Strawberry Jelly Donut Creem Betweens: A Full Review

By Mike James Davis

We all know and certainly all love that buy-'em-anywhere cookie, that two cookity crisps sandwiching a lush disc of cream or creme or Creem, that yummy puck that fills your mouth with wholesome wonder! I'm referring to none other than Creem Betweens, the country's best-loved cookie!

First, I suppose I

• Language: English
• Publisher: Planet Bizarro
• Release date: Jul 15, 2023
• ISBN: 9781915546364

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Copyright © 2023 by Mike James Davis

All rights reserved.

This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to persons living or dead, or real events, is purely coincedental.

No portion of this book may be reproduced in any form without written permission from the publisher or author, except as permitted by UK copyright law.

Contents

. Chapter

Title Page

. Chapter

1. 1

2. 2

3. 3

4. 4

5. 5

6. 6

7. 7

8. 8

9. 9

10. 10

11. 11

12. 12

13. 13

14. 14

About the Author

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To cookies, and to my family and friends who eat them. And milk for being there through it all.

Strawberry Jelly Donut Creem Betweens

A Full Review

Mike James Davis

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Planet Bizarro Press

First, I suppose I should give a little background to you, the reader of this review, the one who has happened upon my final manuscript and is actually about to read through the contents, hopefully, in their entirety. I dearly hope these words, my last, will not fade silently into obscurity and the truth in this manuscript be forever lost. That’d be a tragedy. So, here’s hoping.

Strawberry Jelly Donut Creem Betweens: A Full Review

as Reviewed by Mark Creem BetweenMyKnees Dallas

Date:

1

We all know and certainly all love that buy-’em-anywhere cookie, that two cookity crisps sandwiching a lush disc of cream or creme or Creem, that yummy puck that fills your mouth with wholesome wonder. I’m referring to none other than Creem Betweens, the country’s best-loved cookie.

I eat Creem Betweens. I eat many, many Creem Betweens. I always have. Ever since my pre-adolescent gums rumbled as my Creem Betweens teeth grew in and grandpa taught me all the ways to lick that delicious creme between with my still burgeoning tongue dexterity, I’ve eaten at least a couple dozen Creem Betweens a day. I have intimate knowledge of the taste, the texture, the smell, the full experience of nearly every known and yet-to-be known Creem Betweens flavor there is to know and not know yet. So skilled am I at eating Creem Betweens, that in my mid-teens, I was commissioned to write my first review of a Creem Betweens product: Double Creem.

This, in my professional opinion, is the pinnacle Creem Betweens experience. I always enjoy lolling that double dose of creme from cheek to cheek much like a fat school kid's belly does when he belly bumps a new kid as a way of hazing him into joining their band of misfit friends, something that has worked on many of friend I never had a chance to befriend because the fat kids would belly bounce them into submission long before I ever had a chance to even talk to them. My resentment and jealousy drove me to succeed despite my friendless upbringing, but in actuality, I’ve come to realize that my insecurity has propelled my Creem Betweens eating career, or rather hobby, as my first review, the review for Double Creem Creem Betweens was an unpaid commission and my only outright commission. The right proportion of crunchy, classic chocolate wafer was the perfect balance to this creamy childhood resentment.

That review was a hit, and I garnered the nickname Creem Between’m’knees, a nickname that stemmed from my online pseudonym, Creem BetweenMyKnees. The fat kids loved me even if they didn’t pay for the review and the mysterious entity that first commissioned me remains unknown to me to this day no matter how many of these popular fat kid misfit friend band leaders tooter their talkers about my scintillating Creem Betweens orations, orations made writ in a series of manuscripts, not unlike the one you happen upon now, dear reader, savior of my last words, carrier of my last thoughts, the only person to perpetuate the thought that is me further into the timestream and creating a kind of immortality if you stretch the meaning of immortality to include the memory of that person instead of just, ya know, being alive forever. How many years has it been? You can’t possibly tell me, given the fact that I am surely dead or something more by the time you read these very words, but still. It’d be cool to know if I’m still known, or if you reading this makes me known again, immortal once more! In the future, there will be Creem Betweens that can communicate with the past. They’re a special edition, low-volume container, mystery flavor, but I know, or will know the flavor. That flavor. You’re not ready for that flavor. That’s why it’s a flavor of the future and not today, though my future could be your today depending on how far in the future you are, that of which, I cannot say because you cannot tell me, reader. Or do you refuse? But I digress.

My Creem Betweens eating exploits became well known throughout my neighborhood and even into bordering neighborhoods and somewhat beyond the neighborhoods bordering those neighborhoods, the neighboring-neighboring-neighborhoods, and the neighbor³hoodlums occupying them. These delightfully infectious confection contemplative, poetic, reflections spread quickly. By review two, retwoove, reTWOove, Classic Creem Betweens, though, cleverly, they’re not called Classic Creem Betweens, though we all know they are the classic, classic Creem Betweens, I was swimming in overheard rumors about my manuscripts, the reviews, which I typed out just as I type out this manuscript, review, and left about the neighborhood at the local anywhere that I saw books on display, and not just in libraries and magazine stands, but including homes, newspaper stacks, and heck, any old pile of squarish paper. So, too, did I leave reviews on murals displaying books on display, such as a mural of a bookshelf displaying books. I loved that mural. In my neighboring neighborhood, it just showed up one day. I asked around and they all said, those neighbors, they all told me the mural just showed up one day and that they had no idea who commissioned the Creem Betweens, I mean the mural. I loved it all the same and the mystery only made my mouth water even further. A single load, classic Creem Betweens has a way of doing that. With each Creem Betweens gnashed and throated, an incompleteness is followed shortly thereafter. I’ll have another one, you say aloud to no one in particular, "This will be the last, last one. This time for sure. I promise myself