More 4-H Stories from the Heart

By Pamela Bloch

For over a century, the 4-H Program has grown from its start as a rural program designed to share research across the nation to become the world's largest youth development program. Much of this is thanks to the individuals who have participated in the program, parents of those members, thousands of volunteers, and the dedication of the hundreds of 4-H professionals who have worked with the program. More 4-H Stories from the Heart was created as a sequel to our original 4-H Stories from the Heart and includes so many more touching stories of individuals impacted by the 4-H program and releases in celebration of our association's 75th Anniversary.

Hear the many lessons learned by so many through their participation as members and volunteers. Laugh with us while reading "No Cookies in Your Tent," "This Concludes My Demonstration. Are There Any Questions?", and "Making the Worst OK." Learn about the life experiences through international exchanges in "Pointing Me Forward" and "A Small World."

More 4-H Stories from the Heart is a National Association of Extension 4-H Youth Development Professionals project. Proceeds will be used to support advancing the mission of NAE4-HYDP.

• Language: English
• Publisher: BookBaby
• Release date: Oct 25, 2021
• ISBN: 9781667809793

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Volunteers: The Heart of 4-H

The Letter

Dalegene Larson –Idaho, Submitted by Jo Ann Smith Trail – Idaho

Editor’s Note: This story contains excerpts from a five page hand written letter written by Dalegene Larson to the Trail family following the tragic death in January 2015 of David M. Trail, one of the founders of Latah County, Idaho’s Mountain View 4-H Club which was started in 1972. Dalegene was an Idaho State Forestry winner and attended the National 4-H Congress in Chicago in 1978. In 1989 Dalegene and his wife were married at the Portland Latter Day Saints temple. When they visited the temple before their wedding, he saw the gardeners setting out flats of pansies and asked if he could help and he planted all 1,000 plants around the reflection pool in a couple of hours, leading to a job as a gardener there the following year. His great love of plants landed him a job where he was able to plant world class gardens around multi million dollar buildings and maintain them on a yearly basis. He has planted 50,000 flowers a year for 25 years. In the spring when 25,000 tulips are in bloom, he is called the Tulip Master and the rest of the year he is called the Lorax, Dr. Seuss’s character who cared for the Truffala Trees. In addition, Dalegene received five trophies from the City of Portland for growing roses and the Mayor’s award for the best roses in the city.

Dalegene gave permission to use his comments for this heartfelt story.

Dale’s letter: To my dearest Trail families: My thoughts and prayers have been with you all week. David was a good man, the best of men. The sum of life consists on the people you know and the things you do. I wanted to write and express my gratitude for the influence you have had on my life. So much of who I am and what I have become stems back to those early teenage years in 4-H with gardening and forestry projects. Filling out record books and writing stories prepared me for handling the inevitable, necessary paper work in my adult life.

Dalegene recalls that Entomology was one of the first projects he took. His leader, Mrs. Wilma Sprague, loaded up all the kids in her old VW bus to go catch bugs at Robinson Lake. Amid club meetings and parliamentary procedure, he pledged his head to clearer thinking, his heart to greater loyalty and his hands to larger service and his health to better living for his community, his country and his world. Rocketry and model airplanes were popular projects. Every time his family cooks a holiday turkey, he reminisces about the Sandwiches Galore project and the saucy cranberry turkey sandwiches he and the other boys made. (Now he incorporates sauerkraut into the sandwiches.) Creative food preparation.

Mrs. Jo Ann Trail taught that group of boys how to cook and in the process explained in a matter of fact way why young women needed additional iron in their diet. It just made sense to him.

Tree identification contests at the Latah County Fair and a spring plant sale provided new experiences. Mrs. Trail had given Dalegene permission to take cuttings from her large banana (split leaf) Diefenbachia, which was getting too tall and leggy. In his demonstration, he showed the procedure for cutting off the main stem to make new little cuttings. He states he can still hear her shriek of horror when she saw he had cut her plant to the ground and laid the corpse of the thing on the nearby ping pong table. (The mother plant survived the attack!!)

Another funny incident happened at the club’s progressive dinner. At the Larson house, his mother asked Dalegene to take coats to the master bedroom and lay them on the bed, which she also used to fold laundry. As the guests were leaving, somehow some of the laundry got scooped up with the coats. As one of the girls started to put her arm in her coat, an athletic supporter got caught up in her coat sleeve. She picked it up, screamed and threw it across the room. It landed on the curtains and Dalegene retrieved it, mortified to the extreme.

Years later, Dalegene went to college in West Chicago and had great fun giving tours to the other students, exploring all the sites he had seen when he attended the National 4-H Congress. On his LDS two year mission in Italy, he became so engrossed in the culture and language that initially he couldn’t speak English when he returned home.

Dalegene feels that he is but one person who because of David Trail has gone on to do great things and influence others much like David influenced him. Keep passing it on, Dalegene.

Walk Back, Sit Down

Michelle Simmons – Utah

Walk back, sit down. Sounds like pretty basic instructions, right? However, when you think of it, training, skill, and faith all play a part in such a seemingly simple act. Even more, when we have mastered the initial steps do we seek opportunities to expand what we know to the next level? One of the most profound lessons I have ever received as a 4-H leader was what it meant to be a true leader and never assume that I don’t need to take my leadership game to the next level. In 2014, I took six of my teens to a leadership camp hosted by Utah County in Bear Lake.

I was excited for the opportunity that my youth would have. They would learn important leadership skills but, it never occurred to me that I would be the one who would be the most impacted by this camp. One of the leadership activities was rappelling at the Paris Ice Cave. Many of the teens had been rappelling before while some had not. Me? I was in the latter category but the camp wasn’t for me anyways so it didn’t matter, right? I was excited to try but my self-assigned duty was to help the kiddos be ready to go when it was their turn. The teens who had been rappelling before geared up and with no fear backed up and disappeared over the edge of the cliff only to come running back up the other side ready to go again. The newbies weren’t quite so quick to walk backward off a cliff and while some showed a little hesitance they committed and down they went. Others needed a bit more coaxing and reassuring that we would not let them die. This is where I come in as the mega-awesome-talk-you-off-a-cliff leader whose super power is to convince youth that they can do this! After the first few rounds of kids had gone it somehow became my turn and with no fear I walked up, clipped on, got my instructions from the Craig Dart (a mash-up of shaolin monk and superman in disguise), took my first step backward and decided today was not the day to plummet to my death with a crowd of youth watching and all, you get it, right? Craig could see the sheer panic settle on my face and did not try to use my super powers of persuasion against me but let me off the hook, no pun intended. I retreated to a nearby spot to take pictures to the youth enjoying their activity when it occurred to me that I had failed as a leader. I had used the do as I say, not as I do to get out of an uncomfortable situation.

Reflecting on the terrified faces of the kiddos who I cheered on as they walked backwards off a cliff, who saw me as a leader that would never ask them to do anything I wouldn’t do myself was too much. The longer I sat there, the more I convinced myself that I had no right to be a leader. Luckily for me, my wise and noble mentor Craig and his amazing sidekick Brent, realized that I needed a leader to look up to at that moment and invited me to go back up and give rappelling one more try. I screwed my courage to the sticking place and followed Brent back up the rocks, where Craig got me suited up and Brent took his place at the bottom. Once I was ready to go I could hear Craig, almost like he was speaking from a distance I heard words like handbrake, on belay, and then the inevitable, walk back, sit down. I locked eyes with Craig and started to walk backwards, Craig then said sit down. Now at that moment my vision went a little hazy and I began an inventory of things I needed to repent of, quickly followed by a list of reasons I should not do this, and then the haze was replaced by the faces of the teens who looked up to me. Clear vision now, I will do this, right in front of me was Craig, walk back, sit down Michelle, you can do this, I’ve got you, Brent and I won’t let you fall. One, two, three, walk back, sit down, I DID IT! I was over the ledge and the only thing I can say to describe what I was feeling is that it felt like I was being tasered and tickled all at the same time! Dallin Bunnell, one of the teens who was at the camp shared a quote with me that says, There is no growth in the comfort zone, and no comfort in the growth zone.That day Craig became my definition of what a leader should be and who I would model my leadership style after.

Since then I have had a few adventures with Craig which have included a midnight hike and rappelling activity in which we had to grab a rope and use narrow footholds to scramble over a boulder that hung out over a shallow stream, and a mountain bike training in which I failed miserably when I let fear take over and fell off a small cliff near the trail (nothing injured but my pride) and I have every intention of going back next year and conquering that trail!

Although I cannot recall at what age I mastered the art of walking backwards and sitting down without looking behind me, the memory of my first time rappelling prompted me to adopt a motto from a quote by Tom Brady that goes, I did not come this far, to only come this far. The phrase walk back, sit down has taken on a whole new meaning, it is no longer tied to an unconsciously performed act but a reminder to lock in, commit, and take the necessary steps you need to make the best better.

A Salute to My Beloved 4-H Leader,

Ma Quick

Jo Ann Smith Trail – Virginia

Mrs. Faye Nelson Quick, fondly known as Ma Quick served generations of 4-H Club members in Augusta County located in the heart of Virginia’s Shenandoah Valley. This is a salute to her, these many years later. Her love and legacy live on.

4-H club work started in Augusta County in 1917. Ma Quick first became acquainted with 4-H club work when she and her family were invited by the Augusta County Agent to attend a 4-H Club picnic on May 24, 1924. She had 2 children who were old enough to start 4-H work, so they all left the picnic enthusiastic and ready to go.

Ma Quick’s first task as a 4-H leader was to take children around to the different 4-H club meetings as there were not clubs in all of the communities in the early days. Later she began to fill in at clubs which had lost their leaders. During this time, she served as cook, nurse and chief bottle washerat one of the first county 4-H camps, Camp May Flather near Stokesville.

Years later, when there was danger of a nearby dam breaking, she was among those evacuated from Camp May Flather. She had the task of helping move forty 4-H campers to higher ground. With stomachs full of hot dogs, everyone boarded a school bus but were stopped by water already on a bridge. The bridge was crossed on foot, one at a time, holding onto guide ropes for safety. When all had reached the other side to reboard a bus, they looked back to see the bridge was fully submerged. Everyone had to sleep in the school bus that night, on top of the mountain, but they were safe!The dam held, but the camp and bridge were washed away. The next day they had to hike 6 miles to be rescued. Families had been frantic, not knowing how their children had fared.Ma added a new part to her job description of chief comforter and soother.

In 1964 Ma was honored for her 40 plus years as a 4-H Club leader at a county picnic attended by 150 people. She didn’t receive a 40 year pin, because no one had ever served that long and there was no pin to give. State 4-H Agent Jack Tyree praised her as an adult radiating leadership that sparks the best from youngsters. He stated that she gave her life away and, in the process, made a real contribution to mankind. The rewards were not material awards, but the more satisfactory kind, such as watching youngsters under her guidance grow into respected citizens.

By her own admission, Mamaintained that young people were a hobby all my life,pointing out that her philosophy always had been to make the children work if they are going to get credit for it.Ma would not do for us what she thought we could and should do for ourselves.

She was considered the Dean of 4-H leaders and was instrumental in establishing an effective state adult leader’s conference. It was a proud moment when she became the first 4-H leader to be inducted into the Augusta County and State 4-H All Star Organization as honorary member.

Not only was she fun to be around but she was also very organized and able. She instilled these qualities into her 4-H club members and was a positive influence on so many generations of Virginia 4-Hers. Well done and thank you, Ma Quick.

People and Relationships

Jessica Tanner – Michigan

4-H has been a part of my life for as long as I can remember. My love of animals, passion for people, and the desire to work hard have been the driving force behind my 4-H career. Though my time in 4-H is almost over, I know that the memories I made and the lessons I learned will stay with me for a lifetime.

I started in 4-H by training one of my family’s dogs, then eventually taking her to the fair when I was nine years old. Little Polly, a German Shepherd/Cocker Spaniel mix, was so much fun to train, especially in agility. Five years later, I was given my Australian Shepherd, Sydney, who I was able to take to the State 4-H Dog Show at Michigan State University.

One of the funniest memories I had at the State Dog show was when I took Sydney into our Intermediate Agility class. We had been waiting for what seemed like hours for our turn. Sydney kept looking at me, pleading with her big copper eyes to go play in that big open space with all the fun jumps and tunnels. We watched team after team run the course. I could have memorized the course without walking it after watching so many others run it! As we neared the front of the line, I could feel the anticipation welling up inside me. Sydney seemed to feel it, too. The three handlers in front of us all had pretty small dogs who took their sweet time running through the course. Even Sydney looked as though she was saying, Really? That is as fast as you can go? Finally, the moment came. It was our turn. I gave the ring assistant my leash and told Sydney to sit and wait while I took a few steps forward to get ready to tell her to go. The crowd was sitting in quiet anticipation, thinking, Surely, THIS is the dog that will give us a show! Sydney’s whole body was tensed and ready to go, waiting for my signal. LET’S GO! I yelled as Sydney and I took off. OVER! She flew over the first jump beautifully, as did she on the second jump. The whole crowd let out an excited Whoop! They were going to get the show they came to see! It was after these first two jumps that we had to turn to the right and head toward a tunnel. However… Sydney had another idea. Rather than following my cues, she decided it would be great fun to continue running straight and right into the open door of the trailer that had carried in all the agility equipment! The crowd, who had been watching the equivalent of an action movie, was now watching a comedy unfold as a rather frustrated fifteen-year-old called and called for her ADHD dog to come back and finish the course. Eventually, Sydney got bored with the trailer and decided to come back and finish her job. We did not place, but we came away with a great story! Granted, it is much more humorous in hindsight than it was in the moment. Isn’t that how all great stories are, though?

While I was showing dogs, I had the opportunity to show other four-legged creatures, including horses and swine. Horses are my passion, but I have had a lot of fun with the pigs. I have learned so much about winning and losing with grace and humility. I have also had fantastic opportunities to help out my little 4-H buddies. One little girl in particular will forever warm my heart.

That sweet little redhead had never been close to pigs until we brought them home in the spring. She had not done too much work with her pig during the summer, mainly because she was too scared to get close. Of course, her pig was the one that had escaped the day we brought it home and spent a couple hours being chased through the woods by some very dedicated 4-H parents and leaders. After that experience, the pig was never quite right in the head. It squealed the loudest and longest and scared its little redheaded handler to death! The time came for the little girl to step into the show ring with her crazy pig and all the other Cloverbuds, but she did not want to go in. The barn helpers had gotten her pig out, the pig screaming and squealing the whole time. This scared the girl so much she was left standing in front her pig pen in tears. I walked up to her and hugged her, asking her if she would like to go show her pig now. She shook her head side to side, her ponytail nearly smacking me in the face as she did. I then asked her if she would like it if I went into the show pen with her. To that, she slowly nodded her head, so I took her hand and walked her over to the pen before she had time to change her mind.

Her pig was already in the pen, running around like the red demon it was. We were able to walk over to it and, with slow and gentle movements of the cane, were able to get the pig under control. With every step she took, I could feel the little girl’s confidence growing. I let go of her hand, and eventually stopped following her. She kept walking along on her own, not even noticing I was gone as she continued to guide her pig. When she did notice, she looked around wildly for me, panic flashing in her eyes. She spotted me, but I stayed where I was and told her she was okay. She took a deep breath and went back to showing her pig with the confidence of ten men. No fear took over as she wiggled her way in between pigs, giving her own pig a good smack every now and then when it would stop to root in the dirt. By that time, I had walked out of the show pen to let her finish the work herself. She did such an amazing job, and I was bursting at the seams with pride in what she had accomplished.

Although I have left many show pens and arenas with ribbons, medals, trophies, and plaques, 4-H to me means more than all of those. 4-H is about people and relationships. Without someone’s encouraging words after a loss, I would not have the strength to step back into the ring the next time. Something I have had to learn through my years in 4-H is that no matter whether I win or lose, there is always somebody younger and more impressionable watching me and wanting to be like me. How I act and carry myself will impact them in ways I will never know. This is not to sound all high-and-mighty. It is a huge responsibility, and it is so worth it to me. Though I may be finishing up my showing career in 4-H next year, I am in no way going to stop being involved in people’s lives. We cannot be afraid to come alongside someone else and encourage them. Who knows? Maybe we will learn something from it.

Special 4-H Friends and Families

4-H A Family Thing

Judy Furr – North Carolina

The Furr Family involvement in 4-H actually began in Mecklenburg County.

One Sunday in church, Terri Cline, a young woman we knew, approached our daughter, Kelly, and asked if she would like to join the 4-H club she working with. Kelly said she would like that, but would need permission from her parents. Terri explained that she had been an active 4-Her when she lived and Florida and asked our permission for Kelly to join her club. In 1979, Kelly became a member of the Mallard Creek 4-H Club.

The following year, Kelly’s brother, Robbie joined the Mallard Creek 4-H Club. Kelly was encouraged to work on a dairy foods presentation. As she was presenting, Pam Outen, one of the Cabarrus County 4-H agents, was sitting in the room. She was shocked to see a young girl from Cabarrus County representing Mecklenburg County in the Dairy Foods category.

When Mrs. Outen returned home, she immediately told David Goff, her coworker, about the experience. They had been thinking about starting a club in the Harrisburg area, and now they put it on the fast track. In October 1980, an informational meeting was held at Harrisburg School. JoAnn and Tommy Lowder, leaders of the Flowes Store 4-H Club came and shared their experiences with the adults. Their daughters, Lynne and Sharon shared their experiences and brought some of their projects and fashion revue items to share. (The Lowders and Furrs are still friends today). Several parents signed up as leaders, including my husband Robert and me. We also had a good number of children to sign up as 4-H members.

Since Kelly had 4-H experience, she was elected as the first club president.

Kelly and Robbie were very active in the club and on county level. They both worked on project records, presentations and the fashion revue. Their younger sister Nanci, also joined the club when she became nine years old.

Kelly was able to attend NJHA with her state winning Fruits and Vegetables presentation in 1985. She was named a national winner in Fruits and Vegetable use. She was also named Grand National winner in the foods demonstration use category.

Robbie attended NJHA with his state winning Fruits and Vegetables presentation in 1987. Mr. Larry Bass recognized potential in Robbie and invited him to attend North Carolina Junior Horticultural Association prior to NJHA. He then encouraged Robbie to become an officer. Robbie was named a national winner in the Fruits and Vegetables use category. He was elected to serve as the South region Director for NJHA for 1988-1989.

In 1988, Robbie, was named a national winner in The Speaking of Horticulture Contest. Robbie was elected to serve as the Central region Director for NJHA for 1989-1990. As a regional director, he served on the planning committee for the next NJHA Conference.

Kelly was named a state winner with her Dairy Foods cumulative record and Robbie was named a state winner with his Fruits and Vegetables cumulative record. Nanci was named a state runner-up with her Safety cumulative record. All three were able to attend National 4-H Congress in Ohio (different years)

Kelly attended UNC Chapel Hill. The 4-H Collegiate Club was inactive, so she reactivated it. They worked on service projects and at times joined ranks with NC State’s Collegiate Club. Kelly also planned and organized a trip to the National 4-H Collegiate Conference in Texas.

As leaders Robert and I kept busy working with our own children and well as the other club members. The Harrisburg Helpers 4-H club was so active in all phases of 4-H, we were intimidating to prospective club members and leaders. Two very special leaders who spent a lot of time working with our club were Jeannette Cole and Joan Lewis. Joan was our sewing specialist. Robert and I worked on the original budget committee for the Cabarrus County 4-H program and I am currently treasurer of the Cabarrus 4-H Foundation.

Robert enjoyed serving as a chaperone when the kids went to 4-H camp. He phased out as a leader but was always there to make sure the children were able to get to meetings when I was at work. I was honored to be inducted into the NC Hall of Leadership.

Kelly was hired to work in DC in 1992 and has lived in Virginia ever since. She married Marc Cohen and together they have a daughter Amanda. Kelly began volunteering with the Fairfax County, VA 4-H and when Amanda was old enough, she started a 4-H club for Amanda and her friends. With Amanda’s commitment to dance increasing, she began phasing out of 4-H. Kelly has been working with the Fairfax County 4-H fair for several years and that is now the extent of her involvement in 4-H. She and Marc travel a lot with Amanda as she is strongly involved with competitive dancing.

Nanci is now serving her second term on the three-year NC Congress planning committee. She has served as a 4-H chaperone many times. She is also a leader with the Flowes Store 4-H Club. Taylor, her oldest