Facing My Own Music: The Spiritual Journey of a Singer

By Melanie Padron Golding

Singer-songwriter & Counsellor Mel Golding, has written her music journey memoirs through an analytical lens. Mel offers insights into her story as a young artist and how she became a qualified counsellor later in life. Her life as an adolescent

• Language: English
• Publisher: Meltopia
• Release date: May 25, 2022
• ISBN: 9781800689206

Book preview

Facing My Own Music

Facing My Own Music

Facing My Own Music

The Spiritual Journey of a Singer

Melanie Padron Golding

publisher logo

Meltopia

Contents

Dedication

1 A Family in Arts

2 True Blue

3 The Beginning of Conformity

4 Singing for Love and Approval

5 Adolescent Identity

6 Producers & Managers

7 Offstage Adversities

8 Musical Etiquette

9 Mike Myers

10 Three Succeeding Projects

11 Spiritual Reflections

12 Rime to M.E.L

13 Rock Chick to Rock Solid

14 Marriage and Divorce

15 The Nova Luna Project

16 A Musician's Mental Health

17 Taking Back My Life

Photo

Suzy & Percy

Me and Mum

Photo Gallery

About the Author

***

Dedicated to my beautiful and most precious little gem, my best friend and gorgeous little angel whom I was blessed to bring into this world….

My daughter

Olivina Celeste

You are the light of my life!

Love from Mummy xxx

***

Copyright © 2022 by Melanie Padron Golding

Meltopia Ltd., Unit 82A, James Carter Road, Mildenhall, Bury St. Edmunds, Suffolk, IP28 7DE Phone: [phone]

www.meltopia.co

www.mel-golding.com

Email: [e-mail]

Printed by IngramSpark

All Rights Reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced by any mechanical, photographic, or electronic means, or in the form of a phonographic recording; including information storage and retrieval systems, without permission in writing from the publisher, except by a reviewer who may quote brief passages in a review.

The events and conversations in this book have been set down to the best of the author's ability, although some names and details have been changed to protect the privacy of individuals.

Facing My Own Music: The Spiritual Journey of a Singer/Melanie P. Golding

First printing April 2022

Paperback ISBN - 978-1-80068-919-0

Cover design by Meltopia Ltd.

Cover design contribution: Ramona Kaulitzki/Shutterstock.com

Introduction

It is my pleasure to finally release this book which has been with me for the past twelve years. Life has certainly been hectic ,  but I finally found the moment to finish this part of my life. As time moves on, the memories are becoming more and more distant, so it was time to put everything down on paper before losing the nuts and bolts to the story of my life in music. Here I share events and incidents on my journey in music, some happy, some funny and some fused with tragedy.

I felt it necessary to illustrate the adversities faced as a musician whilst in the making and that despite the difficulties, you can turn your life around. This book talks about my music endeavours from a platform of multiple adversities. Through self-reflection, the narrative of my story embodies a broad analysis of the self, alongside some cognitive aspects underpinning the pilgrim of what it entails to be an artist. Changing thoughts and seeing things in multiple realities, I shine the light on my own journey in music from the very beginning to where I am today.  Life has presented many battles and dark hidden secrets.

The traumas and tragedies all make a lurking undertone to my career goals and aspirations. Falling in and out of love along the way, losing family, and gaining solitude add to the storyline, making it an experience unique to me and hopefully a valid contribution to you.

As I fought my way through life, I slowly entered into a world of mental health issues, something unfamiliar to me at the time, a terrain of the unknown with absolutely no prior knowledge. My resilience pulled me through and made me the person I am today. My understanding of mental health became a passion that led to a counselling profession. I continue on that path as I follow my work and research within the realms of mental health, and emotional and spiritual well-being neatly bunched together as a bouquet of resilience. Leading to my life's purpose today, I hope this book can inspire, and highlight the element of surviving the industry, particularly for young people who are so vulnerable and in need of guidance.

On the morning of 4th March 2008, it dawned on me that I should actually write a book and who knows, maybe that would lead somewhere. It may ironically be the key to a successful outcome. Going through a pessimistic phase, I initially called it I'll believe it when I see it. This book began its journey by writing about the musical part of my life story. It has been the most significant part of my life yet the most disappointing in its results. It baffled me as to why I was still trying to launch my career as a singer after some twenty-odd years of suffering the ordeal of the industry. I experienced many so-called knockdowns and rejections from the music industry and felt the sorrow of never being the singer that Artist and Repertoire (A&R) were seeking to sign. I believe my music was presented at the wrong time hence the saying, timing is everything. Now that it's 2022, I am still baffled as to what keeps me going in this 'pain meets pleasure' industry and why. Either I'm solid and determined with a deep sense of self-belief or simply hopeful with dreaming at the foundation. 

My love for music and the ability to convey feelings through singing got me through some of the most challenging times. I had built an inner resilience and found confidence through my skills that made 'inner pillars of strength' that held me together for the rest of my life. I write from the heart about my journey in music, which began in Tenerife of the Canary Islands. A voyage of discovery took me to London, Ireland, Germany, and America from this island. Rest assured, the tour hasn't ended yet! It's a constant and evolving journey, leading to who knows where. My life has been one turbulent and emotional rollercoaster from many angles. I wanted to share my experiences with anyone wishing to enter into the world of music as it is a personal and professional pilgrimage that affects you forever. Your unique style of development will depend upon the road you take as experiences shape you. 

This book will be handy for the novice going into the professional world of music. My personal story conveys the difficulties of environmental and surrounding factors that directly impacted me personally and, subsequently, my life's direction. I start with addressing my childhood and adolescence, followed by my time as a mature adult with parenting responsibilities. My journey conveys the emotional and practical difficulties surrounding an artist at a time of youth and development. I openly display the psychological and emotional hurdles I endured and the ability to overcome them. To thrive in such an industry when going through trauma, abuse, relationships, or conflicts takes enormous strength and infinite resilience. 

A poor start in life will take extra effort in the 'emotional, mental and spiritual' department when taking on a career with high aspirations. Essentially, you are overcoming multiple hurdles without even looking at the challenges presented in a music career. I would emphasise this book is relevant to every aspiring musician, regardless of your status. There are many emotional challenges along the way for young musicians who aspire to become the next big thing. Whether you are the parent of a talented child or the talent yourself, if you want to get into the world of showbiz, I can share some insights through my story to help inform you and certainly entertain you. I believe there's nothing more daunting than entering into a situation you have very little knowledge of, so I'd like to bridge that fear with some support to eliminate or reduce that fear factor.

There are many red flags to look out for when embarking on the music industry. Meeting industry executives can be a heavy task when it comes to choosing and believing. People who manage the business side of music, such as managers, producers, lawyers, and publishers, can speak in jargon that will have you confused for weeks. Some true professionals will help you within the field, but be aware there are more 'talkers' than 'doers'. Once you are more informed, you will feel more equipped and prepared to enter the new realm with a little more armour. 

Whether you are beginning your journey or at the top of your game, I believe there are risk factors involved in the process. It is essential to think about mental health and wellbeing when walking the road to stardom. Self-expectations and the expectations of others can take over your life. Believe me when I tell you that what not to do is just as important as what you should do.  There is never any fixed road to success, but I believe perseverance and self-care are vital aspects likely to get you there safely.

For many years, the music industry overlooked the emotional protection of artists.

My experiences as a young artist led me to my passion for safeguarding emotions and providing healing. I feel self-care is central to the role of an artist. There are so many facets to consider for succeeding in music, plus your definition of success may differ from someone else's. The fundamental ingredients for success need to be in place for favourable results but even then, there is never any guarantee of anything. 

Today, I still write and produce my music, but I now work from a very different perspective. I am my own boss, and I make music for the pure love of it. I see my artistic expression as a part of me for the freedom to express my thoughts and feelings in writing. Recognition and closure are merriment, but more importantly, my idea of success is inner peace and happiness from within.  

I am now mature!

A Note from the Author

Once upon a time, there was a young vibrant singer with great prospects. She embodied a youthful excitement with the idea of embarking on a voyage of glamorous show business. Compared to the likes of Whitney Houston and Celine Dion, industry executives such as Mike Myers, Phil Ramone, Muff Winwood, and Sony UK took great interest in this girl. The future looked bright, successful, and full of prosperity.

That girl was me.

Part 1

In the Beginning

The origins of a person begin with the roots,

The very starting point of your journey in life

- Mel Golding

1

A Family in Arts

Mixed Heritage

Family Pic – I’m the baby in my nan’s arms

Iwas born in Loughborough, Leicestershire ,  on December 8th, 1973. For the first two years of my life, my parents and I were a family of three living in Coventry until the new arrival of baby sister Noelia made her appearance on February 3rd, 1976.

The British Side

As I introduce my family, I begin with my mother— an English woman born in Meriden to British parents, Eileen Doreen Fisher and Denis Ernest Golding. According to Mum, she had a wonderful upbringing, the perfect family as she recalls. Her dad worked as an engineer and eventually became a works manager for a small manufacturing company, making parts for aeroplanes. Denis, born in France to British parents, was not only of high intelligence but also had a flair for the arts. Awe-inspiring in quality, his drawings and paintings were of a professional standard. Further adding to the talent, my grandfather was blessed with a wonderful singing voice. Strong in vocals and enchanting on stage, he and my nan were quite the intriguing pair. In a traditional Gene Kelly and Judy Garland old-fashioned way, these soulmates spent many good times together at the piano singing all of their favourite tunes as my nan accompanied my grandfather on the piano. Five years following the birth of my mother, auntie Penny arrived. As a young family, they were truly happy. Music and art were at the core of their lives, bringing them together in strong unity and love. My mum took after her father with his artistic tendencies, playing a big part in her career later.

Sadly, I never knew my grandfather Denis, as the angels took him from this earth plane way too early: ‘robbed’ as my mother says. He sadly passed away at the age of only forty-four years. This tragedy left my mother truly devastated at the tender age of seventeen. Penny, who was only twelve years old at the time, was equally affected by the tragic loss, losing the gift of a perfect role model of a father.

My nan was more than competent in the upbringing of the girls, but there is nothing like the replacement of a great father figure, an exemplary role model. My mum and aunt were left feeling vulnerable without the loving father in their lives to guide, protect and support them.

Denis was described as a wonderful father, a great man, and a loyal and devoted husband. As my mum and aunt talk about their loss, they express the memory as being one that turned their world upside down, and everything from that point in their lives changed forever. The loss of their father had significantly impacted the course of their destiny as life took another turn.

My Nan

Eileen Golding was a strong, powerful, and independent woman who had everybody's respect. She was, as she said, 'a no-nonsense woman' who would happily give you a piece of her tongue pie if you crossed her! As a child, she reminded me of Margaret Thatcher! A strong iron lady.

Being a widowed parent would have been challenging in multiple ways. Dealing with practicalities and bringing up two daughters alone had adverse effects on the girls. My mum was close to her father. She felt it easy to approach her father with any subject. The impacts of his absence affected the very centre of her being. Growing up and maturing without a father were my mother's core challenges experienced with a sense of vulnerability. My nan Eileen was a great provider, but her survival as a widowed woman had depended on her character traits. Becoming a strong person was her priority, and for her, being strong was linked with putting on a brave face. Nan's strong character merged with domineering traits but growing up with an authoritative figure for the young girls added to the challenge. The most prominent and positive aspect that I remember about my nan, was her great sense of humour. She was quite the performer when at the piano and holding a microphone. I can recall her up on stage at my gigs in Tenerife, kicking her legs up as high as she could as she sang New York, New York by Frank Sinatra. A solid heart of gold and a great person, she was a woman made of steel. Or was she?  

As I introduce Nan, I can remember her through my eyes as a child, but I now look back through a lens as a woman. The child, Melanie, knew her based on limited information and no knowledge of her past experiences, nor the building blocks of who she was. Based in Coventry, Nan was a secretary by day and local club pianist by night. Of Irish descent, she had a strict mother and father, and this tough love impacted her survival skills and motivation. We usually learn how to survive from our parents and eventually become the by-products of their experiences. My grandfather Denis was the very core of her heart and soul. According to my mother, he kept her in check and on the straight-and-narrow. She was quite the free spirit with elements of rebelliousness in her behaviours. Denis was her pillar of strength; through love and kindness, they were pure and solid. I believe I got my vocal abilities from my grandfather. He was described as an exceptional singer with an operatic tone to his voice. Following my grandfather's devastating passing, Nan was in search of a new beginning. She took the girls on holidays to Italy, France, and eventually Tenerife, where my mum met my father. 

My grandparents are my role models. These special people are the ones from whom I draw my strength. I think of them when I need to access that part of me for my identity and sense of resilience. I think of my nan who carried on smiling and performing to people, even with a broken heart. Already earning a living as a secretary, this phase ended when her perfect marriage tragically ended. Still a young woman, Eileen had her whole life ahead of her. Her strength and resilience eventually manifested in starting a new life at the age of forty hence her career in music began later in life. 

To auntie Penny's credit, she had found an advert in the local Coventry papers seeking an entertainer and pianist in Bermuda. Penny sent in a resumé along with a picture of Nan with a monkey on her shoulder! To everyone's astonishment, she got the job! When thinking of beginnings and endings, one of the lessons to remember is, where there is an ending, there is usually a beginning. For Nan, it was an opportunity that flew her out to Bermuda to perform at the King Henry the VIII pub. Meanwhile, she had left her two daughters back in the UK. My mum was twenty-one, and Penny was only sixteen. Feelings of abandonment naturally emerged from their mother's absence, but they carried on. My mother had just got married and began a career in the arts as she travelled through her degree in Fine Arts. Eventually, she was expecting her first child, me.

Nan was singing and entertaining the local Bermudians and American tourists who visited this exotic island. A three-month contract extended to fifteen years! Thriving in her field and full of passion, meeting people, and living life to the full, she became the renowned British entertainer called Goldie. Goldie entertained her audiences nearly every evening at the pub King Henry VIII and eventually The Reefs hotel. The worst days of her bereaved life transformed into some of the best experiences as she played the piano and entertained. Goldie delivered tunes of the '40s and '50s and played many requests. This role landed her financial abundance as she gratefully accepted generous tips via her famous Dollar in the Glass. 

Nan was quite a strong character, and it does appear that characteristics and innate traits play a profound part in the outlook of life. Her resilience and determination to rise above personal tragedy inspired me when faced with my own challenges. It is how you choose to respond to some challenges that will influence your life's direction. 

My Mum

My mum is a talented artist. Her drawings and paintings are a breath-taking experience. She embarked on a degree in fine arts and was a typical art student: free-spirited, someone who went with the flow and was free of issues and emotional baggage. Achieving her degree, she eventually got her chance at the age of twenty-six to become an art teacher at Cardinal Wiseman Girls School, a secondary school in Potters Green, Coventry. I eventually went to this school and even had her as my teacher! She should be proud of her achievements, she was the carer, the mother and solid provider to her