Moonpies, Fireflies, Some Twisted Dreams, Some Truth, and Some Lies: Book Two

By James (Jim) Linn

About the Book
In this memoir and bibliography, combined with philosophy and short stories, James (Jim) Linn has collected twelve years of quotes from others with how they spoke to him, his deep thoughts, some poetry, and thought-provoking memes. Linn also shares his observations about life and human nature.
About the Author
James (Jim) Linn played and managed softball teams, both men’s and co-ed, for forty-seven years. He now enjoys playing pickleball five days a week. In his free time, Linn likes to spend time with his family and friends, travel to Europe and different cities in the US, and learning new things.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Dorrance Publishing Company
• Release date: Sep 12, 2023
• ISBN: 9798888125045

Book preview

Some Truth

Oh, the comfort - the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person – having neither to weigh thoughts nor measure words, but pouring them all right out, just as they are, chaff and grain together; certain that a faithful hand will take and sift them, keep what is worth keeping, and then with the breath of kindness blow the rest away. 

–Dinah Craik, A Life for a Life, 1859

Whoever undertakes to set himself up as a judge of Truth and Knowledge is shipwrecked by the laughter of the gods.

–Albert Einstein

Truth is what is true, and it’s not necessarily factual. Truth does not contradict or deny facts, but it goes through and beyond facts.

–Madeleine L’Engle

Everything we hear is an opinion, not a fact. Everything we see is a perspective, not the truth.

–Marcus Aurelius

Life is filled with illusion, pretending to be truth…

–Unknown

Truth is treason, in an empire of lies.

–Ron Paul

When the elderly die, a library is lost and volumes of wisdom and knowledge are gone.

–Unknown

If you looked down to the bottom of my soul, you would understand fully the source of my longing and – pity me. Even the open, transparent lake has its unknown depths, which no divers know. ―

–Hans Christian Andersen

Men, on the other hand, have a soul which lives forever, lives after the body has become dust; it rises through the clear air, up to the shining stars! ― Hans Christian Andersen, The Little Mermaid ( I choose to believe this. –Jim Linn)

Words intended to heal a wound through a deeper perspective:

"The sandal-tree perfumes, when riven,

The axe that laid it low;

Let him who hopes to be forgiven,

Forgive and bless his foe."

-Sadi

-AND-

Forgiveness is the fragrance that the violet sheds on the heel that has crushed it.

–Attributed or mis-attributed to Mark Twain

-AND-

Forgiveness is a gift you give yourself.

–Luminita D. Sauvic

-AND-

Before you seek Revenge with someone be sure and dig two graves.

–Chinese Proverb

–AND-

The hatred you’re carrying is a live coal in your heart - far more damaging to yourself than to them.

–Lawana Blackwell

–AND-

A truth that’s told with bad intent Beats all the lies you can invent.

-William Blake

–AND-

"Once in a golden hour

I cast to earth a seed.

Up there came a flower,

The people said, a weed."

Alfred Lord Tennyson, The Complete Works of Alfred Tennyson (Just as one person’s trash may be another person’s treasure, and one artist’s discard may be the same, one person’s patch of weeds may be another person’s bouquet. Don’t doubt the quality of that which you have produced from your true heart and soul. There is another who needs to know your deepest, heartfelt treasure. –Jim Linn)

-AND-

"In the Spring a young man’s fancy lightly turns to thoughts of love." ― Alfred Tennyson, Works of Alfred Lord Tennyson (But, for the old man, walking among the blooming dogwoods in May, he remembers what love there was in his youth, which is no more…for it and he have changed. The ravages of time have wracked his body, and grief has ensnared his mind for those lost moments. Yet he may retain a hope that he will, once again, find renewal and redemption in his coming adventures in the next plane. Though I may not be here to see it, rest assured that Spring will once again come, and you will feel its gentle kiss of sun. –Jim Linn

–AND-

"It (the snow) lay thickly drifted on the crooked crosses and headstones, on the spears of the little gate, on the barren thorns. His soul swooned slowly as he heard the snow falling faintly through the universe and faintly falling, like the descent of their last end, upon all the living and the dead." -James Joyce, Dubliners (There is something magical in the near-silence of a nighttime snowfall…the soft, constant pat-pat-pat of flake-upon-flake, building, ever-building, creating a down-like cushion upon the still earth. –Jim Linn)

–AND-

On rare occasions there comes along a profound original, an odd little book that appears out of nowhere, from the pen of some obscure storyteller, and once you have read it, you will never go completely back to where you were before. [ . . . ] The kind of book that echoes from the heart of some ancient knowing, and whispers from time’s forgotten cave that life may be more than it seems, and less. ― E. J. Banfield (Writing that has awakened in some reader a heretofore previously unknown thought can be serendipitous and lead to an epiphany. One never knows what revelations we can awaken in another with our writing, and I don’t view sharing of thoughts as egotism or, as once suggested to me as a form of narcissism, but more like altruism. To judge a writer’s intent for his writing requires a deep knowledge of that writer’s true heart and motivation. As Ralph Waldo Emerson said, He presents me with what is always an acceptable gift who brings me news of a great thought before unknown. He enriches me without impoverishing himself.

Within the following are streams of consciousness which have crossed my mind at different times (sometimes years apart) yet may sound somewhat repetitious. There are events which have scarred and shaped whom we’ve become that are akin to PTSD in that those traumas hit us at an impressionable moment, and we re-visit them (sometimes from slightly different perspectives) to try to make sense of them. Do you have any of those?

There are many truths we know today that we didn’t know a few hundred years ago. Humans thought the world was round until it was seen from a different perspective, from space and the moon, and observed to be ovoid. But before that, it was thought by many to be flat. So truth is not absolute…it evolves with new knowledge, and if we are wise, we realize that our current knowledge has limitations and will continually evolve.

Truth...the ever-elusive, ever mercurial...we find it slipping through our fingers as new facts are discovered. The previous truths were true for a time but must be flexible enough to evolve, with new learning, if our species is to progress.

I’m obsessive and a perfectionist of sorts. I try to do everything to the best of my ability. I fail, sometimes, but not by intent. It takes effort to try not to be. It has a dark side and a light side to it. If you remove it completely to eliminate the negative, you’ll likely also lose the positive aspects as well. I think the answer is to try to temper it. I also do not expect it of others.

My striving for perfection is a fool’s-errand to be sure. It is not due to excessive pride, for perfection is something I am so far from and can never achieve. But it is more of a reflection of a goal I work towards while maintaining an awareness it will never happen. I am not overwrought in this quest, I am motivated by a desire to always do my best or not do it at all. It is not ego but simply earnest effort, perhaps borne from a critical father who left when I was ten. He never looked back, nor do I yearn (any longer) for him. But there was an impact his negativity created and a legacy of valuelessness his indifference instilled. I don’t worry about measuring up to some standard of expectation he may have had, for he is long gone (good riddance). But if there was anything positive I learned from him, it would be a solid work-ethic and a negative lesson from his criticisms, to strive to do the best I can at whatever I do, not for him but for myself. This comes at a price, as does everything, primarily in self-destructive behavior, although I never drank, smoked, or used drugs. But stresses I deal with manifest themselves in nail-biting (or picking at). We each deal with our stresses in our own way, and we must have some outlet.

When you are in pain, take some time to write, paint, or make music…that is when your most authentic self emerges from your own shadows. Express what you are experiencing as best you can…go to the great depths of your soul…whether you ever choose to share your pain or not, keeping in mind it may help someone else if you decide to do so. It can be cathartic.

There are different types of exploration. We’re all too familiar with traveling to strange lands to see what’s there. But, too, some are familiar with traveling to new thoughts and words, to explore new borders of the acceptable, and cross those borders, leaving a comfort zone, to challenge the norms and test others’ limits. This, too, is a form of courage, and people have died in so doing because of whom they’ve offended.

Could be on a tombstone: Sorry, I was out with friends when you dropped by.

Leave a note and I’ll get back with you as soon as I can…don’t wait up…"

Esoterically, the Hanged Man is the human spirit which is suspended from heaven by a single thread. Wisdom, not death, is the reward for this voluntary sacrifice during which the human soul, suspended above the world of illusion, and meditating upon its unreality, is rewarded by the achievement of self-realization. ― Manly P. Hall, The Secret Teachings of All Ages (The Hanged Man, naked above a swirling whirlpool of vast ignorance, superstition, and deceit, helpless until wisdom intervenes. –Jim Linn)

At least half of a deception may be caused by our belief system being deluded. We often see what we wish to see and believe what we wish to be true. This self-deception makes the pain worse when we realize others saw the truth we denied, making us feel foolish on top of being betrayed. Avoiding pre-conceived ideas and working to see more objectively may help prevent us being crushed under the weight of a reality that is forced upon us by those pesky facts.

The point my best teacher instilled in me, he said, "I don’t care if you disagree with me...in fact I want you to, as long as what you are expressing are your thoughts, not your parents’, siblings, friends, or anyone else’s...just yours. That means you are thinking. If you disagree with me, that’s fine, but I want you to have thought about why you believe what you believe."

In our never-ending futile search for constants and stability (and time betrays us here as well, since time is relative as well):

We actually all have different realities. Our reality is based on our perceptions, which in turn are based on our senses, thoughts, experiences, and memories. And let’s not forget, animals have a very different set of perceptive abilities we don’t fully understand, seeing, hearing, and smelling things we know naught of.

What you can see, hear, or smell may be very different than what I can sense, even if we are standing next to each other. When we sense something, if the person next to us can’t, their reality is already different than ours. If we add in the shadings and skew of our thoughts, experiences, and memories (which act as filters), then even our realities can be different to us than the last time we experienced the same stimuli (as in You can never step into the same stream twice -Epictetus).

This life we partake of is at best fragile, yet we risk all for a momentary thrill. Our reality is not just in what our senses perceive outside of us but in the limitless universe which is our mind. Our adventures there are only bounded by our imagination while our experiences outside of us are limited by our abilities.

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It takes a certain courage to care, to risk putting yourself out there. To be willing to suffer the hurt that can come from disappointment or criticism is to demonstrate the strength and nobility of your character.

When my daughter, Julie would go to bat in her fast-pitch softball tournaments, I’d often remind her, Get your money’s worth! Of course it wasn’t about money, it’s about getting the most out of every opportunity when you do anything…in softball or life. –AND- I noted that the first pitch thrown by most good pitchers in Julie’s tournament softball was usually a fat, juicy straight fastball, thigh-high in the middle of the plate, simply because the pitchers knew that most girls would not swing at the first pitch they saw. They wanted to look at one. The problem was that the first pitch was often the best, most hittable pitch they would see. The rest would be a mix of risers, drops, change-ups, and curves, nibbling at the corners of the plate and sometimes off the plate, hoping to get the call from the ump or entice an ill-advised swing.

There is a place in my heart where all those I love, family and friends, dwell. I don’t need anyone’s permission to love them; they’ve simply endeared themselves to me at some point in time. Some may have a little greater part because of the nearness and dearness, but all are cared about for the gifts they’ve given me, which come from the lessons I’ve learned and pleasures I’ve derived from having known them. The moments we’ve shared, either in person or as a result of other forms of communication, have enriched me beyond measure, and I will remain forever grateful. If you feel that I’ve brought a measure of joy, or a smile, or a measure of enrichment, I am delighted to have done for you what you’ve done for me.

Sometimes when you step back a distance from a task that seemed too large and insurmountable when you stood before it, you can put it into a new perspective and see that which you missed when you were too close. It is then that new approaches may be seen, and solutions for new actions may be taken.

A good book evolves in its meanings, as does the reader. That’s one of the many beauties in life. That’s why the many references to You never step into the same stream twice, or You can never (really) ‘go home’ again. The inherent melancholy, yet simultaneous awakening it invokes makes our moments in our finite life more meaningful. If we are wise, we should cherish all...the good and the bad for the lessons they both impart.

Through many dangers, toils and snares, I have already come. Tis grace has brought me safe thus far And grace will lead me home.

–John Newton, from Amazing Grace

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If my slow pattern of speech suggests to you I’m a slow-thinker, you may have not accounted for the fact that I always want to measure my thoughts and say what I mean. I choose my words carefully and rarely mis-speak. By taking my time to formulate my perspectives, I believe I can present them more clearly and succinctly.

I was having a conversation with our softball team manager, Jennifer, this afternoon and I mentioned I’ve recruited some great ball players for my softball teams at the batting range (right, Nanci?!), and Jennifer chuckled. I told Jennifer I used to be shy, but as I’ve gotten older, become less so...and that my window of shame is getting smaller. What I meant by that is that the number of years I will have to live with shame or embarrassment from a rejection is growing shorter with each day, so I’ve learned to go for it, as our other manager Katie once said to me I should do when I hugged her hello. Getting older does have some advantages because you are less fearful of social faux pas because they are more likely to cause amusement (as in look at that old goat goin’ for it with the hugs!) than offense. Let’s face it, we ain’t gettin’ any younger, and if we don’t give and receive hugs freely now, then when?! So for all my friends, please know I welcome hugs and shoulder pats because they are a precious part of this life, and they do make a difference! Thank you, and now I’ll shut up and go back to my senility...

Our world has become callous and de-sensitized to civility, manners, morals, and respectful behavior. Sad, but people have trouble even understanding those concepts or their own part in the destruction of those values.

Did you see The Matrix? It begs the question, Are you awake or asleep? How do you know? It could be that, as in the movie, we have all our needs met by a monstrous machine we are plugged into without our knowledge (and in a coma), like some parasite draining our life-force, that tells us we are conscious and experiencing everything our senses can detect, but it could all be artificially fabricated.

To be a climbing rose

With fragrant flower

And dreadful thorns

Higher and higher

Peeking above the wall

To catch the sun’s last rays

Before the darkness falls.

Idle (or Idyll) Musing…

It is said, What others think of us is none of our business, and I largely agree. What they think of us is based on their knowledge of only a relatively small sample-size of who we really are, and then it’s been run through their filters, prejudices, perspectives, and emotions before it comes to an evolving impression. But have you ever wondered how you appear or come across in your various relationships? Do people like your sense of humor, bluntness, or even possibly obtuse nature? Perhaps you couldn’t care less, and that’s fine, too. However, under the category of trying to become the best version of yourself, and not simply comparing oneself to others but more in an evolutionary, self-improvement sense, it could be useful to know what others see when they get to know you.

It is also said that you will not find out as much from a friend as from an enemy (or adversary), and perhaps the only way you may get a true-window is if you come back to your own memorial service. You probably won’t get pure truth from those who’d care enough to speak, for they are often the ones who loved you most. No. You have to waft around among those in attendance and hear their mumblings, mostly under their breath, as the speakers share their perspectives about you and the life you lived. The ad-lib commentary, one guest to a carefully vetted other, be they friends, family, couples, or acquaintances, would likely be the most honest thoughts and opinions to be offered at a whisper, for few want to be caught speaking ill of the dead.

Hollywood loves the grand gesture for dramatic effect of a person speaking out at a funeral or memorial service of undying love (or hate or of some indiscretion) of or by the deceased, but that rarely happens in real life. Most prefer to let sleeping dogs lie and move on, as those grand gestures rarely bring closure or salve wounds from previous relationships or interactions. Probably we’ll never know how we are remembered or thought of by those who’ve known us, and since those experiences and relationships were in the past and locked in mist-enshrouded stone, they are what they were, or what they were remembered as, with the softening of the sometimes gentle, gracious hand of time.

A Vignette

When he died, it left a hole in the world, an unfillable void…not just for me but for anyone who ever met him. It was as if goodness went with him. I see it like a jigsaw puzzle with a jagged piece, right in the center, missing. No denying it, he was such a presence…he made a difference, she lamented. He looked sympathetically at her, and remained silent, to give her the chance to get it out.

He’s up there, she said, pointing up.

You mean in Heaven? he asked gently. I mean in the heavens. Metaphorically I see him as one of those millions of twinkling stars, winking a message to me, from his place in the night sky. It’s a message of love and a promise…that he is not really gone but always watching over me. He is a blinking star who’s left this plane and waits for me in the next one, she stated matter-of-factly. I find peace, comfort, and assurance in that thought, her voice tailed off but seemed calm and perhaps even a bit happy.

Sometimes we walk away from a true love, never realizing what we’ve given up. That person who would never betray us, who loves us in good times and bad, always watching our back. That rare person who, if looked at honestly, could’ve been right for us because both people are evolving, simultaneously, and will be different in some ways later. But their unique, core values that made them that person we once loved are still there.

Searching through all the deepest recesses of our conscious and unconscious mind to learn all the mysteries contained therein; plumbing our soul for its secrets, both the pure and the dark, identifying our heart’s deepest feelings and yearnings, condensing all these thoughts and feelings and then...articulating them! Perhaps this is the immortality many of us wish for. The notion that we could envision and grasp the essence of life, formulate it into an understandable concept, find just the right words to clearly express it and offer it to all mankind for human salvation.

Some interesting archaic words and their definitions:

Philophobia: The fear of either falling, or being in love.

Apodyopsis: This is a Greek word that means the act of undressing someone with one’s eyes.

La douleur exquise: It’s a French term that occasionally found itself being used in English. Its actual literal translation means the feeling of exquisite sadness, and it describes the agony of being in love with someone that you can never have.

Anaxiphilia: This word is the literal term for the tendency of falling for guys who are bad for you. In other words, if you tend to like guys who are totally incompatible with you, or if you tend to have crappy boyfriend after crappy boyfriend.

Tacenda: This is a plural noun that describes all the words that are best left unspoken. Example: There is a tacenda between the two of them, which only they can understand.

Petrichor The mild and pleasant smell or scent of earth associated with the first rain after a dry spell.

Mångata (n.) (Pronunciation: moon-gah-ta) Swedish word: The glimmering roadlike reflection of the moon on the water.

Koi no yokan (n.) Pronunciation: koy-noh-yo-kin Origin: Japanese

Definition: Literally translates to premonition of love; The extraordinary sense one has upon first meeting someone that they will one day fall in love

Vacilando (v.) Origin: Spanish

Definition: To wander or travel with the knowledge that the journey is more important than the destination.

Monachopsis (n.) Pronunciation: mona-chop-sis, MON-a-Cop-sis Origin: Greek

Definition: The subtle but persistent feeling of being out of place, not fitting in.

Eunoia (n.) Pronunciation: yoo-noy-iea Origin: Greek

Definition: Beautiful thinking; A well mind.

Brumous (adj.) Pronunciation: bru·mous Origin: Literary English

Definition: Of gray skies and winter days, filled with heavy clouds or fog.

Sassafras: an herb, later proven dangerous; in the 1800’s it was used as a bar-drink, like birch beer or root beer, and sometimes called sasparilla. In the 1960’s, a western TV show called Sugarfoot, Will Hutchins who played the namesake character would order Sasparilla with a dash of cherry, at the bar.

Sarsaparilla: an herb with beneficial qualities; not to be confused with sasparilla.

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When you dare to walk beyond your comfort zone, crossing over into unknown territory, this is the moment real adventure begins. Have no illusions…it is not guaranteed to be safe, for if it was, there’d be no real adventure to it. Real life is not some Disneyland ride with twists and turns but guaranteed to come out safely at the end. Oh, no. When we decide to actually live, it means we must again be prepared to learn new things and find solutions to challenges we will encounter. Remember: Nature has no agenda, she just is, so forget manufactured Hollywood happy endings and understand you’ll have to make your own. If you do this and feel a gnawing uncertainty, that is real and good because you’ve begun to grow. Now to survive. Those who’ve become complacent, and want to take no risk, have died already…they just haven’t realized it yet.

When I worked at the second coin store, which I did for thirty years, I had several epiphanies about human nature. One of them involved those people we referred to as gypsies. There is a loosely known group of travelers who go from New York (in the fall) to Florida and return to New York in the spring, making stops of opportunity all along the way to play their cons and scams on unsuspecting prey. Most good folks say what they mean and mean what they say, but there is another element out there who will use any play they see to relieve their victims of their money and valuables, whether by con or by outright theft. If they see you in your front, side, or back yard weeding, they may brazenly walk right in your open front door and steal your sterling, purse, wallet, money, or jewelry (I know of this happening to someone in our area)…targets of opportunity. If confronted they always have a clever, ready excuse as to why they’re in your home uninvited. It might be that they knocked and no one answered and their car broke down, or there was an emergency and they needed to use your phone. They have told this lie so often, it rolls off their silky tongue like the truth. But make no mistake…they never are whom they say they are. It’s all just a big game. They probably have multiple ID’s (none of which are valid) and are clever and glib. They live off their wits. We forget that we have a thousand things on our minds…family, friends, jobs, home, and much more. They have only one thing on theirs…how to beat you. They think, plan, and scheme 24/7 to achieve their nefarious goals. While your thoughts are relatively unfocused due to your myriad responsibilities, theirs are laser-sharply focused. That puts you running a distant second if they catch you unawares.

I had one who may have just been serving his apprenticeship who came into our store. I was suspicious because he matched the stereotype: looking around at all kinds of valuable things, seeing if there were weaknesses in our store security or personnel. He may have started with several potential scams in mind when he came in to test us, and not seeing an easy play, opted for a money-based scam. He went with a deal. He asked if he could lock in the price for a one-ounce gold coin with a deposit and pick it up and pay the balance a few days later. I said I could do that for him if the deposit was cash, and non-refundable (as we were committing this gold coin to him, and would have to order one to replace it based on that price)…$100 to be exact, for a $1,000 final purchase price. I told him that the balance of $900 would also have to be cash only. He said that was acceptable, gave me the cash deposit required. I wrote out those exact terms on his receipt and had him sign it in agreement.

When the pick-up date came around a few days later, he showed up at 5 P.M. with a cashier’s check for $900, I said, This is not what we agreed to. We agreed to cash!

He said, But this is a cashier’s check…it’s the same as cash.

I said, No…this is a piece of paper with words but not cash. He said it was all he had. I said, Why didn’t you take this into the bank and get cash for it? He said he was running around, didn’t have time, and that this was as good. I said it was not what he signed a receipt agreeing to. When he realized I was not going to give in, he asked if he could have his deposit back. I said no because he’d agreed it was non-refundable. So he had one more hour before our closing time to get the cash, to complete the transaction as mutually agreed upon, or forfeit his deposit. He left. As it turned out, he went up the street to another coin shop, bought a one-ounce gold coin from them (by adding in another $100 out of his pocket and giving them the cashier’s check). He then ran down to the bank and told them the merchant had reneged on his transaction, and he demanded they stop-payment on that cashier’s check. The bank did so and gave him a refund. When the check was later presented by the other coin dealer, the bank told them it had been stopped. The dealer correctly advised them they could not do that and, after much to-do, they honored it and ate their loss. So the gypsy got his coin…it cost him $200 for a $1,000 coin, the other dealer did get reimbursed, and the bank got beaten. We made $100, legally, for nothing. But there were some hard lessons learned.

Gratitude is a part of grace, and humility is another part...

A different version of you exists in the minds of everyone who knows you… –Unknown (And this includes friends, romantic partners, and even our relatives, not to mention who we think we are. Let’s not forget that all of those perceptions will change over time, as well. –Jim Linn)

Just like a great song, so many great memories can be wrapped up in a car. Some might not understand this. It can reach way back into our youth or connect us with a moment in time. It may have been that first car, or it may have been that dream car...who is to judge? For me there were two cars: a fire-engine-red 1965 Ford Galaxie convertible (the first car I bought used with my own money in 1967, for $1,500, from earnings cleaning swimming pools, etc.), and in 1983, a Datsun 280 ZX...a wonderful car! The stuff dreams are made of...

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The invisible wind wends its way through the waving fields of winter wheat, reminding us of how, like our faith, there are things that exist that we cannot see.

Be the kind voice that whispers its truth to those around you. It is not necessarily what others want to hear, but it just may be the words they need to make their lives better. This is not the notion that arrogance brings, that you can fix others, but with your positive thoughts, you can give encouragement to others to keep going when they’ve lost hope. You are not defeated until you give up...keep moving forward, but do so using all your intelligence, skills, and awareness for there are always obstacles. And while those obstacles are some of life’s unending hurdles, they only become roadblocks if you let them. Remember, over, under, around, or through...never quit on yourself...there is usually a way, and you must find and work towards it. Think outside the box, try things no one else has yet tried. As Thomas Edison said, I have not failed 10,000 times, I’ve just found 10,000 ways something won’t work. Sometimes finding a way one thing doesn’t work may inadvertently show you a way something else might work, if you would only see and remember it. Every new experience and effort is a new opportunity to learn and grow...don’t overlook the lessons offered.

Albert Einstein said, We cannot solve problems by using the same kind of thinking we used when we created them. The intuitive mind is a sacred gift and the rational mind is a faithful servant. We have created a society that honors the servant and has forgotten the gift.

-AND-

The intellect has little to do on the road to discovery. There comes a leap in consciousness, call it Intuition or what you will, the solution comes to you and you don’t know how or why.

–Albert Einstein

-AND-

Certainly there are things worth believing, but if you ask me to prove what I believe, I can’t. You know them to be true but you could spend a whole lifetime without being able to prove them. [ . . . ] There comes a point where the mind takes a leap—call it intuition or what you will—and comes out upon a higher plane of knowledge, but can never prove how it got there. All great discoveries have involved such a leap. –Albert Einstein (And this is what I mean when I add to Donald Rumsfeld’s quote, There are known knowns; there are things we know we know. We also know there are known unknowns; that is to say we know there are some things we do not know, and there are also unknown unknowns - the ones we don’t know we don’t know. He left out Unknown Knowns, and I believe that is where intuition lies. –Jim Linn)

We should be ever-mindful that in trampling on someone’s core belief, we could be damaging a part of what makes them, at least in their mind, who they are. You are suggesting to them, "there is no there there…the person they see themselves as simply does not exist. You may involuntarily invalidate their life and change them, with your critique, from a person you were connected to on some level to a stranger you no longer know. Not everyone may be as strong as you, and that’s what makes new acquaintances and friends fascinating...their differences from us...and it’s better that we don’t try to make them be more like us. –AND- Have you ever heard someone say, There is no ‘there’ there? Or I’m going there to find myself? But where is there? Is it a place or simply a state of mind? I contend that its borders are only our perceptions, and they are not concrete, finite places at all. Others likely have a very different expectation of where there is. To them it may be a wish or dream of what they hope will be, and they want to find that missing element. I once thought there was a place in a relationship where both people were equally committed to a love that was deep, loyal, and true for all times. Having grown up in a broken home, that notion of stability and certainty had great importance and appeal to me, and it was what I sought after. I hoped that she felt the same, but what I realized was since she didn’t come from the same background, her there" was quite different and her needs were also very different. I came to realize eventually that the depth of our relationship was a reflection of my perception, and I imposed that expectation on her. But relationships are more about giving and receiving what each is capable of from the other. I came to realize also that what she was offering in depth was very limited, mostly by her unwillingness to be truly open and caring.

She once said to me, You always cared more about everything than I did. Caring about others deeply was how I chose to live my life, but she wasn’t going to make that investment. She may have been afraid, I suppose, of the pain that losing that connection would cause, so she chose to fly above the emotions and not dive into them. I came to understand that there was nothing there for me in that place and that it was best to try to move on, chalking that experience up to life lessons. Perhaps we’re all searching, in some way, for our ever-elusive there. But once we relinquish our expectations of discovering it, perhaps that is when we first actually arrive to find it.

A quote about gratitude and recognizing blessings before they’re gone. Have you ever had someone who came into your life and was good to you, with no expectation of getting something in return? Maybe...just maybe they were an angel who came into your life and helped you in some way...materially (with an act of generosity or kindness) or spiritually lifting you when you needed a hand. Try to think back and identify that soul who was there for you...and know you are blessed. Sometimes when you can’t think of anyone, it’s because you aren’t thinking hard enough or aren’t in the right frame of mind to appreciate your blessings. That’s okay...perhaps one day you will be...like the following quote suggests: The golden moments in the stream of life rush past us and we see nothing but sand; the angels come to visit us, and we only know them when they are gone -George Eliot (Marian Evans).

Many of us have been visited by an angel. They may have been wearing ordinary street clothes, and we might not recognize them. But they may have touched us with a kind word, a smile that brightened our day, or some act of unselfish kindness....We might have seen it immediately or not recognized their kindness until later...sometimes much later. Sometimes we got a benefit but were too self-absorbed to notice. If we didn’t see it, it doesn’t mean it didn’t happen...we just need to look at things better/deeper/more honestly. Once we recognize one or more angels have visited us, be they two-legged or four-legged, we should make an effort to act like an angel in someone else’s life...with a smile, a kind word, or act of kindness.

Have you ever painted or drawn a picture with a jigsaw puzzle edge, that when you put the pieces together, the picture makes sense, but without all the pieces, they’re just fragments? I think it’s a metaphor for a person...we never really know the whole person...we only know the portion we know, yet there is so much more! And a wonderful part of life is discovering depth we knew not of in another person...that’s a journey in itself.

Art is not just for what you put on the canvas...it’s a developed skill...art...that you cultivate a philosophical approach that you can infuse into your art. I’m sure you already know this, but whether it’s painting or music, without your heart and soul, it’s simply paint and canvas (or in music, just notes). It is said that a painted portrait is not of the subject but rather of the artist.

The inherent ambiguity of words has given rise to a whole cult of interpreters we call lawyers and judges. They rant on, and wax prophetically and incessantly, to prove even the most innocuous points, all the while the billable dollars go ca-ching! They establish precedents in one case, then are forced to find the loopholes in the walls they built for the next client. It creates a business opportunity. But when we elect these people to make our laws, we invite this love and lust for nit-picking and ambiguity into our very communities and de-value our lives by embracing their litigious nature. Remember, when someone wants you to sign the contract they proffer, it was written by their lawyer for their benefit, not yours! Also, remember there is the letter of the law and the spirit of the law, and while you might know one, you may not know both, so the average person is at the mercy of a lawyer who knows the precedents that have been established, and they will use those against you.

The anticipation of impending revenge by someone you’ve wronged may be more painful than the actual retribution they inflict on you.

I wore your promise on my finger for one year I’ll wear your name on my heart till I die Because you were my boy, you were my only boy forever. ―

—Coco J. Ginger

My feeling that girls I was attracted to were out of my league was usually my fault, not theirs. I didn’t have the self-confidence, nor believe I had anything to offer anyone, beyond my sincerity and humility, to allow me to seek out relationships having been, in my mind, a social outcast. Truth be told, it’s quite possible most teens suffer from some degree of this while some throw caution to the wind and say Damn the torpedoes…full speed ahead!

In the stillness of the night, when my ghosts haunt me and my regrets cascade down upon me, and errors of omission and commission bubble up in my mind, I dream of my home and the solitude and peace my imaginary mountain cabin promises.

The psychiatrist said, If I could take away your painful memories and eliminate your sadness and fears, you’d likely no longer be the person you are…loving, caring, and compassionate. You gain something but, in every gain, there is a loss and sometimes the loss is greater than the gain. The pain you’ve suffered and the losses you’ve endured all contribute to one’s ability to understand and empathize with others, and that makes you very special in this world of indifference.

We live from moments to minutes, to hours, to days, weeks, months, and years, but all the time passes like a newsreel, with little memory of the feelings we experienced. However, every once in a while, we get a little tickle…a tantalizing whiff of a feeling when we hear a connective song or discern a provocative scent on the breeze.

You can only know the facet of her being she chooses to show you...and then you try to interpret what you see and may still get it wrong. This is why we never really know another person, no matter how hard we try. We run our limited knowledge of them through the filters of our own experiences and thoughts and come to our own conclusions and then we project our perceptions and fantasies onto them, no matter if they’re true or not, so as to give ourselves a measure of comfort...it’s called being human. And this is where many misunderstandings and disappointments emanate from...

It is through perspective, introspection, and experience that we gain wisdom from knowledge.

I’ll ride in on a sunbeam, whisper words of love in a song, smile with a gentle wink, hold your hand tenderly, brush your hair from your eyes, wipe away your tears, offer a shoulder to rest your head, protect you with strong arms, and will steal your heart away and always be true.

As he sang his melody of love to her, she responded with her own descant of doubt.

In a window display, the spaces between the objects often speaks as loudly as the objects themselves.

You sowed the seeds of your own destruction...now you reap the bitter harvest...

We are accountable for the harm we cause when we choose not to do something we could’ve done. Choices to do, or not do, carry consequences. Sometimes intended and sometimes un-intended consequences. We are constantly having to decide if the way forward we choose does more or less damage than doing nothing. Then we must live with it.

The love may last, albeit in another form, if the relationship ends. Some feelings are too strong to die. And sometimes it’s about the lessons you’ve learned, not only about another but about yourself, as a result of that love you shared. It’s the understanding that everyone loves differently, even though we’d prefer to think that everyone loves the same as we do. But they don’t. They love the way they love, limited by their own capabilities. It’s the knowledge you glean that some people invest more of themselves while others maintain an emotional distance from a true immersion into love because they either aren’t willing to pay the price losing it will exact, or they are too self-protective to truly trust or fully open up and become vulnerable to anyone else.

We may not fully appreciate that the television is an evil, manipulative tool that will control the thoughts of those who prefer to be fed comfortable lies. Polls, too, are manipulative tools to influence our thoughts, if we allow them to do so. If I wanted to influence an audience with a poll, I would go to an area where I am quite certain people will mostly have an opinion that favors my selected outcome. I will include the most intelligent comments in the media to promote my agenda and delete those who don’t sound convincing. After editing out those who do not support my chosen narrative, I would then include one person, preferably someone who sounds unbalanced or radical, and use that person as the counter-voice, knowing he will scare the audience and turn them against that deranged individual’s favored group.

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That is when you finally realize what it meant when they said to you, It’s not you…it’s me. It quite possibly never was you, about anything. You were ever only a performer for a scene in their life’s play. Once they used you for their own purposes, they’d cast you aside as collateral damage and keep on going their way. It was all, always, and only about them, and it was never your fault…you just thought (a delusion) they thought like you thought and felt, but they were incapable. That was your innocent and naïve mistake. But you learned a lesson that projecting your way of thinking onto another is folly.

And the doubts began to creep in about whether what you thought you had were really there, or were they your self-serving, eminently comfortable delusion? From there you begin to doubt your grasp of reality and your ability to discern. Then you begin to lose your self-confidence in trust…not only trust in others but in your own ability. That’s when you become truly shaken because after all, who can you trust if you no longer trust yourself?

Sometimes all we really believe in is the idea of being in love, which is much simpler and a lot less messy than dealing with a real person in a relationship. The fantasy of being in love allows us the opportunity to create fantasies about someone, projecting our dream-lover onto them rather than allowing them to be whom they really are, warts and all.

And sometimes it’s not the person you miss so much as the feeling you had when you were with them. It may even be the feeling about who you were in that earlier time, perhaps more innocent and even naïve. That relationship might be a bookmark for a more carefree time in your life you wish you could re-capture.

When we suffer an abandonment from a once-lover, and the abject sadness grips our soul, we hope for a Hollywood-type follow-on or happily-ever-after ending, which is unlikely to ever come. With our dreams incinerated, and a hollow abyss before us, we wonder if going on is worth it, or should we just end it all. But truth be told, that betrayal may well have been a gift we hadn’t seen coming, for either she or fate was wiser than our heart and knew of the folly of that union.

I hear you, when you whisper, when you moan, when you cry. It all matters because if you can’t express your emotions, you suffer the agony of indifference and feel totally isolated.

May your thoughts be free of inhibition

May your words be free of deception

May your actions be free of malice

May your eyes see beyond the obvious

May your ears not only listen, but hear

May your mouth speak words of kindness

May your mind consider all choices

May your heart be free of hate

May your soul be free of evil

May your integrity be unwavering

May your humility keep you grounded

May your courage always fight injustice

May your blessings be appreciated

May your curiosity keep you questioning

May your conscience be free from guilt

May your intelligence be ever-challenging

May your feelings be empathetic

And may your days be filled with love

She had a mysterious kind of otherness about her. Like a woman I didn’t, couldn’t, and quite possibly shouldn’t know. She dwelt in storms, clouds perpetually swirling around her, and sorrow seemed her constant companion. Her mind was unfathomable and inscrutable, and when logic, common sense, and reason might dictate a particular course of action, she might go the opposite way, being totally unpredictable, and make it work. If a relatively sane man were being chased by lawmen, for example, and was cornered at the top of a seventy-five-foot cliff above a forested valley, he might choose to surrender. She, on the other hand, would choose to leap over the edge, crash through the boughs of some seventy-five-year-old pine tree, landing at the base of it on an accumulated bed of piled up pine needles with barely a thud and a few scratches and be emboldened by the lessons learned from her wing-and-a-prayer experience.

I can’t take just my mother’s side or just my father’s side (for truth lies somewhere in between), but I can build a fire in the middle we can all sit around and make a meal and have a good conversation, to try to find common ground.

There is nothing wrong with dreaming big for some, albeit a very few will achieve stardom. But a dose of reality is also in order. If you chase a dream, you may discover your life has ebbed away and you may wind up empty-handed with no home, family, or real abiding love. A reality-check is made to remind you that you mostly only hear stories of the great success, which is actually an aberration and not the norm…not what happens to the vast majority of dreamers. If everyone could do it, it would not be a great achievement, it would just be the norm. No. What makes excellence (and rightfully so) is the rarity of achieving it, which mostly only the best of the best attain. For every athlete who makes it to the Major Leagues in baseball, there are thousands who languish for years in the minor leagues, riding buses to small towns across the country, pursuing that dream many young boys have, and sacrificing their chance for a quality outside-of-baseball life.

In every group of men, there is an Alpha male. In a military unit, it may not be an officer in charge. He’ll usually be the guy rallying the troops, giving orders, placing the men in defensive positions, or leading the men from the front. It may be the non-commissioned officer, (or sergeant) and as a sniper, you want to pick him off first. This will often cause some at least momentary chaos, allowing you to identify the next guy who steps up to take charge…Picking off the first two leaders may dishearten the remainder and will certainly impact on unit morale. It may not end the fight, but it will strike fear and doubt into your enemies.

Maybe you don’t see people looking at you simply because you don’t look at them. If you’re looking always at your phone or down, you may be missing making contact with a person who might become your best friend or soul-mate.

If you are not listening to others because you either aren’t taking an interest, or you’re busy talking and promoting your point of view, you may be missing out on information that you need to hear and that would help you grow. Many hear, few really listen.

If you never touch another person’s hand, or arm, or shoulder during a conversation, you may be missing something that both of you need, want, and crave but are too inhibited to ask for…human contact. We’ve become so self-absorbed, we’ve forgotten how to genuinely hug and substitute air-hugs, we’ve struggled to communicate on all these levels, and we even use air-quotes to remain politically correct (which is fascism!) rather than just saying what’s on our mind. We can re-capture these skills, if we try hard to break out of the mold society has forced us into. We can return to being genuine, sincere, real people…but it will take work, commitment, and involves some risk for not everyone has awakened to this awareness. This is a revolutionary challenge. We need to do it, one person at a time. Not every person is receptive, and we must respect that. Determining who is, and who is not, is the difficult part. In this technological age, we are racing to become technology rather than human. We’re throwing our souls away to become automatons. We are embracing The Matrix rather than resisting it.

The more men know, of broken bones and bears, the more fearful they become… preferring a serene fireside and a cup of tea, to an outdoor adventure, and a climb up a tree.

Have you ever thought you heard someone calling to you, either as you were just waking up or just falling asleep, there in that surreal twilight of the unconscious-consciousness…when the mind’s sky is neither fully light nor fully dark, and you feel certain you hear someone addressing you? Sometimes you awaken with a start, and other times, due to exhaustion, you slip into your dreams, and the conversation may continue unencumbered. The ghost-voice entreats, and the logical mind acquiesces. There is an element of mystery here, and you might be approaching a creative moment where your thoughts are open to make magic…if you can only listen and remember.

Stealing your dreams is one thing, but don’t let them steal your hope and eat your soul, too…

By controlling (through shaming and criticizing) what people are allowed to say, you begin to stifle their ability to think independently and critically. And if you give this manipulation an honorable-sounding name, like political correctness, you hide its insidious and devious nature, especially from the naïve do-gooders.

Those who throw shade on my dreams, and heap criticisms thereon, are my motivators. They try to discourage, as an enemy would, even when they feign friendship out of jealousy or enmity. When they say my dream of sharing my thoughts, poetry, memes, or quotes are narcissistic, I say, I’m not writing and sharing for you, I’m doing this to get a burning coal out of my soul. If you want to read it, and perhaps learn something, fine. If not, don’t. Your desire to remain ignorant reveals your lack of depth and character.

The problem with morality, principles, and values is that everyone has their own understanding of right and wrong, and we’re all different. Some people don’t believe in any rules for acceptable behavior while others are fundamentalist and strict. The rest are somewhere on a continuum, and it seems no one likes to be told how to behave and act civilized. So we evolve in no common agreement about what we should do in relation to one another at home, in our communities, or in the world. This becomes a breeding ground for distrust, hostility, and aggression.

If we wish to find offense, we needn’t look too hard. Victimhood is the hood too many people choose to live in. It requires less effort than understanding and resolving. It is non-productive and deleterious.

It’s critically important to always do one’s best to give credit where it is due. When we quote others, it steals nothing from us to always attribute as correctly as possible, and it’s a testimonial to our character and personal integrity to do so. When you see a quote I have posted, whether it be mine or someone else’s, feel free to add your truth, value, or meaning…how it spoke to you, as I have done. You may prefer your own choice of quotes to do this with, as you should. What you choose is a window on who you are and what you feel.

What we get out of life, and relationships, is directly proportional to what we put in. If we’re not finding that spark of divinity in another, we may want to check our own flint.

"Normalize not bringing up a relatable story about yourself when someone is telling you something about themselves, and just listen." -Unknown (Listening to others shows respect. Too often we not only feel unseen, but also unheard. And, normalizing is a form of rationalization and often justification, as it slides your bar of personal integrity and acceptable standards toward more self-serving and questionable behaviors. –Jim Linn)

There isn’t anyone who has lived for some time in this world who hasn’t acquired some scars. Some have them on the outside, some on the inside, and many have some in both. The only ones who pretend they don’t are either in denial or refuse to be honest about them. Scars are actually a sign of growth, however painful. When we speak of growing pains, we could just as easily be acknowledging scars. At first they may appear ugly when they are seen, but if we get to know and care for the person, they fade and often disappear into the background of insignificance. That person need not be defined by their scars, as they are only speedbumps in the path of life, and need not be roadblocks unless we allow them to be.

If you’ve spent an hour closely watching our politicians, you’re gonna feel like you need a bath!

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Since we typically can’t force someone to do what we say is best, we can only hope to plant a seed and let them decide if they wish to water and nurture it. By offering a parable, if the person you share it with thinks on it, sees the lesson enclosed within it, and internalizes it, incorporating it into their own chosen behavior, it has served its purpose. For real growth must come from within each of us to be beneficial. But even a sound parable, just as with a teacher, can’t teach the student who isn’t ready.

Who we are is a product of all our history…perhaps not just from this plane but in our warehouse we call our DNA, from all the planes we’ve experienced before arriving here.

Just as the inexorable waves, like time, erode our physical being, they continually expose new layers through the experiences survived and offer wisdom in return, if we are wise enough to recognize it mixed in among the detritus of our travails.

It is invaluable to develop the ability to look beyond the surface, to look at the root of a problem for a better solution, to see the source rather than just the symptoms of the disease, to understand the law of precedents (when a precedent becomes acceptable to you for the gain it affords you, albeit at others’ expense, when someone you disagree with uses your accepted precedent to your disadvantage, and you feel violated and object, you become a vile hypocrite) and grasp the value of working toward the greater good, not just self-interest. These may seem counter-intuitive but are actually seeds of a higher order of life and thinking than the most base, gutter-dwelling, me-first, selfish, self-centered approach of simplistic, small creatures.