All Over Again

By Marilyn Lee

Hearts on Fire—All Over Again

 

I never thought I'd see J.T. again. The college sweetheart who stole my heart and shattered it into a million pieces when he left me for another woman after taking everything from me—including my virginity. I thought I had put the past behind me. But when he walked back into my life, all those old feelings rushed back, overwhelming me. One kiss from him and our passion burned hotter than ever, reigniting a flame I thought long extinguished. And I had to have him back in my bed again.

 

And yet, a secret separated us, a truth that pressed down on my chest, threatening to suffocate the fragile hope that J.T. and I could have a second chance at love. Every time I looked into his eyes, I felt torn between revealing the truth and risking everything or keeping it hidden and letting our past destroy our future when I could no longer conceal it. And knew I had to make a painful choice—one that might drive him away again. For good this time.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Marilyn Lee Unleashed
• Release date: Jul 27, 2023
• ISBN: 9798223113690

Marilyn Lee

Marilyn Lee lives, works, and writes on the East Coast. In addition to thoroughly enjoying writing erotic romances, she enjoys roller-skating, spending time with her large, extended family, and rooting for all her hometown sports teams. Her other interests include collecting Doc Savage pulp novels from the thirties and forties and collecting Marvel comics from the seventies and eighties (particularly Thor and The Avengers). Her favorite TV shows are forensic shows, westerns (Gunsmoke and Have Gun, Will Travel are particular favorites), mysteries (loves the old Charlie Chan mysteries. Her all-time favorite mystery movie is probably Dead, Again), and nearly every vampire movie or television show ever made (Forever Knight and Count Yorga, Vampire are favorites). Marilyn has won numerous writing accolades, including a CAPA award for Bloodlust: Conquering Mikhel Dumont and the following Lub-Dubs Awards for 2009: Lifetime Achievement Award, In Blood And Worth Loving (Best erotic novel and best sci-fi/fantasy/paranormal Award. She loves to hear from readers who can email her at [e-mail] or who can visit her website, http://www.marilynlee.org. Visit her Facebook page (https://www.facebook.com/marilyn.lee.393950?ref=tn_tnmn) She has a Yahoo! Group called Love Bytes that readers can join by sending an email to [e-mail]

Book preview

Chapter One

Samara

They say you never forget your first love, but I never fully believed in that sentiment. That is until I found myself irresistibly drawn back to J.T. Alexander, who had once shattered my heart into a million pieces.

After our devastating split, I thought I had moved on with my life. I met and fell in love with Ben. He and I embarked on a beautiful journey together. For sixteen blissful years, Ben and I built a life filled with love, laughter, and the joys of raising two children and adopting another. Our marriage eventually ended despite our passion, but we remained close friends.

However, fate has a funny way of bringing two people back together. After our divorce, I decided to live a celibate life while Ben took a different path and explored various romantic relationships before remarrying and quickly divorcing. Once he was single again, we became lovers, much to the joy of our kids.

As we rediscovered the passion we had once shared, I realized that the physical part of our relationship was as satisfying as it had always been. Maybe even more so. Which I thought might be why Ben’s second marriage failed so quickly. When the idea of our getting married again, Ben suggested I have a few flings to enjoy my newfound freedom. I was confident that I had everything I needed in a partner in him and saw no need for such an experience.

However, life had other plans for me. Tragically, my beloved dogs, my companions for fifteen years, passed away. I felt lonely and restless with the kids living away from home.

Ben and the kids recognized my need to grieve and heal. Despite my protests, they organized a month-long escape to Florida at a luxurious hotel. Ben drove me to the airport and requested I allow myself the freedom to indulge in romantic adventures.

I was hesitant at first but soon found solace in the warm sun and the beauty of the ocean. As I explored the vibrant culture, I felt reinvigorated. Soon I found myself ready to embrace my future as Ben’s wife again.

But first, I decided to use the rest of my month-long stay to do whatever I wanted, including finding a few one-night stands to help me move on. After all, a modern, forty-two-year-old woman should have had intimate experiences with more than two men.

So, on the third day, I went to the spa and the salon. Later I  dressed in a classic black sequined dress that Ben had once said always aroused him. With three-inch heels to show off my long legs, the dress hugged my curves and ended just above my knees, drawing attention to my backside, which Ben had praised as the bomb.

Feeling confident and sexy, I left my room with seduction on my mind. As I exited the elevator, I saw a tall, handsome man with dark hair and warm brown eyes that used to light up with a smile every time he looked at me. I hadn’t seen that smile in a while, a smile that had once shattered my heart.

One look at J.T. Alexander and the pain and hurt of long ago came flooding to the surface, threatening to overwhelm me. I remembered how desperately I had begged for the chance to be his mistress and the humiliation that ensued when he rejected me. I wanted to turn around and retreat into the elevator to avoid facing him.

But then I told myself there was no need for shame. I had been much thinner and had longer hair when he left me. Now, I was full-figured, and the hair he’d loved running his fingers through as we kissed, I wore much shorter. But I remembered those kisses. Looking at him, I could almost taste them again.

Excuse me, I said calmly, certain he would not even recognize me. He took an involuntary step back. And I walked past him, saddened by the realization that he didn’t remember me. But this newfound strength enabled me to move forward with a sense of dignity.

At least, I hoped I was outwardly calm. My heart raced inwardly, and I felt almost sick with despair at the discomfort of seeing him so unexpectedly caused. Resisting the urge to look behind me, I hurried down the hall. Once I turned the corner, I slumped against the wall while I struggled to bring my breathing back to normal.

Sam? I heard his voice and sucked in a breath before turning to face him. There he stood, a vision of masculine perfection, his once slender frame filled out in all the right places. I couldn’t help but imagine the muscles hidden beneath his clothes and the strength in his arms.

In seconds, I felt like I was suspended in time, caught in the moment of recognition, unsure of how to proceed. I was ready to pretend I didn’t know him, but he spoke again before I could.

Oh, damn, Sami, he continued, his warm, sensual smile igniting a flame deep within me and reminding me of what we had once shared.

My heart fluttered. I didn’t think you’d recognize me, J.T., I admitted.

He frowned. Why wouldn’t I recognize you?

I shrugged, a hint of self-consciousness bubbling up within me. There’s more of me to recognize these days.

The years have been extremely kind to you. You look incredible.

And there was the charm that had once swept me off my feet, now threatening to do so all over again. I shook my head, trying to dispel the spell he was casting. Excessive weight doesn’t look good on anyone, I replied.

Beauty, like excess, is in the eye of the beholder, he said, his dark gaze roaming over my curves before settling back on my eyes. And from where I’m standing, you look absolutely stunning. There’s just no damn denying that.

Maybe you’re standing in the wrong spot, I said, telling myself I could not afford to be charmed by him again.

My opinion won’t change—no matter where I stand. Besides, I have twenty-twenty vision. He shrugged. And I’ve also gained weight.

It’s hardly the same thing.

No? His dark gaze swept over me again, but he nodded. Yes, there is more of you than there used to be. And you know what? It looks damn good on you.

And this from the man who had dumped me for a bone-thin, silicone-injected blond. Nevertheless, he was still a charmer.

Damn, Sami. It’s so good to see you again. He extended his hand.

I reluctantly did the same.

As soon as his fingers interlaced with mine, a surge of emotions flooded my senses, leaving me reeling with a longing I thought I’d buried long ago. At that moment, I was powerless to resist him.

I made no effort to object when his arms encased me in a warm embrace, his lips trailing kisses along my neck, sending shivers down my spine. And then, before I could even think to protest, his mouth claimed mine in a passionate and insistent kiss, like a blaze igniting a dormant flame deep within me.

The years melted away with each brush of his lips, returning me to when we were young, wild, and recklessly in love. But as much as I wanted to surrender to the feelings he evoked, I couldn’t forget the heartache he’d caused me.

Still, I couldn’t deny the intoxicating pleasure that flowed through me as his mouth explored mine, urging me to forget everything except the blissful sensations coursing through my veins. I gave myself over to him, but only for a moment. I couldn’t let myself be fooled by his charm again.

Despite my desperate efforts to pull away, he lingered, kissing me with a passion that threatened to consume us. His lips were fiery, leaving a trail of desire in their wake as he moved from my mouth to my neck and ear, inciting an inferno of longing I couldn’t control.

And just like that, I was falling under his spell again, succumbing to his touch’s all-consuming heat, the electrifying pull of his kiss. I was powerless to resist, lost in a whirlwind of emotions that seemed ripped from our past.

But then reality intruded, reminding me why I couldn’t give in to him. With a final effort, I pushed him away, gasping for breath as I gazed up at him. What was that? I whispered, my voice trembling with a mix of anger and desire.

If you have to ask, I guess it was a mistake, he admitted, his dark gaze fixed on mine.

I struggled to regain control of my racing heart, to find the words that would put distance between us once more. Yes, I finally said, my voice barely above a whisper. It was.

Do you want me to apologize?

What would be the point of that? I had felt his kiss right down to my last nerve ending, and no apology would change that. Honestly, I wasn’t sure I wanted an apology. I shook my head.

Good, because I’m not sorry.

Neither was I. I resisted the urge to lick my lips to taste his kisses again.

But it’s been twenty-two long years, and it’s so damn good to see you again. And feel you.

I blinked. Excuse me? What did you say?

It’s been twenty-two long years, and it feels like only yesterday, he murmured, his eyes drinking in my every feature.

I struggled to hold back the emotions that threatened to spill over. Seeing him again brought back sweet and bitter memories I thought I had buried deep in the past. I had to tell him the truth but didn’t know how. The thought of what I would say to our sons or him weighed heavily on my mind.

I have to go, I said, trying to steady my voice.

He reached out, his hand encircling mine. Go? No, you can’t just walk away, Sami.

I looked into his eyes, drowning in the intensity of his gaze. He