Leo's Hands

By Andrea Lepri

Leo is a police dog, a mongrel with a passion for Looney Tunes. He always wanted to have hands in order to manage the remote control of the TV and the refrigerator, but when his boss Steve is killed in an ambush, his desire becomes a real thing because his hands are the only means that will allow him to unveil the killer and obtain justice. From then on he will be involved in a spiral of adventures during which he will ”borrow” the hands of other characters met along a tortuous journey that will bring him from time to time closer to the killer, to the finale ”face to face”.

Leo is an atypical police dog, a mongrel with a passion for cartoons. Since he was a puppy, he always wished having hands; he believes that these will make his life easier and more enjoyable. His life flows smoothly until his partner Steve, an agent of the Task Force, is killed in an ambush by a corrupt colleague in an abandoned shed. During the ambush, the recorder Steve had brought to unveil the killer falls into a crack in the floor. Leo knows that that object is very important, but he is unable to retrieve it because he has no hands. During Steve's funeral, Leo recognizes the killer and attacks him to kill him. The Commander of the Police Headquarters believes the dog is mad with anger and sorrow, so he sends it to the veterinarian so that he can put him down. The veterinarian, however, instead of doing his duty, sells him to a laboratory where are doing animal experimentations. There, Leo befriends with Giotto, a chimpanzee who loves to paint and knows how to gesture. The two are aware that at the end of the experiments, the laboratory director will ”get rid” of all the tests. So they design and implement the escape. Leo now has the hands of his new friend to retrieve the recorder, though to win his reticence he has to tell him a little lie. After the daring escape, a good dinner and a little ”binge” during which they trust each other, the two go to the crime scene. Soon after they enter the courtyard, however, the killer also comes in the company of an accomplice: they are also looking for the recorder.
The killer wounds Leo and retrieves the precious object, Giotto scares frightened. Leo manages to escape and is picked up by Italo, a lousy private investigator; while escaping by car the killer sees them and writes down the license plate number. Italo takes care of Leo, who during the convalescence attempts to blossom the love between him and Stefania, his next door neighbor, and to befriends with Barbie, her dog. Barbie first ignores him, but when Leo saves her from a Dobermann, she falls in love. Meanwhile, Leo has also to deal with Puffi, a very cunning and mischievous Persian cat. Just in the middle of a romantic dinner, a phone call makes Italo go away for a job interview and Leo goes with him. But in reality this is a trap organized by the assassin, who has messed with Italo's car brakes. The two go off a cliff and Leo wakes up at the hospital, where he finds out that his body is dead and that, who knows how, he's in the body of Italo, who has disappeared. This new situation frightens him, but after he has recovered, he immediately finds the positive side: now that he is a man, he can finally give a good lesson to Puffi, and especially he can try to unveil his enemy. But being men is not easy and Leo encounters several issues, such as the relationship with Stefania, who now finds him strange, and that with Barbie, who has recognized him and accuses him of treason. He also has to learn how to talk and wash, dress and go shopping, get money and do all that other men do. Resigned to stay forever in that situation, Leo is pondering on what to do when suddenly the ghost of Italo appears claiming his body. Leo tells him how things are and tells him about the corrupt policeman, the ambush to Steve and all the rest. Italo tells Leo that for a mistake he has ended up in the paradise of dogs in his place and describes it, invoking him so to restore

• Language: English
• Publisher: Tektime
• Release date: Feb 10, 2018
• ISBN: 9788873049937

Book preview

Chapter 1

Leo watches the TV

It was pitch black outside, the bells of the church rang for a long time and the nice smell of something to eat came from under the entrance door. The neighbours had just started to fight and break the plates like every night, that was the clear signal that the Looney Tunes were about to start! I ran to the couch to get comfortable hoping that they would show Puddy Tat, my favourite, then I randomly started to push the remote buttons in the problematic attempt to adjust the volume. While I asked myself for the umpteenth time why remotes and the relative buttons are made so small Steve came in, right after the same scene that happened every rainy night repeated itself punctually. The wet soles of his shoes slipped on the parquet, he lost his step and tripped on the carpet colliding right against the china cabinet placed in a corner of the entrance, now lacking of ornaments for a while. The latter started to stumble and Steve engaged a sort of Greek-Roman fight to keep it steady. My friend Steve was a Police Inspector and he was a really good policeman, the best I had ever worked with (the only one to be honest!). However, as insightful and precise, determined and careful as he was at work, in his private life he was a complete mess. He was messy and distracted, he was also shy and insecure, it probably was because of this that at the age of thirty-seven years old he couldn’t build a serious and lasting relationship with one of his peers.

After recovering from his collision with the china cabinet, Steve cursed a few times rubbing his knee hard and hitting his foot on the ground because of the pain and the rage, then he threw the ratty and soaking raincoat on the coat rack keeping murmuring a few bad words. In the end, like every night, he let himself fall in the armchair with his arms dangling over the armrests and his head fallen back. He closed his eyes for a few moments, apparently looking for a moment of peace. He changed his mind. He opened his eyes again and glanced at me serious, he got up and came to take the remote from me, not caring about me glaring at him, then he threw himself on the armchair again. He turned down the volume that after a lot of work I had just managed to adjust and started talking.

Aware of what was waiting for me I sighed defeated telling myself that I was a victim of a proper injustice: one works from morning until night, poorly paid and poorly appreciated, often even ridden roughshod over and without any sure perspective for the future and for the retirement. At the end of the day you sit yourself calmly on the couch without too many demands and without disturbing anyone, just hoping to be able to watch a cartoon peacefully... but no! You’re forced to listen to our work mate’s talking, who has the damned habit of never stopping talking. To be honest he didn’t behave in that way very often, but when he did I seriously hated him, especially if right in that moment the Looney Tunes were on TV.

«I’m sorry for leaving you alone, but I was busy. Soon we’ll have to go hear a bird sing» he said while his gaze lit up, and I’ve never understood why he really liked expressing himself that way, like the character of a fourth category thriller movie. In spite of myself I turned my head a little, trying not to lose my sight on the television, and I glanced at him acting interested.

«That’s right, we’re close» he added excited after nodding for a long time in the attempt of lifting my curiosity to the guard level.

I kept looking at him without blinking, absentmindedly, but just for an instant. Right after my eyes, irresistibly attracted, turned to land on the screen again. Puddy Tat just leaned himself from the drainpipe, he did it that little too much that was enough to make him fall from the roof of a twenty-six story skyscraper.

Chapter 2

The disappointing affair

«Hey, I’m talking to you» my mate grabbed my attention again, I looked back at him starting to feel really irritated. If I couldn’t have the sound, I wanted at least to enjoy with my eyes the ruinous fall of the old fleabag. When the latter got up dizzy, with his eyes veined red and the birds flying around his head, only to crumble in thousand pieces later, I was hysterical.

«I got a new contact,» Steve insisted with his eyes shining with satisfaction, «soon we’ll have an appointment with a confidant. He’ll give concrete proofs, so that we’ll finally manage to stop extra money from flowing in the police district. We’ll send home so many corrupted agents that they’ll have to do a new contest, otherwise there won’t be enough policemen in the town anymore.. hey, are you listening to me or not?»

I puffed even more upset and I landed definitely my gaze on him, now the ending credits of the cartoon were rolling. I stretched and prepared myself mentally, I lifted my pointy ears to listen to him and decided that at the end of his story I would’ve taken a good nap. But my mate, now offended by my behaviour, left me be. He stretched an arm back and pressed a button of the voicemail placed on the a cabinet at his back, inserting the loud speaker.

Steve, honey, when are you coming to visit your mum? It’s been weeks that I haven’t heard from you. Warn me the day before, so that I’ll make you parmesan eggplant, that you like so much... ah, I bought you three pairs of underwear, the really comfortable ones... and then remember...

My friend shook his head and pressed another button.

Hello champion, it’s Paolo. So, are you still alive? Remember that tomorrow night we have the rematch of the bocce ball tournament. And this time come concentrated, after the embarrassment of the other time we have to over-win. This time we have to humiliate them all, or all the District will make fun of us until retirement.

Steve pressed the button another few times to make the tape scroll faster, ignoring the messages he didn’t care about. Suddenly a voice of a woman was heard.

It’s me, Mara it said in a soothing tone I wanted to thank you for the flowers. It was really kind of you to remember my birthday. I really liked them, seriously, however I take the opportunity to point out one thing: in the last three months, on several occasions, you delivered an entire greenhouse to my house. You dedicated me sixteen songs at the radio, you took me to watch fourteen sunsets and twenty one love films, and lastly you made me four aphrodisiac dinners... but going further it’s not really an option! Look, that I’m not Heidi. I’m almost forty, you could’ve at least given me a kiss. Anyway now I feel the need of reflecting for a while, so please don’t look for me... I’ll be in touch. Steve blushed and looked at me astonished, without saying anything, I awkwardly gave him an expression of fact as if to say: Well, don’t worry, there are a lot more of them. In the meantime I asked myself why relationships between men and women are often so difficult. Human beings are the only species in the world where two elements of the opposite sex , to build a relationship, have to satisfy a lot of rules: first of all it is necessary that they found themselves mutually pleasant aesthetically, then that they have a dialogue and the same interests in a matter of cinema and music, of hobbies and readings, other than culture. Also they have to find the respective families pleasant, not to talk about the breath and the look, or the colour of the eyes and the hair or about work and the bank account, even if often all these elements have a different weight. Anyway every rule has its exceptions, so sometimes it happens that someone, to board in a sentimental relationship, finds just the bank account interesting enough, or just a single anatomic detail. And to think that all the other girls who live on the planet are often content with a smell or a colour!

Chapter 3

The contact

Suddenly Steve’s expression became sad and I found out to be really sorry about it, a few times I had seen him so bitter. While the tape of the voicemail kept scrolling bringing him trivial messages, he took his wallet from the pocket of his trousers. He pulled out a picture and a few letters all crumpled, he looked at the picture in silence for a few instants and then looked through the letters quickly because now he knew them by memory. He smelled them deeply, then he crumpled them up and was about to throw them away but he didn’t. He made his way to the cabinet of the living room, inserted a key in the keyhole of a drawer and he opened it. I had baptised it between myself the drawer of the missed occasions because it was full of pictures, letters, key rings, smelling, musical and glowing puppets, cinema and disco tickets, postcards, stuffed animals and various gadgets. With a sigh he threw the pictures and the letters in it, then he closed it back with an angry push and in that exact moment the scary awareness of what was waiting for me made its way in my body: at least two hours of exasperated breakdown, with also a synthesis of all the sentimental stories, never begun or died at the start, of the last twenty-nine years of his life... i.e. since he was eight to now. The funny thing was that almost all the women of the Police District had a crush on him, but he, as busy as he was with work, didn’t even notice. If instead of thinking always and only about his duty, he looked a bit around him, he would’ve surely found a girlfriend in less than five minutes.

I found a more comfortable position to prepare myself for that torture and I tried to look attentive and participant, in the end it was about my mate and I didn’t mean to let him down as well!

«Is it possible that since the first time when...» he had just started saying walking back and forth around the living room, when he stopped.

He ran to the voicemail, that in the meantime had kept listing off messages on messages, he rewound the last track and made it start again.

«There we are, the guy I told you about is willing to collaborate but he wants a lot of money. The appointment is tonight at nine at the old industrial area, in front of the only vacant warehouse. Try to be on time and most importantly come alone and unarmed, or else he takes flight and we’ll never track him down anymore» a raspy voice was saying, and I thanked it with all of me because it saved me from a proper torture. Steve checked the clock on the wall and jumped, he went to the coat rack and took his raincoat, that in the meantime had made a puddle of water on the floor, then he turned to look at me serious. Damn it, the whole world is plotting against me: no cartoons and no nap! I told myself disappointed, I jumped off the couch and followed him reluctantly.

Chapter 4

At the warehouse

Fortunately, in the meantime it had stopped raining. Steve had the bad habit of adjust himself on his own, so that his convertible car, in a far night of June, became definitely a cabriolet. He was the only one who in those cold and rainy days of the end of February drove with an umbrella tight between his legs, he excused himself repeating to me that the sunroof repair would’ve required a few of his salaries. The problem was that as soon as he accelerated a little, the umbrella punctually fell or flew away… with what he had spent on umbrellas he could’ve bought the whole car again!

«Damn it, we’re late» my friend pointed out stopping the car in front of the warehouse. The air was sparkly and had an intense and bitter smell, like petrol. A man with his hands drowned in the pockets was waiting for us in front of the gate, he was wearing a black jacket with the collar up and a hat with large flaps, that heavy with rain fell on the sides hiding almost his face. Steve got out of the car to head towards him and I followed him.

«Where’s the little bird?» Steve asked to the guy dressed in black.

«He already got in» the Boogeyman answered. «He said he can’t wait to have a little sing… but I warned you to come alone!» he added with a strict tone hinting at me with a movement of his head.

I quickly recognised the voice, it was the same one who left the message in the voicemail, I made out that the Boogeyman was probably one of our colleagues. Steve looked at me raising his eyebrows and shrugged, I went back to the car hopping ruefully. The man pushed the heavy sliding gate that gave access to the courtyard of the warehouse, as soon as they were in he hastily closed it and headed towards the main building, followed by Steve. I didn’t like that guy at all and I didn’t like that situation even more. If my friend had a flaw, it was the too much confidence in himself and sometimes also in others, given his profession I found that thing really weird. I also had some flaws: the first was that I hated being put aside, the second that, contrary to Steve, I never trusted anyone. As soon as the steps on the gravel were far I jumped out of the car again, I started following the perimeter of the fence in the search of a crack that allowed me to monitor them. I had almost completed the patrol of the building and I had just stopped to pee for the third time (you never know, sometimes it might happen to come back to the places) when suddenly the volume of the voices started rising, a sign that a violent discussion was on. Fearing that Steve might need me, I decided to quickly end the patrol in search of another entrance. Unfortunately the alley that followed the perimeter of the warehouse interrupted harshly in a dead end. The voices were heard louder and  tensed, now they became proper screams, I rotated the head a little and pricked up my ears to understand better what they were saying.

«But what’s happening? Are you by any chance crazy, or is this a prank? What do you want to do with that gun? Put it away, you could fire a bullet» my friend was saying worried.

«You need to tell me who the other snitches are!»

«But what do you want to do, do you want to shoot me?»

«If you make me do it I’ll shoot you, you can be sure of it! I told you that you have to tell me all the names, and then you have to stop get involved