Horns (Intergalactic Dating Agency): Colony: Nyx, #4

By Demelza Carlton

Since the Intergalactic Dating Agency opened, Vertumnus has only had eyes for one woman – the one he can't have.  So when Flora comes to him for help, he makes her an indecent proposal, knowing she'll never accept.

Until she says yes…

Flora has always preferred plants to people, but now she's been left to pick up the pieces of her aunt's farm…and the lives of the girls who work there. In desperation, she asks her aunt's accountant for help, telling him she'll do anything to make up for her part in the whole mess.

Well, almost anything…

• Language: English
• Publisher: Lost Plot Press
• Release date: Sep 21, 2023
• ISBN: 9798223143543

Book preview

ONE

Tumnus sighed. He wasn't sure whether he'd be better off taking all of Falcon Han's records and burning them, instead of auditing them. Talk about dodgy accounting, and it wasn't like the crooked bastard was here to answer for...well, he wasn't sure if it was mere ineptitude, or outright fraud. But he needed to get the books in order for the new owner or Hera would make sure something bad happened to him. The new owner was her stepson, after all, and while he might not be a blood relation, he was family, and she'd made it clear to disrespect her family was to insult her personally.

If he was feeling kind, he'd say the numbers were drunk. Maybe he should burn the books, and be done with it. Normal people kept electronic records, instead of stray pieces of paper in a drawer, covered in illegible scribble. But if the late Falcon Han had an heir, he needed to know if the man had left any assets behind which might belong to that heir instead of the new owner of the First Shot Cantina. Or worse...debts the new heir would owe to Hera. Not a fate he'd wish on his worst enemy

Which was why he was still here, ruining his eyes trying to work out if he was looking at a receipt or a recipe for some sort of cocktail. Maybe he should ask the barman. The man did have a pair of rather prominent wings, which Tumnus thought were particularly impractical in the confined space behind the bar, where one wrong move could send a month's worth of stock smashing to the floor, but he had yet to hear the sound of breaking glass, so maybe the man was more careful than Tumnus gave him credit for.

What did he care? Staffing in this place wasn't his problem any more. Falcon Han had chosen to run the place on his own, to cut down on costs and bring in more profit for himself and for Hera. The new owner had already engaged a bartender and a cook, and he'd advertised for more staff.

Which might not be a bad thing. Han had made him handle the contracts at all the Intergalactic Dating Agency events, which had been torture of the worst kind. Watching all those pretty young girls willingly match themselves with a bunch of sex-starved Titans. Horny beasts none of them would even look twice at, if the girls weren't well paid for their services.

While he watched and didn't dare consider forming a relationship with anyone. Not until he'd paid off his brother's debts, which would probably take him the rest of his life, at this rate.

Hello, Horns, who are you?

Tumnus stilled. He didn't know that voice, and no one called him that. He rose slowly, unfolding to his full height. He might be a faun, but he could intimidate better than any billy goat alive. It was all about the horns.

Only to find he was of a similar height to the man behind him. A Human, no less.

The man grinned, not the slightest bit fazed by Tumnus. I'm Hercules. He held out his hand.

Of course he was. Though Tumnus would never have guessed that Hera's stepson would be Human.

Hesitantly, Tumnus shook Hercules' hand. Vertumnus, your bookkeeper, he said.

Mine, not Hera's? Hercules asked.

Tumnus sighed. Of course this was a test of loyalty. With Hera, it always was.

I was the bookkeeper for the previous owner. He died rather suddenly, and I've been trying to make sense of his records so that I could hand them over to you. Hera's orders. If you'd like to keep me on after I've finished with this mess, that's up to you. In the Colony, I do the bookkeeping for a number of businesses, so if you don't want to work with me, I'm sure there's plenty of work to keep me busy. Hera has many diverse interests, after all.

Hercules just nodded, the smile never leaving his face. Put together a quote for your services with the rest of your report. I wouldn't mind having a good numbers man to check the financials, especially for my first year or two. I'd love to see what the first year's profit has been, and whether you think we can improve on that.

Definitely not related to Hera. He seemed so open and honest – the opposite to anything she usually did. And yet...

And what if the numbers don't add up? Tumnus asked, knowing that was likely.

Hercules shrugged. Well, a business doing badly can only get better, so that might not be a bad thing for us. I'd like to know what I'm starting with, before I get too ambitious. I mean, I have a bit of money I can invest if the business needs it, but not so much that I want to go broke. Stars know I don't want to go asking my stepmother for money.

Tumnus shuddered. No, you definitely don't want to owe Hera money. If only his brother Comus had realised that before he'd started borrowing. Or gambling more than he could afford to lose. Or getting himself killed, and leaving Tumnus to foot the bill, working for Hera indefinitely until Comus's debts were paid. I'll get this to you as soon as I can, he promised.

TWO

Flora peered through the blinds at the