My Grand Ole Lifetime: A Memoir

By Allen McNair

This book, “My Grand Ole Lifetime—A Memoir”, spans seven decades of the life and times of Allen F. McNair, autobiographer, poet and visual artist. He has experienced his life to the fullest, from his heartaches, breakdowns, and triumphs. In this book, he tells of his experience being homeless as well his success academically as a graduate of Columbia College Chicago, focusing on the subject of Screenwriting. In his latest attempt at graduate school level, DePaul University in Chicago, IL, he earned further success in Screenwriting.

He relates his most recent artistic journey during the COVID-19 crisis as a member of Project Onward, an organization in support of fellow artists with mental health challenges and disabilities. He has related in this book his success in the promotion and sale of both his artwork and books.

• Language: English
• Publisher: AuthorHouse
• Release date: Sep 18, 2022
• ISBN: 9781665568562

Allen McNair

Allen McNair is an author of a science fiction/fantasy written as an epic poem: “I Dream of A’maresh”. He is also the author of two editions of his poetry anthology, “From Checkered Cloth”. Allen was enrolled in an online course for a master’s of Vedic Science for three years. He was born August 18, 1951, in Highland Park, Michigan. He is a graduate of fine arts from Columbia College—Chicago in 1990. His homeless experience in that year prepared him to devote himself to the creative pursuit of writing about that condition in the genre of poetry. A self-taught artist and poet, Allen is inspired daily by the wonders of life around him, his present and past experiences, and both the inner and outer beauty of all women.

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MY

GRAND

OLE

LIFETIME

A Memoir

Allen McNair

AuthorHouse™

1663 Liberty Drive

Bloomington, IN 47403

www.authorhouse.com

Phone: [phone]

© 2022 Allen McNair. All rights reserved.

No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or

transmitted by any means without the written permission of the author.

Published by AuthorHouse  09/16/2022

ISBN: 978-1-6655-6857-9 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-6655-6855-5 (hc)

ISBN: 978-1-6655-6856-2 (e)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2022915292

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Getty Images are models,

and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

Certain stock imagery © Getty Images.

Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in

this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views

expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the

views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

CONTENTS

Introduction

Chapter 1     My Tumultuous Childhood

Chapter 2     The Distress of My College Years

Chapter 3     A Gentle Technique Brings Mental Relief

Chapter 4     Some Transformations in My Life

Chapter 5     Accidents Happen

Chapter 6     My Experience with Being Homeless and Its Aftermath

Chapter 7     My A’maresh—Helen Morley

Chapter 8     My Use of the Wellness Recovery Action Plan and Other Tools of Support

Chapter 9     The Marquard Center’s Soup Kitchen

Chapter 10   My Friend Daniela Giralt

Chapter 11   My Epic Poem of Science Fiction/Fantasy

Chapter 12   Interlude—The Ravages of My Internet Addiction

Chapter 13   The Further Adventures with My Epic Poem

Chapter 14   Other Experiences in the Creative Arts

Chapter 15   My Epiphany

Chapter 16   My New Creativity Working with Project Onward

Chapter 17   My Art Exhibit at Phyllis’ Musical Inn

Conclusion

INTRODUCTION

As you will see, dear reader, the life that you are about to witness in these pages is an involved and engaging saga of triumphs and setbacks. This author has tried to follow the first of the Four Agreements proposed by Miguel Ruiz, (author of Toltec spiritualist and neoshamanistic texts) in his book of the same name.

The four agreements are:

1.Always be impeccable with your word.

2.Don’t take things personally.

3.Don’t make assumptions.

And

4.Always do your best.

The first agreement has been my biggest and most significant challenge; in my young life -- especially after my family moved from Hyde Park in the city to Niles in the Chicago suburbs and I ended up in a new school -- I was taunted by my peers about my appearance and social awkwardness. My initial reaction was to vociferously dispute this assessment, often leading to some minor physical altercation. Over the years, I have tried to minimize such hostilities, but I still tend to defend myself against criticism, even if it only adds fuel to the fire and drags things out much longer than worth it. Maybe you, dear reader, will notice this and other recurring patterns in this narrative; It is my hope that you will enjoy my story and that you will learn something about yourself from my history.

The editor of this book has said that he finds the narrative particularly fascinating because, among other things, he can’t imagine doing the same kind of thing about his own life. While I don’t pretend to know his personality really well, it is likely that we are different in a number of respects. I am especially open to better understanding myself and expressing myself quite openly and frankly. I do often reveal TMI (too much information) about my strengths and weaknesses to most people. I am not easily embarrassed to provide exactly the kind of information most people would consider the most private. I want to be easily understood by the people I meet. These traits of mine lend themselves to creating the tell-all book you now have in your hands.

I consider my life to be an ongoing therapy session. I am always feeling each person I meet with questions to provide the insights I need to learn more about my and other people’s natural character. Sometimes this makes me vulnerable to unscrupulous people taking advantages of me, leading to unfortunate consequences when I proceed on the basis of people’s words rather than their actual behavior. (For instance, I have lost the trust of banking, lending and other institutions because of revealing my login information to women on the internet professing undying love and devotion to me. This will become apparent later on in my narrative.)

However, you may come to know me better in the course of my story, as it is my hope that you will enjoy it and that you will learn something about yourself from my experiences. You will no doubt enjoy the various exploits that I relate to throughout. I encourage you to feel free to correspond with me and share elements that would be found in your own memoir.

CHAPTER 1

My Tumultuous Childhood

My name is Allen Frank McNair and I would like to tell you my story. Ever since I was five years old, my everlasting desire was to be a writer when I grew up. And more recently I have found that the creative art of illustration has supplemented and reinforced the art of writing for me. A number of people have remarked how fascinating they have found my writing and complimented me on the word-pictures that I create, particularly in my poetry; in the same way, others have complimented me on my use of color in my visual art. I have mainly worked in the medium of marker art, which some have told me is a fragile medium, subject to fading over time in direct sunlight. I hope to overcome this limitation by reproducing my work in prints. I currently keep my originals safely inside a portfolio that holds the 14 X 17 Bristol paper medium that I use. I also like to work with acrylics. On the other hand, because of my limited income, I have been reluctant to use the more expensive oils. Besides, I have been told that oils take so long to dry that it might try my patience. Someday, however, I will investigate the benefits and limitations of oil painting for myself.

Let me first say a little about my family’s origins.

I was born August 18, 1951, in Highland Park, Michigan, the oldest son of Wilbur F. and Sylvia R. McNair. I have a brother, Donald, who is 18 months younger (born December 3, 1952) and a sister, Patricia, who was born January 3, 1959. We three siblings survived the deaths of our father, October 11, 1974, at the young age of 55, of our mother on August 9, 2002 at the ripe old age of 78, and of our brother, Roger (born December 27, 1954), on August 10, 2010, at the tender age of 56.

I am the oldest son of my parents in what was my father’s second marriage. I have two older half-brothers from my father’s first marriage, my dad’s oldest son Paul and his younger brother Wesley.

In 1954, when I was only three years old, my parents moved from Michigan to the Hyde Park neighborhood in the city of Chicago to find new opportunities for employment in the communications field. My Dad found work with the Birch Personnel firm as an employment counselor and rose through its corporate structure to become the president and owner of the firm when he bought out the previous owners. In 1957, when I was six years old, my parents were looking for a better school system than the Chicago Public Schools, so we moved to the then unincorporated Northwestern suburb of Niles, Illinois.

This move was something traumatic for me. I thought that my parents were insensitive to my thoughts of the loss of my friends and the sense of belonging to a familiar community. I would get into fights with the other kids and get sent to the principal’s office. When Mr. Alexander could take the time for me from his usual administrative functions, the principal would have positive conversations with me and soon became a friend of the family. However, I remember that he and my dad had different ideas about how to develop my latent talent for writing. These ideas of how to encourage this skill centered on whether I should have my own typewriter; My dad, who said that I didn’t need one to continue writing, had the last word on this subject -- I was to use the old typewriter that our family already owned. My first stories were about the old Wild West.

In 1959, shortly after the birth of my baby sister, Patty, I began a solitary lifestyle that has been my way ever since. I would go into my room, close the door from unwanted intruders, and spend countless hours of my day in that inner sanctum reading comic books such as Batman, Superman, Wonder Woman, Lois Lane, Supergirl, and Jimmy Olsen. Fueled emotionally by my rough times interacting with my peers, I would often fantasized about what my life might be like if I had such superhero friends.

I originally became enthralled with comic books when I went to a sidewalk sale in 1956, when my family and I still lived in Hyde Park. There, across a broad table, were cast-off comics at very cheap price -- a dozen for $5.00. My brother Don and I had some allowance money and eagerly scooped up these literary treasures.

My favorite comic book storyline was the one of Supergirl losing her memory due to an encounter with red kryptonite and wandering into Jimmy Olsen’s life. She fell in love with Superman’s pal without remembering her secret identity. I felt no less intrigued by this plot line when the book revealed that what happened between Supergirl and Jimmy Olsen was actually an imaginary tale within the DC universe. I could easily put myself in Jimmy’s shoes in my own imagination.

I carried on my love affair with comic books well into my adult years. In the early ‘80s, when I was in my early thirties, I finally gave away or sold all of my accumulated comics that I had let overrun my studio apartment in the Harding apartments on Diversey Parkway in Chicago. I am most certain that my love of comics carried into both the story and the illustrations in my book, I Dream of A’maresh. Indeed, with this book I have tried to create a similar lively world of imagination and fascination. I hope that my creation will inspire others to write original works about intriguing worlds.

In 1962, when I was in junior high school in Niles, I got a role as the character Gremio, the servant of Petruchio, in a planned production of Shakespeare’s The Taming of the Shrew organized by the English teacher at Maine East High School. Unfortunately, the school administration canceled the production before it could be performed, but still, it is the first role as an actor that I remember.

One of my fondest memories of times when our family was closest was in the winter of 1965 -- one wintry night and the subsequent day when I was in high school. What doesn’t surprise me--since my father often used his income for purchases of luxuries at the expense of the usual necessities in life-- is that we hadn’t paid our heating bill for that month. Yet, we couldn’t have been closer and happier. We had this marvelous stone fireplace in our living room and we also had a thick, comfortable old king size mattress planted on the cold wooden flooring of that big old family room. The six of us -- two parents, three sons, and one daughter -- joyously slept together that night before a roaring fire. The next day, we enjoyed a good ole New England