Derp Meets Earth

By Elle Scott

Derp Meets Earth is a look at the lives of three alien children and their pet who crash land a
hijacked space pod on earth and learn to survive in a whole new world of dangerous characters
and exciting happenings.
The story is filled with lovable, likable core characters that, even though they are not of this
world, are flawed just as humans are. They are typical kids; they make mistakes and then must
live with those decisions and do their best to overcome the challenges that result.
They must confront prejudice for their uniqueness, yet they find that true friendship does not care
if you are covered with long fur or come from another planet, it is who you are that really
matters.
On the planet Murgon, Derp, Squeep and Ziba are just regular kids. They go to school, hang out
together walking on the ceiling of Derp's house, and since there isn't any gravity on Murgon, it's
a pretty normal kid activity. They're just kids, you know. They are likable and a lot like us,
except covered in long, colorful fur.
Earth is pretty well known in the universe. Derp, Squeep and Ziba learned of our ways as the
people of Murgon had always planned to visit Earth. They quickly learn that there is much more
to this planet than what they learned in textbooks. Yes, Earth is everything they have learned
about, but it can be a very dangerous place for those who are different.
 

• Language: English
• Publisher: Blackthorne Media Group
• Release date: Dec 5, 2021
• ISBN: 9798201728366

Book preview

Derp Meets Earth

Elle Scott

A black and white sign Description automatically generated with low confidence

THIS BOOK IS A WORK of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously.  Any resemblance to actual events, locales, or persons, living or dead is coincidental.

No beings from other planets were harmed in the making of this book.

Copyright 2021 by Elle Scott

Cover art Wolfdog Graphics, LLC.

All rights reserved. In accordance with the U.S. Copyright Act of 1976, the scanning, uploading, and electronic sharing of any part of this book without the permission of the publisher is unlawful piracy and theft of the author’s intellectual property.  If you would like to use material from this book (other than for review purposes), prior written permission must be obtained by contacting the publisher at [e-mail]

Thank you for your support of the author’s rights.

The publisher is not responsible for websites (or their content) that are not owned by the publisher.

First Paperback Edition: December 2021 by Blackthorne Media Group.

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

Scott, Elle, 2020 Derp Meets Earth/Elle Scott – 1st ed. P. cm

Summary: Derp Meets Earth is a look at the lives of three alien children and their pet who crash land a hijacked space pod on earth and learn to survive in a whole new world of dangerous characters and exciting happenings.

Printed in the United States

To My Children

For joining the world that lives in my head,

and always believing it is real.

You have been my friends, replied Charlotte,

That in itself is a tremendous thing...

Charlotte’s Web

- E.B. White -

Contents

Chapter One: Planet Murgon

Chapter Two: Derp, Squeep, Ziba & Steve

Chapter Three: Education Time

Chapter Four: The Pod

Chapter Five: Children of Earth

Chapter Six: Dr. Kenpus

Chapter Seven: Recovery Mission

Chapter Eight: Toad’s Plan

Chapter Nine: The Doctor Finds Out

Chapter Ten: The Transmitter

Chapter Eleven: All is Lost

Chapter Twelve: Todd’s Catch

Chapter Thirteen: Saving Steve

Chapter Fourteen: It’s Over

Chapter Fifteen: Reunion

PROLOguE

Help!!.... Squeep!!...Ziba!!, someone...anyone...Help me!  I can’t breathe, there is some horrible slimy ooze covering my face, I try to peel it away from my mouth.  It’s up my nose, in my throat, it’s choking me.  Then, gross!  There is this awful, horrible, worst, most disgusting smell, and it’s everywhere! It’s like the gas you get after eating beans combined with stinky feet. There is a pinching in my back, and I’m being tossed around like an old shoe!  HELP! I’m pretty sure whatever grabbed me is running.  NOOOOO! A slobbery thing dropped me.  It’s staring at me, tongue dangling from the side of its huge mouth, thick ropes of slime dripping from its lips.  I see a mouth filled with sharp, pointed teeth.  They are coming for me...nooooo!! Someone help me!

Okay, just stop right here, hold everything.  Let’s back up and start from the beginning. You have no idea what’s going on, or even who I am, let’s fix that.  Hi, I’m Derp and I come from the planet Murgon.  It’s a long way from earth, and I know, you’re probably asking, ‘How did you get to earth, Derp?’  Well, just hang on and I’ll explain everything.

*****

Chapter One: Planet Murgon

THE UNIVERSE IS FULL of stars and planets spinning around in the solar system. Some planets and stars are far away, and some are nearby. The big ones and the close ones—like the sun, our moon, and a few stars and planets—we can see, but many others—the very tiny planets, the far away moons and solar systems, and the smallest of stars—are simply unable to be seen, even using the most powerful telescopes.  It won’t be long before some of the telescopes on earth are able to see Murgon, which is what earth scientists would call an exoplanet, and the physics that make them expect to think that planets should be round. But when a planet or star isn’t round, well, that’s when things become a bit tricky.  Since Murgon isn’t round, it is likely to stay hidden, at least for now.

But if you look for an orbiting star, far from earth, and a little to the left of planet Blip, you will find a planet called Murgon, home of the Troids. Troids are happy, colorful, hairy little beings. They don’t look anything like Earth humans; they are different and beautifully special.

Some Troids think that if Murgon were round, like so many other planets, it would have been discovered long ago. Being flat and quite thin, it seems to just exist in its own universe, never being detected by space explorations or high-tech devices. Exploring the planet can be dangerous, if you aren’t careful.  You could fall right off the edge and into the universe. 

Murgon has an upside and a downside to the planet.  The upside is where everyone lives, works and education takes place. There are roads, and parks where children play games and grown Murgonites can sit and enjoy a beautiful day.  It’s like any city you would find on an inhabited planet.  The downside is covered, from end to end in lush edible greenery. Plants that feed the inhabitants of Murgon are grown there, every imaginable food can be found, fresh and ready to be picked by the downside workers.

Murgon is perched high in the solar system, on the opposite side of the galaxy from earth, in the far away constellation of Gadianton. The ruler of Murgon for the past 300 years has been  Murg A. Troid, for whom the planet is now named.  He is more than a thousand years old.  He is so old that his colors have begun to fade. His glorious, deep jewel tones of purple, teal, and gold are dulled and have begun to blur together. Still, he is very wise and rules Murgon with kindness and fairness, making Murgon the most wonderful planet in the entire universe, which is why he is much revered by all the Troids.

But Murgon wasn’t always so wonderful. Five hundred years ago, there was a great war on Murgon.  Emperor Shiz, then ruler of the planet, was a dark and evil leader. He thought he knew what was best for the inhabitants of Murgon and he decided everything! He wanted to tell the people of Murgon where they could live and how they could raise their families, and he did this by frightening the people of Murgon. They lived in such fear of Emperor Shiz, they would tremble and shake just hearing his name. He made the people very unhappy; they wanted to make their own choices and not simply do as Emperor Shiz demanded. But he would have none of that and handed out punishment to anyone who tried to think for themselves and challenge him. Some were sent to the edge of Murgon and living on the edge was very frightening. The edges of Murgon were cold and bleak, there was little in the way of comforts and food was only what could be reached by laying down, holding on to the edge and reaching under to pluck some of the vegetation that grew on the underside.

Before Shiz was Emperor Shiz, back when he was very young, he fell in love with Princess Ziah, the beautiful daughter of King Zohair.  Ziah found Shiz to be a despicable man who only cared about himself, and she had no interest in being his wife.  He asked the king if he could marry his daughter, without even asking Princess Ziah if she wished to be his bride.  The king said, NO! He explained that Shiz didn’t have any royal blood, so he could never marry a princess. King Zohair laughed at Shiz, right in his face, and sent him