The Position

By Joyce Kew

Requierment: fitting with a person's needs, activities, and plans.

Angelica is looking for a partner... Mainly for a short period, knowing that untill now, no one managed to fit The position... 

There is a man showing up now. An interesting one, with shy and so submissive eyes, still so much power that turns her world upside down. But Will he fit The position? 

 

• Language: English
• Publisher: Publishdrive
• Release date: Oct 31, 2023
• ISBN: 9798215428122

Book preview

To eliminate the risks of feeling guilty, or ashamed, please read this book alone - in a place where no one peeks on your phone, e-reader, laptop, or computer. (book).

Preface

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28th October 2001. X20 Broad leaf Ln Enfield, Connecticut

It is pouring, the raindrops slowly slide on the window. The little girl is making her homework in silence, at the desk. Near her, is a long shelf filled with sports medals and cups about junior Running Olympics and Leading team works. It's hers two years older brother's all. Yet downstairs, folding the clothes with the usual moves, the middle-aged woman hears the voice of her adolescent son. Again...

You have to sign.

Oh, my Lord, stop it. No. the woman growls.

But I want to do this, Mum, and I have to start now, otherwise it'll be too late.

What did I say? Stop this nonsense , the woman turns to the teenager. He nervously drops the paper on the table.

This nonsense would change my life, he says quietly.

You're unbelievable, aren't you? I can't bear it, what the hell's the matter with you? You're a sharp student, a top athlete. She keeps folding the clothes. It's probably a teenage hoard, as the EMO stage.

It's not... begins the teenager, but in response, his mother slaps the clothes away.

Don't you get what I'm saying?! they raise their voices at the same time, and the teenager's bony hands get firmly clenched in a fist. Bored, the father on the other sofa looks up from his laptop. He simply glances at the arguing couple again. What kind of example are you showing to your sister? continues the woman, You can't be so irresponsible!

The adolescent doesn't answer and growls under his nose.

Me, irresponsible?

Andrew, to your room. says the man, and the boy bows his head, the brown hair covering his scowling face, and turns away from his angry mother, holding back his cries in obedience to the command.

Silence. It is 4 am. when the braided-haired girl opens her eyes. The bed next to her is empty. She hurries to the bathroom and knocks.

I have to do it too, she says softly, but there's no answer. Only the golden light shines out from under the door. Andy, are you still in there? she asks loudly knocking again, but nothing. I'm going to pee myself! she knocks on the door, but still nothing. Hurrying inside, she freezes. ANDY! she shouts, rushing towards the teenager on the white tiles. WAKE UP, YOU HEAR ME? she cries, but the teenager doesn't move to his sister's shrieking voice. Not even when frightened, she staggers to his side and grabs his face. My God, you're so cold. No, no, no! Dad, help! the girl screams, and with trembling hands, she caresses her brother's face, but in vain. DAD!

The tiny fingers grow pale as they cross each other. God, I am begging you... I beg you... I swear my life I won't let him do wrong. I promise, whatever happens, I'll be there... and I'll take care of him... Just please... please forgive him for what he tried to do... Please....

You are silly hears the timid voice of the boy and lifts her face from the white blanket.

I know, I have faith enough for you too... she smiles, but his brother turns away from her.

I want to die...

I won't let you! grabs the girl his face. You hear me? No matter what mum says, we will do it together, okay? she looks at the rosy face. I will help you get through this... from now... till the perfect end.

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13th of September 2010. New York, National Library.

A young girl in skinny jeans and a red sweater stands in front of the books. The book she's looking for is on the last shelf, but she can't reach it. Sighing, she looks around for help. After a few steps, her gaze catches a tall student reading a large book and taking notes on a laptop.

Handsome, she shrugs his shoulders abruptly. Come on, help me. The student looks up at her.

I know you?

Adriana. She holds out her hand.

Ira.

Now help me. she smiles, and he stands up. You're tall. she laughs.

Yes, I am. comes a kind smile in response. So which book?

That one, there, the girl points to the red one. As the young man takes out the book, he reads the title: W. Stekel: Sadism and Masochism The Psychology of Hate and Cruelty.

Really? You read this? he looks at her, but she grins and takes the book from his hand.

"I need it for my dissertation.''

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22nd of September 2010. New York, National Library.

The young girl smiles at the man reading in his usual spot. Put it back, she says, as the man looks up from his book.

Nice to see you again, he grins wearily. She hands him the red book. Have you finished already?

I'm a fast reader, she smiles.

Next book? he asks with a grin.

That the girl points to an old gray book. It's annoying that all these books are on the last shelf.

It would be bad if anyone could read them, I think.... He reaches for the book and reads the title again: Desire and Jouissance in the Teachings of LACAN. What is Jouissance?

Oh, she grins and takes the book from him. Well, jouissance compels the submissive to constantly try to transcend the prohibitions imposed on his pleasure, to go beyond the principle of pleasure.

Silence. The guy stares into the dark eyes, then starts laughing.

Okay... Don't talk about this to my fiancee.

No, you want to get married? she smiles.

Sure comes the straight answer. Next week.

That's bad... says the girl, stepping closer.

No, it's not. I love her. he backs a step.

Really? the girl asks seriously.

Of course I love her.

Yeah, what's sex like with her?

None of your business? he's annoyed, but she smiles.

I can read you.

Please don't he turns back to his desk and closes the book. At the title, she laughs.

So, lawyer..

Stop! A strong voice and she looks at him with piercing dark eyes. You're starting to cross the line. Silence again. She takes a deep breath. You don't know anything about me, what you read is the first impression. Don't judge by words.

I don't do that.

Yes, you do. He closes his laptop. You try to manipulate whoever you want. The fact that I answered you isn't because I don't see what you're doing, it's only good manners. He steps closer to her and looks deep into her dark eyes, and rosy cheeks. I feel it too. You're sexy and beautiful, but I love someone and I know what loyalty means. So don't try to seduce me. She tilts her head to the side, smiling.

Wow... I like you. she holds out her hand again. Friends then?

Five years later...

Chat open:

S.A: Hi handsome. :) Still, happily, married?

I.G: Yes.

S.A: Nice, so they haven't awakened yet...

I.G.:?

S.A: I need your support. 

I.G: You killed someone? 

S.A: Noooo.... :))) Paperwork.

I.G: I don't interfere with parking bills.

S.A: Man. I need a legal backup for the club.

I.G:?

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27th April 2015, MTF Headquarters, San Francisco

How can I be so feeble? Why is it so tough for me to make this decision? The beautiful young woman looks nervously out the vast window, her long eyelashes flicking tears from her blue eyes.

Relax... sounds the soft voice, and the small hand slips gently into her hand. It is a decision that will alter everything. There are tough situations in life when deciding requires a great deal of bravery to face the unforeseeable outcomes. It's like loving and trusting someone.

The blonde woman thoughtfully turns to her sister.

I thought love was a matter of chemistry, not a decision!

Her sister giggles.

Aside from that, what is basic, to love and trust is a decision. The decision, like anything involving people. One day you will know. Some decisions can seem difficult, like this one, with so much to take into account. You are never prepared for everything, and only when you accept the outcome of your decisions and are fully able to deal with them will you discover how strong you are. That's what this is about. There is time, you must not rush, the Doctor also said. Once you can see clearly, it will be easy to make the decision, albeit fearfully. You'll know that the risks are worth the results. By the way... To love yourself is as important a choice as to love somebody else. It's very difficult to control these situations... The woman curls her lips into a small smile when her sister pats her hand. I can already imagine it! My perfect sister with her flawless curls, in a gorgeous white dress, walking on the golden beach with a shy smile, with mister perfect Antonio Banderas.

Oh my God, Becca! Stop it! she laughs.

No, no, no... laughs her sister. I can see the breeze making your dress dance like a Greek goddess's... she points. HM. Don't you like Banderas? A Clooney would suit you better, you're right!

Becca! You're an idiot! she laughs out loud.

Too old for you? 

Stop it!

Okay, well... I'm sure your Mr. Perfect has to be older than you. How did the job interview go then? The brunette stands up.

I'm still waiting, sighs the blonde as she picks up her bag.

Like what?

Prosecutor, comes the quiet reply. I don't know if I want to work there anymore... The beginners have pimped out every time... New York! Here comes the blonde from no man's land, with her fresh degree... she opens the door.

This blonde is an intelligent and elegant woman. What did they say? asks her sister.

"They will call again... They've been calling for about two weeks now...''

25th of May 2015. New York L&J Center

The bald man walks with open arms down the ward. Happy Birthday! he announces. He stops at the desk of the man with a shocked face. So, congratulations too he extends his hand towards him, the Ph.D. is finally completed!

Yes, sir... Thank you the man shakes his hand, and there is a short silence.

Now you're working at 100%? And time for children and family? asks the man, but the man opposite him pulls his lips a little.

Let's stick to the former.

I see, good the bald man slaps his hands in his pockets and looks around the Crime Department. Speaking of work the man looks up at his boss. There's a good position for you as an Executive Manager...

I decline it, thank you he interrupts, and his boss turns to him, puzzled.

You were my Ace in the hand.

Sorry, I don't play cards.

Shall I take someone else then?

Go ahead. You see, Mr. Lewis... I need some time. It's been a lot all of a sudden. Japan and the Ph.D... I'm also working on some stuff for someone I know, and Summer needs me.

Yeah, wives always know how to put themselves first. That way you won't take it?

The executive lives 100% for the company to keep everything under control, and I can't do that right now...

So I shouldn't even try to convince you?

No chance.

"I have only one candidate left... but she's an absolute beginner with outstanding grades!

Better than that. Novices have a lot of potential... They adapt much more readily than someone who comes with years of experience and ingrained norms.

Do you believe so? the boss asks, and the man is looking at him seriously. A woman! announces, no reaction, A sexy blonde bomber! She'28 years old, with a fresh Ph.D. too. She's as much of a perfectionist genius as you are! Will you be able to work with her?

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§

A young brown-haired woman gets on a plane. She takes a seat and looks out into the pouring rain.

I can not believe you can be such a lazy bastard! the woman in the seat ahead growls softly at the man sitting next to her. I can't believe it! This fucking comfort with you!

Give me a break! he says back. The woman curses back. Adriana gags and elbows into the window. She is silent. Others pay her thousands of dollars for this, but now she gets a free show.

I swear, I have no idea who I married. Tell me the day you get off that fucking phone game.

Shut the fuck up! I was allowed..

Shouldn't we talk if we've already got a four-hour flight to make?

About what? 

About anything, she says.

I don't have time now.

Adriana holds back her laughter. She knows very well the problem with the relationship in front of her. She knows. That's why she prefers to be alone. She smiles and leans back. Pulls out her phone and opens a new note.

The dominant is aware! The submissive keep silent! Personal matters are forbidden! "underlines the word forbidden with a firm line.

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11th June 2015, New York

Snow-white shirt, black skirt covering her knees, pretty heels with fiery red lacquer on her thin legs. A silver brooch shaped like a leaping fox glows dully at her heart. She walks contentedly through the freshly painted hall. She looks around, smiling with red-painted lips. The six months' work... done. It has taken a lot of money, but it will soon pay off. A couple more papers and a few more auditions, and her dream will come true.

Ah... she sighs running her long fingers through her straight-ironed hair. How do I get a manager?

Internet comes the reply from the young boy checking the surveillance camera on the ladder. Unfortunately, these will only go live once the whole system is up and running.

Adriana looks up at him.

Internet? 

Sure, the boy shrugs. A good advert, a few keywords, and someone's going to give it a try.

I doubt, the sort of person I need, she shrugs as he slowly climbs down the ladder.

Miss Shadow, what would your expectations be? Wouldn't I be good for the job?

Adriana smiles as the young man looks at her and slowly folds her arms.

How old are you?

Twenty-one!

P ff! You're way too young, Adriana slowly smiles.

Age doesn't matter.

It's true, she says grabbing the boy's T-shirt, blood rushing to his face. But what I need is knowledge and strength. And you, my dear, she whispers in his ear, from the idea of a snapping whip would piss yourself. The boy swallows hard when Adriana lets go and smile at him. By the way, the internet is a good idea!

Hostess Club hires a Manager +25. Requirements: open personality, leadership. Send resumes to... Adriana leans on her white leather sofa and speculates.

That's enough. The sight of plus 25 should give an understanding of everything to anyone interested.

They send me away to find them a fortune

A chest filled with diamonds and gold

The house was awake

With shadows and monsters

The hallways they echoed and groaned

I sat alone, in bed 'til the morning

I'm crying, They're coming for me

And I tried to hold these secrets inside me

My mind's like a deadly disease

I'm bigger than my body

I'm colder than this home

I'm meaner than my demons

I'm bigger than these bones

And all the kids cried out,

Please stop, you're scaring me

I can't help this awful energy

Goddamn right, you should be scared of me

Who is in control?

I paced around for hours, on empty

I jumped at the slightest of sounds

And I couldn't stand the person inside me

I turned all the mirrors around

I'm bigger than my body

I'm colder than this home

I'm meaner than my demons

I'm bigger than these bones

And all the kids cried out,

Please stop, you're scaring me

I can't help this awful energy

Goddamn right, you should be scared of me

Who is in control?

I'm well acquainted

With villains that live in my bed

They beg me to write them

So they'll never die when I'm dead

And I've grown familiar

With villains that live in my head

They beg me to write them

So I'll never die when I'm dead

I'm bigger than my body

I'm colder than this home

I'm meaner than my demons

I'm bigger than these bones

And all the kids cried out,

Please stop, you're scaring me

I can't help this awful energy

Goddamn right, you should be scared of me

Who is in control?

And all the kids cried out,

Please stop, you're scaring me

I can't help this awful energy

Goddamn right, you should be scared of me

Who is in control?

First position: the Dominant.

D.1. The Dominant is Aware. Trained in: anatomy, and first aid.

D.2 The Dominant knows what he wants, how. Do not confuse his submissive

D.3 The Dominant does not change role during the Agreement. 

D.4 The Dominant complies with all rules.

D.5 The Dominant doesn't cross the limits of his submissive.

D.6 The Dominant will never forget the safe word The Dominant will instantly stop the game, if that word is used, even in a whisper/moan. And he assesses the submissive condition, physical and mental.

D.7 The Dominant reigns. Fully aware of the meaning and use of the DS signs.

D.8. The Dominant's words and actions are truthful at all times. He doesn't gamble with the trust of a submissive.

D.9. The Dominant will never play under the influence of alcohol or drugs! "The submissive can refuse to serve and report to the boss.

D.10. The Dominant is alert. He/she never loses sight of the submissive.

Second position: the Submissive

A.1. The submissive is aware. Trained in: anatomy and first aid.

A.2 The submissive obeys the dominant will.

A.3 The submissive does not change role during the Agreement.

A.4. The submissive complies with all rules. Even if the dominant orders him to break the rules. In this case, he/she must report the break of the rules of the play to the boss.

A.5 The submissive shall clarify his limits with the dominant at the beginning of the game.

A.6. The submissive agrees on the safe word with the dominant. It is NOT used hastily.

A.7 The submissive serves. He/she is fully aware of the meaning and use of the DS signs.

A.8. The submissive trusts and beliefs in the dominant. He never doubts it!

A.9. The submissive must not play under the influence of alcohol or drugs. The Dominant is well aware of this! Otherwise, an abuse occurs, the Dominant will bear the consequences.

A.10. The submissive listens to the dominant's words and follows the instructions.

Toys and games:

J.1. Only club-supplied toys are allowed!

J.1.1. Changes to materials may be requested by the customer

J.2. The D customers must inspect all toys to ensure that they are in good condition before and after each use.

J.3 The Dominant is responsible for the hygiene of the toy.

J.4. Use the toy only for the purpose for which it was manufactured.

J.5. Damaged, defective, worn-out toys will be taken back by the club!

Special clause: ropes, straps, ribbons. What is this? I didn't write anything about that!

Q.1. The Dominant can use them with the right knowledge and adequate self-discipline!

Q.2. The submissive does not use these tools on him/herself.

K.3. The Dominant controls the tension on this equipment at all times.

K.3.1. Both parties: Dominant and Submissive are aware of the risk of losing consciousness or danger of death in these cases!

Q.3.2. The Dominant using force is monitoring the appearance of the injuries. (During causing pain-pleasure physically-mentally).

K.3.3 Awareness of forbidden areas: top of hands, head, face, neck.

J.K. Any injury deemed to be serious and which heals in more than eight days will be reported to the Club's doctor by the employee!

Penalties that may be imposed on members/employees

1. Breaching the agreement of confidence: immediate cancellation of the membership Agreement, legal penalty.

2. Immediate consequence for breaking the rules: temporary suspensions of the membership Agreement.

3. Injuries: injuries healing beyond a maximum of eight days *a warning and a temporary suspension...

4. Personal rights, the safety of members compromised by the behavior of the player *losing title, banned from the system, cancellation of the membership Agreement.

8th  of Janury 2016

Qoogly search opens on a smartphone:

Translation: from polish.... Result... mindless.

Search: tied up.

Results...

Video:... Search: bound...

Search results... Video...

Categories....

Let's see... says the quiet deep voice, then he gives a thumbs up to the word: Hardcore. Hmm... A pleasant smile appears on the breaded face. Virgin, no... Bestiality, no... Bondage, fetish... Let's see.... a grin on white teeth.

15th of Jan. 2016 

Qoogly search starts on a smartphone... Which one was it? the voice growls, scrolling to the same video.

22nd of Jan. 2016

Qoogly search starts on a smartphone... Let's see you... hungry smile, scrolling to the same video.

Adriana and Erich's phones flash up simultaneously. Erich looks down at the desk, but the screen in front of him displays the same message:  DPA (Dominant Profile Alert.) Dominant's location is within 50 yards of the club. He's an ideal hostess. Would you like to contact him? Or start the customer ad protocol?

And again:

DPA (Dominant Profile Alert.) Dominant's location is within 20 yards of the club. She is an ideal hostess. Would you like to contact her? Or start the customer ad protocol?

Chat Open:

A.S.: Black mistress... I have a good candidate, so protocol is starting.

A.B.: Finally.

A.S.:One little consern.

A.B.: Lesbian?

A.S.:No. 23y.

A.B.:Wow. I will review Jacke's program.

A.S.:Don't bother. Teach her.

A.B.:Doesn't make sense, you know.

A.S.: Oh, it will... :)

A.B.:As you please... How do you want her?

A.S.: Strong and aware.

A.B.:I thought Sadist?

A.S.: Basic. :D

A.B.: You know, you won't see money from her soon...

A.S.: Relax. I want her to train my subs. :P  Just make sure, when she gets 25 to book in ;)

A.B.: :))) Oh, :)))

23nd of Jan. 2016

Start a Qoogly search... Search: ...bondage master and cutie. A red butterfly rests on the corner of his smartphone, but his full lips are still pressed inward. The phone's screen is turning purple.

"Search Shield prepaired, shadowing in progress..." writes.

Shit, is it a virus? he growls and presses the back button. Opens the search again... tied up -pain, screams... The page starts, but turns purple again:

Search Shield rised, shadowing is in progress...

No way, the voice growls louder, and the red butterfly flies away. He starts the search again. And when he opens the window tab, is purple:

"Shadowing is finished appears on the screen. Welcome to the world of crimson shades. Based on your browsing data, your profile is as follows: dominant. Favorite styles: fierce dominance, forceful, spanking, bondage (aggressive_sadistic_). Favorites: mature women. Minimal views: feminine males, cute gays.''

Are they spying after me? clenches the strong hand. He continues to read the golden message on the purple background:

"You pay more attention to the subjects. Based on your popular videos, the subjects' faces, and expressions are mandatory during watching them. The path to the goal is stable in terms of the use of modalities: the subject's pleasure must be increasing.''

HM laughs the man They spy on me.

Pop up: The Lord of the shadow world initiated a conversation. Accept it?

Why the hell no? he puts his finger on the button.

"Recognized yourself?" appears on black.

Is there any meaning to deny?

":) No chance. I see you're too broke to get a sub."

A sub? Do you even check my bank account?!

"I also know where you are now. But don't worry, I won't do anything to piss you off."

You already did. Get out my smartphone.

"I'd better tell you my offer. You have a too-good profile to not make me money. So the question is: do you want to become a dominant host?"

Host?

"You can do whatever you want here, with a little kitten, in a room where she can scream day and night as long as you follow the rules."

1. I don't want to be in porn. 2. I do what I want.

"Yes. Master... :) but without rules, the videos you're so passionate about won't work. So... I'll pay you well if you work for us. Don't take it for granted, only if your demons wake up...."

My demons never sleep. 

":D Can I teach you how to control them?"

Chat Closed.

Qoogly maps open.

Your location is found.

Destination... SHC, writes the smartphone, Route planning...

The Creation of a God

––––––––

The Demons are not hidden under the bed, 

They dance in our minds, haunting our souls through sleepless nights.

Our Demons will never leave us...

When they play with other people's demons, snarling at each other giving them what they crave... they at last rest...

In our beds...

In the silence of the dark...

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After many years...

Shadow's Hostess Club in New York City's long-running underground club. So what's there to know? Follow me! Let me hold your hand if you're scared...

This old garment factory building is a short distance from the city center. It's a secluded spot for some, but others know exactly where it is. Shadow's Club is simply a hostess club. Yes, the club where the wealthy can order beautiful, model-like, doll-faced escorts. Of course, that's not all it is.

You enter the red and gold mood lighting and you are greeted at the reception desk by a bow-tie-clad, shirtless, blonde man. He's Erich. This is all you need to know about him. He's the only employee here serving no one but the boss. He also knows only what he needs to know about you. Your age, your pseudonym, your title, and position. Once you're a one-time guest, you should be aware that your bank account will be significantly shortened. Regular guests can purchase a club card. Club cards can only be acquired with a Membership, and that requires spending money.

So, it is your bank account that rules.

There are two entertainment options. Get involved in the club's pulsating music and dance life, have a seat on a huge leather sofa, drink a fine coffee or perhaps some brandy, contemplate your worries and dreams in the company of a beautiful woman or man...

Or else head for the Maze.

Along the red and black hallway with the red lights, towards a chosen room, where you no longer have to hide your secrets... Where your demons can finally unleash their sins, the instant the light above the door turns red and you enter, sure knowing that someone awaits you inside, someone who doesn't question, who doesn't resist, someone who simply gazes and adores you, satisfying your every desire. No emotions, no attachments, no drama, no blame... Only mind-blowing, frenetic, and intense pleasures.

There are many visitors here. Men... Women... Mostly men... But also women, to indulge their raging sexual dreams. Those who have no interest in a relationship. Successful people, leaders, workaholics, bored with things, and have no nerves for the hassle of a relationship.

Admission to the club is open to everyone, but only people over a certain age can enter the gloomy, shady hallways. The same goes for men. Those who don't feel like leaving their house and want to satisfy their cravings in the comfort of their own home can book a hostess service. The time frame depends on how long the person assigned is available and how long the person paying the club can afford to play.

Let's be clear: this game has two players. For the most part, the people who work here are doing that: providing a service. They have either no other job or they are unable to quit. Usually, they come from the middle class. There are models, athletes, teachers, medics, and politicians who work part-time.

Weird, isn't it?

Do you want to know a secret? The club's doing well... Lots of people are benefiting from the rooms, and the assignments. Many are waiting to reign, or to serve their demons... Yet the shadows in Shadow's lust chamber whisper that Love changes everything...

Yeah, even the demons...

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19th of January 2019.

A young woman wearing hiking boots, skinny jeans, and a fitted T-shirt is standing in the shooting practice room. This is Angelica. Her wavy, chocolate hair is in a high ponytail, her big earphones cover her ears, and her green eyes stare intently at the field.

Start! the guard next to her announces, the green lights on the firing platform light up and then everything comes to life. Though they are mere puppets, they move with fidelity in front of the woman, holding the black gun steady in front of her. An elderly woman walks past. She takes a quick look, and aims, but doesn't fire. A small mother with a child aims without firing, then suddenly a hooded man appears behind them. Quickly Angelica aims at his leg and shoots.

The noise of the gun is not disturbing to her. The headphones protect her ears. A second man appears on the field, looks at her, and aims, but nothing. Then a group of children, followed by a knife-wielding man whose face is distorted and screaming. Shoots at the arm. Then, without stopping, sees another armed man on her right, aiming at her. Shoots, but the camera flashes on the side of the guard sitting next to her.

Shit she curses. She knows she's been hit. Still, since the guard didn't cancel the test, she probably took the alleged shot at a non-vital point. A policeman appears in front of her and drops her hands. After a few seconds, a man jumps out of nowhere, running towards her with a knife. Momentarily flinching, she raises her arms in fright and pulls the trigger!

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––––––––

Silently, Angelica enters the flat holding the license she has received once again. She doesn't have to worry about the papers for a while now.

Entering the kitchen, a blond man with a tall, modeled frame emerges, topless.

Clark, I'm starving she announces, as a pleasant smile appears on the man's lips.

"Dinner will be ready in a few minutes.''

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21st May 2019.

Which lunatic female has done this to you? a friendly voice asks as it prepares another iodine gauze.

Does it matter? asks the dark bearded man in a pale tone, sucking in his mouth from the pain. Sweat is beading on his forehead as the mask-wearing doctor turns to him again.

Put this over there... he says seriously, turning away again and taking a syringe from a drawer. The club's rules strictly ban any master from causing such injuries. Even the Agreement is quite explicit about the restrictions.

I know... the man groans when he gets the injection. The doctor takes the gauze, which is full of iodine and blood, is silent for a moment, then glances into the man's eyes.

I must report this, to Adriana and Erich.

You will not the man announces in a low voice, and gives the doctor a stern look.

You are mad, the doctor says. The man leans on his trembling arms. This harmless movement brings pain to his face.

Fuck! he moans softly.

The shot's going to work, then we'll cut this thing off you! says the doctor getting a sharp cutter ready. I still don't get guys like you to this day... he says quietly. It's this good for you? he asks.

Ta! I don't know either now! the man leans back on the white pillow and takes a deep breath.

It's going to be surgery, as you know. It's a very painful and risky procedure. You will not be allowed to go back into the club for quite a while.

Great, the man sighs glancing at the doctor with his dark eyes.

You should think about changing this lifestyle...

Well, I'll think about it when I'm not in so much pain!

Ooh... This is the beginning, my friend... replies the doctor, pityingly. Believe me, whatever comes after this will make you want to die...

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AAAAAAAH! There is a demented, anguished cry in the dim bathroom of the darkened house. Echoes throughout the deserted rooms, like the deep, wheezing, growling noises that escape the man's throat. With a swelling fist, he clutches at the tiny gray patterned tile wall. Finally, two drops of deep blood slowly drop through the air, directly into the already rosy water.

Ha...fuck... he sighs a deep sob, then turns shakily to the shell. He taps the faucet open, leaning down and slapping cold water into his bearded face. He pauses. Allowing the water to gently wash the sweat off his face, he clenches his eyes tightly shut at the pain that still rages in his body.

Wrapped in a towel, he slowly paces across the spacious room, heading directly for the large window of the bedroom. Breathing shallowly. It feels like agony. Stopping, he presses his fevered forehead against the window's cooling glass. He gazes at the tree looming in the gray courtyard in front of him, battered now by the raging storm outside. The glass reveals his hot breath in an instant. Holding the towel tightly, he only shakes his head, narrowing his eyes. He cannot bear to stand. Fever and pain make his knees buckle until he can hardly sit in the window. Slowly, he draws his knees up, leans on them, and his tears stream freely as his powerful hands run powerlessly through his lush dark hair.

ANGELICA

Sick of all these people talking, sick of all this noise

Tired of all these cameras flashing, sick of being poised

Now my neck is open wide, begging for a fist around it

Already choking on my pride, so there's no use crying about it

I'm headed straight for the castle

They wanna make me their queen

And there's an old man sitting on the throne

That's saying that I probably shouldn't be so mean

I'm headed straight for the castle

They've got the kingdom locked up

And there's an old man sitting on the throne

That's saying I should probably keep my pretty mouth shut

Straight for the castle

Oh, all these minutes passing, sick of feeling used

If you wanna break these walls down, you're gonna get bruised

Now my neck is open wide, begging for a fist around it

Already choking on my pride, so there's no use crying about it

I'm headed straight for the castle

They wanna make me their queen

And there's an old man sitting on the throne

That's saying that I probably shouldn't be so mean

I'm headed straight for the castle

They've got the kingdom locked up

And there's an old man sitting on the throne

That's saying I should probably keep my pretty mouth shut

Straight for the castle

There's no use crying about it

There's no use crying about it

There's no use crying about it

There's no use crying about it

I'm headed straight for the castle

They wanna make me their queen

And there's an old man sitting on the throne

That's saying that I probably shouldn't be so mean

I'm headed straight for the castle

They've got the kingdom locked up

And there's an old man sitting on the throne

That's saying I should probably keep my pretty mouth shut

Straight for the castle

They wanna make me their queen

And there's an old man sitting on the throne

That's saying that I probably shouldn't be so mean

I'm headed straight for the castle

They've got the kingdom locked up

And there's an old man sitting on the throne

That's saying I should probably keep my pretty mouth shut

Straight for the castle...

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5th  August 2019. Thursday

22:50

When one loses faith and trust in someone, they say it is forever. Now, that is bullshit. It's not true. Humans want to believe, to trust, so much, that they always search for clues. What is real, is the doubt. To overcome it, you must prove and earn the trust again.... and always. I have asserted this since the early part of my career. After all, being a lawyer is not easy. At all. Especially in this world. A society that's been re-built. New York... After the shutdown. Perhaps some of you may be familiar with the phrase. Those who don't, in short: Bankruptcy. Banks went bust. Those who were billionaires woke up to discover that they had become broke.

Even today, lawsuits with the major banks are still ongoing. Everyone is defending themselves, of course... A hacker, a stupid employee, or even the charwoman is at the focus of the prosecution. I laugh at that. However, what is fact and truth is that I have been on the bend of this job. I'm not the type of person who runs away from a challenge. No. This is not the way my dear, loving father raised me. No... Ever since I got into this prestigious company, NY L&J. "New York Law and Justice, that's all I've been doing. That was four years ago. Though I must admit, there are a lot of us. I'm, of course, the most junior prosecutor and female.

Only I know the agonizing amount of learning I had to do to get here. The most elite and highest-paying office in New York. So I admit, I'm smiling now, I genuinely don't lack anything, maybe nothing. I think maybe, I will repeat it because I feel that word is relevant. Somehow it always lingers there in the air. It lingers in hit-and-run trials, theft trials, and assault trials. "Maybe... maybe... maybe the victim was careless, maybe... the victim wasn't paying enough attention...

Maybe... is suspicious... is doubtful... And it's always there.

Maybe... HM...

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6th  Aug. 2019. Friday

09:00 AM

Turning the corner slowly to the tall building. Simply a delight to gaze up at it. Huge, and I am working here. Sure, it gives me a certain level of satisfaction. Yeah, I do. I made it here...

I get in the elevator, and a tall fellow stands next to me. He's only wearing a white shirt and linen trousers. I don't look at him as his height bothers me. I wear high heels, but he is at least a head and a half taller than me. It bugs me... Mainly this casualness, when the company policy requires everyone to wear a suit or a suit. He's either a customer... or a customer...

He smells good. Fresh. I lower my head and hide my smile. I like this scent!

On the next floor new colleagues board, making the place less available. It's a long way to the 35th floor... Sardines come to mind. Thank goodness the elevator has air conditioning. Yet it's warming up. Next floor, the man steps closer and leaves a little distance between us. I don't want to look up at him. Better not, I better not...

The elevator stops again and more people board. This is how you can tell which department came early. On the thirty-fifth floor are only the small cases, we say, but over us... there's the Murder Division.

The elevator is full! Thirty-fifth floor is the next stop, the automated voice says, as one of the dazed drops his bag. Everyone moves aside to make room for the colleague. The man is pressing against me, but I place my hand on his chest to protect myself...

Sorry... his deep, spine-tingling voice makes me boil, and I glance up at him. A dark bearded natural brown haired man wearing glasses is staring down at me sternly. He seems to have icy eyes. What I don't want to: feel a rush of desire. The urge to force him to his knees. To fill his mouth with a sexy black ball... A broad smile spreads across my lips, blood rushing to my head...

Oh, woe to you, Mr. Unknown...

The elevator stops. The man smiles at me, and I start to walk out. He's not coming. Strange. When I glance back, what do I see? He is leaning against the mirror with hands in his pockets, sucking on his lips.

Fancy me, puppy? I raise an eyebrow and the elevator door closes. I breathe deeply and tighten the strap of my bag. You're looking forward to a good day, Angelica... Last day of the week... I head for my desk and smile.

Oh, last day... Weekend at last...

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No new cases yet from the Analyst Department. I sort through old files, looking at the clock. Lunch break's coming up... Great. I'm saving things when the little envelope in the corner of my laptop flashes.

From: PhD. G. Flynn - NY L&J CEO.

Addressed to Miss. L. Angelica Stevens -NY L&J Prosecutor -code 00.

Subject: Clare v Hamilton

Miss Stevens,

Attached is the Clare - Hamilton case file.

Good luck.

Is that all? I'm staring at the screen and clicking on the attachments. I shut up right on the first page.

CHARGE: CHILD MOLESTATION SEXUAL ABUSE – PAEDOPHILIA.

It's not a 00-caliber case. After all 00 is for starters, easy cases. This one is a 10th. As described, Mrs. Joanna Clare has reported to the police on more than one occasion because her 8-year-old daughter Vanessa Clare has been regularly molested by her PE teacher. The Child Welfare Office has launched an investigation, although the teacher denies everything. Blaming a vivid imagination, the young girl refers to the abuse as slander.

I'm holding her waist to get the proper bridge done.The child Welfare Officer monitored the family's life. The girl continued to go to school and attend gymnastics practice, but the deputies could find nothing unusual. Meanwhile, the case was closed by the department of police and social services, while the girl was scheduled for a medical visit for her care.

After three weeks, Mrs. Clare and her husband Nathan reported the case again, giving as evidence their daughter's gym