Look In My Briefs!

By Stan Morris

This is the second volume of my short stories and other material.  The stories contain elements of romance, science fiction, and fantasy, and the book includes some of my poetry. Especially notable are the short stories that comprise the novella "Birthdays." Some material is from "Surviving the Fog" and "Tales of the Ragoon."

• Language: English
• Publisher: Stan Morris
• Release date: Aug 31, 2015
• ISBN: 9798223752424

Stan Morris

Stan Morris was born during the Truman Adminstration in Linwood, California.  He lived in South Gate, Lakewood, and Norwalk before his family moved to Concord, California in 1964.  He was educated at a variety of community colleges before receiving a degree from Eastern New Mexico University.  He has a wonderful wife, two grown gainfully employed children, and a thirst for reading, writing, watching sports, gardening, and international travel.

Book preview

Look in My Briefs!

By Stan Morris

Copyright 2015

Author’s Note: Thank you for downloading this book.  I’ve included short fiction stories, some non-fiction pieces, an excerpt from another book, and a few poems.

Table of Contents

Pall’s Poem

Jara Mackenzie in Court

Unwanted Memory

At the Social Media Public Well

Clothing Annie

Earthworms

Birther

Why I love America

Crossword Puzzle Self-Challenge.

Death Raid

Breakfast

Beware of Story Corruption

The Gubmuhhab Spirits of Christmas

Missing Robin

In My Bed

America’s  Road 1968-2019

Loving Shadow

Blind Date

The American Experience University

The Traveling Roman

Santa, Baby

Haikus

Tales of the Ragoon

Resignation at the White House

The President’s Custodian

Jane Laurence, Property of the Ragoon

The Ten Dollar Girl

Rehabilitation and Punishment

Sir Bill and Queen Doyla

Harold Hardpod, Stranded in Space

O, Come Yee

Making Our Destiny

Birthdays

Tenth Birthday

Eleventh Birthday

Twelfth Birthday

Thirteenth Birthday

Fourteenth Birthday

Fifteenth Birthday

Sixteenth Birthday

Seventeenth Birthday

Eighteenth Birthday

Nineteenth Birthday

Twentieth Birthday

Twenty-First Birthday

Twenty-Second Birthday

The Witch

Rocking Chair

Killing the Deer

The End

Pall’s Poem

I don’t pretend to know a lot,

about the world in which you slide.

It’s hard to speak to people, you know

I’d rather go spacing and hide.

But I see it makes you happy,

to hang out with a group.

And I know you never mind,

when the group becomes a troop.

So, I stay by your side and wait to see

if your eyes will turn to me.

Jara Mackenzie in Court

Author’s Note:  Jara Mackenzie is one of three sisters whose stories are set in the Mackenzie’s Rock universe.  None are finished.  Sarah’s Spaceship Adventure, a book set in that world, but farther in Jara’s future, has been published.

Given what we know about the loose morals of Hooper girls−

Jara Mackenzie and her lawyer, Karen Mayshield, rose as one.

Objection! her lawyer cried.

He did it again! Jara exclaimed.

Justice Calmroab banged her gavel. There will be peace in the court, she yelled.

Mayshield sat down, but Jara remained standing.

Mackenzie, Calmroab warned.

Her identity hasn’t been established, Your Justice, Attorney Pomptous, the lawyer for the bank noted.

Why is he allowed to slander me, and I can’t reply? Jara asked. Can’t you ask a doctor to examine me?  That’s about the tenth time he’s suggested I bounce.  I haven’t ever been bounced. 

The banker snorted and loudly muttered, A likely story.

Why you−

Mackenzie, the Justice warned again, and then she said to the Pomptous, But the young lady has brought up a good point.  You have been featured prominently on the Common Entertainment System in recent days, mostly on news and gossip shows.  In each instance, you’ve brought up the sexual morality of women living in the Hoop.  Isn’t that true?

I was asked questions about that subject, Your Justice, that’s correct.  It’s understandable that parents would want to know the facts concerning Hooper girls, so they can take steps to shield their children from undesirables.

Murmurs from the gallery, supportive and derisive, followed his words.

And during your appearances on the CES, and considering your words in this courtroom, you have suggested that this girl is not a virgin.  Isn’t that correct?

Glancing at the reporters in the courtroom, Lawyer Pomptous pasted on a condescending smile and replied, I am simply commenting on the well-known reputation of Hooper girls, Your Justice.  I’m not saying this person is like all the rest.

There was a light titter of laughter from the crowd.  The Justice banged her gavel down again, and then took a moment in the silence to thoughtfully regard the lawyer.  When she spoke, it was to the official from the Children’s Protective Institute.

Do you have a medical degree, Dr. Careford?

Dr. Doris Careford stood.  Yes, Your Justice.  I am a fully licensed medical practitioner.

Pomptous gave the Justice a puzzled perusal, and then his expression turned to alarm.  He started to rise.

Sit, Calmroab snarled.  The lawyer dropped to his chair.

Dr. Careford, perhaps you can clear up this question of whether the young lady has had sexual intercourse.

I... I don’t have my instruments with me, Careford stammered.

What does it take besides two fingers and a good eyeball? the Justice asked in her mild tone.  Low laughter was heard from the watching crowd.  The news photographers began checking their equipment.

I suppose I could give her an examination.  I’ll set up an appointment.

Oh, I think you can do it right now, the Justice replied. This court will recess for... what... ten minutes?

Murmuring broke out across the gallery.  New flashes were hastily inserted into photographers’ cameras.  Sweat appeared on Pomptous’ brow, and he stood.

Your Justice, I object.  This is most irregular.

Objection denied.  This has nothing to do with the young ladies identity.  This is strictly for the court’s information as to the future disposition of the individual.

The lawyer sat down and began whispering to Potter, the banker.  Justice Calmroab spoke.

The court orders the girl claiming to be Jara Mackenzie to accompany Dr. Doris Careford to my private chamber, for the purpose of an examination, to determine whether or not the girl has engaged in sexual intercourse.  No one else will accompany them.  Do you understand?

The Justice waited until Jara and Careford answered, Yes, then she stood and gestured for them to follow her.  She opened a door, waited until they passed through, closed the door, and returned to her plushy padded seat.  There was some quiet murmuring from the audience as the minutes ticked away.  Then the door opened, Jara and Careford entered the courtroom, and took their seats.  Every photographer in the room edged forward.

Dr. Careford, the Justice said, please tell the court, in your medical opinion, has the individual claiming to be Jara Mackenzie engaged in sexual intercourse?

Your Justice, the girl’s hymen is fully intact, and there is no sign of scarring.  She has never had vaginal sexual intercourse.

Flashes exploded from the cameras.  News aides scurried from the room to report the latest development. The murmuring grew louder, and then clapping erupted, and people began standing as they clapped.  Many glowered at the banker and his lawyer.

Peace, peace! Justice Calmroab banged her gavel again and again. There will be peace in the court.  When order had finally been restored, Calmroab addressed Lawyer Pomptous.  I trust that you accept Dr. Careford’s opinion, since it was you who asked her to intervene in this matter.

The squirming lawyer replied, We might want a second opinion.

Laughter and scornful comments spewed from the gallery, and the Justice had to bang her gavel again.

Let me make this clear, she stated in an icy tone. The court accepts Dr. Careford’s opinion, and any indication from you that this girl is anything other than pure, including comments to the media, will be regarded as an attempt to suborn the court.  Is that clear?

Yes, Your Justice, replied the subdued lawyer.

Very well.  We will now move to the question of whether this individual is indeed, Jara Mackenzie, the co-owner of the assets in question, held in trust by Countrybanc.  Attorney Mayshield, are you ready to present?

Jara’s lawyer stood.  Yes, Your Justice.

Proceed.

Jara Mackenzie, take the Truthseat.

As Jara stood, Pomptous jumped up and said, Objection.  The identity of this individual has not been established.

She can call herself anything she wishes, Mayshield replied. Whether or not she is the Jara Mackenzie in question will be established.

Objection denied, Calmroab ruled. Proceed.

When Jara was seated, Mayshield said, Jara, tell us what happened to you.  How did you come to leave the Hoop asteroid belt and travel to the planet Marl?

Jara took a deep breath.  Her brother, Davud, was safely hidden aboard the Lugging Nut spaceship.  She had to remember not to say anything that might lead these people to suspect his existence.

It was just me, and my sisters, Wendra and Julee, who were living on our asteroid.  We call it Mackenzie’s Rock.  That’s what my father named it.  He’s dead.  My sister took our spaceship to First Rock, hauling a load of ore.  I don’t know what happened to her.  After she left, a spaceship landed on our rock, and they took Julee.  They took almost all our supplies, too.  I was close to starving when I was rescued by Captain Byuspli Tyre and his brother, Racer.  They took me aboard their ship, the Lugging Nut.

When Captain Tyre and Racer took you aboard the Lugging Nut, did you protest?

No, I was unconscious.  They put me in their medidoc.  I woke up after a week.

There was a light murmur from the watching crowd.

How long did it take the Lugging Nut to reach Marl?

About three months.

So, for three months you lived on the Lugging Nut.  Did Captain Tyre charge you for food and air?

No. I asked him to give me a bill, but he refused.  He said I was family, because I united with Racer.

Is the Hooper word ‘united’ the same as the Marlen word ‘married’?

Yes.

There was another murmur from the crowd, low but louder.

When you landed on Marl, did you have any money?

No.  Captain Tyre loaned me some.

Do you have an account with a bank?

Yes. Countrybanc.

Objection, Your Justice.  That has yet to be determined.

Agreed, Calmroab said.

Jara, do you believe you have an account with Countrybanc?

Yes.  My father opened it, and added me and my sisters to the account.

Did you contact Countrybanc after you landed?

I went there in person.  Racer went with me.

Did you ask to see a representative?

Yes.

Is that representative here today?

Yes, it was that man.  Jara pointed to Potter.

Did he give you his name?

He introduced himself as Pincher Potter.

Did you tell him who you were, and what had happened to you?

Yes.

What did he say?

He said, ‘I see, and then he said he had to do something, and he left the room."

How long was he gone?

About twenty minutes.

"What did he say when he returned?

He said there was a problem with the account, and that I should come back in a day or two.

What did you say?

I said I would come back.

Did you leave?

Yes.

What happened then?

Racer said he was worried about Potter.  He didn’t trust him.  When we got down to the first floor, there were two big men waiting at the front door.  I didn’t see them, but Racer pointed them out.  We went back to the elevators, and he checked the list of offices in the building.  There was a law office listed on the tenth floor, so we took the elevator to the tenth and went to that office.

Mayshield turned to Calmroab.

Your Justice, if I may, I would like to give testimony next.

Very well.  Mackenzie, sit down.  Mayshield take the Truthseat.

When she was seated, Mayshield spoke directly to Calmroab.

I sublease a small office from a larger law firm.  It’s a single room on the tenth floor of the Countrybanc Building.  I was working in my office when the door opened, and two young persons entered.  It was Jara and Racer.  Racer told me that they might be in some trouble.  I questioned them, until I became aware of her history and the situation, and then I called your dictator and asked for a screening.  As I was speaking to dictator Cleverton, the door opened, and two men entered.  I demanded to know who they were, but they refused to answer, and they ordered Jara and Racer to accompany them.  I pointed to the screen and notified them that we were being recorded.  They became nervous and left.  I took Jara and Racer to my apartment.  They spent the night, but in the morning I was contacted by Dr. Doris Careford who informed me that I might be in violation of Child Protection laws.  I explained what I had seen, and after visiting my apartment and questioning them, she agreed to leave Racer and Jara in my custody until this hearing.  That is the end of my testimony.

Thank you, Calmroad said. Lawyer Pomptous, do you wish to question?

One or two, Your Justice.  Mayshield, did either of those men tell you that they worked for Countrybanc?

No.

Did they indicate that they were in the employ of anyone at Countrybanc.

No.

Thank you, Mayshield.  Thank you, Your Justice.

Mayshield, do you have another witness? Calmroab asked.

I wish to question Dr. Doris Careford.

Your Justice, I object, Pomptous complained. This is a fishing expedition.

Justice Calmroab’s eyebrows rose.  I was not aware you are representing Dr. Careford.

He’s not, Careford said, glaring at Pomptous.  I have no objection to testifying.

Objection denied.

When Dr. Careford was seated, Mayshield asked, How did you come to be involved in this incident?

Objection, Your Justice, said Pomptous. That may be confidential information.

Dr. Careford, does what you are about to say come under the heading of confidentiality? Calmroab asked.

No, it does not.  This kind of request is uploaded and saved to the graph and becomes a part of the public record.

Very well, answer the question.

Your Justice, my involvement began when I received a call from Pincher Potter.  He said he wished to file a complaint against Attorney Karen Mayshield.  He claimed that she was harboring a fugitive child.

"A fugitive child?"

That is how he phrased it, Your Justice.

Dr. Careford, said Mayshield, did you contact me after hearing from Pincher Potter?

You know I did.

And did you visit me at my apartment?

Yes.

And did you examine the girl and boy?

I observed them visually, but I did not give them a thorough examination.

Did they appear to be healthy?

They did.

Did they give you their names?

She introduced them as Jara Mackenzie and Racer Tyre.

Did she tell you her story?

She did.  It was a remarkable tale.

Did you believe her?

I neither believed nor disbelieved her.

Did you make any effort to verify her identity?

Yes.  I called Pincher Potter and asked him to send me the Countrybanc DNA record for Jara Mackenzie.

What did Potter say?

He said he wasn’t sure the bank had her DNA records, but that even if they did, they were confidential bank information.  I warned him I would ask for a warrant.  He told me to go ahead and do so.

Have you asked for a warrant?

Yes.

Has the bank responded?

Yes, they lodged an objection.  The request will have to work its way through the courts.

Pomptous stirred restlessly, but did not interrupt.

Did Racer provide you with a DNA sample?

He did.

Did you find a match?

Yes.  There are samples of his DNA on file with a bank and with several major ore refining companies.

Is he who he says he is?

Yes, beyond a doubt.

Does the Child Protective Institute have any further business with Racer Tyre?

No.  The Hoop-Marl Treaty, signed at First Rock, requires our department to recognize as a legal adult, anyone recognized as a legal adult by a Hoop government.  He is listed as a legal adult by many Hoop governments; therefore he is an adult under our law.  We have no interest in adults.

Thank you.  That is all.

Thank you, Dr. Careford, for your testimony, said Calmroab.  Any other witnesses, Mayshield?

I wish to question Pincher Potter.

Objection, Your Justice, exclaimed Pomptous. Pincher Potter is not on trial here.

This is not a trial.  This is a hearing.  Did you not study anything as to the procedures of Children’s Court?

My staff wrote a briefing paper.  I perused it last night.

I see.  You might be surprised at how much leeway I have under the Children’s Legal Code.  Pincher Potter, take the Truthseat.

I request a recess, so I can appeal to a higher court, Pomptous said.

No.

No?  What do you mean, no?  You have to give me time to appeal.

No, I don’t.  Procedures in Children’s Court are different than procedures in criminal or civil court. That’s one of the things you would have learned, had you taken the time to familiarize yourself with the procedures of Children’s Court.  Pincher Potter, take the Truthseat.

Potter was visible sweating by the time he sat down.

Pincher Potter is your name? Mayshield asked.

Yes.

You are an investment management officer for Countrybanc?

I am.

Do you recognize the girl and boy sitting at my table?

I suppose they look familiar.

Did they meet with you in your office?

That might have been them.

Did she introduce herself as Jara Mackenzie?

Uh... yes.

Did she ask you to disburse money to her from the Mackenzie Rock account?

"I think... she