Dr. Andrew Batsis, Husband! Dentist! Kiwanian! Santa Claus?

By Katherine J Batsis

The book is about Dr. Andrew Batsis, a loving husband, a gentle dentist, a gentle caring Kiwanian, who resembled Santa Claus and his family, friends, patients, and acquaintances. He made a positive difference in the lives he touched and was considered a mentor for the Kiwanis youth. The book has three parts: I The Memori

• Language: English
• Publisher: Inks and Bindings, LLC
• Release date: May 30, 2023
• ISBN: 9798886151299

Katherine J Batsis

Katherine J Batsis, "Kathi", was born in Concord, MA, and graduated from Lesley College (now University) and Simmons College (MA), has been an Educational Media Specialist for 25 years in Toms River New Jersey. Active in her profession (in local, county, and statewide school and library associations) in 2 part-time businesses, in music (square, round, and folk dancing, and performing in a musical ensemble, Go for Baroque) was inspired by her husband's activities in Kiwanis International to serve her community as a literacy volunteer, blood donor, and member of Soroptimist International. Dr. Andrew Batsis, Husband! Dentist! Kiwanian! Santa Claus? Is her first book.

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Copyright © 2023 by Katherine J Batsis

ISBN: 979-8-88615-128-2 (Paperback)

979-8-88615-129-9 (E-book)

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of the publisher, except in the case brief quotations embodied in critical reviews and other noncommercial uses permitted by copyright law.

The views expressed in this book are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

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FOREWORD

This book is a tribute to Dr. Andrew Batsis. The wonderful story exemplifies one man’s goodness, compassion, selflessness and human caring from the bottom of his heart. Devoted to the youth of our nation he offers endless guidance and encourages leadership. He succeeds to win respect and gratefulness to be remembered in a gentle and persuasive manner.

It’s impressive and touching as he does this with the help of his vivacious wife—Kathi. It brings tears to the eyes—giggles at the wit and humorous remarks. Accolades to this beautiful story! It’s a must read!

D.S.Z.

PREFACE

Who is Dr. Andrew Batsis? You ask. He was a loving husband, a gentle dentist, a caring Kiwanian, and he resembled Santa Claus. His round face housed two sparkling blue eyes and a nicely trimmed white beard, moustache, and hairline. His rounded belly shook when he laughed whole-heartedly.

He was the first born of Sophie Apostolou Batsis and Christos Batsis; the oldest of three children: Andrew, Ted and Madeline. Andy was born in Brooklyn, New York, on July 6, 1941—5 months before the attack on Pearl Harbor (Hawaii). His paternal grandparents influenced him and brother Ted as well as their parents when they lived in Brooklyn. When the family moved to Bradley Beach, New Jersey, and Madeline was born, they were influenced by Aunt Bess (Sophie’s sister) as well.

Andy’s education started in Brooklyn and continued in Bradley Beach. He graduated from Asbury Park High School, June of 1958. He attended Monmouth College, was accepted early at Tufts University, MA in 1963, returned to New Jersey and graduated Monmouth College in 1965. He graduated the New Jersey College of Medicine and Dentistry (renamed in 2013, Rutgers School of Dental Medicine) in the summer of 1967, when he also obtained his license to practice dentistry in New Jersey.

So far, there’s nothing special or different about Andrew’s life. Working as a dentist, he made everyone coming to him feel comfortable. He treated his patients like family, always smiling warmly, explaining clearly what needed to be done, and giving at least two options, sometimes more for treatments. He was always willing to set up a fee schedule for working families who couldn’t afford to pay all at once, but who could pay monthly. His patients said he was a painless dentist, and they loved and respected him. They also looked forward to talking with him. After 35 years of working as a dentist, he earned the Strathmore’s Who’s Who Award. His dental accomplishments were very special.

From 1971, Kiwanis became a large part of Andrew’s life. He was inspired by the Kiwanis Objects and made himself known in Toms River, New Jersey (his residence of 35 years). Soon after 1971 he became known in all of New Jersey Kiwanis, culminating in being elected Governor of New Jersey Kiwanis. He then became known internationally as a Kiwanis International Trustee and committee chair of Youth Services, et cetera. Over the years he became a HERO to the youth he guided and to many of his peers. This special book will give you the details of his heroic actions and thoughts, which made him a very special person.

ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

For their support and encouragement, I thank my brother Steve and his wife, Sharon; my brother, Manny, and his wife, Yvette; my sister-in-law Madeline, my brother-in-law Ted, my nieces, Sonya, Petra, and Shelly; my nephews, John, Ted, Chris and his wife, Jenn, and Greg and his wife, Tina. Whole-hearted thanks go to Aunt Dottie Zografos for her thorough reading of the manuscript and helpful comments. She wrote the Forward and it lifts my spirits every time I read it. The Reverend Emmanuel Metaxas provided me with books describing the Holy Sacraments and he read those parts of this book. His guidance was much appreciated.

My gratitude goes to Manny Alvarez for coordinating the speakers in the Memorial Tribute. Hearty thanks go to all the speakers at Andy’s memorial tribute on May 29th, 2005; they are mentioned in the book by name. I thank those who wrote letters and comments, and allowed me to include them in the book. Those who wrote short comments are listed alphabetically in Appendix A, and letters, found throughout the text are listed in the Table of Contents. I’m grateful for being given permission to include names of family and friends next to the appropriate photographs in Appendix C. I thank the folk dancers who allowed me to list their names in the Memorial Tribute, and those folk dancers that attended my 50th birthday party.

Hearty thanks go to Susan Laing for her work, her time, her support and encouragement. I thank Michael Drexler for suggesting Personal Reflections as the subtitle for the second part of the book. I thank Ethan and his brother Justin for their work on the book. Jan Flaska of Deerfield Academy (MA) was instrumental in providing me help from the following students: Alonso, Isabel, Kelly, Maggie, Margaret and Tierney. Larry Meegan provided Kiwanis International Conventions information to me. My gratitude goes to the reference staff at the Greenfield Public Library (in Greenfield, MA 01301), at the Ocean County Library in Toms River (NJ 08753) and Lakewood (NJ 08701), the Boston Public Library (in Boston, MA), and the Springfield Public Library (in Springfield, MA). My gratitude also goes to Lesley University Archives Department, Cambridge, MA.

Posthumous thanks go to my parents—Mary and John Lamonakis, and to Andy’s parents—Sophie and Christos Batsis!

INTRODUCTION

Let me introduce you to the book: Dr. Andrew Batsis, Husband! Dentist! Kiwanian! Santa Claus? It has three parts, a prologue, an epilogue and appendices. Each of the three parts has a unique writing style. Part I is a transcription of a DVD printing what was said during the Memorial Tribute held in the Saint Barbara Greek Orthodox Church in Toms River, NJ. Part II, Personal Reflections, introduces the chapters with a question. Part III, Kiwanis, uses subtitles before each chapter. The Table of Contents list the speakers and two dances from Part I, lists all the questions and food recipes found in the text of Part II, and lists all the subtitles and letter contributors in Part III. More dance music is found in Appendix E and more food recipes are found in Appendix B.

The Prologue is the only page that is written as a dialogue within a dramatic narrative. The Epilogue is the only page written in verse and describing Dr. Andrew Batsis from the time he was an altar boy to the date of his passing. The Epilogue leads the reader back to the Prologue. Also the Personal Reflections chapter, What do I remember of April 20, 2005? leads the reader to the Prologue. The Glossary, which appears before the appendices, includes the definition (or description) of Greek words, pastries, and music. Greek culture is intertwined in Parts I and II. Americana is intertwined in Parts II and III.

It is the intent of the author that 50% of the proceeds of the sales of this book be given to the New Jersey Kiwanis Foundation for their program, Young Children, Priority One. Dr. Andrew Batsis was actively supportive of this program at the time of his passing.

PROLOGUE

Kathi: It’s 6 o’clock, And. Time to eat.

No response…Andy’s asleep seated in front of the television. Kathi nudges him—no response. She listens for breathing, feels his neck, and phones 911.

Agent: What is the nature of the emergency?

Kathi: I can’t wake my husband, his neck is warm, but I can’t hear him breathing.

Agent: Where are you located?

Kathi tells the 911 operator their address.

Agent: Can you do CPR?

Kathi: No.

Agent: I’ll talk you through CPR while the paramedics come. Is he on the floor?

Kathi: No.

Agent: You need to place him on the floor.

Kathi: He’s too heavy.

Agent: Is there someone in the house that can help you?

Kathi: No, but I can get the neighbors, walking out the door.

Agent: What’s their telephone number?

Kathi: It’s faster I go over there than take time to look up their number, knocking on the door…Betty.

Betty: Yes, Kathi.

Kathi: I need Bernie to help me with Andy in the office. Bernie: What’s the matter?

A paramedic arrives and heads toward them.

Kathi to paramedic: No. This way. They follow her into the home office.

Kathi into cell phone: The paramedic’s arrived. Thanks for your help.

The paramedic gets Andy on the floor and begins CPR. Betty and Bernie sit in the waiting room when more paramedics and a police officer arrive. He asks Kathi questions while the three paramedics work on resuscitating Andy.

***

From the death certificate: The immediate cause of death a. Acute Myocardial Infarction; Due to (or as a consequence of) b. Diabetes Milletus; Due to (or as a consequence of) c. Obesity. Date of death: April 20, 2005. Time of death: 6:02 pm.

PART I

MEMORIAL TRIBUTE

Memorial Tribute to Dr. Andrew Batsis

May 29, 2005

St. Barbara’s Greek Orthodox Church,

Toms River, New Jersey

Manny Alvarez speaking:

"The Batsis family welcomes and thanks you for attending this memorial tribute to Dr. Andrew Batsis. Dr. Batsis was a relative, or colleague, or associate to some of you, and a friend to all of us. No doubt everyone here would like to praise him, but if everyone spoke for only two minutes each, it would take us over six hours to complete this tribute. Therefore, a limited number of people have volunteered to speak and thereby represent all of us.

"Today we meet approximately forty days after his death to celebrate Andy’s life, with a focus on the things that were important to him. At this time, the members of Kiwanis, an organization that meant a great deal to Andy want to express our respect and recognition for the past International Trustee, Dr. Andrew Batsis. I would ask if all the past governors of the New Jersey district would please stand. And all the past governors of the sponsored programs Key Club and Circle K, and all the members of Kiwanis who are here today – would you please stand? Thank you all, and thank you all for your association with Andy over the years. You may be seated. Thank you.

"The Lord is good. His mercy endureth forever. And His truth endureth to all generations. This is the day that the Lord hath made. We will rejoice and be glad in it. For His merciful kindness is great toward us. Praise ye the Lord. From Ecclesiastes we learn for everything there is a season, a time for every purpose under the heaven: a time to be born and a time to die; a time to break down, a time to build up; a time to weep and a time to laugh; a time to mourn and a time to dance.

"We gather here today as Kiwanians to demonstrate to the family and friends of Andrew Batsis, the deep respect and admiration that we all have had for a person who has shown to all who knew him an example of unselfish dedication, love, devotion to his family, to his country, to his community, to his profession, to his religion, to Kiwanis, and to his fellow humans. To Kathi, Brother Ted, Sister Madeline, and the rest of Andy’s relatives, we extend our sympathy for their and our loss.

"However, we call attention to the Wisdom of Solomon: ‘The souls of the righteous are in the hand of God, and therein no torment shall touch them. It is said of the unwise they seem to die and their departure is taken for misery, and their going from us to be utter destruction. But they are in peace. For though they be punished in the sight of men, yet is their hope full of immortality. And having been a little chastised, they shall be greatly rewarded, for God proved them and found them worthy for himself.’ (Chapter 3:1-5)

"Each of us present, and all who had the privilege of knowing Andy, has our personal remembrances of his intellect, his wit, his gentility, and his diplomacy. Long is the list of honors that have been bestowed upon this fine person. Each honor was earned by his hard work and unselfish devotion.

"His passing will leave a large gap in all our lives for many years to come. We will miss his kind, thoughtful and considerate assistance, and his counsel in all our activities. He will be missed by his family. He will be missed by his profession and his patients. He will be missed by his communities for his caring and dedication. He will be missed by the religious and fraternal associations—for his generous contributions of time, effort and full-hearted support.

"Kiwanis will miss Andy for his devoted service. His commitment to Kiwanis stemmed from his caring for people. In his Kiwanis club, he served in many positions, including club president in 1974-75. He served his division and district as Lieutenant Governor and on many committees. In 1979 he became Governor of the New Jersey Kiwanis District. And, from 1988 to 1992, Andy served as a Trustee of Kiwanis International.

"During his time in office he inspired all who knew him, with knowledge, his wisdom and commitment. For his efforts, Andy received every prestigious award available, including the Legion of Honor, the Hixson Fellowship and the Tablet of Honor.

But perhaps the position that Andy most loved was New Jersey Key Club Administrator and the opportunity to work directly with high school youth. For his outstanding performance in this endeavor, he was awarded the Key of Honor, the highest recognition given by Key Club International. It is no wonder that Kathi Batsis called him, Mr. Kiwanis.’

"But beyond his Kiwanis service, Andy will be missed for the person he was: a principled, steady, kind gentleman who was always reliable, who understood working with people, and was always supportive of others. He could always be counted on to get things done. In short, Andy typified what some of us recognize as a backbone of service organizations such as Kiwanis and, yes, the backbone of American citizenship.

"Solomon said that, in a way, the day one dies is more important than the day they were born. For on that final day of life, one commences on a new journey. Furthermore, on that last day there is a summing up of your life. What kind of life was it? Wise men will say that the best life spent is in the service of others. Dr. Andrew Batsis qualifies.

"On a personal note, I knew Andy for many years and had the privilege of serving as a Lieutenant Governor when Andy was the Governor. Never once did I ever feel disappointed, surprised, or dismayed over anything he did or said. He was a true gentleman.

"In 1992, at the Kiwanis International convention in Indianapolis, Andy made a bid for higher office, a move that would put him on the path to President of Kiwanis International. It was a very ambitious task for an individual from a very small district like New Jersey. When the election results showed that Andy had not prevailed, all of us who worked hard on his campaign were dejected. We were even more concerned that Andy’s disappointment would cause him to reduce his involvement in Kiwanis.

"Andy entered the room in which we were all gathered and saw that we were literally crying in our beer. He started off by warmly thanking everyone for their support, praised all for their individual efforts, and continued with many uplifting remarks and comments. Then he said, ‘They can take me out of Kiwanis, but they can’t take Kiwanis out of me.’ Such was the grace and character of the man, who faced with his own disappointment, found a way to care for others. He was one of those kind but strong people who you will always remember.

"In Andy’s religion and my family’s religion, the priest at a funeral service repeats three times the expression, ‘May his memory be eternal.’ In a sense, a person is not gone if we can continue to remember him. William Penn said, ‘This is the comfort of friends, that though they be said to die, yet their friendship is, in the best sense, ever present.’ A quotation from a statement made by the author Angelo Patri as far back as 1938, wisely says: ‘In one sense, there is no death. The life of a soul on earth lasts beyond his departure.’ You always feel that life touching yours, that voice speaking to you, that spirit looking out of other eyes, talking to you in the familiar things he touched, worked with, loved. He lives on in your life and in the lives of all who knew him.

"We know that his family and close friends will miss him, but we want all to know that we cherished his friendship and respected him and that we, too, will miss him. Each of us, in accordance with his own faith, will pray for our fine departed colleague. And, Andy, we say to you: You have lived Kiwanis. Your life symbolized what Kiwanis stands for, building better communities, touching the life of others. We are reminded of the lines: ‘If you would sense the past, touch a stone. If you would capture the moment, touch a rose. If you would glimpse the Eternal, touch a life.’ Your presence will always be felt, because you touched our lives. For all that knew you, may your memory be eternal.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, the hope today is that we will not be somber, we would like to celebrate Andy’s life, talk about some of the nice things, the funny things, et cetera, and a number of people are going to say a few words.

I’d like to tell you a little bit about his early life. Andrew Batsis was born on July 6, 1941, of Greek American heritage in the Sheepshead Bay {correction: Borough Park} section of Brooklyn, New York. Andy was very proud of his Greek heritage and the Greek attitude toward life as demonstrated, for example, in the Greek love for dancing. The words to the folk dance called ‘Lyrikos’ encourage us to celebrate life as we live it.

[The folk dancers dance to the music.]

"Ah, the Greeks love to dance.

"Andy was the first child of Christos and Sophie Batsis. If a tiny baby could think, it would be afraid of birth. But immediately after birth, Andy found himself in loving arms, showered with affection, and cared for at every moment. His grandmother, yiayia, Magdalini would peel each grape for Andy. That’s a loving grandmother would do that. His grandfather, papou Andreas, would walk Andy to and from school daily. His father, pop Batsis, would take Andy and his younger brother Ted to Ebbets Field to watch the Brooklyn Dodgers play ball. Both these trips would stir in Andy a lifelong love for baseball.

Mother Batsis raised their two boys and daughter Madeline in a loving home, and taught them to care for others, to be humble in their Greek tradition, to talk, to reason, to negotiate, to exchange thoughts, and not to fight. Andy’s peaceful approach to problems, as influenced by his parents, is well expressed in an Israeli folk dance called Ma Na’vu." How pleasant on the mountains are the feet of the messenger of good tidings, proclaiming salvation, proclaiming peace.

There are 18 International Folk Dance participants. Yechiel Amir who leads Lerikos, also choreographed Frangosyriani. Among the Greek dances he and his wife, Natalie, enjoy are Onero Demeno, Karagouna, and the 16 step Tsamikos. Edwin Beckmann leads Ma Na’vu. He and his wife, Jackie, are experienced folk and square dancers. The folk dance participants from Ocean County are Yechiel and Natalie Amir, Edwin and Jackie Beckmann, and Ethel Olsen (line dance leader). The Monmouth Folk Dancers include Bob and Regina Feldman, Charlie and Gloria Gross, Regina and Steve Knowlton, and Dan and Gail Oldfather. The Monmouth Folk Dancers meet every Tuesday evening (7 pm) at the Embury United Methodist Church on 49 Church Street, Little Silver NJ. Their email is www.emburyumc.org.

"Andy was a peaceful man. And he also loved the flower, Lily of the Valley, because this flower is considered Nature’s symbol for peace and contentment. Interestingly and coincidentally, this flower was growing around the home of Kathi’s parents, John and Mary Lamonakis, in Concord, Massachusetts, and also around Andy’s parents’ home in New Jersey. It is no surprise that Andy planted Lilies of the Valley at his and Kathi’s home here in Toms River.

"In the autumn of 1950, the Batsis family moved from Brooklyn to New Jersey. One of Andy’s fond memories was Mrs. Townsend, who was his fourth grade teacher, and she had a great impact on him. She was a kind, gentle, patient, mature woman, who taught and guided her students. She also provided a safe environment for her students to play basketball, by inviting them to a court at her home. Andy had fond memories of her.

To tell us more about our friend Andy, there are a number of people, starting with Steve Tsapatsaris.

Steve Tsapatsaris speaking:

In 1985 I met Andy at the St. George Greek Orthodox Church in Asbury Park. How I met Andy. He’d wait for me outside the door to open the door to go inside and sit in the back booth in the church. This happened every Sunday. Andy, he’d wait for me, to open the doors to go to the church and pray. That’s how I met Andy back twenty years ago. Thank you.

Leslie Wheeler speaking:

I ask you to go back with me to the year 1965. We’re in the Boston Commons, Massachusetts, November twentieth; it’s a Saturday, late in the afternoon. We’re in the United States of North America, western hemisphere, planet Earth. Two beautiful young people are sitting on the park bench. Andy says, ‘Close your eyes and make a wish.’ Kathi closes her eyes and makes a wish, and Andy slips an engagement ring on her finger. He says, ‘Open your eyes.’ She opens her eyes and says, ‘Wow, my wish has come true! Now take me home so I can share with my parents.’ And that was the beginning of their long long long life together. Putting that engagement ring on Kathi’s finger, with both sets of parents’ blessings, Andy returned to NJ and was admitted to the New Jersey College of Medicine and Dentistry, where he was a member of Xi Psi Phi fraternity.

Samantha Wheeler is going to read a rhyme for those times, written by Manny Lakis.

Samantha Wheeler speaking:

My Time in Rhyme with Andy Batsis, by Brother-in-Law Manny Lakis

I met Andy forty years ago in 1965.

There was a twinkle in his big blue eyes.

Said he was going to Tufts College to get his dental knowledge, so that in his life he could support his wife.

That’s where Kathi comes in

making her his closest of kin.

There was cheesecake not any finer

bought by Andy at the Claremont Diner.

Andy learned the diner burned

and Andy said don’t be hasty, I’ll find a different pastry.

They settled in Toms River,

where Andy was a dental giver.

He tended to his flowers,

must have been his magic powers.

Enjoyed having a long cigar

but never smoked them in his town car.

He joined the Kiwanis Club

and didn’t go to the local pub.

An officer he became

and obstacles he overcame.

Put mother in law on cloud nine,

each time he bought her a bottle of wine.

Christmas was no fuss,

we all got a toothbrush.

At Easter he patted my back

and then took a lamb off the rack.

Not to boast,

said it was my turn to carve the roast.

Andy always took a picture of the dinner table

and then would go watch the games on tv cable.

He didn’t care to bake

but enjoyed a chocolate cake.

Not a man to have a beer

but let me be very clear

In sports you could not surpass

as Andy could tell you all about the football pass.

He always knew the baseball score

and then again so very much more.

He took social security at the early age,

he didn’t know when he’d get the page.

My leg he was not pulling,

the proof is in the pudding.

We will all endeavor

to keep your memory forever.

Save a space at your place;

it won’t be long, some of us will come along.

Goodbye until we meet again,

upstairs, in the great bullpen.

Leslie Wheeler speaking:

On June 9th {correction: June 10th} in 1967, Andy and Kathi were married in the Taxiarchae Greek Orthodox Church in Watertown, Massachusetts, by the Reverend Emmanual Metaxas. George Cholaki was the best man and he’d like to share some memories with you.

George Cholaki speaking:

"I had the fortune of meeting Andy at Tufts. He was a Greek American, so was I, we were both 1st generation. We were in alphabet order, so, Batsis, Cholaki, we weren’t too far apart in a class of about a hundred, and ah, his family was in the restaurant business, and my family was in the restaurant business, so we became friends. I got invited down to Asbury Park, where they lived, got to see Peterson’s Diner that Andy ran, as a teenager this whole business by himself, and we were very fortunate and were able to go to the New York World’s Fair together.

Back in Boston we occasionally would go to Greek dances and of course we were programmed as young Greek Americans that we really needed to find a Greek American woman to marry because that would enhance our chances of having a successful marriage. So, if you noticed in the circle dance here, occasionally people cut in. So Andy and I were attending a social dance in I believe Somerville, a suburb of Boston and … there was this new dance girl out there, a new lady dancing out there that I hadn’t seen before, nor had he and I said, Andy, look at that live wire out there! She is just dancing up a storm. Of course, you could wait until after the dance and meet her, or you could just kind of slip in, you know, between her and somebody else." So, Andy was a little more bashful than I was then, so I kind of slipped in and met Kathi and brought her over and introduced her to Andy.

[Thank you George, Kathi says from her seat in the memorial gathering.]

We also found out that Kathi’s family was in the restaurant business, too. And with time Andy fell in love with Kathi. I would just like to read a letter from Steve Hoffman. I wasn’t Andy’s roommate those days, but I wasn’t that ambitious to live off-campus but Andy was and one of his roommates was Dr. Steve Hoffman. And this is the letter that Steve sent to Kathi that I’d like to read.

"Talking with you yesterday about the world losing a wonderful man could not be more appropriate. Andy was and still is in our hearts. That his love for you was absolute, since I’ve known him longer than you. I can say. I, too, loved and miss him. I miss last year’s Christmas card and look forward to hearing all is well with you again. As tears well in my eyes, I am trying to say all that is in my heart. Knowing someone for over forty years is not enough and we shared a bedroom as roommates with Kenny and Sam back in ‘64, and joined in friendship that stayed with us all these years.

"Andy’s mastery in the kitchen and sense of right was welcomed. I doubled dated and his meeting you was a highlight. He spoke with a glow in in his eyes and from his heart all the times he mentioned your name. Seeing the two of you in Phoenix for the Kiwanis Convention was a highlight for Vicki and I. That time, at the height of the summer for a month of 110 degrees, may have been a stupid time to come here but I am glad you did. Over the years I spoke with Andy and from my office to his, always knowing