Everyday Extraordinary

By Penny Armstrong Sparks

Everyday Extraordinary is a follow up to My Saturday Morning Posts, the compilation of a weekly journal posted on social media that followed Penny Sparks’ first year of grief after the unexpected loss of her husband. Through this format, her healing process developed into a continued walk through the “more” that everyday life can bring. So often we can see God clearly in crisis, turning points or big decisions, but what about the routines in our average days? He promises we will see and do more if we engage Him in the middle-of-the-road moments. This collection of thoughts is divided into four seasons in recognition of how we can feel differently and more deeply at different times of the year. Penny uses her everyday moments to share extraordinary lessons about the goodness of God. These stories will inspire you to see God in the seemingly insignificant stuff and show you how He doesn’t just work in the earthquakes of life, but in the gentle whispers as well.

• Language: English
• Publisher: WestBow Press
• Release date: Jun 1, 2023
• ISBN: 9781664296374

Penny Armstrong Sparks

Penny Sparks was launched into the world of writing after the loss of her husband. From privately journaling about her grief, to publicly sharing daily inspirations, she has found a sweet spot in taking everyday moments and turning them into extraordinary lessons. Penny is the author of My Saturday Morning Posts, and resides in Tennessee with her three boys and one sassy pup.

Book preview

spring

spring cleaning

Test everything. Hold on to the good. Avoid

every kind of evil. 1 Thessalonians 5:21-22

I have come to the conclusion that none of my weeks will ever look the same. God will continue to use the everyday moments to teach me...if I simply lean in and listen.

I was given the opportunity to assist a family in my community with a clean out effort. The goal was to sort through and decide what needed to be kept, what could be sold in a yard sale, and what needed to be hauled off to the dump. I watched one family member struggle with this all day long because...let’s face it...memories are attached to our stuff. By the end of the day, we had made seven trips to the dump. I am now on a first name basis with the waste management personnel because I discovered you are only allowed one trip a day...so some charming was involved.

After completing this project, I thought about the clean out efforts in my own home. Why do I keep so much stuff? The obvious answer is…there are memories attached to it. I find myself relating to the family I helped - staring deep into the piles of material possessions that had been hoarded over the years and recalling memories like it was yesterday.

I have always thought of myself as a feeler, but one day, someone said they had always considered me a thinker. I was a little surprised by that comment…but maybe they’re right. My emotions are tightly tethered to my thoughts like memories to my stuff. I can feel something and think it is true. I don’t always pay attention to it, but scripture calls me to think. It calls me to test the world around me and discern truth. There are days I don’t feel like a mom, but in truth…I AM. There are days I don’t feel like a Christian, but in truth…I AM. My feelings can bury me like a hoarder who refuses to let go of things that are no longer useful.

Let us examine our ways and test them, and

let us return to the Lord. Lamentations 3:40

Test everything. Hold on to the good. Avoid every kind of evil. 1 Thessalonians 5:21-22

Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is - his good, pleasing and perfect will. Romans 12:2

I cannot allow my emotions or my circumstances to govern my life because...well...they are always changing. I must anchor myself to the unchanging realities of God.

I must trust when I don’t feel like it (Proverbs 3:5-6).

I must be still when my heart feels like it will explode (Psalm 46:10).

I must be strong and trust I am not alone...even when I feel lonely (Deuteronomy 31:6).

I must believe God is faithful even when I can’t picture what that looks like (Lamentations 3:22-23).

I must believe I can do anything because of His strength (Philippians 4:13).

I must trust the story of God’s love for me (John 3:16).

I think you get the picture.

Let’s sift through all the emotions of our circumstances and throw out the things of no good use, while holding on to the treasures deeply embedded in truth. Let’s call it spring cleaning.

training vs trying

No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it. Hebrews 12:11

At the beginning of the pandemic, I set a goal to ride 5k miles on my exercise bike within a year’s time. I didn’t set this goal when I was sitting on the floor putting my bike together, nor a few months later when my seven miles a day increased to fifteen. Seven months into the year, I realized how good I felt when I finished each day. Sweating profusely, breathing hard, and that feeling of pushing myself became euphoric. As my body became accustomed to that feeling, I needed something to keep me challenged - hence the goal. I knew that if I was to reach this goal, it meant an average of twenty miles per day for the remaining months.

The closer I got to my goal, I realized my challenge was more than physical. There were many days when I came home exhausted from too many expectations or just dealing with the things that come with the activities of daily living. I had a multitude of excuses to throw in the towel, and some days, everything in me wanted to curl up on the couch under a blanket and watch TV until bedtime. But that goal...whispering in my ear...told me that no miles today meant more to catch up on the next day. Sometimes I would start at 10:15 p.m., barely getting my miles in by midnight. There were also those days when plans that kept me out all day, or late into the evening, required me to get up early to get in my pedal time.

When I reached this milestone, I reflected on why this goal meant so much to me. The years since Scott died have asked a lot of me...in every possible area of life. There have been, and continue to be, three God-given essentials to living, and without them...it’s not pretty. If I remove COURAGE, DISCIPLINE, and DETERMINATION from life, it’s like removing the heart - the part of me that says, I CAN DO MORE! It’s these three principles that keep me from giving up.

The world often offers us quick fixes that feel like a euphoric sprint, but when our heart rates come back down, we are in the same places we were before. Living the life God calls us to is a marathon full of hills and straight stretches. In this process, we gain spiritual muscles that push us up the mountains and give us wisdom and perspective in the straightaways. The key is in the training - the everyday time with God. Time in scripture builds our determination, courage, and discipline. It’s the difference between training and trying. You can’t try hard to run a marathon without conditioning...you must train.

No discipline seems pleasant for the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it. Hebrews 12:11

Until it was brought to my attention, I didn’t realize how far I had gone with my goal. Five thousand miles is the distance from Raleigh, North Carolina to Los Angeles, California…and back. It’s the same when I step back and look at things with God’s perspective (the big picture) – I see so many more lessons in my process...in the training.

There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven. Ecclesiastes 3:1

Set some goals! Stretch some spiritual muscles! Be determined, courageous, and disciplined.

editing my heart - part I:

interpretation

For the word of God is living and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart. Hebrews 4:12

In the past few years, I have seen a glimpse of how much words truly matter - not only the words that flow freely from my mouth, but the written word which is a permanent record of thoughts. I am a rookie at the author process who is fascinated with all the elements. When the publication of my first book was becoming a reality, one of the first steps was content edits. I was bothered by this because I didn’t want my content edited. My written thoughts were flawed and messy, full of run-on thoughts and dot-dot-dots. That was my raw self in the moment, and God was teaching me in my pain. How could someone who didn’t know me dare to edit my words? I was then reassured that my edits were about punctuation, paragraph breaks, and copyright, but would not change the thoughts of my heart.

Copyright and trademark are basically a person or company saying a word or phrase belongs to them. This makes me laugh. How can words belong to someone? We are all authors of our words and we put them together with emphasis, passion, and sometimes sarcasm as they flow from our mouths. We can create a perfect sentence, but totally change its meaning by the way we say it. That’s the fascinating thing about the written word - those who read it are given the privilege and responsibility to interpret. We must be cautious with our words in a world where so much of what we say is emailed, sent in a text, or sent as a direct message. Because so much room for interpretation is given, we can sometimes question what the author means. Maybe you have been there - you receive an electronic message, and you are not sure if someone is mad, in a hurry, or just being brief.

Phones, in some form, have been around for a long time, so adjusting to hearing but not seeing a person is not a huge stretch. Now that electronic messages seem to be used more than communicating verbally, we are faced with the question, should this be said in person? When the electronic message era hit, it became an efficient way to quickly communicate with a lot of people. However, it also became a way to have hard or important conversations without having to face someone.

During the process of content editing, I thought about my words, both the private ones handwritten in my journal and the ones I put out there electronically for interpretation. I have a habit of reading back through my thoughts over the past years and vividly remembering my emotions as I wrote them. I want so badly for my words to be taken just as I meant them, however, they will never be received in their purest form because we all interpret through a personal filter. Over the years, I have received sweet responses from individuals saying, I needed to hear what you wrote because…! When something speaks to us, it is because of our need in THAT moment. Someone’s written word can give clarity to something we have struggled to understand.

This realization affirms my need for God as I interpret the written words that make up the Bible. Have you ever read a verse and it meant one thing to you, then years later it takes on new meaning because of your circumstance? For me and my interpretation, this is what it means when it says scripture is living and active.

For the word of God is living and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart. Hebrews 4:12

There are several books I have read more than one time, and in my rereading, I might have noticed something new that adds another element to the story; however, it doesn’t compare to reading the Bible with the Spirit of God as my interpreter. The written word of God was never meant to be a book of historical facts or cool quotes about living. It was meant to help guide us through any and every situation. The verses that saturated my heart at one time now continue to take on even broader meanings. This is why we don’t read the Bible cover to cover and put it on a shelf like the latest best-selling novel we just finished. It continues to speak truth moment after moment, year after year. As I grow closer to my God, His words run deeper and take on more meaning.

As you read scripture, ask God to help you interpret His written word. After all, He owns the copyright and trademark.

editing my heart - part II:

something reserved for God

Guide me in your truth and teach me, for you are my God my savior, and my hope is in you all day long. Psalm 25:5

When I was in the last phase of edits for my first book, I was given the very expensive option of a professional editor picking through my personal thoughts to determine if they flowed well or were in the best readable form. I completely understood misspelled words or punctuation, but when those changes could edit my raw thoughts, I felt a wide range of emotions. Those run-on sentences that just kept going were my anxious heart’s expression. When I put words in quotation marks or all caps, it was because I wanted the reader to understand how important they were to me. If I had spoken these words out loud, there would have been hands flying around or fists clenched tightly along with tears and flushed cheeks. A face-to-face encounter that involved my words in all caps would have shown my eyes as wide open as they get. Can’t run from it…I am an expressive person. I own it!

The part of the process that hurt the most was how inadequate it made me feel. I was not playing by the writer rules. Rules are tricky because they can be healthy boundaries that protect and teach, but they can also restrict our very unique parts. Rules teach us to respect the authority that has been given to us and learning to respect these earthly authorities is part of the training to accept God’s heavenly authority in our lives. Even though we might not understand, we need to realize we are not the smartest person in the room, and that God’s ways are best. With my book manuscript, someone who didn’t even know what I looked like, much less knew me, was editing my expression. They were telling me that my heart poured out on paper was not acceptable. Those of you who know me can only imagine the flailing-of-hands moment I was having. I am all about constructive criticism and self-improvement, but don’t correct my heart! That is something reserved for God and God alone.

When I calmed down the defensive feelings of anger that accompanied my insecure feelings of inadequacy, I took a deep breath and realized…it’s my call. It’s my decision! My God has created this world and wants the very best for me. He knows that giving me a choice in the decision-making process is an expression of His love. He guides me, but when I fail or make the wrong decision, He doesn’t call me inadequate or inappropriate. HE CALLS ME HIS! Yeah - I put it in all caps! HE DELIGHTS IN ME!

For the Lord takes delight in his people….

Psalm 149:4

All my moments, good and bad, work toward the goal of being more like Him. He knows the big picture and wants me to embrace what is being done in me, knowing all the while that He never looks away. He delights in me even when I don’t feel delight worthy.

The whole editing process made me feel inadequate because I am new and ignorant when it comes to the world of publishing. However, God took those teachable moments and turned them into a confidence in my ability to make decisions - a confidence in my God who knows me and what is best for me. Sometimes this means playing by the rules and sometimes...not so much. I decided that my printed word would be just that...MY PRINTED WORD. I chose to edit my final manuscript with the help of some friends who really know me, not a professional editor. I took the approach of my good friend, Lee Sellers. When Lee sees the expiration date on a gallon of milk, he views it as a suggestion. To decide if it is still drinkable, he does his own assessment. This personal decision involves his nose taking a good whiff to see if it passes the test. If it smells good, it’s still good. I love Lee! The key is…it’s his decision and he doesn’t require anyone else to drink it past its suggested date.

Sometimes our decisions in life make no sense to others and that can cause feelings of insecurity and inadequacy. The way I see it, my decisions should not be based on someone else’s suggestions of what is good. My decisions need to be based on the sweet aroma of God’s presence in my life. It’s the whiff I get when I humbly ask what He wants for me.

So, the next time you are faced with decisions, and everyone seems to be throwing expiration dates at you, take the Lee Sellers approach. Treat the outside opinions as suggestions and put it to the Whiff of God test.

Taste and see that the Lord is good; blessed is the man who takes refuge in him. Psalm 34:8

celebrate your days

For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place. When I was woven together in the depths of the earth, your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be. Psalm 139:13-16

In the Sparks’ house, birthdays are a big deal. There is always cake, a fun birthday hat, good food, presents, and a full day of choosing for the one being celebrated. The birthday boy (or girl in my case) gets to decide everything about how we spend the entire day together. Everything revolves around the desires of the one we are celebrating - the food eaten, the outing, the event, the circumstances of the day. I have so many memories associated with these five sacred days a year.

When Cooper turned seven, we surprised him by showing up at school, checking him out early, and giving him the choice of how to spend the day. The option he chose was baseball. We all five loaded up for an impromptu trip to Atlanta to see the Braves take on the San Francisco Giants. Our seats were on the 11th row in left field behind Barry Bonds, Cooper’s favorite player at the time. At one point, he turned to me and said, Mom, this is the best birthday ever! Thanks! The look on his face as those sweet words came from his lips made the seven-hour round-trip drive worth every minute. I still love celebrating favorites with my boys. That is what makes our day of celebrating priceless. The one being celebrated decides what brings them joy and the rest of us concede no matter what…no complaining allowed. It may be bowling, hiking (urban or rural), movies, concerts, games, or trips out of town. It is all about one person that day.

Sometimes, I think it’s easy to forget why we celebrate birthdays. We are celebrating LIFE! We’re not only saying, so very glad you were born, but we love all the things that make you…YOU. We take a moment to think about what someone adds to our lives and how different things would be if they were not in our lives. Each year on Scott’s birthday, social media reminds me of past birthdays with him. One post from a previous year said, Looking forward to a gazillion more birthdays and adventures. When we are in the middle of celebrating, we don’t focus on how many more days like this we will have - we are in the moment, making it about the person. One of my favorite chapters in the Bible is Psalm 139.

For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place. When I was woven together in the depths of theearth, your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be. Psalm 139:13-16

I love that we are fearfully and wonderfully made. I love that all our days are ordained…no matter the number. Scott’s days on earth equaled around 18,966, and he lived them well. It’s interesting that we give people gifts on their birthday when we are actually celebrating the gift of who they are to us and another year of life with them. Every year since Scott’s passing, I have asked everyone to celebrate this day with chocolate cake because the man loved this decadent dessert.

When the birthdays of those you love roll around, do more than celebrate them – thank God for their fearfully and wonderfully made ordained days.

assurance in connection

This is what the Lord says: Stand at the crossroads and look; ask for the ancient paths, ask where the good way is, and walk in it, and you will find rest for your souls… Jeremiah 6:16

The week prior to the wretched Covid-19 shut down, I was with a friend, sitting in a crowded restaurant in downtown Knoxville. We almost couldn’t find a parking place, much less a place to eat because of Mardi Growl (a Saturday when hundreds of dogs dressed in costumes congregate downtown). The sun was shining, Winter was on its way out and Spring had one foot in the door. It seemed like a day we could all be outside and breathe in deeply like we hadn’t in a long time.

It’s interesting how things can turn so quickly. Social media seems to be the place to check the blood pressure of our culture. We can jump from politics to tornadoes to The Bachelor finale to toilet paper...in the blink of an eye. We ride the wave of emotions that accompany the current event of the minute, not the day or the week.

So why did the sudden changes that accompanied Covid-19 hit us so hard? We have seen terrorist attacks, school shootings, hurricanes - all these events had high death tolls and far-reaching circumstances. I think there were a couple of factors that contributed to the turmoil of this season. First, we don’t like decisions being taken away from us. For someone to tell us what we can do, where we can go or what we can buy - TO NOT BE IN CONTROL brings out every emotion in us! All the decisions about our involvements, investments, or activities of daily living were made for us. Education, entertainment, sporting events, and work environments were all decided upon by the powers that be and we had no voice in it. We were told that we needed to trust those in authority to make the best decision for all of us.

You have to take a step back and wonder if this is how we respond to God when we experience a crisis. Over and over scripture tells us to trust Him because He loves us, wants the best for us and sees the big picture. It’s so very hard to think about HOPE when we are in the midst of affliction. In these moments, we wear blinders that keep our sight on what is in front