the school day drew to a close, the whispers of mockery reached Ben's ears, fueling a fire within him. With a determination simmering, he held his ground, and pandemonium erupted in a tumultuous clash. Outnumbered and cornered, Ben found himself at the mercy of the bullies until Anthony, his steadfast comrade, charged to his rescue. Together, they repelled the tormentors, a moment that compelled Ben to stand up for himself.

While occasional jabs at his appearance were brushed off, the seeds of a quiet, insidious low self-esteem had unwittingly taken root within him. It was a struggle as real as trying to eat soup with a fork—frustrating, messy, and often leaving him hungry for more. But in that defining moment, as Anthony swooped in like a caped crusader, Ben realized that even a ginger-haired knight could have his day in the sun.

Ben had an elder sister named Kate, four years his senior, she would at times embody an older sister's protective embrace, shielding him from the harsh winds of the world. Yet, the delicate balance that existed between them was not immune to the fractures of human nature. Like a storm brewing on the horizon, sibling rivalry would rear its unruly head. Their clashes were as frequent as a marathon of family board games, each bringing its own mix of drama, competition, and the occasional flying game piece. The scars etched upon Ben's skin were a testament to the battles they waged, both physical and emotional. Their existence had become a tightrope, a precarious balance between love and rivalry, tenderness and aggression. Beneath the turbulent surface of their relationship lay a deep-rooted bond, forged in the crucible of shared experiences. Unbeknownst to him, Kate would play a profound role in his life. As the years advanced and maturity settled upon them, she would emerge as his rock, his unwavering ally. But for now, she lingered as a constant source of annoyance, a reminder of their shared bloodline.

In the shadow of the mining town, Ben’s father, Robert, stood as a physical embodiment of strength and resilience. His tall frame, standing at an imposing six feet four, commanded attention as he entered any room. The years spent toiling underground in the mines had sculpted his muscular build, a testament to his unwavering dedication to hard labour. But beneath the layers of brawn and bold presence, there lurked a man hopelessly smitten with love. Robert's heart belonged to Susan, his wife, and she held a power over him that few could comprehend. From the moment he set eyes on her, he was as spellbound as a frog under a witch's enchantment, utterly captivated by her breathtaking beauty, her iron-willed personality, and her unwavering convictions. She held sway over his heart like a queen over her kingdom, and at times, it seemed her strength overshadowed his own, leaving him as defenseless as a knight armed with a spatula facing a dragon.

In the confines of their modest home, Ben's parents, working-class pillars of strength, navigated life's challenges with stoic resolve. Their marriage, though content, bore the weight of unspoken tensions and unfulfilled dreams.

In Ben's childhood home, a force of unwavering conviction reigned supreme. Susan, his mother, stood as a pillar of faith, her devotion to Christianity etched upon her every word and action. With Bible verses readily at her disposal, she had honed the skill of quoting scriptures, even if it meant taking them out of context to justify her actions.

With a strength that commanded attention, she ruled the household with an iron will and a wooden spoon in hand. Her perfectionist nature left no room for chaos or disarray, for she believed that order was the foundation of a well-functioning home. Her two mantras: Don't put it down, put it away and everything has a place, echoed through the halls, their words etched upon the hearts of her family members.

In Susan's eyes, these mantras were more than mere words; they were the guiding principles that shaped her worldview. Susan's commitment to her faith and her pursuit of perfection were born out of a desire to create a sanctuary, a sanctuary where her loved ones could find solace and security amidst the uncertainties of the world. Her intentions, though at times misguided, were rooted in a deep well of love and a fervent belief that her actions would pave the way to a better life. Susan, with her relentless pursuit of flawlessness, found it difficult to offer compliments or encouragement to her loved ones. Instead, her critical gaze focused on the faults and missteps, highlighting what went wrong rather than acknowledging their triumphs. In Susan's mind, this approach was driven by a desire to improve her children and her husband, instilling within them the ambition to strive for more. But the unintended consequence was a sense of inadequacy that, in later years, permeated the very essence of Ben's being.

On Sunday mornings, a hushed air of reverence enveloped Ben and his sister as they trod the familiar path to Sunday school. There, amidst the whispered echoes of faith, Ben found himself drawn into the captivating tales of the Bible, his imagination taking flight like a caged bird let loose for the first time. But as the morning lessons drew to a close, their journey led them deeper into the heart of the church, a place where Ben's irrepressible spirit often collided head-on with the solemnity of the sermons.

On one fateful day, Ben's restlessness grew insatiable, pushing Susan's patience to its breaking point. His mind wandered, his legs twitched, and the weight of stillness bore down upon him like an invisible burden. Despite Susan's whispered stern warnings, his fidgeting persisted, akin to a mischievous puppy determined to test the limits of its leash. As the sermon reached its crescendo, Ben's restlessness reached its peak. In a last-ditch effort to elicit compliance from the unruly Ben, Susan's delicate fingers curled into a desperate grasp, in her mind, the only course of action left to her. With a mixture of trepidation and determination, she unleashed a pinch upon his unsuspecting flesh, like a desperate attempt to wrangle a wayward goat. Unable to contain his grievance, Ben's voice erupted, breaking the silence like a thunderclap. Stop pinching me! he blurted out, his words carrying through the hallowed halls of the church, sending the congregation's heads swiveling in unison, their attention drawn away from the sermon. In that moment, time seemed to stand still as Susan's face flushed with embarrassment, her cheeks turning a shade of red that could rival the church's most vibrant stained-glass window. She seized Ben by the arm, her grip firm and unyielding, and together they made their way to the door, their exit marked by the hushed whispers of the startled parishioners, the weight of their disapproving gazes heavy upon their backs.

Outside the sanctuary, the weight of consequences loomed heavy upon Ben's shoulders. He knew that his actions had crossed a line, disrupted the sacred space. Yet, as he faced the impending punishment, a glimmer of defiance

flickered in his eyes, a silent declaration that the price he paid was worth the stand he had taken. The hiding that awaited him was indeed severe, but Ben clung to the belief that his rebellion had served a purpose, a small act of defiance against the tyranny of silence and stillness. From that day forward, whenever they found themselves in church together, Ben would lay down and sleep on Susan's lap, subtle protest against the forces of restraint and conformity that sought to stifle his irrepressible spirit.

In Ben's childhood, happiness wove its threads with gentle