Ask or Imagine: Episodes on the Journey to Becoming a Family

By Doug Haugen and Doris Haugen

Ask or Imagine: Episodes on the Journey to Becoming a Family is a collection of stories of one family's journey to grow in relationship to God and one another. Doug Haugen wrote a weekly column for the Auburn (CA) Journal for twelve years. The focus of this column was often the day to day joys and challenges of family life and how faith is part of that. There is humor. There are tears. There is much encouragement to just get through the day with God's grace.

• Language: English
• Publisher: BookBaby
• Release date: Jan 6, 2022
• ISBN: 9781667822365

Doug Haugen

Haugen is director of Lutheran Men in Mission, the men's ministry of the Evangelical Lutheran Church in America. He is also a freelance writer.

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Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask

or imagine, according to the power that is at work within us,

to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout

all generations, for ever and ever! Amen. Ephesians 3:20-21

Ask or Imagine: Episodes on the Journey to Becoming a Family

© 2021 by Doug and Doris Haugen

All right reserved. No portion of this book may be reproduced in any form

without permission from the publisher, except as permitted by U.S. copyright law.

For permissions contact: [e-mail].

The columns in this book, originally published in the Auburn Journal, Gold Country Media

(goldcountrymedia.com) from May 1985-June 1997, are used with permission.

Unless otherwise noted, Scripture quotations are taken from THE HOLY BIBLE,

NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION®, NIV® Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011

by Biblica, Inc.® Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide.

Scriptures marked (CEV) are from Contemporary English Version®

Copyright © 1995 American Bible Society. All rights reserved.

Scriptures marked (ESV) are from the ESV® Bible

(The Holy Bible, English Standard Version®). ESV® Text Edition: 2016.

Copyright © 2001 by Crossway, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers. 

All Scripture marked with the designation (GW) is taken from GOD’S WORD®.

© 1995, 2003, 2013, 2014, 2019, 2020 by God’s Word to the Nations Mission Society.

Used by permission.

Scripture quotations marked (MSG) are taken from THE MESSAGE,

copyright © 1993, 2002, 2018 by Eugene H. Peterson. Used by permission of NavPress.

All rights reserved. Represented by Tyndale House Publishers, Inc.

Scriptures marked (NLT) are from The Holy Bible, New Living Translation,

copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of

Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

All Scripture marked (NKJV) is taken from the New King James Version®.

Copyright © 1982 by Thomas Nelson. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

All Scripture quotations marked (NRSV) are from the New Revised Standard Version Bible,

copyright © 1989, by the Division of Christian Education of the National Council of the

Churches of Christ in the U.S.A., and are used by permission. All rights reserved.

Scripture quotations marked (TPT) are from The Passion Translation®.

Copyright © 2017, 2018, 2020 by Passion & Fire Ministries, Inc.

Used by permission. All rights reserved. ThePassionTranslation.com.

ISBN 978-1-66782-235-8 (Print)

ISBN 978-1-66782-236-5 (eBook)

A Note from the Team

For the twelve years I wrote for the Auburn Journal there was one name on the column but, even then, there should have been two. No writer is worth much without a good editor. Doris edited the column then and edited them years later to be put into this book. We worked together on deciding the one hundred columns that made the cut for this book and the hundreds that did not. Finally, she added the scriptures and prayers. This is a team effort.

The original title for the columns was Inside Out. The intent was to look at life, not from the surface, but underneath - inside out. The intent was to see Jesus in everyday life and how that relationship makes a difference. We are very grateful to the Auburn Journal/Gold Country Media for granting permission to use these columns once again in this book. The dates listed with each story are the dates they first appeared.

When we were married, we claimed Ephesians 3:20-21 to be the theme of our marriage and family. Through the wonderful web of relationships we have through friends and family we continue to be amazed at how God does bless us more than we could ask or imagine. We are blessed by the families we have come from and by the family we have been blessed to be a part of producing.

We dedicate this book to our children and their families

Derek and Dawn,

Krista, Bryce, Mickey and Kayja.

God has blessed us more than we could ask or imagine

as we continue to see God at work within you!

Contents

January 5, 1989 Peaceful Start

January 6, 1989 It’s Not Really About Shopping

January 7, 1994 Who Do We Welcome?

January 10, 1986 God’s Love, Something to Share

January 17, 1986 Becoming the Forgiver

January 20, 1989 Listen to the Children!

January 22, 1988 That Innocent Look

January 26, 1990 Oh Brother

February 2, 1990 Keep Walking

February 3, 1989 New Beginnings

February 5, 1993 Blessing in Who We Are

February 6, 1987 God’s Sense of Humor

February 7, 1992 Remembering to Move Forward

February 8, 1991 Just Listen

February 9, 1996 God Is with You

February 11, 1994 Our Life Is a Book

February 14, 1992 Valentine’s Day

February 14, 1986 Something to Remember

February 15, 1991 Taking Time

February 20, 1987 Real Security

March 3, 1989 Don’t Worry, Be Happy

March 3, 1995 Teachable Moments

March 11, 1988 Called to Be Creative

March 16, 1990 Lesson from the Road

March 17, 1989 Heritage of Faith

March 18, 1988 Friend of God

March 21, 1997 The Memo

March 23, 1990 Adventure Anyone?

March 25, 1994 Down Come the Bridges

March 27, 1992 Beautiful Feet

March 24, 1995 Called by Name

April 24, 1987 Patience Now!

April 25, 1986 This Is Heaven

April 26, 1991 God Loves Us, Messes and All

May 2, 1986 Being There Through the Night

May 3, 1985 Times and Seasons

May 9, 1986 God’s Love Through a Bag Lady

May 11, 1990 Free in Spirit

May 13, 1988 The Chair Calls

May 26, 1989 Mind the Store Rules

May 31, 1991 Ask a Child

June 2, 1989 He’s Here!

June 5, 1987 Time Justice

June 7, 1997 The Father’s Blessing

June 9, 1989 The Kiss

June 11, 1993 God at the Crossroads

June 13, 1986 A Father’s Legacy

June 14, 1985 The Privilege to Be Known

June 17, 1994 Remembering

June 21, 1996 Like a Kid

June 23, 1995 Relieved to Hear a Baby Cry - Then and Now

June 27, 1997 Your Best Shots Are Not Fading

June 28, 1996 No Longer Orphans

July 1, 1994 God’s Team

July 5, 1985 Our Children Teach Us

July 7, 1995 God Next to Us

July 17, 1987 Sounds and Sights in the Night

July 17, 1992 An Oasis

July 19, 1996 I May Not Be Cool, But My Friends Are!

July 22, 1988 We’re On the Same Team

July 26, 1991 God is the Key

July 26, 1996 So, We’re Cool!

August 4, 1989 Peace at Day’s End

August 6, 1993 Closer Than a Brother

August 8, 1986 Let’s Have Church

August 18, 1995 Our Guide and Protector

August 23, 1991 Hang On!

August 30, 1991 God’s Motherly Love

September 18, 1987 One Good Morning

September 21, 1995 Under the Hood

September 23, 1988 Dependable Love of Jesus

September 26, 1986 Taking Risks

September 26, 1996 Let go…and let God

September 27, 1985 Time to Share

October 13, 1989 The Roller Coaster of Life

October 16, 1987 From Embarrassment to Acceptance

October 18, 1985 God Never Sleeps

October 23, 1992 Complete Care

October 27, 1995 Grateful to Be Here

October 29, 1993 Logs and Toothpaste

November 5, 1993 Kids Set Us Straight

November 11, 1988 Roadside Potato Salad

November 11, 1994 Hope for the Morning Mess

November 11, 1993 Finding Jesus’ Love in the Dumpster

November 15, 1991 Love Over Coffee

November 19, 1993 Nice Guy–Today

November 25, 1988 Giving to the Bored!

November 26, 1989 Real Contentment

November 28, 1986 Footprints on the Wall

November 29, 1985 Thanksgiving Prayer

December 12, 1994 It All Starts with Family

December 9, 1994 The Annual Haugen Family Christmas Letter

December 11, 1987 An Ugly Tree Is Perfect

December 13, 1991 Dave’s Thanksgiving

December 13, 1996 Unhitch the Train Car

December 17, 1993 Be Ready!

December 19, 1986 Grandma’s Bible

December 20, 1991 A Glimpse

December 22, 1995 Quiet Moments in the Barn

December 31, 1987 Know Who Holds the Future

January 5, 1989

Peaceful Start

What a day I had the other day. My family all woke up in good moods. Usually, we’re doing well if three out of the four of us awaken with a smile on our face. And you can guess who the fourth usually is.

The other day I overheard my visiting brother-in-law tell my four-year-old niece behind a closed door, It’s not proper to spit in the mirror. Well, my usual morning response to that might be Why not? I am not pleased with what I see in the mirror–or most anything else–first thing in the morning. But this morning something was different. The sun was shining more than just outside. Things were going my way. It seemed as if everyone and everything was cooperating.

There were no brawls over toothpaste in the children’s bathroom. In fact, they left the house for the school bus in a calm and orderly fashion. All the traffic lights were green on my way to work. Other drivers actually insisted that I enter traffic lanes ahead of them.

I am a list person. I have at least one list for every day, and my lists are ambitious. Most days I feel fortunate to accomplish half the things I’ve written down. On his particular day, those check marks were appearing down the list as fast as I could get my pen out of my pocket. I heard someone say the other day, God must have been with me, the way things worked out so well. But if an easy, carefree life is a sign of God’s presence with us, most of the people the Bible lifts up as examples of faith were in trouble. Life was not easy for Moses in the wilderness, Paul in prison, or Mary and Joseph as they ran for their child’s life to Egypt.

God is present with us in times of frustration, despair, and need. God led Moses and the Israelites in the wilderness. He ministered to Paul in prison. He protected the young family. Success and prosperity were, if anything, but a glimmer of hope for these people. They had to live through the day first. But they had hope because they knew God was with them even in the bad times. It’s easy to sense God’s presence in the good times. But it’s when dark clouds start gathering again that we really need to be reminded that God is with us–caring, leading, and loving.

I need to remember when the day starts with a bathroom battle, God is no less with me and other members of the family. But I can still hope more days will start a bit more peacefully!

Hagar thought, Have I really seen God and lived to tell about it?

So from then on she called him, The God Who Sees Me.

Genesis 16:13 (CEV)

Thank you, God, that you are the One who sees me.

January 6, 1989

It’s Not Really About Shopping

I’m going to be in trouble in another four years or so (as if I’m not already)! In an attempt to get our children to reflect on the recent Christmas past before they started back to school, I asked what had made the holiday special for them.

Shopping! was the emphatic reply of our nearly nine-year-old daughter.

Shopping is not what I was fishing for. I don’t think of searching for a parking spot in an overcrowded shopping center as a highlight! Of course, she has a different perspective.

I was prepared to hear something about a sweet gift that dear old dad had given her. Maybe she would mention our trips about town to hear the carolers and see the beautiful Christmas lights. She might have even said something about the school or church programs. But, no, for her it was shopping. I was concerned.

And I may be more concerned as the years go on. You see our daughter is very particular about what she likes to wear! I must admit she generally has very good taste. But taste costs! Somehow this designer girl was born into a blue light special family and I’m hanging on to my credit cards with white knuckles until we are through the teen years!

But my fears were allayed when she added with grandma…shopping with grandma. Grandma, grandpa, and uncle (otherwise known as visitors from the north) made the trek from snowy Minnesota to sunny, er, snowy California to spend Christmas with their grand­children.

A visit from distant grandparents yields much more fruit than anything St. Nicholas could do. Grandma can be an easy target when wondering through a department store full of desires! But the more I thought about her comment, the more I realized there was more to her highlight than the acquisition of material goods. You see, shopping is a family event for us. We have fun. The whole mob just looks…and buys bargains only! But we do it together. And that’s what our daughter enjoys.

Relationships…that’s what Christmas, and Christ is about. He wants relationship with us.

I’m glad to know grandma, grandpa and uncle are still her highlight. But I still think I’m going to be in trouble in a few years!

For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son,

that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have

eternal life. John 3:16

Lord, help me to keep focus on what is most important

in this world of noise and distractions.

January 7, 1994

Who Do We Welcome?

A cloud of steam engulfed our van while we were whizzing through Wisconsin, not quite over the river and through the woods, on our way to Grandmother’s house this past Christmas. The cloud drifted east and came to a stop in front of a service station. A group of experts were gathered around the coffee pot inside. They were listening to the Minnesota-Green Bay game.

I entered, forgetting that I was wearing my Viking cap. The experts unzipped their coats and let their bellies hang out. The words Green Bay Packers exploded from behind their winter wear. They each pulled a drag from their cigarettes, squinted at me as they exhaled, and shared their expert opinions with me. They had opinions…about the Vikings, and the Packers, and what was wrong with my car.

Fortunately, the one who actually did the work was not part of the inner circle. He was the one who knew what my van problem was, and how to solve it. He pulled, yanked, hammered, and yanked some more and finally got the water pump out. He called every parts store he knew and managed to find the right part, on a Sunday.

When I returned, he said that it had been a