Soothe Your Soul

By Kerrie E Wright

This book may be the beginning of a new lifestyle journey for you. Hello, my name is Kerrie, over the past 10 years I have created a more joyful life for myself. I discovered there is much more to life by becoming interested in my emotional health. I have filled my life up with new habits and beliefs that serve me in a positive way and I have learned to “Soothe my own Soul” rather than believe that someone or something outside of me will do this.

10 years ago I considered I had a normal life, everything was ok, my kids were healthy, I had a decent job, I enjoyed life most of the time, at that time I didn’t realise that there was so much more to life. In this book I will take you on a journey of self discovery, I will share many stories of my life and what those stories mean to me. I will introduce you to some incredible self help techniques and teach you how to use them to create a life filled with love, peace, joy and gratitude.

As I discovered more about myself and my life kept getting better, I wanted to share with others how they could also discover a new life for themselves. I am now trained in many modalities, I have a Diploma in Holistic Counselling, specialising in Neuro-Linguistic Programming, Life and Health Coaching using hypnotherapy, timeline therapy and many more techniques. I love helping people realise that they can too change their life for the better, the look on peoples faces is priceless when they discover they have the ability to create the life they desire.

This is your invitation to join me on this amazing physical and emotional journey called life.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Balboa Press AU
• Release date: Aug 11, 2022
• ISBN: 9781982295493

Book preview

Copyright © 2022 Kerrie E Wright.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the author except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

Balboa Press

A Division of Hay House

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Bloomington, IN 47403

www.balboapress.com.au

AU TFN: 1 800 844 925 (Toll Free inside Australia)

AU Local: [phone] ([phone] from outside Australia)

Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

The author of this book does not dispense medical advice or prescribe the use of any technique as a form of treatment for physical, emotional, or medical problems without the advice of a physician, either directly or indirectly. The intent of the author is only to offer information of a general nature to help you in your quest for emotional and spiritual well-being. In the event you use any of the information in this book for yourself, which is your constitutional right, the author and the publisher assume no responsibility for your actions.

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Getty Images are

models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

Certain stock imagery © Getty Images.

ISBN: 978-1-9822-9548-6 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-9822-9549-3 (e)

Balboa Press rev. date: 10/19/2022

Contents

Introduction

1 Calm your Monkey Mind

The basis of the ego is fear:

The monkey mind always wants something

How to keep that monkey quiet

Meditation: Your quiet, monkey free place

I go to a quiet place

ACTIVITY: Meditation practice. Calm your monkey mind

The benefits of Meditation

2 Free Your Beliefs

Blocks

Comfortable is great, but is there more?

ACTIVITY: A limitless life

You have to learn to believe in yourself:

Advice from loved ones

Take Responsibility

What stories are you telling yourself?

The Exit Strategy

SOLUTION: Learn to see the blocks and identify your limited beliefs

How to find the belief systems that are not serving you in a positive way

ACTIVITY: Find Your Empowering Beliefs

3 Peaceful Vibes

You get back the vibrations you put out

Survival brain (fight or flight) vs creative brain

What can you notice physically when you go into fight and flight?

What things change your vibe?

What we put out is what we get back

How do good vibes work?

What energy are you giving off?

I choose to believe that I can be happy

ACTIVITY: Creating Positive Vibes

ACTIVITY: Create a peaceful vibe to soothe your soul

4 Live by your Values

5 The Power of Acceptance

Accept yourself and others

I create vs I am in effect

ACTIVITY: Acceptance now and later

6 Calming Filters

What you will get if you change the meaning

How do you see, hear or feel about situations?

ACTIVITY: Your Role Models Change your Filters

7 Gentle Acceptance of Self

The heart of your relationships is you

What about your relationship with money?

ACTIVITY: Practice positive self-talk with a reminder band

8 Soothe Your Relationships

Change your relationships with others

Have you heard of unconditional love?

Are you in a toxic relationship? This could be a relationship with a partner, family members or friendships.

We are all influencers

ACTIVITY: The empty chair technique

9 Drifting In & Out Of Awareness

Finally, I see the signals

Unconscious mind

Conscious mind

Do you feel like when you are in a bad mood things don’t go well for you?

Why do we make the decisions that we do?

Life is communication

Focus on things that are easy to focus on to heal your wounds

ACTIVITY: Colour Meditation

10 Embrace A Clean Slate

Setting up my day from the beginning

ACTIVITY: Set up your day

Be Grateful

11 Fill Your Life With Things You Love

ACTIVITY: Clear the mind and find calm

12 Love Is The Greatest Force

ACTIVITY: Journaling and Art Therapy

Conclusion

Introduction

What pains you in this life, do you feel like there are lots of good things happening but there is a part of you that wants more?

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You know you are ready if:

• Deep inside you know there is more to life but you just can’t put your finger on it

• You feel like someone in your life has let you down and want to get back on track

• Part of you believes that the world is a dangerous and horrible place where there is war, crime, drugs, unfaithful partners, but another part believes there is good in the world

• Something has happened in your past and you are caught in a loop where you are reliving it every day

• You feel like you will never be enough, but want to be worthy

• There are patterns of relationship breakdowns and you are determined to move on to something better

• You feel like you can’t get anywhere because people don’t believe in you, but you really want to break out and be authentic and go for your dreams

• You think, Life isn’t fair, why does this always happen to me? And want to see a change in your results

• There is a part of you that wants more out of life

• You are turning to unhealthy lifestyles to feel better and try to change but nothing works

You might feel stagnant and it just doesn’t seem like there is any more to life. Maybe other people in your life clarify and reinforce this by believing the same as you.

We need people around us for inspiration, connection and security. So how do we surround ourselves with the companionship we need, without getting drawn into bad energy and negative vibes that come with it?

The answer is to make a connection with you. You are the most important person in your life and you are with yourself each and every day. When we heal our self-connection and learn how to look internally (not externally) for strength, praise, happiness and soothing, we get out of those negative cycles of connecting to toxic people and get on our path to our true purpose.

There may have been things happening in your life in the past that have caused you to believe that bad things always happen and you need to keep yourself safe, and by keeping yourself safe you are blocked from doing things you want, because you might get hurt again.

Maybe you feel that you can’t take chances because you might fail, then the effort and hope you put in was all for nothing.

Everyone told you this would happen, you should listen to them and stay within the boundaries others have set to stay safe, and avoid the shame and humiliation of getting the I told you so lecture.

The problem is, there are so many rules and different boundaries to follow, which ones are correct or whose toes you might step on if you choose different roads to take?

It’s time to stop listening to what everyone else believes and come back to you.

You have the answers. Even if it’s been a long time since you last trusted yourself, it still exists inside you.

I’m Kerrie and I am a Holistic Counsellor who specialises in Neuro-Linguistic Programming tools and self-help techniques. I show people how to open effective communication internally and get back to knowing yourself and getting what you want out of life (not what other people expect you to have in life).

In my many years of life coaching, I have assisted people who want guidance to learn to create the life they want. They can improve their:

• Emotional health

• Physical health

• Relationships

• Finances

• Career

• Spirituality

To find

• Success

• Happiness

• Joy

• Peace

• Love

• Gratitude

• Calm

• and self-soothing

You have the ability to expand any area of interest to you. The reason why I chose to endeavour on this career path is because I was feeling out of balance in my life and wanted to create a fulfilling and joyful life for myself. There were a lot of amazing things happening. I knew there had to be more but I didn’t know what or how I would improve. Using these techniques in this book my life literally changed overnight, I found the key to changing all of the things I wanted to and learned it was all internal and not something I could find externally.

I have learned to communicate with myself and others more effectively in an accepting manner. Now it’s your turn.

I have grown immensely due to circumstances in my life that were out of my control. I found myself anxious a lot of the time. When I was 39-years-old, my husband took his own life. I was left suddenly on my own with my kids. The shock and unexpected event had me scared and worried about the future. I was unsure of how to look after the family and house by myself. It felt like the whole world knew my business and that I was being judged. This was a big learning curve for me, even though I didn’t know it at the time.

I found a new partner and we made a new life together. We went on lots of fun holidays, living life to the fullest and then we found out he was terminally ill and he had passed away at the age of 47. We were together for five years and again I felt alone to deal with the world. At this stage it was easy to go into the ‘always me mentality’. When things were happening in my life that were unwanted, I ended up believing that I was the only one being punished, everyone else had an easy, happy life and my life wasn’t easy or happy, this is what I had been given to deal with. Many emotions were big and they were overwhelming at times.

Again I found a new partner who was already progressing with his own personal development and he introduced me to empowering information that I had never heard before. He was living outside of the box of how most of the population of the world seemed to be. We went to personal development seminars that had me intrigued and looking for more of this information and we then undertook many training sessions and courses. I have learnt to help myself and be a positive influence on others to improve their lives too.

Most of us do not understand that we have the internal resources to self-soothe and calm ourselves. Instead, we turn to external resources to find relief from our pain or personal imbalance there.

Some examples of looking externally for soothing your soul could be:

• Overeating

• Eating disorders

• Relying on alcohol to create fun

• Going from one bad relationship to another

• Excessive exercise and dieting

This book will help you learn to leave negative and harmful habits behind and find genuine self-soothing techniques.

The techniques we have are very transportable and you can practice them yourself any time of the day, anywhere you are so you can access self-soothing techniques when you need them.

You are an important person. Have you been treating yourself like you are worthy and valuable?

It’s very peaceful to know that you have reached this level of actualisation, or the moment in your life where you’ve lost the thoughts about not being good enough or smart enough because you are feeling peaceful and content.

It’s very authentic when you are learning about what’s right for you and your path. Moving towards this is what will bring your happiness, joy, peace and satisfaction and allow you to create your own life, the way you want and the way you want to live.

You may feel like you don’t know how you will ever heal from your emotional scars because of past experience but I can tell you, no matter where you have been, you have the ability to change your old thoughts, awareness, and direction.

In the chapters of this book, I explain and demonstrate how to use useful tools to help soothe yourself into a better frame of mind, be more aware of how you deal with your emotions and situations that can rise up suddenly, acknowledge this and turn it around gently and learn how to accept yourself just as you are, and embrace new, positive strategies. I feel like if we can soothe ourselves into a calm, peaceful state, we can be more flexible with life and move forwards to a new exciting lifestyle and loving life more than ever before.

You are in charge of your thoughts. Your beliefs and your thoughts are yours alone.

You have the ability and power within to turn things around or to expand your life in a positive way in all areas of life.

This book is about teaching people to soothe their own soul and look internally for comfort and direction rather than relying on external factors.

How do you achieve that?

Self-awareness and learning to be aware of your internal values and creating more balance in your life, and knowing when you are out of alignment with who you are meant to be.

Filling your life up with positives: Love, Peace, Joy, Gratitude, uses the creative part of the mind and allows us to live in freedom and soothe any hurt or situation that arises.

It’s difficult to do because most people are living in pain states: anger, sadness, hurt fear and guilt, which are good for when we need to take action to survive, but our lives are not in danger very often, yet most people are tuned into anxiety and stress, waiting for something bad to happen or reliving past hurts and conflicts long after they have passed.

In my book I have included activities to help you get started easily and simply in the comfort of your home.

You can heal from your unwanted emotions, just like a physical injury that completely heals, you can heal too. You don’t want to put a band-aid on it to temporarily fix it, you want a total healing process that will have you dealing with things that come up in the future as well as changing the meaning of what has happened in the past.

Accept that it is important for you to feel all of the feelings that come up for you and let your mind rest and be at ease instead of beating yourself up emotionally by guilt, or self-anger about how you think you should have dealt with things better.

We are all doing the best that we can with what we know at any given time. By learning new techniques and being interested in moving forwards we can deal with things a little bit better each time, like learning to read when we were children, we did it over and over until we knew how to do it well, it is the same as personal development, we practice new techniques over and over until we know how to do it well.

We cannot just practice it for a while, we need to become committed to permanently creating a higher quality of life for ourselves or we will continually revert back to old ways. Sometimes we will do this several times before we learn the lesson and this is okay, it is a learning process that continues throughout our lives.

I specialise in improving the following areas:

• Self-soothing techniques

• Finding your self-worth

• Becoming your own coach for a happy life

• Finding your authentic and true self

• Self-healing in both mind and body

• Creating your best life

• Creating a sense of self-empowerment

• Focusing on what you want and not what others want for you

• Getting clear on what you value and what is most important to you as an individual

• Finding your track in life

• Learning about patterns and behaviours you currently run and unblock them so you can move in the direction you would prefer

• Learning how magical the world really is

• Living a life full of love, peace, joy and gratitude

• Acceptance of self and others

• Self-awareness

If you could achieve this and more you are bound to be living a higher quality life where you have purpose and fulfilment.

This is important because you will also be demonstrating a self-soothing lifestyle to family members, your children, friends and work colleagues (just by being you) and they might start to think life is a wonderful experience too. All you will be doing is focussing on your success and it will flow onto others in ways you never thought possible.

Throughout this book you will learn strategies to help you discover more about yourself, your purpose or your why.

This book is flexible and is tailored for you to create what you believe and want, it is not a set of rules saying you have to do this or that to get results, it is paramount that you align it with what makes you emotionally happy and enriched in your individual life.

This book is also a fantastic tool to be used in conjunction with professional emotional health care e.g. if you are seeing a psychologist, psychiatrist or general practitioner. If you feel deeply depressed or anxious it is recommended you see a healthcare professional. I have received referrals from healthcare professionals supporting my work with their patients and they have gotten great results in their personal life.

1

Calm your Monkey Mind

Have you ever felt like you’ve had so much going on in your life that your mind will not stop continuously thinking? It’s all in a muddle, you become overwhelmed and the main focus is on all the stuff. This is what we call the Monkey Mind, it is like a monkey continuously jumping from branch to branch over and over just like they look like in the jungle.

This monkey is responsible for you making decisions that keep you stuck and not moving forward in life. It keeps you believing you cannot achieve the things you are passionate about, it stops you right in your tracks from making positive life changing decisions. It limits the value of your life. You want more and deep down you know it but will not pursue it because of the monkey that keeps going around in