Mydidae

By Jack Thorne

One bathroom. Two people. One day. A relationship witnessed in minute, devastating detail.
A story of intimacy, fragility and the darker side of love, Jack Thorne's Mydidae exposes the private and disturbing moments a couple share, and explores what becomes of a relationship when it is held together not only by love, but by fear, guilt and despair.
'A two-hander full of unexpected menace that probes and chips at its characters, peeling back layers of skin... a potent piece of writing' Exeunt Magazine
'Like a punch in the gut... what makes all of this not only bearable but completely transfixing is the unmistakeable honesty of the writing' Whatsonstage.com

• Language: English
• Publisher: Nick Hern Books
• Release date: Apr 18, 2013
• ISBN: 9781780012148

Jack Thorne

Jack Thorne is a playwright and BAFTA-winning screenwriter. His plays for the stage include: When Winston Went to War with the Wireless (Donmar Warehouse, 2023); The Motive and the Cue (National Theatre and West End, 2023); After Life, an adaptation of a film by Hirokazu Kore-eda (National Theatre, 2021); the end of history... (Royal Court, London, 2019); an adaptation of Charles Dickens' A Christmas Carol (Old Vic, London, 2017); an adaptation of Büchner's Woyzeck (Old Vic, London, 2017); Junkyard (Headlong, Bristol Old Vic, Rose Theatre Kingston and Theatr Clwyd, 2017); Harry Potter and the Cursed Child (Palace Theatre, London, 2016); The Solid Life of Sugar Water (Graeae and Theatre Royal Plymouth, 2015); Hope (Royal Court, London, 2015); adaptations of Let the Right One In (National Theatre of Scotland at Dundee Rep, the Royal Court and the Apollo Theatre, London, 2013/14) and Stuart: A Life Backwards (Underbelly, Edinburgh and tour, 2013); Mydidae (Soho, 2012; Trafalgar Studios, 2013); an adaptation of Friedrich Dürrenmatt's The Physicists (Donmar Warehouse, 2012); Bunny (Underbelly, Edinburgh, 2010; Soho, 2011); 2nd May 1997 (Bush, 2009); When You Cure Me (Bush, 2005; Radio 3's Drama on Three, 2006); Fanny and Faggot (Pleasance, Edinburgh, 2004 and 2007; Finborough, 2007; English Theatre of Bruges, 2007; Trafalgar Studios, 2007); and Stacy (Tron, 2006; Arcola, 2007; Trafalgar Studios, 2007). His television work includes His Dark Materials, Then Barbara Met Alan (with Genevieve Barr), The Eddy, Help, The Accident, Kiri, National Treasure and This is England ’86/’88/’90. His films include The Swimmers (with Sally El Hosaini), Enola Holmes, Radioactive, The Aeronauts and Wonder. He was the recipient of the Writers' Guild of Great Britain Award for Outstanding Contribution to Writing in 2022.

Book preview

Jack Thorne

MYDIDAE

NICK HERN BOOKS

London

www.nickhernbooks.co.uk

Contents

Title Page

Dedication

Original Production

Characters

Mydidae

About the Author

Copyright and Performing Rights Information

For Sophie Gardiner

Mydidae was first performed at Soho Theatre, London, on 5 December 2012, with the following cast:

The production transferred to the Trafalgar Studios, London, in March 2013.

Characters

MARIAN

DAVID

ACT ONE

Scene One

MARIAN enters the bathroom. She’s wearing overlarge headphones.

She’s talking business French aloud. She’s wearing knickers and a Minnie Mouse T-shirt. She’s just slept in them.

MARIAN. Est-ce qu’il y a un service de bus pour aller à Paris?

Est-ce qu’il y a un service de bus pour aller à Paris?

Beat.

C’est bien le bus pour Versailles?

C’est bien le bus pour Versailles?

She picks up a toothbrush and begins brushing her teeth.

She continues saying French aloud.

C’est bien le train pour Lille?

C‘est bien le train pour Lille?

She brushes her tongue.

DAVID enters. He’s on the phone. He’s in a pair of grey boxer shorts.

She stops talking. He doesn’t acknowledge her.

DAVID. I’m going to start with that…

I’m going to start with that…

He looks at her. He makes a signal. She doesn’t understand it and laughs. He frowns.

Because I want to open hard…

If I start with that…

Well. It’s a matter of opening hard.

She washes the toothbrush and puts it away.

She turns off her iPod. She listens to his call.

She sits on the side of the bath.

She thinks and then takes out some dental floss.

She begins to floss. He looks at her as she does. He smiles.

She smiles back. She starts to sexily floss. It’s a hard thing to do sexily. She laughs.

If we don’t open hard…

It’s not about what’s right or what’s – right.

He looks at her. He covers the phone.

I don’t know why you floss after you brush your teeth.

MARIAN. I don’t know either. Is he being a dick?

He goes back to his phone.

DAVID. It’s my pitch. It’s my pitch.

…

Yes. Of course it’s our pitch. It’s our pitch. But it’s my pitch to lead.

He covers the phone.

Flossing creates shit in your mouth.

MARIAN. Ya-huh and I can taste it if I do it before.

DAVID. Taste what?

MARIAN. The shit.

He goes back to the phone.

DAVID. I’m the pitcher. That’s all I mean by that. I’m the pitcher and… that makes me the leader.

I know I sound like a tosser.

I’m just getting words