Wild Existence

By Jacob Smith

Hi there! I know you know my name because it’s on the cover or I begged you to read my book, but it’s weird to talk about myself while introducing myself. So yeah, my name is Jake, and I wrote a poetry book. Now for stuff you might not know, I’m a twenty-four-year old guy who decided writing and publishing a poetry book was way cheaper than regular therapy. Although this is definitely no alternative for professional help, I do enjoy it a little more and hope this either can find you in good spirits or will help you get there. Although the main reason for this book was to help me deal with the beautifully messed up world I live in, it would help my ego to know if you liked it or if it helped you! Anyway, these poems mainly center on events and feelings that I’ve had, witnessed, or fantasized. Besides the first and last poem, they are written in order so you should be able to see how impulsive I am and see me come into certain writing styles.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Xlibris US
• Release date: Dec 2, 2020
• ISBN: 9781664145382

Jacob Smith

Jacob Smith is Assistant Professor in the Department of Radio-Television-Film at Northwestern University and is the author of Vocal Tracks: Performance and Sound Media (UC Press).

Book preview

Copyright © 2020 by Jacob Smith.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the copyright owner.

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Getty Images are models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

Certain stock imagery © Getty Images.

Rev. date: 12/01/2020

Xlibris

844-714-8691

www.Xlibris.com

820120

CONTENTS

When I Open My Eyes And See You

A Sugar-Coated Town

And a Crimson City

A Happy Funeral

Aquaman

We Feed the Birds

Yellow Headlights

An Entry Clearly Written while Listening to Jaden Smith (temp title)

Burning

Bonnie and Clyde

Cast Away

Brick by Brick

A Brave New World

Falling

I Drink to Forget

The Wrong Swing Set

Jerimiah 11:11

The Minotaur

Suburban Olympians

Pompeii

Meeting Persephone

Frozen Nights

Crash

Wedding Bells Ring

Ghost

Failure Fires

What Creeps in the Night

I’d Sink Us to Swim

Cotton Candy Clouds

The Sun Also Sets

How to Get Free Snacks

The Sailor

A Pep Talk with the Other Voice in My Head

Date Night

Caught in a Thunderstorm

Sunny Day Shadow

An Empty Ballroom

A Drunken Stupor

The Fire and the Flood

Me

Daylight

Russian Roulette

White Caps

Bedtime Stories

Disconnected

Adventure Land

Petrified Pendant

Devil with a Ripped Dress (Yikes, my parents can’t read this one!)

Alzheimer’s

Distant Voices

The Composer

Ups and Downs

The Woods (Episode 9)

Dream Girl

Cherry Red

Swallowed Whole

Living in the Moment

No Survivors

Call Out Your Name (A Magician’s Final Trick)

The Moon

The One

Cravings

Swamp Thing

On the Kitchen Floor

Drunk Dial

Midnight Meadows (Burble)

Those Nights

Endings

Defense Mechanisms

Thunderstruck

Pink

Home

Three Kings

So I Tried Tinder

Espresso Shots

Hardware Store’s Return Policy

Wild Existence

A Creation Story

I Befriend a Blizzard

Flower Boy

The Missed Call

The Mirror

Statue

Eve

Bomb Shelter

W(hole)

Day Job

Kids in a Museum

Dawn

How I Feel about My Poems

Sunburn

Senior Skip Day

Reckless

Syre

Erys

Silver Screen Solace

Senseless Sleep

I Do

Sandcastles

Rooftop Requiem

Finally, A Real Pep Talk

Sugar Water

Demons

Blinded by the Light

Target Practice

Dad

Cain

11:39 pm

Bewilderment

The Black Swan

Be Bold or Be Boring

In Between

Specks

Venus

Faith

Luminous Limerence

Jonah

Worth

Unfinished Business

Staying on Track

Goodbye, Hello

Head in the Clouds

The Meteorologist

Thief

Let’s Sleep on It

Yellow

Ruins

And When She Looked Back at Me

WHEN I OPEN MY EYES

AND SEE YOU

I look into her eyes and see forest fires and fields of flowers

meeting in perfect harmony. A glimpse of the million worlds

that hide behind them can be seen in the distance whenever

she daydreams. Pools of passion drop from them, and my heart

quakes. It’s never seen such power emitted from such a soft

source. Heaven’s haven can be felt in the warmth of her smile,

a planet without a star until you’ve seen it. Her rose-petal lips

produce thoughts I was incapable of ever coming up with

in my own lifetime. Like colors I’ve never seen before, I try to

wrap my head around them. What a life to face this face when

I awake. My world begins and ends looking at you, and I plan

to use every moment in between those points to cherish her.

A SUGAR-COATED TOWN

Nostalgic eyes cherish the trees I’ve watched grow up as I walk

through my old town. They’ve changed as much as I have; it’s

a miracle we recognize each other. I let time run rampant since

I’d seen them last; the fear of the situations I ran from kept me

away. As if coming back to this place would instantly void the

progress I’ve made. The mixed emotions swirl in my stomach,

giving me an uncomfortable happiness. The past hits like a car

accident; my skin wants to run and get help, while my heart

can’t look away from it. Confrontation is the first step to closure;

I’m not who I was. Even though waterfalls of memories splash

down on me, I don’t drown in the feelings they bring anymore.

The trees watch as I take my first breath. The air tastes sweet

in this town, a weird fact I never noticed when I lived here.

AND A CRIMSON CITY

Carnivals don’t come to this city; they can’t compete in wonder.

Characters populate the streets with stories and reasons that I’ve

never heard of before. Listening to them all would be impossible,

but each one comes with a new perspective you can daydream

about later. Bastards and flowers bloom here, and both get the

same level of appreciation. A safe haven for individuality and

the founder of acceptance. Nights feel more important here;

the weight of living can be brushed away. Without its anchor,

my heart floats up, ready to enjoy sparkling moments that this

crimson city promises. One day I will outgrow this place, but its

fire will always be remembered. Happily burned in my brain,

the party can constantly flicker whenever I think back on it.

A HAPPY FUNERAL

There’s been a murder, I didn’t know it yet, but I watched myself

decay until I was no longer myself. Struck with the poisonous

idea to strive for happiness, the old me couldn’t survive. He

grew sickly, positivity radiating throughout and becoming

cancerous. I’d stay up late at night coughing up blood and

turmoil that my body no longer accepted. The process was

horrifying and painful, change is a hard pill to swallow, and I

choked on a couple of occasions. I felt the old me’s death, with

no idea who I was without him; my perception mimicked an

out-of-body experience. Free to look upon myself, I vowed

to be better. I buried him in the yard; though no tears were

shed, I understood his purpose and thanked him for all he

did. Through pain, I earned myself a second chance; I will

not mess this opportunity up. A phoenix burns to heal.

AQUAMAN

Events pass me until I’m dizzy, stumbling through someone

else’s party. People shout my name from every direction, and its

repetition makes the word sound unfamiliar. Drowning in the

sound and breathing slow to control my ever-moving perception,

I find myself outside. The only constant among the flashing

colors is the light blue emitted off the pool; it’s seemingly a rare

ability to be simplistic, forces me to fixate on it for comfort. With

stimuluses exploding at the seams of my mind, I jump in; the

cool water muffles the sound. Time slows as I sink, looking up

at the overly-detailed world slowly blurring into a bubbly dark

blue oblivion. I know my time here is short, but I treasure it like

it would never end. Every moment, an individual gem that my

greedy heart collects. With oxygen depleted, I know I need to

return, but suddenly, a crash hits the surface of the water and

shoots directly at me. Never thinking the calm could break down

here, I’m taken aback. I reactively gasp for air; with way more

surprise than I could comprehend, I didn’t choke. With full focus

on my new ability, I never