The Beauty of Chastity: Purity Revolution

By Ev. Paul Mukendi

A woman had been caught in the act of adultery, and she was brought to Jesus. While Jesus dealt with the sensitive issue of sexual sins, he did not speak loudly and make a long sermon, but quietly wrote it down. Sometimes honest words that are of a sensitive nature should rather be written down than said. We are aware that sexual matters are not comfortable topics to deal with, as most people treat them with social stigmas, yet we must be diligent to address them thoroughly with the help of the Holy Spirit. These teachings might make someone feel uncomfortable, yet they are one of the most noteworthy teachings of the Bible. The extent and variety of sexual sins are rapidly increasing in our sophisticated societies, so the need has arisen to present sound biblical teachings on sexuality. Many people may find themselves victims of sexual sins because they are ignorant. Hence, the Bible says, “you will know the truth, and truth shall set you free.” The purpose of these teachings is not to embarrass anyone, but to help people discover the truth. This book on chastity seeks to help both married and single people find the necessary motivation to pursue sexual purity in a perverted world, it addresses many sexual problems and objections frequently found in our society. Young people, for whom this book was mainly written, are shown how to live the charisma of virginity and celibacy charismatically — that is as a gift, in all humility, with joy and perfect freedom.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Partridge Publishing Singapore
• Release date: Jan 7, 2020
• ISBN: 9781543755886

Ev. Paul Mukendi

Paul Mukendi is a graduate in Nursing Science. He is a passionate evangelist of the Gospel, and he has been serving the Lord Jesus Christ since the age of fifteen. He has completed various Bible studies. He has learned to understand the scriptures through the power of the Holy Spirit.

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Copyright © 2020 by Ev. Paul Mukendi.

ISBN:       Softcover             978-1-5437-5587-9

                 eBook                   978-1-5437-5588-6

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Unless otherwise stated, Scripture quotations are taken from the Holy Bible, New International Version,

KJV

Scripture quotations marked KJV are from the Holy Bible, King James Version (Authorized Version). First published in 1611. Quoted from the KJV Classic Reference Bible, Copyright © 1983 by The Zondervan Corporation.

NIV

Scripture quotations marked NIV are taken from the Holy Bible, New International Version®. NIV®. Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by International Bible Society. Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved. [Biblica]

ESV

The ESV® Bible (The Holy Bible, English Standard Version®) copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers. The ESV® text has been reproduced in cooperation with and by permission of Good News Publishers. Unauthorized reproduction of this publication is prohibited. All rights reserved.

ISV

The Holy Bible: International Standard Version® Release 2.1 Copyright © 1996-2012 The ISV Foundation. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED INTERNATIONALLY.

CEV

Contemporary English Version, Second Edition (CEV®) © 2006 American Bible Society. All rights reserved. Learn more at www.cev.bible. Discover. BIBLE resources for your ministry at www.get.bible/cev

NLT

Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

Main biblical passages

Let the one who does what is evil continue to do what is evil. Let the filthy person continue to be filthy. Let the righteous person continue to do what is right. And let the holy person continue to be holy. See! I am coming soon! My reward is with me to repay everyone according to his behaviour. Revelation 22: 11-12 (ISV).

Brothers do not be children in your thinking. Be infants in evil, but in your thinking be mature. 1 Corinthians 14: 20 (ESV).

CONTENTS

Acknowledgments

Dedication

Foreword

Introduction

Chapter 1     Intensity of Romantic Love

Chapter 2     Myths and misconceptions about sexuality

Chapter 3     God’s Standard of Sexuality

Chapter 4     Premarital Chastity (Abstinence Before Marriage)

Chapter 5     The virtue of Virginity

Chapter 6     Celibacy in the lord – commitment to singleness

Chapter 7     Chastity in marriage

Chapter 8     Sinful sexual practices (reproaches from the Holy Spirit)

Chapter 9     Flee from sexual immorality

Chapter 10     Conflicts between biological identity and gender identity

Chapter 11   Sexual abominations

Chapter 12   Deliverance from sexual addiction

Chapter 13   Victory over sin

Chapter 14   Grace without faith is a disgrace

List Of References

About The Author

ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

F irst all, I would like to express my sincere gratitude to Jesus Christ through Whom I can do all things. This book addresses the tough topic of chastity and sexual purity. Working on this work was an uneasy and challenging task for me. I could not have started the work, persevered with it, and finally publish it without God’s generous support. Special thanks to my lovely mother Mukaya Cecile who has always encouraged me to serve God. To my father Paul Mukendi who has been like an angel of the Lord to guide me in this world. I am particularly thankful to Kenneth Collins who has done the excellent work of proofreading this book

DEDICATION

W hether you are married or single, man or woman, student or employee, young or old, I hope this book helps you to find the necessary motivation to pursue chastity no matter the sexual temptations.

FOREWORD

I t is my humble belief that a man should follow what he preaches. It is easy to say the right things but difficult to live them out. A sermon becomes powerful when a messenger becomes a message to the audience. Jesus was the perfect example of his teachings; He began by doing what He taught. His teachings were sequential to His actions. Obedience is greater than sacrifice; likewise, actions speak louder than words. You who teach others, why don’t you teach yourself? While you preach against stealing, do you steal? Why are you so concerned about the speck in your friend’s eye, when you yourself fail to see the plank in your own eye? It is a vain effort to preach holiness while living in sin. If we don’t practice what we teach, our message becomes worthless. As for myself, I keep a close watch on how I live and the teaching I preach. I strive by God’s grace to practice what I teach for the sake of my own salvation and the salvation of those who hear me. I hold myself accountable to God for what I preach.

I have been many times confronted about my attitude toward sexuality. Life is made up of an infinite amount of choices. We are the direct outcomes of our own choices. Chastity is a pious choice-lifestyle. Since my childhood, I have observed a chaste life, not to say that I was not tempted—far from that. I was indeed tempted, yet I chose to remain faithful to God. When looking back on my past academic life at nursing college, I studied for three years as the only guy among female students. Many female students started to show interest in me as I was the only guy in the classroom. I disciplined myself deeply, though at the time I had many occasions to misbehave and sleep around with loads of girls. I have learned to develop self-control and pursue a chaste life despite negative influences from my colleagues and peers. I was the kind of person who could present any plausible excuse to run away from sexual sins.

I don’t think many, if not all of us, like it when others brag about their lives. I don’t want to boast of myself as if I am holier than anyone, but I have to set an example of Biblical teaching. I put no confidence in my flesh, and I have no reason to glorify in my strength, but God’s grace empowers me to overcome all sexual temptations. God has saved us and called us to a holy life, not because of anything we have done but because of His own purpose and grace. Praise be to God who enables us to be holy just as He is Holy.

In this book, I challenge you to pursue sexual purity in a perverted world. God has called you to be a light in the darkness and to stay holy in a sinful world. Without exception, I am concerned with this message as much as you are. We both stand on equal footing, let us discover the way of purity. I’m not any better than anyone. I’m just trying to convince people to live by the standards of what is right. I should just tell you from the outset that this book may stir up all kinds of responses, but if you become upset or annoyed let us put our differences aside and fight to restore sexual purity in our society. Let’s not be afraid to talk about what God was not afraid to create. In fact, let’s talk about it openly, but courteously.

INTRODUCTION

I n the Old Testament, God overlooked sinful sexual practices such as homosexuality, fornication, polygamy, concubinage, cohabitation and divorce in order to achieve the purpose of the law. Mosaic Law was given to reveal the sins of people. God’s law was given so that all people could see how sinful they were. But as people sinned more and more, God’s wonderful grace became more abundant. Mosaic Law clearly shows that it is impossible to please God with our own deeds. The purpose of the law was to expose the hidden wickedness of the human heart. The law revives the awareness of sin in the mind; it creates guilt and proves that every human being is sinful. The purpose of the law is to keep people from having excuses about their sins, so that every mouth may be silenced and the whole world held accountable and guilty before God. Sins are hidden without the law; hence no guilt and no repentance are needed. The law was not given to save people, but to increase transgression in the world. But where sin abounds, grace abounds more exceedingly. Law proves how people need grace and it points to Jesus Christ as the only way of salvation.

Now those who have received grace in Christ should no longer live according to the sinful ways of the Old Testament. Grace delivers us from the slavery of sin so that we may live in righteousness. The power of God’s grace in Christ Jesus gives us victory over sin, so that we may live in holiness. Sin shall no longer be our master, because we are not under the law, but under grace. Sin has lost its power over those who are in Christ. We should not indulge in homosexuality, fornication, polygamy, concubinage, cohabitation, divorce and any other sexual immorality as the people of old but walk as children of light. God commands His children to have dominion over sin and rule over the sinful passions of the flesh. The purpose of grace is to set us free from the power of sin and death. Living a life of victory over sins requires divine grace. Grace was manifested through Christ Jesus to set us free from the power and slavery of sin. God’s grace enables us to triumph over and repel all kinds of sexual temptations. This book on chastity seeks to help both married and single people find the necessary motivation to pursue sexual purity in a perverted world, it addresses many sexual problems and objections frequently found in our society. Young people, for whom this book was mainly written, are shown how to live the charisma of virginity and celibacy charismatically — that is as a gift, in all humility, with joy and perfect freedom. God’s grace saves you from the grave.

Chapter 1

INTENSITY OF ROMANTIC LOVE

A sense of belonging is a fundamental human need, just like the need for food and shelter. The feeling of being recognised and accepted is very important in maintaining well-being and in coping with painful emotions. Neuroscience tells us that love is a mammalian drive, like thirst. Everyone longs for love and will do almost anything to be loved and connected to others. It is true that to love and be loved are probably the two most important things in life. Loving and being loved adds richness to our existence. When people feel close to others, they are happier and healthier. We may look tough on the outside, but inside we are just little souls that cry out for love. We cannot change our nature—that’s the way God made us. All human beings, regardless of their age and social status, have the same fundamental need for love. It does not matter whether we are poor or rich, we all have a great need for approval and acceptance. We will do all things possible and constantly try to improve ourselves in order to be liked. Love is a wonderful thing. One of the strongest affiliations among humans is a romantic relationship . Romantic love is an emotional feeling and a strong attraction towards a specific person, and the courtship behaviours undertaken by an individual to express those overall feelings. Romantic love usually exists in an intimate relationship between a man and a woman. It involves a mix of emotional and intimate desires for another person. Although the sensations of romantic love are widely associated with erotic attraction, romantic feelings can exist without expectation of sexual consummation.

What ultimately draws two individuals of different gender exclusively to each other with such romantic power? We can say with certainty that human beings form romantic relationships because of their sexual drive. There are two major impulses in sexual drive, namely sexual attraction and attachment.

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1. Sexual attraction

Romantic love develops between opposite genders because of sexual attraction. In physics, Coulomb’s law tells us that positive and negative charges attract. This analogy can be applied to human behaviour, such as the attraction of opposite genders. Men and women are attracted to each other just as positive and negative charges are pulled towards each other in nature. People are drawn together by a force called romantic attraction, which is a combination of genetic and cultural factors. This force may be weak or strong and may be felt to different degrees by each of the two partners. Love works like a magnet, and romantic attraction may be described as a magnetic force that attracts males and females to each other like metallic objects. The magnetic field is a field that passes through space and makes a magnetic force move electric charges. In simple terms, the magnetic field is the area around a magnet in which there is magnetic force. Magnetism cannot operate outside the field. A bar magnet attracts iron objects placed within its magnetic field. The closer iron objects are to the magnet, the stronger the magnetic force between them. Similarly, romantic attraction can only happen when two individuals live within accessible closeness. Romantic force can only develop when individuals live within acceptable space. Bringing two people together is best way to trigger romantic love. Romantic attraction cannot develop without acceptable romantic proximity. People who meet frequently have a greater probability of developing stronger romantic attractions than those who don’t. The best way to avoid falling in love is by creating distance. Distance is the greatest enemy of love. Romantic attraction fades away when distance is formed between two individuals. The law of proximity is a gestalt principle of organization holding that objects or events that are near to one another (in space or time) are perceived as belonging together as a unit. Love requires proximity to form unity. Therefore, there is no love without closeness. Salvation could not occur if God did not become flesh. God manifested His great love towards us in this way: He sent His only son, Jesus Christ, into the world so that we may live through him. Jesus’s incarnation is the perfect manifestation of divine love. Love requires proximity to become effective. The Word became flesh and dwelt among men in order to reconcile them with God. Man can become a son of God because the son of God was made human. Christ’s grace brings divinity and humanity together, making salvation