So You Wanna Be a Smut Writer, Eh?

By BD Hampton

Have you ever watched a really good porno and thought, hey I can do that! Maybe you have, maybe you haven't. Smut is basically a porno in written form. It's nowhere near erotica, and about as far from romance as one can get. Smut is in its essence is used to get people horny and ready to rock on that special night. Many believe that smut isn't really a genre, but I'm here to tell you that it definitely is.

I move upwards of thirty thousand page reads a month, sometimes more, sometimes less. And it is possible with enough books in your catalog and your ability to paint a porn scene without anyone watching a video. Your pen is the video. Smut doesn't have much in the way of plot or twists and turns like other books you may have read. It's the filthy nitty gritty.

Smut is a necessary genre for those who need a quick one off to go to bed or after the reader reads a HEA romance where the main characters kissed and that's it, and they wanted a little more spice. Smut at its core is pure unadulterated XXX fun! You are the writer, director, producer, and actor all rolled into one.

I decided to write this because I have written over forty novellas and thought I would try to lend a helping hand to anyone who has ever thought of writing it or wants some advice on what subgenres are hot and what is not at this current time. I hope you pick it up...I mean what do you have to lose? At least it can hopefully help you write a better sex scene.

• Language: English
• Publisher: BD Hampton
• Release date: Aug 8, 2023
• ISBN: 9798215571187

BD Hampton

BD Hampton writes some of the most prolific dirty talk play by play books you have ever read. He read 50 Shades and said..."This cant be the best stuff out there, can it?" And he was right.After reading some master pen-smiths he found on Twitter, which you can follow @bdhamptons, he learned about a whole new side of the art. Fifty Shades really is garbage, and the folks who write it today, really make his dick rock hard.He has published his latest "I Worship Cock", a taboo priest and nun BDSM novella to quench the thirst of some folks who really love the religious taboo.It's full of nun and priests getting it on in different stories. If this is your kink....welcome home!!!

Book preview

Preface

So, you want to be a smut writer, eh? The cover caught ya, didn’t it? Good...lesson learned. Sex sells! And it stopped you from scrolling through the other books on a similar topic...hopefully. Although, I’m not sure how many how to smut books are out there. Nonetheless, stopping you from scrolling past is a very important step in smut. The full red lips and nails in black and white with a pen between them. Easy right? Just think about what you would want to see. The covers will make them stop if it’s unique.

Let me first start by saying I am no expert at writing grammar, punctuation, and other technical aspects of the craft, no, not at all, not in the slightest. I’m not Stephen King or Chuck Wendig, both of whom have written excellent how to books. 

And let me just point out before we kick off...smut IS NOT erotica or romance. Nay, nay...not at all...those are more plot base driven with over fifty thousand words in the book, whereas smut gets to the nitty gritty of fucking as a plot line and all that goes with it. Basically, one long sex scene of about fifteen thousand words with the proverbial happy ending.

To be honest, I am just a guy who found a market that most, if not all writers tend to avoid. Smut is not for the weak of heart, hell, I don’t know anyone who starts off wanting to write smut...I think ya just kinda fall into it...well, I did. And if that was your original plan then my hat goes off to you, you’re way ahead of the curve with the drive to produce fantastic work! It’s not a bad thing or something to be ashamed of when you write smut...trust me.

I make a very healthy living as an independent smut writer with a catalog that grows monthly. But some writers look down on smut and erotica writers, usually fantasy writers because they believe it not to be literature. Let me rephrase that, those who are pure fantasy writers, purist as I call them who aren’t hybrid with multiple genre revenues like some of us, myself included in the hybrid list.

They're the same type of people who watch cuck porn and don’t say anything about themselves but condemn it to the masses who like to read it. Just my two cents and I’m just speaking an opinion, definitely not a fact. But if you’re here, you are probably a smut writer looking for a few tricks or are interested in the craft, and you better believe this is a harder craft than most. You have to keep people reading knowing that there is little to no plot twist or character development. You have a limited time to keep the reader engaged or they go somewhere else. We don’t have five hundred pages to end up tossing a ring in a volcano!

By trade though, I’m a fantasy and crime writer as those are my preferred genres. But in the fantasy genre, there are over a million independent writers worldwide all chasing the almighty Lord Of The Rings dollas together, and stepping on each other’s back to get to the proverbial top as it were. 

It’s just not worth the hundred plus thousand words to me that will be lost in the shuffle when I can crank out ten smut novellas faster and easier that are guaranteed to be read with solid sexy covers. There isn’t much plot to my work if you’ve read it, and if not, that’s cool too. I’m just glad you found this. And if you want to read some by all means do, there’s plenty of it. I will be using some examples of my work in the following chapters to help you better understand what I’m talking about. My books are there to get ya off quickly so you can get through another day a little more relaxed and happier than when it started! That’s the essence of smut!

Unlike what we write, in fantasy, you fall into slush piles with overworked and underpaid agents trying to find that one gem out of a million pieces of coal, and in their opinion their coal is your diamond. You can also fall into huge pits of despair and depression that never seem to end as you try to be the next big name as you lay undiscovered. But not in smut. We are our own brand with no agents or anything else!

Hell, if you don’t want your book ever to be read, choose fantasy. Then toss it on Amazon without a good $500 bucks a month to promote it and outshine your fellow writers or whatever you want to call yourself, and you’ll disappear faster than a nut down a hooker's throat. I won’t fault ya, I’ve been there and done that scene, and not as BD Hampton.

So, what qualifies me to write a book on smut you may be asking yourself? Whelp, I have written over eight hundred thousand words across my pen names with the majority of them being in the smut genre. I’m not saying that to pop my collar. I’m saying it because I’ve fucked up enough to know the difference between what actually sells for me versus what doesn’t, and how to continue the growth in my catalog with different stories in different subgenres. 

There is no guarantee that this book I’m writing right now will ever be read (I’m sure the cover helped), but I’m writing it to see if I can help one person with my experience, and make it just a tad bit easier. And if that’s you, then it was well worth my time.

Take what ya want and leave the rest. If you’re looking for something that teaches you how to write, this ain’t it, not even close like I said before. I suggest Chuck Wendig’s 1001 Ways To Be A Kickass Writer. It was fucking phenomenal. It was hilarious and I probably learned more in those few hundred pages than I ever would have learned in a college class on writing! There are a lot of coked out wolverines. Trust me, ya want to read that!

If you’re looking for the secret to thirty plus thousand Kindle Unlimited pages a month, I’ve done it consistently, but I won’t say that can happen for everybody, especially if you write in saturated subgenres like black man white woman (BMWW).

That particular subgenre is sunk in an oozy swamp of nothing gained from penning it with a million other ones out there flooding the market. And if you don’t have a cover that draws interest, it will definitely be lost in the shuffle. I also know that from experience as well.

But in the smut genre, those thousands of Kindle Unlimited pages are possible with enough published books in a catalog in the right subgenres (BWWM, AMBW, step whatever you want, MILF’s/GILF’s, horse cocks and hookers, hell whatever is nasty and well written sells in this genre). 

As of writing this advice (or lack thereof), I have forty or so smut books out with several series and stand alones with the potential to build on if I want. I always leave myself an out to a second book almost every time in case it skyrockets with page reads and the readers want more.

So, if this introduction leaves you wanting more, then follow me through probably the worst writing advice ever given in the history of literature! And if not and ya stop here, I wish ya the best and all the success you deserve in all your writing endeavors. Just a heads up for those who continue, some chapters are short, others a bit longer. I made it that way for the ideas to flow better. Now buckle up cause it’s about to get fucking bumpy...