Forgive Me Lord For I Have Sinned

By Aaliyah Jackson

Mae Jane Mathison was never the type to push the limits, or try something new. She was a studious librarian and church volunteer, so when she needed advice there was only one man she wanted to turn to - the new Pastor, Brian Ellis.

 

Pastor Ellis was a far cry from their previous pastor, Pastor Samuel. The first time she saw Pastor Ellis, she noticed a few differences straight away.

 

He was white.

 

He was only a little older than her.

 

He was insanely sexy.

 

Mae tried to shove her impure thoughts out of her mind. Being intimate with a pastor was too ridiculous a fantasy for her to ever indulge.

 

Or so she thought.

 

• Language: English
• Publisher: Aaliyah Jackson
• Release date: May 1, 2023
• ISBN: 9798223833093

Book preview

Forgive Me Lord, For I Have Sinned

Aaliyah Jackson

Copyright © 2016 by Aaliyah Jackson

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of the publisher, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical reviews and certain other noncommercial uses permitted by copyright law.

Chapter 1

Mae Jane flung the open book down on the counter in front of her when the door of the small library opened and couldn’t control the flush of warmth that began on her neck then spread up to her cheeks. That a librarian should be reading wasn’t something to hide, but she didn’t want anyone to know the type of material she got her enjoyment from. She knew it was silly to get flustered and that the romance novel she threw down wasn’t exactly risqué, but she still didn’t want anyone to catch her perusing it. As she got to her feet, she dropped the handkerchief she was holding on top of the book to conceal the cover and it was only then that she looked to see who came in.

Good evening Mrs. Washington, she said politely in a soft voice. Is there anything I can help you with today?

No dear, the older woman replied. I’m just planning to look at the new titles that have come in this week.

Well, you know where I set them out, Mae Jane went on. So take as long as you need.

That a customer came in so late in the day was somewhat of a surprise to her. It didn’t happen very often and most evenings she spent the last hour or so in the library on her own. Her usual routine was to make sure the tables and chairs were clean and tidy then return any books lying around to their proper position on the shelves. Her excellent mind for organization was the perfect attribute for a librarian and was partly what led her in to the profession, with her love of reading also taking her in that direction when she left school and needed to get serious about a career.

It was almost an obsession with her to have everything neat before she left work each evening to make sure the library was ready for opening the following morning. On the occasions when she finished this work early enough she would do some reading of her own, which was what she was doing when Mrs. Washington came in. She waited until the older woman was browsing the selection of new books that just came in at the start of the week before picking up her handkerchief to retrieve the romance novel she’d been reading and put it in her bag.

She wanted to find out how the story between the heroine and roguish hero ended and could do that it the comfort of her own home that evening, without the worry of being disturbed. It would set her imagination free that she was the woman being swept off her feet, which was as close as she got to it actually happening. In real life she was still single at 28 and feared that she was heading towards an end as one of the spinsters of Kingston. She wasn’t there yet, but her romantic prospects were limited by the lack of older single men in the community. It was even more restricted by her shyness and timidity around people in general and particularly the opposite sex.

That she was still a naïve virgin at her age wasn’t something that really sat well with her and she wished her life could be more like the heroines in the romance novels she loved to read. The pages of a book weren’t like real life, however, and being swept off her feet by a hero wasn’t something she was really expecting to happen.

She glanced at the clock on the wall to see it was now six o’clock. That was officially when the library closed for the day, but it wasn’t something she adhered to if there was someone browsing the shelves. She was usually content to wait until the person finished their business in the library and just lock up afterwards. On this evening, however, she was more concerned about leaving late because it was one of those on which she volunteered at her local church and it wasn’t just any night. It was Pastor Samuel’s last evening in the place.

Mae Jane was sad to see him go, since he was one of the few men that she found herself able to talk to. He was sixty five years old and she’d known his retirement was coming for a few months, but it was still a change that she wasn’t looking forward to. She’d become accustomed to having him there when she did her volunteer work in the church office and his community of helpers were now friends that stopped her being as lonely as she otherwise might have been.

Pastor Samuel was leaving the following day to return to his home town and she wondered just how that would alter things at the church. The gossip around the place in the last few weeks was all about who his replacement would be, but even he didn’t appear to know the man that would be taking over as pastor of Kingston.

Mae Jane found herself worrying that whoever did take over might have his own ideas about how the church should be run and that he may not need someone in the office at all. It seemed unlikely, but she’d only ever served under Pastor Samuel so was unaware of how others worked. In the end she knew there was no way of knowing what would happen until the new man actually arrived and she wanted to get to the church to find out if there was any news.

She glanced across the library to where the new titles were set out. Mrs. Washington was in no hurry to finish what she was doing by the looks of it and Mae Jane could only watch as the elderly woman picked up books to read the back cover then put them back on the shelf. There was no holding down her slight frustration as the minutes ticked by, but she stopped it from showing and just tried her best to wait patiently.

It was around fifteen minutes or so before Mrs. Washington finally came to a decision and walked across to the counter carrying a book. Mae Jane took it from her to make a note of who was borrowing it then stamped a return date on the small form taped inside the front cover. She worked quickly to get the last job of the day completed.

I hope you enjoy it, she said when she handed it back.

I’m sorry to have kept you late dear, Mrs. Washington apologized. Is that you off home now?

Not tonight, Mae Jane replied. This is one of my evenings for volunteering at the church.

Isn’t this Pastor Samuel’s last day? Mrs. Washington asked.

Yes, Mae Jane replied. He leaves tomorrow.

It will be sad to see him go, the older woman went on. He’s done a lot of good in the community during his years at the church. He’s been one of the best pastors we’ve had in this area.

Yes, he’ll be missed, Mae Jane agreed.

Do you know who will be replacing him? Mrs. Washington asked.

There’s no news on that yet as far as I know, Mae Jane informed her.

Mrs. Washington nodded her head and remained silent as if she was deep in thought before she eventually spoke again.

Well I better not keep you any longer, she said. Goodnight.

Goodnight, Mae Jane replied.

She moved out from behind the counter before Mrs. Washington left the building and looked at the slightly untidy state of the new titles. The compulsion rose to go and sort them out, but she resisted it to walk across to the storage closet. Taking a key from her pocket, she unlocked the door and opened it to get her coat. She put it on then returned to the counter to get her bag. The last thing she needed to do was switch of the lights and she went to do that then left the building. She used the keys she was still holding to lock the door and checked to make sure it was secure before setting off into the growing darkness of early evening. The church wasn’t too far from the library where she worked, but it was still well after six thirty when she hurried through the doors.

Well, well…, Glenda Orbin let out in a loud enough voice to make sure the people around her heard. It’s nice of you to make the effort to turn up on time.

Mae Jane couldn’t stop the flush of warmth erupting on her face. One of the things she hated most in life was being the center of attention, but that was exactly what she was at that very moment as all eyes turned to her. Considering she was in a house of God, she resisted the urge to curse under her breath although it was what she wanted to do.

Glenda wasn’t exactly a bad person, but there were instances when she seemed to delight in the embarrassment of others and this was one of them. Mae Jane glanced up from the floor to see the wide smile on the fifty five year old woman’s chubby face and quickly dropped her gaze again.

I…, I was delayed at the library, she said as way of explanation when she got to the women sitting at the front of the church.

That old excuse, Glenda went on in a slightly condescending tone. I thought you would have at least made an effort on Pastor Samuel’s last night here.

She let out a guffawing laugh that made her fleshy cheeks wobble and her impressively large bosom heave. The large hat on her head slipped when she threw her head back and she quickly reached up to take it off. It revealed her wig of choice for that evening and the dark red curls fell around her face.  Mae Jane was tight lipped as she dropped on a seat in the front pew beside the others and asked the only question she could think of that would get the attention away from her.

Is there any news of the new pastor?

Glenda was the longest serving of the volunteers that helped at the church. She was also the undoubted queen of the rumor mill, so it was no surprise to Mae Jane that it was the heavyset woman who spoke again. For once she seemed at a loss for information.

I haven’t heard a thing, Glenda said. Pastor Samuel is keeping the information close to his chest if he knows anything, but…

Her words came to an abrupt end as the man she was talking about came in view from a doorway at the back of the church. Pastor Samuel smiled as he moved in front of them.

Good evening ladies and thank you for coming as usual this evening, he started. I take it all of you are as curious as Glenda and Mae Jane about who will be taking over at the church.

Mae Jane’s embarrassment heightened that the pastor heard them discussing the new pastor, but that wasn’t an emotion Glenda suffered from.

You can’t blame us for taking an interest, the older woman said.

I wouldn’t expect anything less from you Glenda, Pastor Samuel replied. The truth of the matter is that I only received the details yesterday. The man that will be arriving is Pastor Brian Ellis, but that’s as much as I can tell you. He’s not someone I am familiar with, but I am sure he will keep the good work of the church going and will tend to his flock as diligently as I hope I have.

When does he arrive? Glenda asked.

I have been informed that he will arrive the day after tomorrow, Pastor Samuel went on. Which is unfortunate considering I will be gone by then, but I’m sure you ladies will welcome him with open arms and help him settle in to his new duties.

Is this his first posting? someone else asked.

No, Pastor Samuel answered. I believe he’s been in place at a couple of churches previously, so he is obviously someone with experience.

Why did he leave those jobs? Glenda asked.

Pastor Samuel gave her a disapproving look.

You should know better than to come looking for rumors and conjecture from me, he replied. I’m sure there were perfectly valid reasons for him moving on to new pastures. You know as well as I do that it happens all the time.

I wasn’t interested in rumors, Glenda muttered, but her words were drowned out as Pastor Samuel went on.

I’d just like to take this opportunity to say thank you for all your efforts in making my years here successful. It’s down to your unstinting assistance that we have successfully increased congregation numbers and made this a vibrant place for people to come and worship.

We certainly hope you enjoy your retirement, one of the other women said. And that you’ll come back and see us when you get the chance.

There was a murmur of agreement from the others.

Thank you, Pastor Samuel said. I’ll make sure to come and see each of you over the next hour or so to thank you individually, but I’d now ask you just to go about your work normally.

Mae Jane got up and walked towards the door that Pastor Samuel appeared from and, once through it, moved along a narrow hallway towards the small office at the back where she carried out her volunteer work in the church. Opening the door, she stepped inside then over to the desk. She removed her coat before sitting down to get started. Her first task was usually to type out Pastor Samuel’s sermon for the following Sunday, but there was no need for that this week.

She opened the desk drawer on her right side to get started with her next task. The donation money was sealed in a locked box and she found the key in her coat pocket that opened it. The bills and coins inside was neatly laid out along with the small sheet of paper that showed Pastor Samuel’s details of how much was there. She got to work checking it and as usual found that it was correct, so duly noted this and locked the box to put it away again.

The piece of paper