LADY LEADER LEAVES LASTING LEGACY: From the Cotton Patch to the Pentagon and Beyond

By Alice Astafan

This book is the story of my life, a lady who grew up on a small farm in the Deep South, and how I was able to reach the top of my career field, serving as a two-star general at the Pentagon.

Women have served, both in and out of uniform, in defense of this country since the beginning of our nation. Serving the United States Air Force in uniform was my career choice.

This book is an outgrowth of the review of publicity surrounding my military career, both active and reserves, and follow-on civilian career, and of the inventory of the more than 100 speeches I gave when I reached the top of my career field. Audiences in the 1980s and 90s were surprised to learn of the original roadblocks, both laws and policies, which precluded me, a woman, from setting goals at the beginning of my military journey in 1960 to reach the level to which I finally achieved during my career in uniform.

All I had when in uniform were male mentors, because there were no females to which I could look for guidance and success stories. Indeed, my accomplishments led to the glass ceiling being opened wide for the other ladies who came after me and were recognized for their ability and talents to serve and excel at higher levels of leadership.

Friends who know of my accomplishments implored me to put pen to paper to show how I, as a young girl could —with hard work, tenacity, stick-to-it-iveness and using lessons learned in early years —propel myself to the forefront, leading to success. Come with me as I take you back to the beginning, to my first role models: my mother and father who set examples for me and taught me lessons that would propel me even further than a little 1940's farm girl from Oakman, Alabama could have imagined. I hope you'll be inspired to see where my dreams took me, finding love, heartbreak, adventure and prestige along the way.

• Language: English
• Publisher: AuthorHouse
• Release date: Nov 8, 2023
• ISBN: 9798823016056

Alice Astafan

When Alice was a precocious, young girl she dreamed of getting off the family's Alabama farm and seeing the world. Deciding she didn’t want to work so hard to make a living she put herself through college before enlisting in the United States Air Force in 1960. Little did she know that not only would she see the world, she would end up making history. On the way to becoming the first female 2-star General in the Air Force Reserves, she would have a spectacular military career, meet and marry the love of her life and add a son to her family, only to lose him to leukemia. Join Alice on the journey to shattering the glass ceiling for women in the military and what comes next for a lady leader leaving a legacy.

Book preview

© 2023 Alice Astafan. All rights reserved.

No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or

transmitted by any means without the written permission of the author.

AuthorHouse™

1663 Liberty Drive

Bloomington, IN 47403

www.authorhouse.com

Phone: [phone]

Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in

this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views

expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the

views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

Scripture quotations are taken from the HOLY BIBLE: EASY-TO-READ VERSION

© 1987, 1989, 1992 by World Bible Translation Center, Inc. and used by permission.

ISBN: 979-8-8230-1604-9 (sc)

ISBN: 979-8-8230-1605-6 (e)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2023919717

Published by AuthorHouse  11/08/2023

25717.png

Contents

Author’s Note

Prologue: Clipping Wings

1.     Economic Recession, Coming War, My Birth on Davidson Farm: 1938

2.     My World Expands Beyond Home, Family Nest Fills, Begins to Empty, School Years: 1944- 1956

3.     From the Farm to the University: 1956-1960

4.     Off I Go into the Wild Blue Yonder—Military Career Begins: 1960 - 1962

5.     England During the Cold War — First Overseas Assignment: 1962-1965

6.     Oklahoma, Here I Come — Home Owner, Marriage: 1965 - 1968

7.     Thailand — My Second Overseas Assignment: 1968 - 1969

8.     Home From Thailand — Back To Tinker AFB, Oklahoma: 1969 - 1973

9.     From Active Duty to Reserves — California Becomes Home, Son Arrives: 1973 - 1987

10.   AF Acquisition Logistics Center, Wright-Patterson AFB, Ohio — First Star: 1987-1988

11.   Return to McClellan Air Force Base, Sacramento: 1988-1992

12.   PENTAGON — Family Challenge and Sorrow, Second Star, Military Retirement: 1992-1998

13.   A CEO Challenge Comes My Way: 1998-2008

14.   GOD Sends Help

15.   My Soulmate and My Angel — Love Is the Greatest Blessing of All

Epilogue: What Is My Legacy?

Appendices

Acknowledgements

Dedication

This book is dedicated to all the women who have served in America’s

military from the beginning of our beloved country.

Further, it is dedicated to all of the men who welcomed women to come aboard

to work alongside the men to serve their nation with honor and dignity.

Together, each loved their country and wanted to contribute to its mission and show

the world that we will do what is necessary to preserve our way of life.

And, together, through our cooperative efforts, we will work to ensure that democracy and the founding

principles, established by our beloved forefathers and laid out in our Constitution, will forever prevail.

The lives of our descendants are enriched by the memories we share with them.

Role models who have excelled despite adversity serve to instill hope in others’ lives.

Author’s Note

Women have served, both in and out of uniform, in defense of this country since the beginning of our nation. Serving the United States Air Force in uniform was my career choice.

This book is an outgrowth of the review of publicity surrounding my military career, both active and reserves, and follow-on civilian career, and of the inventory of the more than 100 speeches I gave when I reached the top of my career field. But, audiences in the 1980s and 90s were surprised to learn of the original roadblocks, both laws and policies, which precluded me, a woman, from setting goals at the beginning of my military journey in 1960 to reach the level to which I finally achieved during my career in uniform.

All I had when in uniform were male mentors, because there were no females to which I could look for guidance and success stories. Indeed, my accomplishments led to the glass ceiling being opened wide for the other ladies who came after me and were recognized for their ability and talents to serve and excel at higher levels of leadership.

Friends who know of my accomplishments implored me to put pen to paper to show how I, as a young girl could — with hard work, tenacity, stick-to-it-iveness and using lessons learned in early years — propel myself to the forefront, leading to success.

This is the story of my life, a lady who grew up on a small farm in the Deep South, and how I was able to reach the top of my career field, serving as a two-star general at the Pentagon. Come with me as I take you back to the beginning, to my first role models: my mother and father who set examples for me and taught me lessons that would propel me even further than a little 1940’s farm girl from Oakman, Alabama could have imagined. I hope you’ll be inspired to see where my dreams took me, finding love, heartbreak, adventure and prestige along the way.

Prologue: Clipping Wings

It is interesting and, yes, enlightening what one can learn when obtaining information as a result of a request for information under the FOIA (Freedom of Information Act).

Let me explain: A military two-star promotion board in the Air Force Reserves consists of five two-star colleagues, supposedly randomly selected to serve, and the board chair, who is always an Active Duty three-star Lieutenant General. Every person serving has official military orders and when they enter the board room, the first duty of the day is to swear that he will fairly, and honestly, perform the duties pertaining to the selection of future two-star generals.

That first duty was performed by the group on September 17, 1992, the day my records were in front of the two-star promotion board to become the first female two-star general in the Air Force Reserves.

Then records review begins. All records are scored from 5 to 10. If, in the event one of the five participants scores a 5 and another 9, for example, then the board, as a whole, brings the record to the table and the discussion begins.

Did the panel member scoring a 5 see something in the record which was perhaps missed by the member who scored the 9? There is no discussion of differences unless there is at least a 2-point spread between two ratings.

ln my case, there would be no discussion among those 5 male board participants because they had, in fact, not honored the first duty — to fairly and honestly perform the duties that day. Apparently, they had colluded, ahead of the board convening, to make certain that neither I, nor any female, would ever join their ranks as a two-star general in the Air Force Reserves.

However, the board chair, an honorable, honest Lieutenant General, was at the head of the promotion board that day. Reviewing what they had done — giving my exemplary record the lowest possible rating, a 5; ensuring there would be no discussion, no promotion, and no female 2-star general on their watch — he had something to say.

The board chair, much like a dad who catches his children doing something they should not do, sent these five Generals to the corner for reflection and redirection. Gentlemen, I highly urge you to take a break, consider your actions, then return to ACCURATELY review General Astafan.

The end result: history.

Deciding their own careers would be in jeopardy, thus the men properly evaluated my records that included over 100 glowing evaluations made of my work during my 32-year career, all by male supervisors, without any hint of fraud, waste or abuse in any of my records, assignments and jobs at any level.

The last five evaluations were by four-star Generals, all of whom agreed: She can handle any two-star position. The board reconvened; finally performing their first duty as sworn to do, I received the scores I deserved, and on March 13, 1993, after Congress had approved the selection, I became the first female 2-star General in the Air Force Reserves.

Whether these five officers changed their evaluation due to a sincere change in their hearts, or to save their own careers, or to merely do what was the correct and honest action to take, only they can answer that.

What I am grateful for is that the presiding Lieutenant General performed his role honestly and with integrity, holding the rest of the board accountable for their biased initial action. I am also glad I did not learn of that debacle until after I had successfully served until the end of my career in 1998.

Since my wings were not clipped, I continued to soar in my chosen career with pride and passion.

And now I have the story to tell of how an Alabama farm girl became a lady leader leaving a legacy.

1.

Economic Recession, Coming War,

My Birth on Davidson Farm

1938

On the world’s stage, events being set in motion by Germany’s Adolf Hitler had war storm clouds gathering in Europe, despite Britain’s newly elected Prime Minister, Neville Chamberlain stating: I believe there will be peace in our time. Meanwhile in Asia, Japan invaded China, capturing Beijing, Shanghai and Nanjing. While engaging in China, Japan sank several U.S. ships, but then apologized and paid reparations. In the Soviet Union, trials of Bolsheviks peaked, sending millions of Soviet citizens to labor camps or death in prison, eliminating all opposition to Joseph Stalin’s leadership. Stalin now ruled as absolute dictator.

On the US stage, the President of the United States of America was Franklin Roosevelt, serving his third term. Life expectancy was 59.7 years. The Shell Oil Company was granted a 75-year concession to search for oil in Oman. Perhaps this was the beginning of America’s defending various areas in the Middle East to keep oil flowing to the United States. In later years, I would learn that much of the war planning efforts by the United States military did in fact involve doing just that: protecting the lanes of commerce to ensure the oil from the Middle East would continue to come to a growing and developing country.

The famous singer Kate Smith introduced the song God Bless America, originally written by Irving Berlin in 1918 but revised for her to sing on the November 10, 1938 CBS Armistice Day radio program. America was still in a terrible economic depression and with Hitler taking over Europe, Americans were afraid we’d have to go to war. It was a time of hardship and worry for most Americans.

Closer to home, the Speaker of the United States House of Representatives was Democrat William B. Bankhead, who hailed from Jasper, the county seat of government for Walker County, Alabama. Far more important to many was the fact that he was the father of the soon to be famous actress, Tallulah Bankhead, whose movies were showing in the local theaters.

Davidson Farm

166.jpg

The Jeremiah Jerome and Cordelia Matilda Myers Davidson house, built in early 1900’s, was

the house in which my parents, Charles and Sarah Appling Davidson, began their married

life in 1933, and in which all nine of their children, including I, in 1938, were born.

The tin roof and concrete steps were later additions.

Oil painting of the house by Artist Oliver Woods, long-time neighbor and friend.

Just eight miles south of Jasper was Davidson Farm.

The family farm of Jeremiah Jerome Davidson, JJ or Jerry, as he was called by many in his family and friends, still consisted of 140 acres of the original cultivated and wooded parcels that he had purchased between 1895 and 1905.

Grandpa JJ and his wife, Cordelia Myers Davidson, had delivered 11 and reared nine children in the old log cabin and in the new clapboard house built in the early 1900s. The cultivated acres of corn and cotton and vegetables provided the livelihood for his large family, and the wooded area provided the lumber and boulders for erecting the necessary buildings: the barn, the chicken house, the wagon shelter, the buggy shelter and of course the outhouse. Boulders found on the property had also been used to build the fireplace chimney and reinforce the walls of the hand dug open well, which provided water to drink and use for everyday purposes. By 1938, the clapboard house had a weathered look, but no paint, no indoor plumbing, bathroom or electricity.

As all of the older siblings had left the farm, it fell to the youngest son, Charles Edward Davidson, to remain and carry on the farm work. Charles had to drop out of school after the eleventh grade to keep the farm work going, and to take care of his very ill mother, who died of consumption on July 22, 1932. In his will drafted in 1933, JJ deeded the farm to Charles.

On December 23, 1933, Charles Edward and Sarah Ann Appling were married in that same old farmhouse.

To that union, two handsome boys, Charles Owen and George Aaron, and one beautiful daughter, Sarah Kathryn, had been added and were present on August 23,1938 to welcome me, Nora Alice, baby girl number two, child number four, into the family.

My Birth, August 23, 1938: The temperature was around 100 degrees and there wasn’t a cool place to be found. The crops had been laid by and it seemed as if there wasn’t any trouble or care in the whole community, which was composed of four families. But in that old farm house, located two miles north of Oakman, Alabama, Walker County — about 45 miles northwest of Birmingham and approximately 150 miles northwest of Montgomery — I was arriving.

My mother gave birth to me unattended by a doctor at 7:45 pm, Tuesday, August 23, 1938. My dad had gone peddling first thing in the morning, then gathered garden vegetables to take peddling the next day. Although Dr. Stevenson had been advised of my pending arrival, he arrived too late to assist with the birth, but did come the next day.

My dad, who kept a daily diary for 70 or more years of his life, had made this two-day entry in his August 1938 diary: 23. Went peddling, gathered peddling. Baby girl born 15 min till 8 pm. Dr. Too late. 24. Went peddling. Stella came. Dr. Stevenson came. (Stella was my mother’s oldest sister.)

165.jpg

The cover and pages of Dad’s 1938 handwritten journal recording my birth.

According to Dad’s journal, August 1938 was a busy month on the farm. Dad helped Mother with the canning of tomatoes and apples, and the weekly washing. Potatoes were put in, and late corn, turnips, cabbage and butter beans were planted for fall harvest. Peas and other vegetables were picked daily for peddling. Neighbors Thomas Gant cut and raked the hay; Bill Wiggins helped and hauled it to the barn. The sow was carried for breeding with Grady Rutledge’s male. Dad made a trip to Jasper, adjusted cotton bales, Uncle Dan (Myers – his mother’s brother) put on cotton poison. Dad cut the boys’ hair (Owen would have been 4, George 3 and Kathryn 2). On Sundays, Dad, the boys and Grandpa (Dad’s dad) went to church.

There was a constant arrival and departure of visitors: Mother’s nephews, Joseph Howard and Milford (Appling); Grandpa’s sisters, Aunt Hassie (Grace) and boys and Aunt Sally (Sartain); Dad’s brother Sewell (Davidson) and Sewell’s son-in-law Bill (Wiggins) came by; Berry Swindle, James and Negro Perry came and fished (on the creek). Grandpa was brought back from Aunt Annie’s (Annie Sargent, his daughter in Birmingham) by her daughters Bea and Jewell, who stayed for a week. Clayton and Myrtie (Swindle) came after church on the 14th, Wilson and Annie Swindle and Ed Odom came after church on the 21st. On the 22nd, Grandpa went to Ed Evans.

So, present for my birth with Dad was Dad’s brother Sewell, his wife Mae and their daughter Clercie, who was married to Bill Wiggins and was our closest neighbor. Then Mother’s oldest sister, Stella (Walton) came and stayed three days. Aunt Esther Appling came and did the washing. Grandpa came home, went back to Ed Evans. Aunt Myrtle (Burton - Mother’s sister) and her boys came, took Stella home and stayed three days. Myrtle and Dad did the washing and cooked. Aunt Josie (Morris) came. Sunday, August 28, Mother’s brothers: Basil and wife Lilly Appling, Edgar Appling, Glenn and wife Ruth Appling, and Cousin Edd and Bessie Davidson came. Uncle Elbert Burton came and took his wife Myrtle and boys back home. Mr. Bell came on the 31st.

By the first of September, things were getting back to normal, with Dad cooking, gathering, peddling and noting in his journal that Sarah (my mother) helped some. September began the very busy cotton-picking season, but visitors continued to arrive. On Sunday, September 4, Dad’s brother Tandy and wife Florence Davidson, Mother’s sister Mary and husband Jeffie Myers and children, and Mother’s brother Jimmie and wife Virgie Appling came and spent the day. On the 8th, Florence, Mae and Mary Carter (Tandy and Florence’s daughter) came. Dad’s brother Jerome and family came on the 10th and stayed for church the next day.

On Sunday, September 18, Dad noted that All went to church. Went preaching to New Hope in the evening. That would have been my first attendance at church. I was not quite a month old.

As the fourth one in a family of what was to eventually include nine children, my mother and daddy knew just what to expect. History was handed down that I learned to take my first step when I was 11 1/2 months old. Soon after I learned to walk, we were visiting my aunt and uncle who lived in Townley, Alabama, and the first thing I did was walk across a freshly painted floor and left my footprints. I learned to tie my own shoes and help my mother in the kitchen even before I started school.

Farm Family Life and Lessons: Of course, I did not know it at the time of my birth, but I have since come to the conclusion that I was born into a well to do family. We had no mortgage; in fact, we lived in the house that Grandpa JJ had built with his and his boys’ own hands, on land that my grandfather had originally purchased, now deeded by will to my father, who would pay for it with a life time of hard work. Grandpa JJ’s oldest son had purchased 21 acres of the original farm land for his own family farm, and all other sons, except my dad, had left for jobs in greener pastures; two settled in Texas. The three girls had married and lived with their families in nearby towns; one later moved with her husband and children to West Virginia.

164.jpg

With Siblings and Cousins, Oakman, Alabama, 1942. (Seated, left to right): Nora Alice Davidson, 4, born Aug. 23, 1938, fourth child of Charles and Sarah Ann Appling Davidson; Paul Watson Davidson, 18 months, born Nov. 22, 1940, fifth child of Charles and Sarah Ann Appling Davidson; baby in my lap is Donald Appling, 6 months, born Oct. 19, 1941, second child of Glenn and Mary Ruth Davidson Appling. This was my first attempt at babysitting!

(Standing left to right): At edge of picture: Horace Mason Appling, 3, born Nov. 8, 1939, oldest child of Glenn and Mary Ruth Davidson Appling; Alton M. Davidson, 6, born 1935, youngest child of Sewell and Mae Watts Davidson; George Aaron Davidson, 6, born Oct.18, 1935, second child of Charles and Sarah Ann Appling Davidson; Sarah Kathryn Davidson, 5, born Nov. 13, 1936, third child of Charles and Sarah Ann Appling Davidson; Hubert Myers, 7, born 1934, youngest child of Jeffie and Mary Jane Appling Myers; William Harold Guthrie, 8, son of Mildred Cressie Myers and Howard G. Guthrie; Charles Owen Davidson, 7, born Oct. 1, 1934, oldest child of Charles and Sarah Ann Appling Davidson.

The Davidson farm house was small; a kitchen with eating area, three bedrooms for 12 folks (and Grandpa had one of them, a small bedroom by himself). Soon the hallway became a bedroom for the older boys. We had one fireplace for heating; a wood burning cook stove, a front porch with banisters with a swing mounted at each end, and a back porch where we had a well from which we could manually draw water for our use. We had to use a path to get to the outhouse. There was no running water or heated water for bathing except the pot which heated it in the water reservoir designed into the wood fired cook stove.

What we lacked in niceties during the 1930s and 40s, that in today’s world would be considered as necessities in the United States of America, we had other things which made up for these shortcomings. Our parents were God-fearing Christians who loved us enough to make each of us work, both at home and in the cotton, corn, sugar cane, and sweet potato fields, and in the garden which grew the food that provided our meals.

All nine of us developed a real love for work and we all proved to be successful in our own chosen means of making our living in this world once we were in our own lane, off the farm. We never wanted nor participated in any government subsidized programs or handouts. We were taught to be self-sufficient and to be ready to assist others in need in our community. In school, we were held to high standards: respect your teachers, be on time, be prepared and properly dressed. My dad’s rule: if you get in trouble with your teacher or principal, you will be in trouble with him again at home. In our community, we were to respect all law enforcers and to obey the laws of the road. We only had to walk a mile to catch the school bus, so we all got plenty of exercise – two miles a day until the school bus finally was routed by our house. None of us were ever overweight until years later.

We had cows which gave us milk, chickens which gave us eggs and meat, pigs which gave us ham and bacon and lard. We had dried corn to take to the grist mill to be ground into cornmeal for our corn pone for every mid-day meal. If enough was left over, we would enjoy milk and cornbread along with any leftover dinner veggies for our supper. The only things we had to purchase were sacks of flour, from which my mother — and then we girls — made biscuits that we had at every breakfast meal, and sometimes my mom would make a cake or chocolate pies. We also purchased cocoa and sacks of sugar, but more often, we had desserts made from sorghum syrup from our own farm, which provided sugar. None of us ever went to bed hungry, unless we were in trouble at the dinner table and were sent to bed without supper. It didn’t happen often.

My mom made all of our clothes, using feed sacks from the feed which my dad got to feed the chickens in exchange for the vegetables and eggs he took to the local stores. He always tried to get several sacks which had the same patterns on it so my mom would have enough to make dresses, because it always took more than one to design a dress or whatever she was sewing. Of course, flour came in solid white sacks from which she could make dish towels or pillow cases. My mom was ever resourceful, thankfully.

We were taught by their example to visit the sick, the shut-ins and elderly and those who could no longer help themselves. My mother always kept extra handmade quilts to pass on to those whose house was destroyed by fire or storms. She took food to folks who were disabled or ill.

On one occasion, when I was a pre-teen, I walked two miles with my mom to help a lady who was dying of breast cancer. She took care of the lady all day, for free; my job was to sweep and mop the kitchen. I still remember the smell from the rotting flesh; not much hope in those days for any woman who had the misfortune of being diagnosed with breast cancer. At the end of the day, mom and I had to walk the two miles back home to our own family’s duties.

Finally, we all were in Bible Study and worship service every Sunday morning, dressed in the best clothes we had and with our shoes polished. And we spent many hours in Gospel meetings during the summer. I still recall my father on his knees every night, engaged in prayer, and my mom encouraged each of us to give our dad a good night hug.

163.jpg

With Mom and Dad after Church: Kathryn, Mom, Owen, Dad, George; (In front): Paul, Alice.

Early Memories: My first memory of any event was in the fall of 1941. I would have been three. Owen, my oldest brother, would have been age seven on October 1, 1941, beginning first grade. I remember Dad and I were in the field below the front porch of the old house, near the glass dump where we put all broken glasses, jars or plates. We did not have garbage pickup in those days; we burned all the paper, which was not much as we did not have much paper at all. All food residue from food preparation, any leftover items from our meals or food spoilage went into the slop bucket to be fed to the pigs. I do not know who else in the family was present. I do not recall if Mama was in the field, nor George or Kathryn. Mama likely would have been dealing with baby Paul who was born November 22, 1940.

I recall Owen handing Daddy some papers; probably some school work he had accomplished in class or perhaps a notice to parents. I cannot remember specifics, but I assume that Dad was asking how his day at school went. Owen would have had to walk the mile from the place on the main highway (now Highway 69) where the bus stopped to let him off to continue on foot to our house. I do not know if there were any other children who got off at that bus stop, but perhaps Tommie Elizabeth Wiggins, known as Tootsie, and a year younger than Owen, was with him. She was the daughter of our cousin Clercie Davidson Wiggins and her husband Bill. Tootsie’s mother was the daughter of Dad’s brother Sewell and Mae Davidson. Cousins Gerald and older brother Bill Davidson, sons of Cousin Ed and Bessie Davidson who lived on that road, were likely on the bus too. I don’t know why this memory stuck in my mind, it’s not significant, but 75 years later, I can still see this ordinary country farm day clear as day.

At that time there were only four houses on that entire road, a semi-circle that started at one place on the highway and ended at another place about two miles north. However, the road beyond our house was not passable because the county commissioner considered that part a private road and only maintained the first part. There were no other houses on the second mile onto the main highway.

From Dad’s diary from those days, I later found out Dad had an illness — a high fever illness — that brought doctors from the Mayo Clinic to try to determine what was wrong with him. I have no memory of that, but I do remember his hearing was mostly destroyed; the reason for the fever was never determined, but he had profound issues dealing with hearing aids for all his life. I was accustomed to speaking loudly to him, so when I was asked to talk to Dad when he first had a hearing aid, the salesman told me to speak in a quiet voice to determine if my dad could hear with his new, first ever, hearing aid. He was only fitted for his left ear. Why would a fever destroy hearing in one ear and not both? A 1940 mystery!

One memory of an experience that I had at a very early age has served me well throughout my life. My dad and grandfather had been at our dinner table (for their mid- day meal, which in the South was dinner; night meal was supper); they had taken a break from their fall tasks on the farm. Two of my brothers and my sister were in school; my younger brother, Paul, would have been asleep in his baby bed and I was alone with my mom in the kitchen, which was also our dining room. She was clearing the table and washing the dirty dishes in a dishpan, rinsing them in another pan, drying and putting them away. As usual, she would have cooked enough food for the family’s nighttime meal and had placed some of it in a warmer, which was the upper part of the stove; the stewed meat, as well as the greens (ever present in all our meals), would remain on top of the stove in the original cook pot filled with juice.

All of a sudden, there was a knock on the door leading from the kitchen and dining area to the back porch. It was the entrance everyone, including visitors, used because of the design of the house. My mom went to the door and found a black-skinned, elderly gentleman. (We later learned to affectionately call him Ole Black Joe, because we knew no more about him. He most likely lived in the town of Oakman, which was two miles from our house, so he probably had walked the distance; I cannot remember or perhaps I never knew.)

My mom kindly greeted him, and I suppose it was at that point, he inquired about obtaining a setting hen.

She said, Of course, but first have you been to dinner? He replied,