The Awkward Art of Being

By Safiya Andrews

"The Awkward Art of Being" is a warm, engaging guide designed for socially awkward individuals, introverts, and the shy souls among us, walking them through the wilderness of social interaction. It doesn't just instruct—it entertains, turning the spotlight on the beauty of being 'awkward'. The book covers essential topics like small talk, networking, handling forgetfulness, mastering online interactions, and embracing one's uniqueness. It dives deep into the labyrinth of existential thoughts introverts often explore, simultaneously offering practical advice to navigate the bustling social landscape. It champions the art of solitude and self-care, offering relaxing and rejuvenating tips like meditation and DIY skincare. Drawing examples from popular culture, like "Stranger Things", it strikes a chord with both Millennials and Gen Z readers. It's not just a book, it's a friendly companion for anyone who's ever felt like they're battling social norms, whispering the reassuring truth that it's okay to be different—more than that, it's a superpower. This isn't your usual self-help book; it's a celebration of the awkward, the introverted, and the shy.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Author Breeze
• Release date: Jun 9, 2023
• ISBN: 9798988421818

Safiya Andrews

Having journeyed from the bustling heartbeat of Philadelphia to the pulsing communities of Brooklyn, and finally to the radiant open spaces of Arizona, Safiya Andrews has gathered a plethora of stories and experiences. These tales have intertwined to form a rich cultural narrative that she masterfully translates onto paper. Safiya's path, including detours through Atlanta and New York, has provided her with a broad spectrum through which she sees and translates the world. This is distinctly manifested in the depth and realism that imbue her work. Safiya's initial professional strides were made in the world of performing arts—her portfolio is adorned with achievements as a dancer, performer, and choreographer. However, it was her fervor for sharing tales that steered her towards earning a B.A. in Digital Film Production from Grand Canyon University. This crucial shift granted Safiya a new platform for her creativity: the realm of writing. In conjunction with her oldest of three children, Soraya Andrews, Safiya co-owns She's A Beast Films, an ambitious foray into the domains of screenwriting, production, and direction. Their critically acclaimed "Quarantine: A Visual Documentary" is just a testament to this formidable partnership's capacity for excellence. With multiple projects in the works, Safiya is carving a niche for herself as a persuasive voice in the cinematic sphere. But it is in the realm of writing that Safiya truly blossoms. She adeptly crafts vivid narratives, believable characters, and gripping storylines. Safiya’s written works, including genres from self-help and inspiration, psychological thrillers, to horror interspersed with doses of humor, transport her readers into realms both known and unexplored. Safiya Andrews, as an author, goes beyond simply creating novels—she artfully depicts life in all its tumult, allure, and complexity onto the fresh slate of each page, firmly establishing herself as a vibrant force in contemporary literature.

Book preview

Welcome to the Socially Awkward Club

Hey there, you splendid misfit. If you’ve picked up this book, chances are you’re a bit like me. You might be the type who'd rather deep dive into a good book than a pool party, who prefers a cozy night in with your pet instead of painting the town red. And let's be honest, you've probably been labelled as 'quiet', 'shy', or - my personal favorite - 'antisocial'. Well, I’m here to tell you, my friend, it's time to embrace your inner introvert, because guess what? You're not alone.

In this hurly-burly world, where being an extrovert is as glorified as avocado toast, we introverts often feel like the odd ones out. But let's spill the tea - being an introvert doesn't mean we’re weird (well, maybe a little), antisocial (we prefer the term 'selectively social'), or that we have an irrational fear of people (it’s completely rational, thank you very much). It simply means we march to the beat of a different drum, and that’s pretty dope if you ask me.

Now, let’s get one thing straight – this book isn't one of those self-help guides promising to transform you from a caterpillar into a social butterfly. Seriously, who wants to be a butterfly when you can be a majestic dragon, right? It’s about helping you navigate the social labyrinth without losing your sanity or, more importantly, your authentic self. We’ll tackle everything, from the agonizing abyss of small talk to the terrifying terrain of networking and, God forbid, dating!

We introverts are a rare breed, my friend. In a world that can’t stop talking, we listen. We observe. We think before we speak (most of the time). And we have an unmatched ability to enjoy our own company. We’re not flawed, we’re fabulous! And it's high time we embraced it. So, fasten your seat belts, grab your favorite snack, and put your phone on silent mode (because who needs another distraction, right?). Let’s embark on this journey together.

Welcome to the Introvert’s Club. No secret handshake required, just an open mind and a dash of humor. Remember, we’re in this together, one awkward social interaction at a time. Let's get this bread!

(Note: No extroverts were harmed in the making of this book… as far as you know.)

Get ready to buckle up, awkward squad. After my marriage hit the skids, my life went from 0 to 100 really quick. I found myself single-handedly steering the ship of single motherhood, while also grappling with my own emerging social awkwardness. It was like I blinked, and voila! I'd morphed from a socially awkward caterpillar into a full-blown, awkward-as-hell butterfly. Yeah, who saw that coming, right?

Then, on one fate-drenched evening, I decided to give these newfound wings a test flight and RSVP’d to a get together hosted by a buddy. You gotta understand, since my love boat hit an iceberg, I'd been swerving social gatherings like they were brimming with zombie virus. Stepping into the party felt like I’d stumbled onto the set of Keeping Up with the Klutzes. Everyone seemed to be effortlessly sipping bubbly and spinning conversational gold while I contemplated whether to blend with the wallpaper or ninja my way to the safety of the snack station.

Taking a deep breath and scooping up all the guts I could dredge up from my introverted core, I honed in on a group who seemed chill enough not to be put off by my conversational pratfalls. I mean, how bad could it be, right? Spoiler alert: very. Just as I was about to spit some words, my brain decided to take an impromptu vacation, leaving me stuttering like a parrot on tequila trying to nail a TED Talk. But, channeling my inner 'Dory', I just kept swimming, despite my AWOL brain, managing to cobble together a semblance of dialogue about the bliss of motherhood and my relentless battle against the monster known as homework. To my shock and awe, instead of edging away from the hot mess express that was yours truly, folks started sharing their own sagas of parental pandemonium. We chuckled, we empathized, we found common ground over war stories of unidentified goo and the black hole that is their room.

As I was bobbing in this whirlpool of shared laughter and wine sloshes, it struck me like a bolt from the blue. My social awkwardness, my botched attempts at banter, my total lack of 'cool' - they were my superpowers. They made me human, approachable, authentic.

So, here's the tea, my cherished awkward fam. When life throws a lemon grenade at you, don't just whip up some lemonade. Dive headfirst into that lemon-laden chaos and paddle like you’re on the final leg of 'Survivor'. Because when you have the guts to show off your awkward charm and let your quirks fly, you set yourself up for real, meaningful connections. So, here’s to us, the gorgeously odd, the socially clumsy, the wonderfully flawed. May we keep tripping, fumbling, and stumbling our way through life, and always find the humor in our perfectly imperfect escapades.

I've run into a wild assortment of social misfits in the unruly, meme-littered savannahs of the interwebs and beyond. So, strap in, grab your metaphorical magnifying glass, and let's yeet ourselves into a whirlwind tour of the stunningly varied terrain of social weirdness, shall we?

The Stumbling Squirrel

This specimen is a rare gem indeed. They're like keyboard wizards, whipping up legendary tales and articulate emails with the finesse of a DJ dropping sick beats. But place them face-to-face with a fellow carbon-based life form? Suddenly, they morph into an endearing hot mess.

Their tongues go rogue, pulling off some seriously wild gymnastics over innocent syllables, transforming a chill convo into an unexpected verbal parkour course. An easy 'hello' warps into a 'he-hello-hi,' followed by a sheepish smirk. A 'what's up?' might mutate into a 'wha-what's u-up?' adding an unexpected remix to a basic salutation. It's like their mouth decided to host a surprise dubstep concert, and every syllable scored an invite.

But you know what? There's a quirky kind of vibe to it. You'll find yourself leaning in, entranced by their charming chatter, hanging onto every rerun phrase and stumbled-over word. It's like watching a live improv show, where even the performer has zero clue what's about to drop next. And don't even get me started on the priceless facial expressions that often tag along with their verbal acrobatics. The deer-in-headlights look, the blushing cheeks, the here we go again grimace - it's a full-on performance that turns everyday chit-chat into premium entertainment.

Big ups to the Stumbling Squirrel.' They may not be the slickest communicators in the biz, but their charming monologues sure make for some memorable convos. Keep on bumbling and babbling, my peeps. Your quirks make this world a far more intriguing place!

The Chatty Chipmunks

Ever wondered what it'd be like to have a conversation with an espresso-shot-guzzling thesaurus? Look no further, 'cause these folks are your tribe. They're like human Red Bulls, zipping around with enough jittery juice to light up a whole town. Ever watched a chipmunk zipping from tree to tree, too zippy for the naked eye? That's bang on how these peeps handle convos.

They kick things off chatting about their morning brew, somehow pivot to string theory, then catapult over to their nana's top-secret pasta bake- all in the time it takes to draw a breath. And man, are they speedy. They're like those auctioneer types you see on the tube, firing off words so quickly you're left questioning if they're gabbing in English or some extraterrestrial dialect. You'll find yourself bopping your head, more in sync with their rhythm than comprehension, as they unleash their verbal hurricane.

But let's keep it a buck, there's never a dull moment with them around. They'll leave you feeling like you just hopped off a verbal Space X rocket - a tad dizzy, slightly winded, but grinning like a Cheshire cat because, wow, that was one heck of a trip. You might not catch every word, or any word for that matter, but you'll always be entertained. And who knows, you might even learn a nugget or two about string theory or the art of Italian cooking. So, big shoutout to the 'Chatty Chipmunks,' the virtuosos of the quick-witted banter. May your words always zoom as swift and free as your vibes!

The Perplexed Penguins

These folks, bless their hearts, are like human incarnations of a kangaroo caught in a disco light show - perpetually befuddled by the strobe lights of social nuances. They're like those goofy animals in viral TikToks who try to munch on the wrong end of a stick or get spooked by their own shadows (guilty as charged), leaving you snickering and aw-ing at their innocent goof-ups.

They're the ones who burst out laughing when everyone else is quiet, only to realize that the joke hasn't even hit the funny bit yet. Their high five attempts are missed so consistently, you'd swear they were playing a new form of dodgeball. They’ll often stand there, eyes wide as saucers, like they've just been zapped into a K-drama, when the group banter takes a sudden left turn.