Toddlers Gone Wild

By Nina Jacobs

Toddlers are stressful, so I wanted to share some of my son's hilarious mishaps and mischievous adventures. These 15 short stories are meant to remind us to find the humor in the stressful parts of toddlerhood. It flies by so fast (even though it can seem like forever!) and we need to enjoy these times. In this book you find my toddler in shitty situations (pun intended!) from potty training to meeting his new baby sister.

He certainly makes me laugh. Maybe he'll do the same for you! Enjoy!

• Language: English
• Publisher: Nina Jacobs
• Release date: Aug 2, 2023
• ISBN: 9798223049654

Book preview

Dedicated to my Son,

Jaxson, for being one of the

funniest toddler I know.

Special thanks to

Jenn Jones, for helping me

Table of Contents

Ladies’ Man

Laxative Delight

Bathtime Follies

Halloween Fears

Potatoes and Chips

Ride’em Cowboy

Bathtub Poop

Fireworks

Poop on the Arm

Mosquito Hawk

Emma’s Milk

Birthday Candles

Jaxson and the Fireman

Wee and NO

Water Wars

*BONUS* Monsters in the Tunnel

Prologue

Before having kids, I didn’t truly understand how toddlers could be so wild...but I get it now! The rollercoaster of emotions means temper tantrums one minute, and doing something cute and hilarious the next. The things he does just baffle me and sometimes I can't help but laugh, if only to keep me from crying.

If you have toddlers, I’m sure you have some wild stories to tell as well. I’m still at the beginning of the toddler phase and man, I can’t wait to see what new things he does (especially when his sister is old enough to join him!).

I hope you enjoy these stories inspired by my son.

Ladies’ Man

I know I’m cute. You don’t have to tell me, although older women have been telling me that since I arrived on the scene. First they take in a long, slow gasp, and then say, Ohhhhhhh my Goddddddd! He is soooooo cuuuuuuute!

Yeah. I know. I can’t help it. It’s just my cross to bear.

One weekend, we were going to a wedding, something I’d never been to and I had no clue what to expect. Mommy and Daddy got all fancy, and Daddy changed me out of my comfy clothes (which I wasn’t wild about) and into the finest threads on the planet. I mean, I was slick. I was happening. Those ladies weren’t going to know what hit them. I tried to reach Daddy’s cologne but I couldn’t reach it so I was just going to have to ride on my good looks alone.

The wedding itself was long and boring. More people in fancy clothes and flowers everywhere. I even saw a person or two crying, which I didn’t understand at all. Were they hurt? Did they not like the clothes they were wearing?

But after the wedding, it was time to shine. Music started playing, the lights dimmed