When Your Heart Finds Its Home

By Ilene Modica and Gary Modica

The pandemic hindered but didn’t deter this couple from fulfilling their dream. This book is the encapsulation of that dream and a guide for those searching for something more. Whatever you may feel is missing in your life, a bit of soul searching—and travel—may help you find it.

This was their experience, and they knew it the moment they left Italy after their first trip to the “Old Country.” They made a commitment then to return, not as visitors, but as Italian citizens.

This travel memoir can stand alone, but is the continuation of Our Italian Journey, which concluded with Gary and Ilene’s return to Arizona after a year of traveling through Italy searching for their “perfect Italian town.” Did they find it?

Home is wherever we feel settled and at peace, and if we’re lucky, home can bring forth a new life, full of possibilities. These possibilities came to fruition for Gary and Ilene in their perfect Italian town. A home is a feeling – not a place. They invite you to join them on the final chapter of this quest.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Ilene Modica
• Release date: Oct 22, 2022
• ISBN: 9780463477380

Ilene Modica

Ilene and Gary are award-winning bloggers and authors of two books.Their very first memoir has been transformed recently into an audiobook! The best part is, that they've narrated it themselves, enhancing the connection between author and audience, and bringing their written words to life in a new way. Listening to their authentic voices recounting the stories and experiences that have shaped their lives has been an incredibly personal and emotional journey."When Your Heart Finds Its Home," (their second book) is a continuation of their first - but... it is also a stand-alone memoir. Finding their "perfect Italian town" became a reality and now they are living La Dolce Vita in Italy.The first book, “Our Italian Journey,” was written while living in Italy for one year in 2019. Writing as they traveled through various towns they stayed and explored, they share their trials and tribulations, as well as the laughter in this lighthearted book. They describe artful depictions of Italy’s seducing charm, their experiences in daily life, Italy’s cultural differences, and the well-known Italian zest for living. Live vicariously through them in their spiritual experiences throughout this beautiful country they can now call home.It took them three years to become Italian citizens through the Jurs Sanguinis and Jurs Matrimonii application through the Los Angeles, California Consulate. They would describe this process as a rollercoaster ride and currently help others with their applications, questions, and travel advice. Obtaining Italian citizenship became personal for Gary in wanting to bring his name back home to Italy.Currently, they are living in Lucca, Italy.

Book preview

Return to Italy in 2021

Primavera, Spring

New Best Friends | Italy Begins to Reopen

Estate, Summer

The Choice: Lucca | Tony The Guy | Le Mura | The Town | Summer excursions: Andrea Bocelli | Norcia | Viareggio | Florence | Borgo a Mozzano | Adventure Meeting People | Tempranillo Festival 2021

Autunno, Fall

Pisa | Sesto Fiorentino | Daily Life | Stop & Taste the Vino | Lucca Comic & Games | Anniversary | Thanksgiving Italian Style

Inverno, Winter

Arezzo | Florence | Return to States | An Italian Invitation | Travel Opportunity | Winter Surprises | Christmas | Happy New Year | Medical in Italy | New Friends | Lerici | Visits from Friends | Montecarlo | Carnival of Viareggio | Vintage Fiats

Life in Lucca After a Year

The Future

Our Favorite Hangouts

Events in Lucca

Things We’ll Never Get Used To

Acknowledgements

Map of Lucca

Mentions in This Book

People We’ve Met

Personal Request & Note

In Memory

About the Authors

Introduction

Ilene

Many of us go through life searching for… something. Some may never quite find what they’re looking for. Others may not be aware of what that something even looks like. Is something missing? Are we sure? Should we consider listening to that little voice, telling, nagging, prompting us, for… something more? In such cases, a bit of soul searching is often necessary. That little voice could linger as a desire, a dream, or crazier yet—the meaning or purpose of your life. Your happiness more than likely won’t come to you—but it can come from you. I truly believe each heart beats differently and for different reasons. Mind you, I’m not referring to your heart’s rhythm—but what we each search for in life. What would bring satisfaction, joy, or contentment to your life? What might that look like… for you?

***

For Gary and me, it became the hunt for our perfect Italian town. Now, this took some doing because our search—and our love for a country five thousand plus miles away from our home in Phoenix, Arizona—took quite a few trips and much exploration. This pursuit launched a lot of fun and excitement—even so, might our expectations have been set too high? Could we leave family behind to create a completely new chapter in our lives—living far away from family and friends… at this stage of our lives? Could we endure months-long separations from our kids and grandkids—especially during holidays and birthdays? Would it be possible to endure these tugs to our heartstrings and emotions? Were we selfish for wanting this new life for ourselves?

The Journey

Ilene

We went to Italy for the first time in 2010, long before Gary ever thought of trying to obtain, dual citizenship. We planned this vacation like any other, for a typical two-week duration. It became one of those zany itineraries trying to jam-pack everything into the days allotted without killing ourselves. Like most, we only had so much vacation time saved up from our jobs.

We arrived in Venice and took the train to way too many cities and towns. The flight home from this very first trip to Italy turned out quite thought-provoking. Sitting on the plane, I could see Gary’s mind working on something privately. His silence spoke volumes. After settling in for the long flight back to the States, we both turned and faced one another—we each revealed we didn’t want the vacation to end. I'm sure everyone experiences this sense of emptiness or letdown at the end of a great vacation. However, this time was different. Plain and simple—we didn’t want to leave Italy. While in Italy, we both sensed we were home. Home in a country we’d never been to before. How was that even possible? It was insane… crazy. Nevertheless, our feelings were real—we couldn't deny or ignore them. Neither one of us.

***

By the time we returned home to Arizona, we had already begun planning our next trip to Italy. Like many people who’ve had the pleasure of visiting Italy, one trip to this beautiful country was not enough, and we weren’t any different. We took three more, dazzling trips to the boot between 2012 and 2017. We were thrilled with each trip we took and always eager to return. Yet for Gary, that something kept gnawing at him about his genealogy and whether he could become an Italian citizen. His grandfather was born in Sicily and when he emigrated to America in 1909, he never became an American citizen. Bingo. The lightbulb went on.

***

Gary

By far, one of our most frequently asked questions through the years has been, Why go through the hassle of obtaining citizenship with another country—Italy? The benefits are many and straightforward. Let's reveal some for you.

First, one of the most significant benefits of Italian dual citizenship is the ability to travel, live, and work in any… any of the twenty-six member states of the Schengen Area. The Schengen Agreement, signed in June 1985 in Schengen, Luxembourg, established the abolition of internal border controls among many, though not all, European countries. Fortunately for us, Italy is a member of the Schengen Area. We can live for however long we'd like in Italy or any other member country. We can freely work, redefining our retirement status if we wanted to, without acquiring a Work Visa. These types of visas usually come with time limitations and are very specific in the details.

Furthermore, the subject of the education system is by far, more affordable than in the United States. Italy is home to some of the oldest universities in the world offering high-quality education with low tuition fees. Imagine attending a school whose alumni list included Leonardo da Vinci, Michelangelo, or Niccolò Machiavelli.

For us, being retired, the US healthcare system became extremely expensive. With Ilene retiring early and under sixty-five years old, we could only afford catastrophic healthcare for years. With an Italian National Healthcare card, we would have secure access to one of the best and most affordable healthcare systems in the world. It’s our understanding, that Italy’s quality healthcare system is among the top five rated in the world, while the United States ranks toward the middle of the list. This, of course, depends on the source you use to acquire this information.

Another benefit is being able to take part in numerous tax deductions when purchasing a home in Italy. There are many rules and regulations when it comes to this topic, but the advantages are many. As they can change frequently, you would need to research the current guidelines on an official site on the Internet if you wanted specific information.

Even so, one of the most alluring reasons people choose to become Italian citizens inevitably amounts to the benefits you pass along to your children. If you’re already an Italian national, you pass this right to your children and grandchildren—even if they aren’t yet born. Future generations can enjoy all the same benefits. You pass an unbroken link of advantage, privilege, and opportunity to them. It's a gift that continues to give. In our case, thank you Pop, my paternal grandfather.

***

Ilene

Like most immigrants of the nineteenth and early twentieth centuries, the reason countless Italians left their beloved country was to escape poverty, harsh conditions, and to provide their children with a better life. A life that a substantial number imagined was available to them in America, where the streets were supposedly paved with gold. Gary’s grandparents left Italy not because they didn't love their country—far from it. They brought their Italian heritage, traditions, and culture to their new country to start a better life. To enhance life for them and their children, and generations to come. The Italians, perhaps more than any other immigrant wave in America, succeeded beyond their wildest dreams—according to YouGovAmerica, (Linley Sanders, These are America’s Favorite Foods From Around the World, March 12, 2019) Italian cuisine is the number one favorite food (eighty-eight percent) in the United States today, if not the world. Becoming an Italian citizen would bring Gary’s heritage full circle and honor his Pop in a way he could not have imagined all those years before.

***

At any rate, you know our story. Gary's quest to acquire Italian citizenship was formidable and the cost substantial. Patience was essential, as time wasn’t something under our control, but completely in the hands of the Italian government. Oh boy… Gary’s application for Italian citizenship was the culmination of the roller coaster ride of our lives. This journey took nine days short of three years through the Los Angeles Italian Consulate. Once Gary’s citizenship was approved, I automatically received mine. The 1983 Italian Law, abolished automatic Italian citizenship through marriage on April 27, 1983, however, those married prior to this date are excluded from this ruling. Due to the fact we were married in 1980, before this law took effect, I was automatically granted the honor of Italian citizenship at the time Gary became an Italian citizen. At long last! After all that time, effort, and focus, we now had some decisions to make. What would we do with this little, maroon-colored Italian passport we finally obtained?

***

Our story continued with a year of traveling through Italy—a year of spontaneity, adventure, and happiness. As we embarked on a completely new chapter in our lives, we decided to document our journey to help others with their own personal pilgrimages. The work culminated in our first book, Our Italian Journey. An unexpected memoir of our first year living like Italians through Italy.

We now also had a new mission—we needed to find our new home. Our new mission: finding our special place in a country where every village offers gorgeous scenery, fabulous food, and charming people. Had it been everything we’d hoped for—just the one-year adventure? Where would our hearts find its final home?

Return to Italy in 2021

Ilene

Like thousands of others, our plans to travel in 2020 didn’t materialize and, unfortunately, returning to Italy in May of 2020 didn’t occur. The reason, of course, was COVID-19, which literally and figuratively stopped… everything on Earth. To say that the last two and a half years has been challenging for every one of us is the understatement of the century. First and foremost, if you, dear reader, lost a loved one, friend, or colleague, Gary and I offer our heartfelt condolences for your loss. Those who did not suffer personal loss of life, likely had children or grandchildren who suffered through remote learning, lacking important and quality time with teachers and classmates. I often wonder if our young grandchildren will remember this pandemic. Will some remember not attending school, or missed gatherings with friends for sleepovers, and birthday parties? Will they remember wearing a facemask everywhere they went? My heart broke for our oldest grandson, Aidan, who graduated high school without any hoopla. I’m curious how this pandemic will end up recorded in the history books. We’ve all been through a rollercoaster ride of emotions. I can easily recall that my emotions ran the gamut from sadness—to fear—to anger.

***

As Italian citizens, we could return to Italy at the beginning of 2021. Citizens could always return to Italy; the issue became finding a flight. Gary and I talked about it—discussing it often, wondering… should we go? Should we stay with our children until the worst of the pandemic subsides—will it ever?

***

When we return to Arizona, we enjoy staying at Melanie and Jerry’s home. Melanie is Gary’s daughter from his first marriage. She and her husband own a lovely home with a spare room including a private bathroom in Arizona. It’s referred to as the Italy room. Remember, back when we sold it all, this also meant our living accommodations too. I feel very close to Melanie, and think of her as my daughter. I may not have given birth to her, but deep love and respect rank first and foremost in our relationship. However, after five months of disrupting their home life, we thought we should figure out other living quarters. No one knew how long this pandemic would cause travel restrictions, and we didn’t wish to become a burden and overstay our welcome. We looked at a few apartments to buy, but prices were substantial, and the selection in our preferred locations turned out to be less than perfect. We searched but couldn’t find anything reasonable that would allow ongoing travel to Italy. Our thought process at the time—to live six months in both countries. In the end, we just couldn’t stretch our limited budget to accommodate this lifestyle.

***

Our daughter Jacklyn and her husband, Andy, purchased a new home in Phoenix in 2019 during our year adventure through Italy. It came with a unique and interesting feature—a feature not currently in use. The west side of their home included a recreational vehicle pad, including full hookups. The previous homeowners already installed the independent sewer and electric connections. This vacant space between them and their neighbors presented an area to conduct bicycle races and play hopscotch. Their invitation was offered and we became neighbors—very close neighbors. The purchase of a motor home became our solution to the pandemic.

It turned out, many benefits presented themselves to this living arrangement. The absolute best perk? The little knocks on our door when our grandchildren fancied a visit. Cooper, nine years old at the time, Gianna, six, and Evrett five, were always a welcome surprise. We loved when a visit would turn into a discovery of what new snacks we bought (with them in mind) the last time we went grocery shopping. Movie night and sleepovers always bloomed into a jubilant adventure. I’m sure every grandparent knows this feeling, this love. In the morning after breakfast, we would return them to their parents. Another of the great benefits of being a grandparent.

***

With the heat of the summer, the convenience of using their beautiful, unusually deep, built-in pool also became a big plus. On a workday, Gary’s routine remained the same. He would come home from working at the PGA Tour Superstore in Glendale and quickly change into his bathing suit, enjoying a quick dip before dinner. Chilled Lambrusco wine became the choice of beverage during the summer kept cold in our Yeti sip-it wine glasses while enjoying the pool. The lids kept the pool water out as well as the inevitable chance of spillage from their three dogs pacing frantically around the perimeter. The most fun of all, certainly occurred when the kids joined us. These three resembled fish after years of swimming lessons.

Occasionally, I would make the announcement, Nana would appreciate her hair not getting wet. It never turned out well.

A pitfall of being a grandparent? Being given the arduous task of telling them it was time to get out of the pool and dry off.

Barbequing on our originally owned grill also became a nice benefit. When we sold it all—Jacklyn and Andy became the recipient of Gary’s six-burner pride and joy. Gary even mastered making risotto and pasta sauce, not just grilled items, so as not to heat our little motorhome.

***

We bought the recreational vehicle to explore the United States while not being able to travel overseas. Boy, did this American adventure distort, pivot, swivel, and swirl into something completely different than we expected. We only left our daughter Jacklyn’s driveway twice. Well, two times for adventures. However, both times we ventured only about 110 miles each trip to go to a campsite still open but with minor restrictions because of the pandemic.

On the first trip, we went to Cottonwood and the second to Sedona. Both are beautiful places in northern Arizona. Both with family and grandchildren. Nevertheless, it was as far as we could go. All the state parks we wanted to finally visit began closing one by one. There went the other reason for buying a motorhome, to explore places in the States we’d never trekked before. Our desire to reconnect with nature came to a screaming halt. Heartbroken, we finally decided to sell our brand-new beauty within the year.

***

Our yearning to return to Italy remained strong. After all, we were now citizens, and our emotions were being pulled toward that country we loved. Besides, we didn’t go through the citizenship process to stay in the States and only dream about Italy. We started looking into the current regulations for travel. We wanted to resume our Italian journey.

Requirements and procedures changed almost daily back in September 2020. A telephone call to the Italian Consulate in Los Angeles confirmed we could travel to Italy because of our citizenship status, but… we would need to follow tons of regulations. Gary combed the Internet, finding only a few flights still functioning and flying into Italy. We allowed ourselves to elevate our hopes, just slightly.

The consulate informed us we should monitor the updates on the Ministry of Health website as amendments to these regulations occurred weekly, sometimes even daily if they involved extensive changes. Considering the facts and keeping them in mind, we rebooked our flights to arrive in Rome on April 1, 2021. We kept our fingers crossed that April Fools’ Day would not forecast any difficulty with our travel plans. Primo aprile, April first would give the pandemic situation six months to improve and hopefully make our return to Italy easier. How naive we continued to be when it came to Italy, and especially this scenario.

***

Originally, we both agreed to return to Arezzo. We love this medieval town in eastern Tuscany but, we found out the apartment where we previously stayed in 2019, was currently occupied by a resident and not available to rent. Searching the Internet, we just couldn’t find anything quite as nice as Marcello’s apartment.

After a conversation over a nice bottle of red wine, we unanimously decided on the town of Lucca in the western part of Tuscany. We would stay in one location for seven months, unlike our last adventure. If travel restrictions opened, it would result in a good home base for more exploring. In all our travels, we've yet to venture into the Piedmont region. Lucca’s location would make traveling to this area very easy. This region is the second largest in Italy and is well-known for its truffles and famous wines. Need I say more?

***

We know everyone has opinions and beliefs about taking the vaccine and we respect this. For us, after some back and forth, we decided to receive the COVID vaccine before we traveled to Italy. It seemed easier to acquire the vaccine in the States as we’d read Europe experienced difficulty securing vaccines, especially Italy.

Unfortunately, at the time, I wasn’t technically eligible to receive the vaccine because I was too young at the time. With the help of Gary’s daughter, Melanie, she secured Gary’s online appointment. Our strategic plan… for me to accompany him to his appointment, and perhaps (with luck) secure the vaccine even though I was under the age of sixty-five, the requirement at that time.

Arriving at State Farm Stadium in Phoenix for Gary’s appointment, we were shocked at the well-organized system developed for accommodating these appointments. Truly astonished a city, our city, could carry out such precision. To us, Phoenix wasn’t at the cutting edge. Arriving at the check-in station, we inquired about the possibility of me receiving the vaccine as well. The two volunteers working at this spot informed us no shows occurred every day, and I would be able to register as a walk-in patient. Able to receive the vaccination shot as well, we both let out a sigh of relief. Securing the shots at the same time would benefit us both. What’s the saying? Misery loves company. That's us. It's kind of weird we do so many things together. Our friends laugh at us, but we are a package deal. I guess we are truly, two peas in a pod.

***

Gary constantly checked the Italian Ministry website for updates. As luck would have it, just days before our flight on March 31, a new health proclamation arose. We had a gut feeling that something would happen because of the Easter holiday. The strategy thus far was to stop travel and large gatherings for this holiday—to regulate the movement of its citizens to prohibit further spread of the virus. Italy devised a color system corresponding to risk scenarios for which specific restrictive measures were foreseen. These color indicators signified the number of cases in a region. When the Ministry of Health made a region red, the number of COVID cases reported stood high and travel was not allowed in or out of the specific region. The colors, orange, yellow, and white, signified varying levels of restrictions that weren't as severe. White represented the lowest cases being reported. This did not derail us and even though it wasn’t needed to enter Italy, we both took the COVID PCR test forty-eight hours before our flight. Once in Italy, we would follow the mandates to take a COVID test shortly after landing.

***

When we arrived at Sky Harbor Airport in Phoenix, we noticed far fewer travelers. Of course, being five o’clock in the morning might have some bearing on this but, the bottom line—the airport remained extremely empty. While waiting at the gate, seats started filling up fast. Were all these people traveling for the Easter holiday? I removed some hand sanitizer from my pocketbook and offered some to Gary. I’m surprised so many people were traveling, especially now. The news reported most, if not all airlines encountered issues filling flights and it remained a big problem. Not that day, seats around the check-in podium were filled, and people stood in every possible open area. Our flight wound up being like a sardine can—packed. At the time, I became a little concerned, to say the least.

***

The highlight of this trip consisted of making our way to the Dallas/Fort Worth International Terminal, our stopover before the final flight into Rome. We were extremely excited for this leg of the journey because Brett, whom we've mentioned several times in our previous book, our daughter Ally's significant other, gifted us the upgrade on this flight to business class. We’d never flown first class or experienced sitting in a business pod before. Our friends shared several stellar stories of life outside of coach with us, increasing my anticipation.

Selfishly, I must admit, I was looking forward to this flight for the opportunity to board the airplane before anyone else. Our tickets—Group One. I looked around the waiting area once in Dallas Fort Worth, and there were only a handful of people milling around the gate. This flight, by no means, would reach maximum capacity—not by a long shot.

A short ten minutes before boarding we heard an announcement. The American Airlines attendant announced all passengers on the flight to Rome must come to the desk. She