Pardon and Peace: A Sinner's Guide to Confession

By Francis Randolph

Fr. Francis Randolph presents a very positive and practical understanding of the immense value of the sacrament of confession for the modern Catholic. Father Randolph helps the reader to see how the sacrament of confession meets the deepest needs of the penitent on the spiritual, emotional and psychological levels.

Step by step we follow the different stages of the rite, looking at the various elements of the sacrament and what they mean for the average sinner in the box. The author draws on his own experiences, on both sides of the grille, to explain what is actually happening in this sacrament, and why it is so helpful for growing in the love of God and neighbor. Because of so much recent confusion over the nature and purpose of the sacrament, the book tackles the common objections and anxieties over confession, and recommends frequent confession for getting rid of stress and anxiety, and growing in confidence before God.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Ignatius Press
• Release date: Sep 3, 2009
• ISBN: 9781681493725

Book preview

PARDON AND PEACE

PARDON AND PEACE

A Sinner’s Guide to Confession

by

Father Francis Randolph

IGNATIUS PRESS    SAN FRANCISCO

Nihil obstat: Paul McNally, S.T.L., Censor of Books

Imprimatur: + Vincent Nichols, Archbishop of Birmingham

Birmingham, England, 22 February 2001

(This Nihil obstat and Imprimatur declare that this book has been submitted to competent Church authority and has been judged not to contain moral or doctrinal error. No implication is contained therein that those who have granted the Nihil obstat and Imprimatur agree with the contents, opinions or statements therein.)

Cover art:

John Henry Newman asking Fr. Dominic Barberi

to receive him into the one Fold of Christ (LD XI, 6).

Sculpture by Faith Tolkien (1995)

in Blessed Dominic Barberi Church,

Littlemore, Oxford

Photograph by:

Studio Edmark

Wheatsheaf Yard,

High Street, Oxford

Cover design by: Roxanne Mei Lum

© 2001 Ignatius Press, San Francisco

All rights reserved

ISBN 978-0-89870-832-5 (PB)

ISBN 978-1-68149-372-5 (EB)

Library of Congress control number 00-109333

Printed in the United States of America

CONTENTS

I    Through the Narrow Door

II   Bless Me, Father, for I Have Sinned

III   It Is So Long Since My Last Confession

IV   My State of Life Is . . .

V   And These Are My Sins

VI   O My God, I Am Heartily Sorry . . .

VII   For Your Penance, Say . . .

VIII   God the Father of Mercies

IX   Through the Ministry of the Church

X    I Absolve You . . .

XI   The Merits of the Blessed Virgin Mary and All the Saints . . .

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CHAPTER I

Through the Narrow Door

Strive to enter by the narrow door, said our Lord (Lk 13:24). Looking around our church, I can see many doors of different widths; the door back to the outside world is the widest, but the narrowest of all is the one leading to the confessional. And many people do enter through it and, by entering, emerge into a broader space and a wider outlook than the one they left.

What happens when we go through that narrow door? Even those who are accustomed to passing it may still be unsure about exactly what is going on, what benefits we receive through the confessional. There are many who have never been through, to whom the whole idea of confession is strange, frightening perhaps, disconcerting, and unnerving.

Let us try, in this brief guide, to find out the purpose of the sacrament of confession, how it works, why it is so useful to us. Let us look, too, at why some people are so frightened of it; let us try to soothe their anxieties and explain the perplexities that surround this important rite of the Catholic Church.

What Keeps Us from Confession?

Our Lord went on to say that not many succeed in finding their way through that narrow door. Some are nervous that they will say the wrong thing or afraid the priest will say the wrong thing. Some have been so poorly instructed in the faith that they really do not know what confession is all about. Some even of those within the Catholic Church actively oppose the use of the sacrament of confession and resist all attempts to make it more popular. If they are in positions of authority—teachers, catechists, and, yes, even priests—they can effectively block a whole generation from ever discovering what confession is about. They have their reasons. But the Pope thinks differently, and so do the great majority of the bishops, who would like people to have more access to this sacrament and to use it more frequently. Millions of perfectly ordinary Catholics, of they have the opportunity to go to confession, take advantage of it and find it helpful in their lives.

There are, of course, those who resist the invitation to confession because they are too proud ever to admit there is anything wrong in their lives; or too attached to that wrong, so that they are unwilling even to think about changing their ways. There is not a lot one can do about them, except to emphasize over and over again that God is actually on our side: he wants us to be happy; he has shown us the way to avoid unhappiness and is only too willing to help us to follow it. If we really want to be miserable, we are free to be so, but it would be nice if at least we could refrain from making others miserable around us!

For confession, believe it or not, is about happiness. It is about how to get rid of all those nagging feelings of guilt; how to be relaxed and at peace, knowing that God loves us. It is about preserving that peace and happiness throughout this life, with the cheerful expectation that it will be continued in our next.

What Do We Call It?

When people say that there is, or has been, something of a crisis in the sacrament of confession, they refer to the confusion that descended on the Catholic Church, and indeed on the whole world, during the 1960s, a decade that sent ripples of anxiety and bewilderment on to the end of the century. Changes, real or imagined, did a lot to break down the familiar routine of our lives, and one of the results was that in many areas the regular practice of the sacrament ceased. In the last ten years of the century there was a notable revival, but there is still a need to clarify some of the murky misunderstandings that were spread around. That is what this book is attempting to do, at an elementary level, suitable for the ordinary sinner in the street.

For a start there has been confusion over the very name of the sacrament. There are three in common use. The term confession stresses the human activity of the person who wants to be free from the bugbears of life. Penance stresses the effort needed to correct anything that has gone wrong. Reconciliation stresses the return of the wandering sheep to the Good Shepherd and the welcome that God extends to those who come back. Obviously all three names refer to important and valid aspects of the sacrament. However, I feel that to use the name reconciliation exclusively, as became fashionable about ten years ago, obscures the important fact that most of us have never completely broken of four relationship with God at all. We are reconciled, once and for all, by Christ’s death on the Cross: if we have ever fallen completely away from God and the Church, we certainly are grateful for the reconciliation that has brought us back; but reconciliation is not something ongoing in our life. We remain in God’s love; it is just that we know there is always more room for growth. After that initial reconciliation, what we need is continual refreshment and reinvigoration: that is where confession comes in, as well as penance. We need continually to confess that we fall short of what God wants us to be, though we do so in the confidence that God loves us already.

I also tend not to use the phrase sacrament of penance very much, since the word penance can have rather negative connotations in English. We are liable to forget that the word used in the Gospels, metanoia, really means a change of heart, a return, the beginning of a new life, though the Latin word poenitentia carries implications of regret, reparation, and the acceptance of just punishment. Starting a new life does, of course, include regret for the stupid mistakes we made before and a resolution that we will take steps to ensure they do not happen again, but the essence of the action of penance must be the positive acceptance of the love of God. Penance should be a joyful occasion of returning to happiness. And here again, once we have made the fundamental change of life that is implied by our conversion, we will not need to make it again unless we fall seriously away. To a certain extent we do need to make a fresh start every morning, and we do need to see the work of penance extended through our lives. But the regular repeated use of the sacrament is, I believe, more aptly called confession, for nearly all our confessions are a continuation of a smooth progress toward the love of God and neighbor, rather than a series of radically new beginnings.

If, then, I have consistently used the term sacrament of confession in this book, it is not just out of inertia, or to tease the liturgical experts, but because I believe the word confession best sums up what we are about when we talk of the regular use of this great gift of God to humanity.

How Should We Go?

Ever since the imposition of the new rites on the Catholic Church in the 1960s and 1970s, there has also been a lot of confusion over how to go to confession. People were frightened off by the belief that they could no longer go to confession the way they used to. In particular I believe a lot of ordinary people were terrified by the rumor that you now have to go to confession face-to-face with the priest, or in public in front of the whole church. Others, looking for a way out of the whole discipline of confession, seized on rumors that you could go to a collective service where the priest would just speak a few words over the whole crowd and that would be enough. Yet others evaded the issue by claiming that there is no such thing as sin, or that they themselves are so perfect and sinless that they never need regret anything in their lives. Can we get through to them that there just might be something to improve? Our Lord was confronted by a young man who thought he was perfect already, and he challenged him to think again, but the young man went away sorrowfully (Mt 19:16-22). What hope is there that I can say anything effective to those who will not admit their need of grace? But to all those who are simply confused, I can offer the solution: Just try coming back to confession, and see how easy it is.

The great secret is that the so-called new rite of penance has never actually been implemented. In twenty years’ experience on both sides of the grille, I have only once come across someone who wanted to use the new rite in its full form. That was a parishioner who had read about it and thought she would like to try. So we arranged an appointment, and did everything they tell you to do in the book: we chose a Scripture passage and discussed it together; we recited a responsorial psalm; we did it all. It took twenty minutes. At the end of it we both agreed it was less than satisfactory, and it would have been much better to use the twenty minutes in prayer and just have confession in the usual manner.

Private Confession

Private confession is, as its name implies, a private affair between you, the priest, and God. That means that you can make it up as you go along. You can speak in exactly the way that suits you and take as long as is necessary or useful. The only things essential are that you should express your regret for the wrong you have done, that you should be open to the forgiveness and love of God, and that the priest should give you a penance and give absolution in the proper form—and even that is only really necessary if you have been guilty of a serious breach with God.

Nevertheless, most people feel much happier if they have some sort of form or structure to take hold of; they like to have a set pattern. There is a standard pattern of how to go about it, the normal way in which people make their confession, but the priest will happily talk you through it if you have forgotten what it is. There is a surprising variety in the choice of texts you can use for asking a blessing, for introducing and concluding your confession, and for expressing your sorrow for sin. Those who learned to go to confession in childhood tend to continue with the texts they learned then, and the priest can become quite an expert in telling which school or which country a penitent comes from just by the form of words he uses.

This book is arranged to follow the basic pattern of a normal individual private confession, taking the various stages one by one. Most people begin with the phrase, Bless me, Father, for I have sinned, after which the priest gives them the blessing they have just asked for. They continue by saying how long it has been since their last confession and then mention the sins and failings that are bothering them, very much in their own words. When they have finished, the priest can give them the encouragement and advice they need and help them make an Act of Contrition, which is a prayer to express regret for past sin, resolution for the future, and confidence in God’s goodness. The priest will suggest some form of prayer or action they can perform later as a penance or satisfaction and will then give them absolution, the assurance of God’s forgiveness. He may conclude with another blessing, invoking the help of our Lady and the saints.

That pattern of confession has not really changed much over the centuries. The various additions, the Scripture readings, and so on, suggested by the new edition of the Church’s liturgical books may be helpful, but it is obvious most people and priests do not find them so. Nearly everyone is content to stick with what is familiar—and why should they not?

So What Has Changed?

An important change that was introduced at the end of the nineteenth century was to give people the freedom to choose who they would like to hear their confession. This is a very valuable development, and it is unlikely anyone would want to return to the older practice. Every priest is different, and one may suit some people, while another suits others. There is no point in going to the most popular and fashionable confessor if he just does not suit you. It may come as a surprise, then, to find that for most of the history of the Church there was very little choice: parishioners were obliged to confess to their own parish priests; most religious were obliged to confess to their own superiors. Visiting priests and retreat-givers had special permission to hear confessions (and were popular as a result), while those who were genuinely traveling could go to the parish priest wherever they where. All that was changed by Pope Leo XIII, so that everyone now has the right to choose his own confessor. Even enclosed nuns have the right to ask for someone other than their chaplain, and religious superiors are now virtually forbidden to hear the confessions of their subjects. That means that you can choose who suits you best.

Some people prefer to be anonymous in confession, while others like the priest to know them and to be able to carry on the process from week to week. When I had a small country parish I found that very few people ever came to confession, which vexed me until my friend in the large town nearby told me not to worry because they all came to him. His church lay between the parking lot and the shopping center, and people from the whole neighborhood came in on a Saturday for shopping and confession, hoping to be anonymous in a large church. Now that I am in a city-center church I can experience the other side of the phenomenon, as people who are certainly not our parishioners come flooding in on a Saturday.

Another choice that was made available in the I970sisthe choice of whether to speak anonymously through a grille or to sit facing the priest. The introduction of this choice did actually frighten a lot of people away from confession, as they were given the impression that face-to-face confession was now compulsory, and most people did not fancy the idea. In fact it was never compulsory, and when people are really given the choice, most prefer to use the grille. Recently it has become clear that face-to-face confession can cause serious problems, and priests now have the right to insist on a grille. This is because if a priest is enclosed in a small windowless room with one other person, and no witnesses, both priest and penitent are vulnerable to what