Rivertown

By Larry McEvoy

The tragic accidental drowning of Thomas’ younger brother results in the decimation of his family. Thomas’ father, unable to deal with the loss, turns to violence and alcohol, and his mother, as an attempt to extricate herself from the abuse, makes a failed attempt to kill his father, sending her to prison.

Thomas spends the rest of his life attempting to assuage his guilt, as he blames himself for the death of his brother. He seeks peace initially through life in a monastery, subsequently moving to London where he meets Iris, through whom he achieves a partial healing.

The story of Rivertown reflects the meaningful contrast between hardship and prosperity in which the outcome of relative coexistence within such differences may result in an appreciation of natural truth and virtue.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Austin Macauley Publishers
• Release date: Jul 21, 2023
• ISBN: 9781398426283

Larry McEvoy

Larry McEvoy grew up in South Dublin. He subsequently obtained three university degrees at University College Dublin (BA Social Science), University of Surrey (MSC Applied Social Studies), University of London (BA Philosophy). After working in banking, on building sites and with alcoholics, he spent the majority of his career in the Probation Service in London, including two spells working in London prisons. Since retiring he has been writing poetry and stories. He enjoys running. He has two adult children and lives in Buckinghamshire with his wife.

Book preview

The River

Thomas Kelly was generally regarded within the town as a quiet boy who mostly kept his thoughts to himself. He enjoyed an intrinsic fascination with and love of nature, having a particular affinity with the town’s unyielding river.

Several weeks after their aborted attempt to climb Craggy Rock, a high outcrop that overlooked the ocean, the Kelly boys had begun to ponder the prospect of crossing the river on a crudely assembled raft, being constructed of a number of wooden planks they had retrieved from the rushing water, together with an additional two planks from their father’s outhouse which were shorter and narrower. It was intended that these should be used as oars with which to steer the makeshift vessel.

The younger boy, having survived a recent perilous climbing adventure with his brother proved unable to rid the proposed river crossing from his mind. His eagerness was such that Thomas had begun to doubt the wisdom of their plan, knowing that an excess of enthusiasm in such circumstances might jeopardise not only their project but also their lives. Nevertheless, being bolstered by his satisfaction in having, with the assistance of his sibling, constructed an apparently usable raft of sorts he became increasingly determined to attempt the crossing while persuading himself that he and John Junior were capable of achieving their ambition. Being aware that his brother was no more than a moderately competent swimmer Thomas found reassurance in the knowledge of his own greater ability in this regard.

The day finally arrived when the boys approached the riverbank on which they had carefully stowed their raft, out of sight and securely anchored by a length of rope to an adjacent rock.

Very few of Rivertown’s residents knew the exact origin or final exit place of the river though it was generally believed to emerge from an underground source that flowed throughout the seasons, gathering unseen momentum as it descended towards lower ground before eventually spilling forcefully into the sea. The brothers estimated its width at the point of their intended entry to be approximately fifty feet.

As they watched the river, they shared a renewed sense of wonder at its powerful, all-embracing, relentless course towards its final destination. Theirs was a wordless communication born of a mutual desire to refrain from comment while witnessing the immensity of the water’s force as it ploughed and crashed through all objects that would impede its path.

Thomas felt himself being jolted into action as he became aware of the passing time and awaiting river. He knew they must launch the craft without further delay though he had gradually become conscious of his younger brother’s unexpected change of attitude which now seemed to contain an element of doubt.

A curious feature of Thomas’s character, though one of which he was mostly unaware, was his capacity for inner perception. It was a characteristic that represented a natural inclination to search within when that which is external failed to be of service. He found himself reflecting on the contrasting characters of himself and his brother as he pondered the unexpected reluctance of John Junior to proceed with their agreed plan.

The older boy, immersed in thought, slowly approached his sibling who was seated on a boulder as he gazed in seeming disinterest at the raging river. On noticing the approach of his brother, John Junior began staring in an aimless manner at the ground, suggesting a state of troubled uncertainty and growing discontent.

Thomas, being aware of his brother’s comparative immaturity, quickly seized on the emerging dilemma that had begun to progressively become evident: John Junior was experiencing troublesome feelings of indecision as to whether he should declare his wish to proceed with the venture or finally abandon their planned enterprise. The truth, so far as Thomas knew, was that the boy had lost his nerve and was suffering a corresponding feeling of disloyalty towards his older brother.

As John Junior continued to linger, Thomas began to wonder whether this hesitancy was a reflection of simple fear or a developing reluctance to depend on others. In either case, it appeared to represent a premature attempt at self-determination.

Having pondered the prospect of further difficulties in the event that John Junior should revert to his earlier desire to risk the river crossing Thomas retreated to an accommodating boulder on the riverbank, being decided to seriously examine a troubling dilemma which he recognised as leading to the possibility of a disastrous ending.

With characteristic thoughtfulness he weighed the pros and cons of various possible outcomes before finally deciding they should abandon the intended crossing. He was aware of the prospect that his sibling, having apparently arrived at a state of increased confusion, would suffer a further loss of self-esteem in the event of a final withdrawal from their planned adventure.

Thomas, being determined to carry out his carefully considered decision, finally approached John Junior with feelings that had become more painful than the prospect of launching the raft.

As he reluctantly approached his sibling, he became worryingly aware of the boy’s increased uncertainty as to whether they should proceed with their original plan or finally abandon it.

Regardless of the sensitivity with which he was informed of Thomas’s decision to abandon their project the younger boy responded by throwing himself on the grass and sulking for several minutes. His brother waited patiently before caringly outlining the severe risks that would attach to an attempted crossing.

John Junior, being aware of his older brother’s increasing doubts as to their ability to control a makeshift raft across a powerful river, had begun to show signs of uncharacteristic stubbornness, born apparently of confused pride.

Thomas, closely studying the boy, discerned an element of pre-adolescent rebelliousness in his brother whose defiant attitude bore evidence of Thomas’s earlier deliberations as to the likelihood of the boy’s need to disguise an emerging inner insecurity by way of a diversionary show of belligerence.

On experiencing feelings of growing concern for his brother’s predicament Thomas became further troubled by the boy’s increasing distress. With a foolish disregard for his better judgment, he made a sudden decision to risk the river crossing. Eventually persuading himself of the possibility of getting the raft and its passengers to the opposite bank, he belied his true feelings which he suppressed for what he questioningly regarded as the sake of John Junior.

It was a decision he would come to regret for the rest of his natural life though the associated pain was eventually relieved in circumstances which were of a somewhat mystical nature following many years of suffering and concern for others.

As the boys cautiously eased the makeshift raft into the fast-flowing river, it quickly became evident that they were in serious trouble. In less than a minute, John Junior had lost his oar to the water’s surging passage, requiring Thomas to move rapidly from one side of the raft to the other as it rose and fell, rushing from bank to bank, unmindful of the desperation of its passengers. Its timbers had begun to collapse, threatening to spew its planks and human cargo mercilessly to the waiting waters.

Thomas, being desperately engaged in attempting to conserve what was left of their vessel, heard a piercing scream from his brother whom he witnessed being shunted overboard. Within seconds, he had disappeared from sight.

A Painful Homecoming

It was approaching teatime in the Kelly household as Thomas reluctantly trudged towards his home. He had proved able to eventually survive the water’s power as he persistently sought to regain the riverbank. Over a period of several minutes during the course of which he had been dragged beneath the river more than once, he managed to steer his limp body towards the river’s edge, the while using his worn limbs as best he could before reaching the bank and dragging his body on to the grass.

His harrowingly painful homeward return brought back memories of his mother’s account of her childhood loss following the fatal drowning of her youngest brother whose older male sibling later endured considerable misery before succumbing to an early death.

As Thomas wearily dragged his exhausted body towards his home, he bitterly regretted his decision to deny his parents any knowledge of his intention to attempt the river crossing with his sibling.

The tragic event of John Junior’s drowning caused great torment to the boys’ parents, leading to a progressive loss of sanity on the part of their father who gradually developed a violent hatred towards his surviving son and the boy’s mother.

Thomas endured much suffering during subsequent years, his mind being severely traumatised for much of his adolescent and adult life.

It would be many years before he once again encountered the dangers of the river.

A Family Curse

Following the tragic loss of her second child in a drowning incident Ruth Kelly, nee Kinsella, had been unable to cope with a tragedy that was all the more difficult to accept in that it bore a curious resemblance to the childhood death of her brother, Brian, which had left her with an eerie fear of the spirit of St Gregor, a seventeenth-century monk, cousin to a Gaelic chieftain, who was locally believed to jealously guard over ‘Holy Lake’ which was revered by the residents of Rivertown. It was rumoured that the monk was likely to severely punish any man, woman, or child who failed to comply with the wishes of their parents. An ancient shrine of unknown origin had been constructed in the form of a small rectangular stone building. Its weather-beaten, eroded framework was thought to have been in existence for more than a hundred years. Local people had preserved the shrine to the best of their abilities, being careful to maintain the stonework insofar as they could. It had come to symbolise a place of holiness. In the inner chamber of the small structure lay a carved slab of granite stone on which were inscribed some barely distinguishable words, reportedly uttered by the saint in bygone days;

Heed the voice of thy parents if thou wouldst avoid the perils of sin.

Ruth Kelly’s reaction to the death of her brother had remained clearly impressed on her mind, its circumstances being retold time and again as the Kinsella family attempted to come to terms with the event. Her older brother, Kevin who survived the disaster had repeatedly recounted events in a hopeless attempt to somehow come to terms with his constant feeling of culpability, despite having endured life-threatening risks in attempting to rescue his younger sibling.

Kevin was known to have disregarded the warning of his parents as he and his younger brother announced their intention of launching their father’s rowing boat on ‘Holy Lake’ in anticipation of an adventurous afternoon. Their father had advised against their aspiration, citing the prediction of a local fisherman of the likelihood of stormy weather.

As they rowed some distance from the shore Brian, noting the darkening clouds, attempted to persuade his brother to turn the boat around, bearing in mind the wishes of their parents.

Kevin, being reluctant to abandon their adventure, firmly resisted the prospect of an immediate return to the shoreline. He would later come to regret his disregard for the advice of his parents following a horrifying experience in which, despite his courageous attempts, he failed to save the life of his young brother whose tragic death by drowning would leave an indelible wound on the Kinsella family.

Ruth and her remaining sibling, Kevin, being emotionally scarred by the death of their brother, had frequently discussed the incident in such minute detail as to suffer recurrent dreams of a kind that resulted in prolonged periods of depression.

Following the eventual death of Kevin and their parents, Ruth experienced recurring feelings of despondency, having nobody with whom to share her pain.

In time, she regained a measure of acceptance which led to some personal contentment during her subsequent marriage to John Kelly, a military man with whom she produced two sons. Nevertheless, she had remained troubled by feelings of loss, her childhood memories continuing to distress her.

More than a month had passed since the loss of her second child, John Junior, when Ruth Kelly overheard a conversation between her grieving husband and Martin Heaton in the kitchen of their home. It had been shortly after midnight and she had lain awake, wishing to voice an accustomed goodnight to her spouse before surrendering to sleep.

Some of the conversation had penetrated the floor of her bedroom, being remarkable in its sincerity and intensity of feeling. She recognised the voice of the science instructor:

No, John, he had said, it’s more than that, much more. The thing is there’s nothing of importance that can be known. Once you can understand and live with that you will have no fear of life. We must accept the void for what it truthfully is – nothing! If we can really see this, it has great beauty though the part of us that sees is not the one we know.

Though she desperately sought to understand what she had overheard, the memory was to later haunt her in the feeling that it held the key to her husband’s subsequent engulfment in ideas that were too complex or too simple for his understanding. She knew his anger towards their remaining son, whom he had come to blame for the death of the younger child, had become entangled in memories of his recent experiences as a soldier and subsequent mercenary fighter in war-torn Central Africa.

As she drifted into sleep, the muted sound of voices became fainter, being gathered up in frightening dreams of hollowness.

Why, continued the instructor, should we believe in anything? Why think that anything, other than the unknowable ground of our being, is real or has any meaning?

Noting the look of uneasiness on his friend’s face Martin, having briefly felt inclined to reassure, regained his scientific composure and his faith in the unswerving balance with which his mind operated when informed by reason.

This is the heart of it, he said, though it will knock most men off balance in the absence of something to hold on to.

He paused, realising how far the conversation had strayed into territory that must remain unknown to the mind of man and had claimed the sanity of some who took that path. And yet he had a sense, though faint, that it was the very loss of balance that took one to the ground of everything if only one could hold one’s nerve. Any thoughts he might have had of the impact of his ideas on John Kelly were finally eclipsed by a sensibility to that wall of human consciousness that constantly obscures the truth beyond, the egocentric invention that protects mankind in a cultural construction of meaning and certainty.

Martin had increasingly come to believe this wall of consciousness to be no less than the mind of man, a place of turmoil and superstition.

In an abstruse awareness that the wall needs to be abandoned before mankind can perceive what lies beyond Martin had thrown fear together with caution aside in the face of a dawning sense of the magnificence that lay beyond human comprehension in its obsessive demand for certainty.

There is a ground, he continued, that lies beyond our knowing and despoiling because it must, and therein lies its sacredness.

You know, he continued, there is an extraordinary sense of freedom in letting go of everything. It is as though we have died and been reborn.

John Kelly would later become dangerously obsessed with these words of his friend.

As he turned his eyes to the floor, an unaccustomed sense of fear intruded on the order of John Kelly’s mind, the fixed squares of evenly laid linoleum appearing to scatter before his frown. He felt his balance going as he attempted to steady himself by