Diary of a Con Woman: Grab All You Can Whenever You Can

By Roy D D Perkins

The book has only two main characters: Belinda Zimmerman, the only one named, and a personified diary. Belinda records everything, including her innermost thoughts, in her diary. It has a life of its own. This is the story of a self-taught con woman, Belinda Zimmerman, who becomes quite proficient at conning, lying, stealing, and cheating people, organizations, institutions, and the government. During her endeavor, she amasses a fortune that she keeps inside the walls of her home. Although it started out to be a necessary endeavor in her mind, she soon discovers that she doesn't really need all that she is accumulating. After a while, her conning is only a thrill, an exhilaration of possibly getting caught. Even though she is no longer poverty stricken, she continues to act like the poor destitute divorcée in much need. As life deals some personal tragedies, she begins to change. Belinda begins to take care of others and to part with a little of her illegal material gains. She is giving of her time and of her money to worthwhile individuals and charities. Belinda finally falls in love with her fourth husband-to-be. His actions reveal to her how a person should live. He is generous, kind, and considerate to Belinda. After marrying him, Belinda's conscience begins to gnaw at her. She has a whole host of sins that she wants to reveal to him but is afraid to do so. She feels that many of them are unforgivable. On her deathbed, she finally confesses all of them to him. Here, he drops a bombshell that she never expected. However, Belinda does not repent to her Creator as she does not believe in a hereafter. She repeatedly refuses to talk to any clergy. She is adamant that there is nothing after this earthly life. Finally, she passes away into eternity where she discovers another surprise.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Page Publishing, Inc.
• Release date: Nov 12, 2018
• ISBN: 9781643504698

Book preview

Chapter 1

The Hospital Bill

Belinda writes in her diary:

Dear Diary, today, I received a large bill from the hospital for my two-day stay. I told them I couldn’t afford the place, but they kept me anyway. I called the billing department where someone said I could apply for a hardship in which my bill would be substantially less. She told me not to pay the current bill or any part of it until my hardship had been determined. If I can get away with paying less money to those greedy bastards, I’ll do it. After all, hospitals have a ton of money while I have very little of it.

I am to produce three months of bank statements and proof of income. As far as eligibility goes, my income is slightly below the income guidelines for hardship assistance. However, my alimony check would put me far above the line if I included it. I have decided to not reveal my alimony. They would never find out anyway as I cash the checks and use the cash for incidentals during the month. The money never goes into my bank account. So the hospital billing department is never going to know. They didn’t ask for a copy of last year’s income tax. It wouldn’t matter anyway. I have never included my alimony as income on my tax return. I figure, since I never received a W-2 or a 1099 from anyone, the government is never going to catch up with me. If I did include the alimony on my tax return, it would only mean that my tax liability would be a lot more. Let the government chase someone else.

A week later, dear Diary, I have obtained the bank statements and have signed a paper that reads what I am saying is true. I’ve kept copies for myself. From what I can see from the paperwork, the only penalty for getting caught is that I would be liable for the entire amount of money owed. There’s not much chance of that happening. I also didn’t tell them of my father’s lottery winnings, which he put in my name. He wanted me to have the money. He said he didn’t need it. I never claimed that on my income tax either. It’s probably because the winnings are from another state. It’s a good thing the right hand doesn’t know what the left hand is doing. With fifty states and the District of Columbia, the federal government apparently can’t keep track of it. If I ever get caught, I’ll plead ignorance. I am just a dummy who didn’t know any better. I will put all this paperwork in the mail tomorrow morning.

Belinda prepares her own tax returns. She hides as much income as possible so as not to raise her tax liability. She is knowledgeable about the tax system and is willing to take risks. She knows that the hospital isn’t going to check any further than her bank statements. The odds are good against being caught for concealing her father’s lottery winnings, especially as they come from another state. Her alimony check never enters the system as she just cashes the check from her third ex-husband. She then pockets the money for the month.

A month goes by.

Dear Diary, I just received a letter from the hospital billing department which states that I only have to pay 20 percent of the total bill. The hospital sent me a revised bill. I wrote them a check and paid the whole thing off. It looks like I got away with it. I don’t have any guilty feelings as I believe that 20 percent is still a lot more than their services rendered are worth. They grossly overcharged me, so I don’t mind doing what I did. Besides, the insurance company should have paid a lot more than they did. I also found out that this hardship is good for six months. So anytime I go to the hospital or emergency room, the hospital is only going to charge me 20 percent of the total bill. It’s no wonder that welfare recipients love life. They have it made. I know that the hospital is going to make up for it by inflating other people’s bills. The hospital screwed over me, and now they are screwing over a whole bunch of other people.

About three months later, dear Diary, I had to go to outpatient surgery today. I had to have my gall bladder removed. I was home in five hours. Reluctantly, my boyfriend drove me. They wouldn’t let me drive home due to anesthesia. I am still under the hardship as it doesn’t expire for another three months. Because of this 80 percent discount, I feel much better to utilizing the services of the hospital. I know, although still large, the bill is something within my means to pay. Diary, I can see why people bankrupt hospital bills. If I had to, I certainly would.

About a month later, dear Diary, I received the hospital bill for my outpatient surgery. I only have to pay 20 percent of the total bill again. I am sure glad I filled out those hardship papers a few months ago. I am going to pay this bill right away too. The quicker this goes away and gets buried, the better. Not revealing my alimony and my lottery winnings has sure saved me a bundle of cash. Oh well, the money is better in my pocket than with the hospital. Besides, they have plenty of money anyway. There ought to be a law against hospitals defrauding money out of innocent people like me. They deserve to be cheated. They get away with robbery every day. If one decides to contest the bill, the hospital threatens them with collection agencies which eventually ruin one’s credit.

Diary, the government should put a stop to hospitals over charging people. The amount of $40,000 for a five-hour outpatient operation is utterly ridiculous. It’s no wonder people hate hospitals. And if they are wrong, you don’t get your money back. And they don’t do the next treatment for nothing. They charge you all over again. Hospitals have put people into bankruptcy. Well, they’re not going to do it to me. I will cheat, lie, and steal to avoid paying those bastards. That’s the only way to break even with the bastards.

Dear Diary, the world of medicine is evil and corrupt. I have noticed that the people with the most money get the best treatment. In the hospital and emergency room, I see signs all over the place which say that if one has no money or insurance, the hospital will stabilize the person and then send that person to an inferior facility which caters to the down and out. Apparently, people with more are more equal than those without it. I guess the Constitution doesn’t matter anymore. We have a system where good treatment is directly proportional to the amount of money and/or insurance coverage that one has. I wonder where the hospital sends those who have no money and/or insurance. Perhaps, the hospital sends them to a VA hospital. Treatment is pretty terrible there.

Dear Diary, why can’t we have socialized medicine guaranteed by the government? All the modern industrialized nations have it. Even a dirtbag country like Cuba has free health care. The United States is the only industrialized nation in the world that doesn’t have free health care. America can put men on the moon but can’t give all its citizens access to free health care. America can have military bases all over the world, which costs billions of dollars, but can’t give all its citizens access to free health care. America can spend a ton of money for military retirements but can’t give all its citizens access to free health care. The only way to beat this inequitable system is to grab whatever you can whenever you can. Perhaps, if the United States stopped giving billions and billions every year to our phony allies, then there might be money for social programs in America, such as health care.

Dear Diary, why does a certain drug cost $340 in the United States while costing only $1.28 in Cuba? Why is sixty minutes of physical therapy reduced to thirty minutes while the cost stays the same? Why does the doctor spend ten minutes with the patient when the bill submitted is for thirty minutes? Why does the patient pay to see a physician and end up with a physician’s assistant for the same amount of money? Why does the insurance company say that annual physicals are free when the patient is billed for incidentals? Why can a physician walk by a patient’s room in the hospital and then bill that patient for services rendered? What makes the physician’s time so valuable and my time so worthless? If I am late or a no-show for an appointment, I am charged. Yet if the physician takes off on some emergency or doesn’t even show, that’s his or her privilege. Doctors and hospitals have been given free range to charge astronomical rates, to charge for doing absolutely nothing, to charge the same while reducing the time, to charge a doctor’s fee for an assistant, to demand patients be on time when they are not held to the same criteria, and to charge for bad diagnoses. It would not be allowed to apply these same criteria to other businesses, such as auto repair shops, grocery stores, hardware stores, or donut shops.

At most businesses, the work is performed, then the fee is collected. Why do doctors and hospitals have to have their money up front before services are rendered? If medical insurance is so great, why are patients left with hundreds or even thousands of dollars to pay on the balance of the bill? Why do labs and clinics perform blood tests and X-rays on people and then refuse to send the physician, who is not in their network, a copy of the results? Many clinics and labs only send results to their in-house physicians. What good is the blood test or the X-ray if the primary care physician doesn’t get a copy of the results? Why go for the test in the first place? The only solution is a national health plan to cover all Americans.

Dear Diary, doctors and hospitals are not interested in my well-being. Bottom line, they are only interested in payments from insurance companies and patients. Nothing is more important to them than money. Whether legitimate or not, they will gladly destroy your credit when nonpayment goes over sixty days. These people must go home at night and dream up ways to augment the bills. Jesse James couldn’t hold a candle to these guys. Proof of the pudding (this happens every time): if the hospital sends a bill out for $50,000, groups like Medicare can say the procedure is only worth $6,000. Therefore, $6,000 is all they can legally collect. Well, Diary, Medicare is protecting the old folks, but who is watching out for those who are not yet sixty-five years old? The answer is nobody. Diary, it makes my day when I can cheat the hell out the medical system because they don’t mind cheating me. People should be proud when they can defraud doctors and hospitals. I personally encourage the practice. I have no pity for the medical system or for those who are employed by it.

Chapter 2

Belinda’s Unclaimed Income

Belinda certainly saves a considerable amount of income tax money by not claiming her alimony and out-of-state lottery winnings as income on her federal and state income taxes every year. Her alimony and lottery winnings equal about 40 percent of her annual net income. This is a good chunk of tax-free change. Dad thinks that Belinda is claiming all this income on her income tax returns. Her third ex-husband doesn’t care whether she claims his alimony check or not. If caught, she could go to prison for evading income tax payments to the federal government as well as the state. She figures that it’s a good gamble that she won’t get caught. Alimony is income to the recipient and a deduction for the one who is paying it. This is a common area where the federal government is not able to connect the dots. With the lottery winnings coming from another state, it is unlikely the federal government can put it together.

Dear Diary, Dad thinks that I claim his lottery winnings on my income tax. However, this would greatly reduce my federal and state refunds. Besides, how the hell are they going to catch me? It’s from out of state. The individual states don’t talk to one another. Every year, one state sends a check to another state. Neither state knows about the other in regard to the winnings. If the other state sends a W-2G to the federal government, why haven’t they caught me yet? I think that either the state never sends the W-2G or the receiving state just files it away somewhere. In either case, I am saving money. It’s too bad these winnings are going to run out in eight years. I will miss that money.

The problem here is that America consists of fifty states and the District of Columbia. Instead of being one nation, America is really fifty-one different countries united as one individual country. State laws vary a lot. It’s like being able to travel from one country to another without a passport. One would think that with sophisticated computers, the federal government would be able to track taxpayers through their social security numbers. Unfortunately, the government and employers still work with paper by using such forms as W-2, 1099, and 1040. Forms are flying through the mail here and there with no one keeping track of what goes where. Then they are just filed as a history of the taxpayer.

Diary, income taxes should not exist. Why should I give my money to the federal and state governments? What did they ever do for me? I only pay taxes on about 60 percent of my income. Every year I get a big fat refund from the federal government and the state. If I were up-front about it, I’d be mailing checks to the federal government and the state every year. Why should I support those bastards? Millionaires and billionaires don’t pay their fair share, so why should I? The less I pay the government, the better. The government wants my money so that it can send Pakistan three billion dollars every year for being our friend. Pakistan is about as much a friend as a cobra. NATO is a conglomerate of a bunch of European countries that are hiding behind an alliance. And who pays all the bills? The United States? If I keep my money, I will certainly spend it more wisely.

The US tax code is based on the honor system. Unfortunately, most people are not honest. If there is a question as to which way to go on the 1040, most people will choose the way that benefits them. The tax code is supposed to be an equitable and progressive form of taxation. In reality, the rich pay little to nothing, the poor pay little or next to nothing, and the middle class foots the whole bill. Eventually, the system will implode.

Then again, Diary, there is my monthly alimony check from my third husband. Unfortunately, that’s only good for another six years or upon his death. I hope he lives at least another six years. He can drop dead after that. Now I know that he can claim it as a deduction on his income tax, but he doesn’t. He doesn’t even know he can do that. So if he’s not claiming it as a deduction, why do I have to claim it as income? Except for me and him, no one knows that a check is coming from him to me. The government isn’t ever going to find it out. I know that his tax preparer isn’t going to list the alimony as an expense because I am his tax preparer. And I am certainly not going to say anything. That’s cash in my pocket.

Belinda is making sure that her ex-husband doesn’t claim his alimony payments as deductions on his tax return. However, she is wrong about the income side of it. She still is obligated to claim the alimony payments received as income on her tax return. This is only one of the ways where she is evading income taxes which is illegal. However, she will probably never be caught.

Diary, I think that alimony is a great concept. It’s a system whereby my dumb ex-husband pays me not to live with him. Being a woman is great. I got a house from my first husband although it does have a mortgage hanging over it. My second husband left me a late-model truck without any loan contingencies. And my third husband feeds me alimony checks every month. I haven’t claimed any of this on my income taxes and never will claim any of it.

Diary, my third husband keeps asking me to allow him to buy out his alimony payments. I keep saying no. The little up-front money he’s offering in no way makes up for years of payments. I think he wants to get married again and wants this albatross off his neck. His fiancée is probably behind it. The only way I can lose is for him to die or if I get married again. Neither situation is about to occur in the very near future. Money is more important than anything. Between the tax-free lottery winnings and the alimony, I am socking a lot away for a very rainy day.

Dear Diary, the government must be run by very stupid and naive people. Using the honor system for filing income taxes is ridiculous. Everyone is going to cheat, and everyone in the IRS knows that everyone is going to cheat. People are born liars and will do anything to avoid paying income taxes. At tax time, even the most reverential are going to turn into liars and thieves. Since everyone is doing it, I might as well get in front of the line before the pot is empty.

Belinda does have a point. If the federal government collected all that was owed to them, there would be no national debt. There are probably many more fraudulent returns than honest returns. The problem is that the federal government doesn’t have the staff or the time to validate them. IRS audits by way of random selections or red flags. One has some control by making sure that he or she doesn’t raise any red flags. One cannot control random selection, but random audits are less than 1 percent anyway.

Chapter 3

Dad’s Social Security and Retirement

Dear Diary, Dad passed away last night. I loved him so much. I just can’t deal with the grief. I am taking a few days off from work. Luckily, he made his funeral arrangements several years ago. It’s all paid in full. There are calling hours, but I don’t expect too many people to show up. He was like me—a lone wolf. He was the only person I could talk to. He understood me. He never talked down to me. He was generous and so kind. He lived across town in a small ranch. Now I have to clean out the house and put it up for sale. The money will be nice, but I still would rather have Dad back in my life. He was an integral part of my life. I am going to miss him very much.

Dear Diary, I found a company in town that cleans out houses that are going on the market for a small fee. They did a good job. They cleaned up the place, took the junk to the dump and kept anything that might be of some value. The fee they charged was very reasonable. Now I have to secure the place against vandals and put it on the market. Fortunately, Dad put the