Sparkle: Enigma Models INC, #2

By Alyne Hart

I walked away from the one girl I've ever really loved. The most painful thing I've ever done. I've never been good enough for her, and keeping my distance is hard. But it has to be done. For her. For me. For us.

She's everything I've ever wanted. Miley and her sunshine sparkle. When I close my eyes, I can still see her spinning beneath the stars, laughing and eating cotton candy. It's the only thing that keeps me going.

When I come back a better man, healing from my own personal hell…the only question is…is she mine? Or is she his?

• Language: English
• Publisher: Alyne Hart
• Release date: Mar 4, 2022
• ISBN: 9781393474814

Alyne Hart

Alyne Hart is a contemporary romance author and wine connoisseur living in Walla Walla, WA. She's known for writing stories that pack an emotional punch and get you right in the feels.  She loves writing real, flawed characters and writing about realistic, gritty and raw romance. She's a romance junkie and happy endings addict, and if you’re a lover of deeply emotional, flawed and realistic romance reads with lots of delicious angst, her books are for you. Alyne's stories involve characters with bigger problems than just finding love. She writes stories about making peace with the past, rekindling old flames and healing old wounds. She loves small towns, men in uniform and alpha males with a heart of gold.  She began her story-telling journey first with her dolls, then it progressed to paper. She has a deep love for anything romantic, and she's a believer that in love anything is possible.  When Alyne isn’t writing, you can find her reading, hanging out with her cat, and spending time with her two children. She enjoys trips to the mountains just as much as trips to the wine cellar, live music, chick flick movie marathons and hanging out with her eclectic group of friends.  Follow Alyne: Facebook → http://bit.ly/2w89KNP Twitter → http://bit.ly/2w8kRqb Blog → http://bit.ly/2vxvmGy Goodreads → http://bit.ly/2vv8S8S Bookbub → http://bit.ly/2fyhncE Newsletter → https://mailchi.mp/a8a0de143ef8/alynehart

Book preview

This book is dedicated to Lulu <3

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This is my confession. As dark as I am, I will always find enough light to adore you to pieces, with all of my pieces.

~ Johnny Nguyen

1

Miley

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SUMMER BURNED HOT IN Los Angeles. Some of the worst wildfires on record swept through southern California, destroying neighborhoods and forcing people from their homes. Santa Ana winds ripped through the valley, making everything a hundred times worse.

Perspiration dripped down my temples despite the sun dipping behind the ocean. It lit the sky in a brilliant display of magenta and gold. I stood on the patio of the penthouse apartment I shared with Luke, overlooking the sweeping landscape of the city. My paintbrush moved smoothly across a canvas, creating a roadmap of colorful grooves. Luke sat in a lounge chair reading Nietzsche and wearing a linen shirt and tan shorts, sipping a glass of sparkling water with slices of lime. Not a drop of sweat marred his always pristine appearance, and he smiled at me. A perfect, blinding smile, brighter than the setting sun. I brushed back a stray ribbon of hair with the back of my hand and shot him a smile in return.

Life was mostly perfect these days.

Luke and I had fallen into a comfortable pattern. Living with him wasn't as complicated as I thought it might be in the beginning. The fact that we both traveled so much for various campaign photoshoots probably had a lot to do with it. While he had grown moody in recent months, I mostly chalked it up to stress. About what, I wasn't so sure. We didn't really talk about things like that. Sometimes we bickered, but we always made up afterward. And what apologies couldn't cover, our sex life more than made up for. I told myself we were still in the tail end of a honeymoon phase and coming into the reality phase. There were bound to be a few hiccups along the way.

My contract with Etienne Jeans had made me a household name. It seemed the paparazzi was always waiting, and fans begged for autographs and photos everywhere I went.  None of it had really sunk in as my new reality, though, as it was still strange to see my images in magazines like I was viewing an alien version of myself. I very rarely had to go on go-sees anymore. Photographers and magazines requested me, and Enigma Models INC arranged the contracts. Gabriela ensured I only worked with the most prestigious names in fashion and beauty. After a while, Luke helped me negotiate a higher payout for my work as well. And while I loved the life I was living, I felt like I'd traveled the entire globe in the last year, and honestly, I just wanted to relax.

Just over four months had passed without me hearing anything from Kellan. I tried not to let it eat at me. But it still clawed at my gut and reached up and squeezed my heart, especially with how things had been between us the last time we'd spoken. I'd spent a lot of time questioning the things I'd said and done and how it had gotten so bad. I know Luke knew how I felt, though we didn't talk about that either. I guessed when it came down to it, I didn't really know how to express the depth of my emotions to him.  

Yet, he knew it affected me. I often found myself zoning out and caught up in a whirlpool of memories, trying to unravel everything that played out between he and I and what I could have done differently. I'd go on crying jags in the shower. I checked my phone constantly to see if he'd finally messaged, if nothing else, to put me out of my misery. It was as if a huge chunk of me was missing, and I had no idea how to get it back.

Lost in thought, staring at streaks of bright pink and lavender paint on the canvas before me, Luke's hand grazed my neck. I turned to see him standing at my side, a smile lifting the corners of his cheeks as he watched me paint.

Hi, he said, shooting me his brilliant, megawatt smile.

Hi. I smiled back.

Luke studied me like I was the most fascinating person on the planet, and I lost focus. I set the paintbrush down and turned, wrapping my arms around his neck. Looking up into his mossy green eyes, I melted. He was so handsome. Sexy. Everything about him did something to every cell in my body. Then he let loose a devilish grin.

A giggle bubbled on my lips. What's that look?

He chuckled, the bass of it rumbling through my veins as he circled his arms around my waist. Just watching my beautiful, sexy girlfriend. Is that a crime?

Mmhmm, I sighed. Is that all? I know that look in your eye, mister.

I can't help it. He tugged me closer. You do it for me.

His mouth slanted over mine, and he kissed me hard. It was the kind of kiss that he usually gave me after one of us had returned from a trip. Not the sort of kiss you gave someone you'd been sitting on the patio with for hours. One of his arms held me close while his free hand snaked up to wind itself in my hair. A throaty moan escaped my chest.

Because Luke? Oh, my God. Luke. He did things to me too.

All six foot two of him was pure physical perfection incarnate and never failed to make my thighs tingle and my panties dampen. There was a reason Luke graced as many magazine pages as he had. His body was lean and muscular, but not overly so. His face was as elegant as it was masculine. Regal somehow. And the piercing green of his eyes only added to his magnetic appeal.

More than that, with Luke, I felt safe and adored. With Luke, I only felt good. I rarely thought about the sadness of my upbringing or awful memories anymore. I never felt like I was hovering on the edge of chaos and ready to self-destruct. And with Luke, I didn't want to run.

Without a word, he took my hand, and I followed him to the kitchen. My fingers searched out the buttons to his shirt while he rolled my sundress up around my waist. I flung his shirt to the floor as the air whooshed from my lungs. My body ached almost painfully for him, knowing the pleasure that awaited me. His hands gripped my hips and lifted me to the kitchen counter, and shoved my thighs apart, taking me in another greedy kiss.

God, you're so beautiful, he said, low and husky. His eyes roamed my body, and anticipation surged between my legs.

His fingers hooked into the sides of my thong, digging into the flesh of my hips. He kissed the tops of my thighs, his teeth nibbling down until his hot breath washed over the sensitive skin covered by a thin triangle of fabric. He kissed me where I was throbbing and needy, sliding his tongue over the delicate lace that separated his mouth from my clit. One of his fingers slid beneath the fabric and stroked me, and my head burst into fireworks. I arched and gasped, desperate for more. When the first swipe of his tongue made contact, I dug my hands into his hair and cried out.

Leaning back on my elbows to give Luke more access, he drove me crazy with his talented mouth. I was on fire, drenched with desire and barely able to keep it together.

Luke pulled back to look at me. His full lips wet and glistening, he murmured my name like both a curse and a prayer. When his fingers dove inside me, I was done for. A shock of pure bliss coursed through me and pulsed.

He pulled me down from the counter, roughly lifting the dress over my head, and tossed it to the side. The look in his eyes was so full of lust and hunger, I could have died right there and been happy. I knew what he wanted. It was his biggest kink these days. I bit down on my lower lip and blushed as he cocked an eyebrow and guided me towards a panoramic picture window overlooking the glittering lights of the city.

With my palms and breasts pressed to the glass, I tilted my ass back towards him, his hands gripping my hips. His erection pressed to my wet sex and slid inside with one stroke. Deep. We both gasped at the sensation, and I was nothing more than a needy, moaning mess. My head rolled back as he thrust deeper and harder, taking my body up to a place of pure blissful sensation. My hips bucked, urging him to go deeper. I whimpered with need, and my thigh muscles clenched tight as I called out his name.

Who's are you, baby? He growled, slamming into me with such force, my knees locked to keep me upright.

Yours, I gasped. I’m yours.

Luke thrust into me savagely. Pounding at my body while my breasts smashed against the window that we could see out of, but no one could see in. A chorus of ‘yes’ and ‘oh God’ fell from my lips as our bodies shuddered together in climax.

2

Miley

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LIGHT AND AIRY. IT was the first thing that hit me when I walked in, then the scent of cedarwood and lavender drifted to my nostrils. My hands trembled, and I prayed to God I didn’t trip over my own sneaker-clad feet with the nervous excitement stirring inside me.

Oh my God, Starr! A gorgeous cinnamon-haired girl in pigtails screeched from the other side of a yoga studio as she bounded in my direction. She held her arms out wide, ready to wrap me in a hug. I have been dying to meet you. Oh my gosh, I am so glad you came!

I smiled at the girl I recognized solely from Instagram, then wrapped my arms around her and hugged her back. Reagan!

Hiiii! The word burst from her chest like a bubble.

Reagan was a social media influencer I’d been following since I moved to Los Angeles. Her friendly, happy vibe, picturesque backdrops, and inviting smile drew me in right away. Today was the launch of a cosmetics collection she collaborated on with a majorly popular brand, and I was on the guest list.

We’d developed a friendship, first just supporting each other's posts, and eventually, we had begun chatting almost daily through DM’s and texts for the past several months. When she invited me to her launch party, my tummy tumbled in the best way possible. I’d never had many female friends.

The event itself was by invite only. First was a yoga session since it was Reagan's passion and what gained her a massive following. Then lunch, playing with make-up, and networking.

Reagan took my arm and tugged lightly, leading me towards the front of the room, where she plopped down on a lime green mat. It matched the cute yoga pants and flowy, cropped tank top she wore. Her long-limbed body twisted into an elegant criss-cross-apple-sauce position, and she smiled radiantly. She let out another excited squeal and hugged me again. How are you? Oh my gosh, you’re even prettier in person. How is that possible?

So are you, I gushed. Thank you so much for inviting me. I’ve been so excited about today.

Are you kidding? Her dark brown eyes widened as she reached out and playfully swatted at my leg. You’ve been such an inspiration to me. Honestly, we should have gotten together a lot sooner, but life just gets so busy.

I gave a light shrug and nodded. Tell me about it. So who are all these people? I don’t know anyone.

Reagan pointed out the representatives from the make-up brand and a handful of other influencers and models who’d joined for the day's festivities. A steady stream of people came by to congratulate and hug her, taking the time to introduce themselves to me. The laid-back and friendly vibe so far was so different from anything else I’d done since moving to LA. Most of the time (all of the time really) I felt like things were solely about my body or my face. Here, I actually felt included because of me. I tried my best to contain the grin spread wide across my cheeks and not look like such a dork.

A fit and tan male yoga instructor with a shaggy topknot led us through a workout. I’d never done yoga before, so I wasn’t too sure of what to expect. After forty-five minutes of breathing, stretching and holding intricate poses, peace and bliss rushed through my veins. The strange sensation of feeling close to people I’d just met minutes before took me over, and all I wanted to do was hug everyone. I was hooked and couldn’t wait to do it again.

Lunch was catered by a fancy whole foods restaurant in Westwood Village. Buddha bowls, massive piles of melons and berries, and fruit-filled sparkling water. I was in heaven.

Reagan and I seemed permanently glued together. Talking and chatting like two long-lost best friends. In fact, it was the best day I’d had in a very long time.

You and Luke are such a cute couple, she said, taking a delicate bite of food. Her eyes grew wide with admiration  as she spoke. I just love you guys' posts. I need a man like that. Dating in LA is a nightmare.

He is pretty great, I sighed, nibbling on a wedge of watermelon.

Her brow quirked curiously as she swiped at a stray strand of hair that had escaped the scrunchies holding her high, curling pigtails in place. I haven’t seen Kellan posting anything in a long time. Is he doing okay?

And just like that, my stomach dropped. I knew she meant no harm. No one knew the depths of how I felt about Kellan. To the public, he was nothing more than my hard-partying best friend. She had no idea that just the mention of his name launched me into a spiral of memories I’d tried so hard to keep at bay. Kellan was so seared into my mind, it’s like he was part of my DNA.

The image of his blue eyes rolled into my vision and the way he used to lock me in with that hauntingly beautiful stare. His boyish and charming smile that I was always lucky enough to see when no one else did. The way his hands were almost always threading through his dark hair. His laugh and how we fit together like peanut butter and jelly.

I missed him. I missed him so much it hurt.

I took a gulp of air and tried to get it together.

He’s okay, I lied, shooting her a brilliant smile. Just taking some time off from it all. This lifestyle is pretty crazy sometimes.

Oh, for sure, she said, her chocolate brown eyes softening a bit. You guys always had the funniest posts. It just looked like you two had such a great time together.

Right? I nodded and gulped, digging my fork around in my bowl of quinoa and figs. He’s one of a kind. So what about you? I changed the subject. Are you dating anyone?

Her nose scrunched, and she stuck out her tongue. No. But I met a cute guy on Bumble. So we’ll see.

Reagan babbled on and on, and I did my best to listen. Other girls around the table jumped in, and a lively conversation about boys and crushes ensued. Meanwhile, I gripped the edges of my chair in my hands and did my best just to force oxygen into my lungs.

It was stupid. I had a great boyfriend. He and I lived an enviable life. I loved Luke. Everyone did. He treated me like a princess, told me every day how beautiful I was, and he'd opened his home to me when I needed him the most. We were a power couple and media darlings. The entire world knew we were madly in love. And yet, just the mention of the name Kellan could send me into a dark abyss of longing. He was a chapter I couldn’t seem to close.

My brain spun in a mad rush. I needed to get over the idea of Kellan. I was quite possibly the worst girlfriend in the world, and I needed to squash that inner voice that made me cling to Kellan once and for all. Tamping down the riot of emotions storming through me, I pasted a smile on my face and dove headfirst into the girlish conversation happening around me.

Lunch came to an end, and we were gently herded into another space filled with long tables holding brightly colored gift bags containing eyeshadow palettes, lipgloss, brushes, and more. Make-up artists waited as we poured through the tables with audible gasps and shrieks. As they had been all day, photographers took snapshots of our fun to use for PR. Reagan posed with everyone, her gorgeous face permanently creased from smiling.

When the day was over, I had a phone full of new contacts, a lunch date with Reagan, and a massive bag full of make-up and skincare. Luke picked me up, and his face cracked into a wide smile when he saw how happy I was.

Did you have fun? He asked, leaning over the console to kiss my cheek.

I had so much fun, I melted into the leather seat with exhaustion. Everyone was so nice. It wasn’t like any of the photoshoots or anything I’ve been to. It was super relaxed, and I made so many friends. Oh, and I love yoga!

His eyebrow cocked as he gave me a half-smile. Yoga?

Yeah!

You’re glowing, baby girl, he mused. So yoga must have loved you back.

He turned on some music, and my mind turned to the conversation I’d had with Reagan, and I smiled at the memory. I’d so craved a meaningful female friendship since moving to LA. Yeah, I had fun with Luke. But there was something special about having a girlfriend to talk to. A deep warmth bloomed through my chest, despite the feelings just one tiny conversation had stirred up earlier.

3

Kellan

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I WOULD FUCKING KILL for a cigarette.

Resting my forehead in my hands, I exhaled a loud breath from my nose. This was my least favorite part about where I was: the talking and all the questions. I hated my therapist waiting me out until I finally purged more emotional shit from my head, and how every time I said I didn’t know, she’d nod and say, ‘I think you do know.’ Of course I already knew why I’m the unique brand of fucked up that I am. Sometimes I didn’t understand why I had to say it out loud.

I know it’s hard, Kellan, the woman sitting in front of me said. No one likes this. But it does help. I promise you it does.

I straightened my spine against the chair's back, pinching my nose with my fingers, and studied her. Out of all of them I’d been paired with in here, I felt the most comfortable with her. She was older, forty or fifty maybe? Petite in stature so that if she sat all the way back on the couch, her feet barely skimmed the floor. Sleekly bobbed brown hair, manicured nails, and big round glasses she was constantly pushing up her nose, making her look younger than she was. But it was her eyes. They were the same color as Miley’s. You might call them hazel if you didn’t look hard enough because really, they were this warm honey color that instantly put me at ease.

She watched me closely, her small hands folded into her lap on top of a long, wheat-colored dress. Her legs were crossed at the ankles, and she leaned forward.

I studied her face for a long beat before speaking. I feel like I’ve talked about it to death. There’s got to be something other than him you want to know about.

I understand. She gave a slight smile. We have talked him about a lot. Do you believe me when I say I want to help?

I guess. I gave a slight shrug.

Well, then I think we’re getting somewhere. Do you remember your first few weeks?

A dark chuckle pushed through my lips. Yeah.

I’d like to talk more about your stepfather. Jack.

My gut twisted, and I shifted in my seat. Yeah, no.

Scale of one to ten? She asked.

A hundred, I said through a grimace, snaking an impatient hand through my hair.

One to ten. The scale Dr. Bennett assigned to my wanting to use. She’d taught me about triggers to my emotional traumas that made me want to get fucked up when I recalled them. She told me how any strong emotion like fear, anger, sadness, or feeling out of control could cause a reaction that came out in my behavior. Some people shut down, some people become violent or regress. My response was to be numb by any means necessary. I didn’t need