Needless to Say

By Fabian M.C. Kuykendall

Needless to Say is a continuation of my first book, Man of Few Words. It chronicles my journey over the last five years with poetry, songs, essays, and short stories. This book contains more universal themes than the previous one. It covers topics such as politics, religion, race relations, psychology, philosophy, and popular culture, among others. The irony of the title stems from the fact that things that are claimed to be needless to say, somehow need to be said.

Most of the universal themes of this book are attributed to the series of albums (chapters), The Global Times. These albums allowed me to take the lens off of myself, and to focus on the state of the world. For the first time as a writer, I felt like I was actually doing important work. I felt as if I had the power to change the way people think and, in turn, change the world with the use of my words. The pieces in these particular albums are what I most want readers to take in. For me, theyve offered immeasurable creative and personal growth.

Since completing my last book, Ive had a number of other significant personal achievements. I moved from Milwaukee to Madison to attend Madison Media Institute, where I studied in their Recording and Music Technology program. I maintained a perfect GPA and perfect attendance, and was also named to the Deans List for all four semesters. I graduated in September of 2014, and received an associate degree.

While attending Madison Media Institute, I developed skills in audio engineering, mixing, producing, sound design, post-production editing, and even video editing. Although I initially went to school for music, I fell in love with this newfound process of video editing, and began to pursue it as a career. With almost no experience, I was able to hustle my way to an internship at a local television station in Madison. There, I was a camera operator for different segments shot throughout the city, and I was also a floor director for a promotional talk program. I worked as an intern for three months while maintaining another part-time job, and still attending school.

After my internship, I was offered a position as an independent contractor with the station. They gave me the opportunity to shoot and edit some of the local shows, and even a commercial. During this time, I was also paid to do a side project editing an online interview show for an aspiring broadcast host. I worked at the station for another three months before work opportunities began to dry up there, and I moved on. While I thoroughly appreciated the opportunity and experience they gave me, my passion began to shift once again.

I rediscovered my love for music, and I started putting into it all of my time and effort. I wrote songs and created instrumental compositions for recording. I worked with other artists to sing and record demos of my music, and I even sang most of the demos myself. Ultimately, I created an EP of music that showcases all of the skills I learned in school. Its a professional tool that I plan to use to work my way into the music industry, and fulfill my purpose as a songwriter and producer.

After two long years in Madison, Im finally ready to move back to my hometown of Milwaukee. Ive accomplished a lot, and now Im armed with the skills to accomplish more than was possible before. Throughout this recent journey, Ive worked tirelessly on what will be my next big accomplishment, this book. It is something I want to be remembered for as it contains (almost) everything I want to say before I die. Needless to say, it needs to be said.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Xlibris US
• Release date: Aug 31, 2015
• ISBN: 9781503598751

Fabian M.C. Kuykendall

Fabian M.C. Kuykendall was born and raised in Milwaukee, Wisconsin. Despite dropping out of high school, he is a proud college graduate. He earned an associate degree at Madison Media Institute, where he studied audio engineering, editing, and production. He is also an experienced videographer and video editor. He discovered his passion for writing at the age of fourteen. Growing up in foster homes and battling depression led him to poetry, which gave him an outlet to creatively express himself. He’s been writing for seventeen years now, and plans to create novels and write screenplays in the future. He is currently a courier, striving for a career as a professional songwriter and producer.

Book preview

Copyright © 2015 by Fabian M.C. Kuykendall.

Library of Congress Control Number:   2015913259

ISBN:   Hardcover   978-1-5035-9874-4

            Softcover      978-1-5035-9876-8

        eBook            978-1-5035-9875-1

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the copyright owner.

Rev. date: 08/24/2015

Xlibris

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Contents

Preface

Chapter XX

Venti

Poetic Thoughts

The Labyrinth

Define Me

Contradiction Of War

Cerulean Soul

Stop This Train!

Air Sign

Destroy Myself

Find Me

Redemption

The Day After I Die

Demoniac

Insomnia (Still Awake)

The Chronicle Iii

Angelfish

Sensitive Eyes

The Doldrums

Nocturne

Deliverance

On The Verge

Chapter XXI

The Global Times Vol. I

White Nigga

Abortion

The Fame

Immigrant

What Would You Do?

Mockery Of Democracy

Differences

The Walls Of Polygamy

Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell

Recession

Cyborg Society

At Gunpoint

Voiceless

The American Scheme

Calendar’s End

Chapter XXII

Dogmata

Dogmata

Godless

Losing My Religion

New Religion

Under The Guise Of The Church

Blasphemy

The Hereafter

Presence Of God

Amen

Enlightenment

Righteous And The Wicked

Black Sabbath

Chapter XXIIi

Psych Sessions

My Psychology

Psychoamorous

Subconsciously Speaking

The Id

Psychosis (2011)

Psychosocial : The Cycle Of Psych

The Psyche (Psychology Reversed)

Psycho Path

The Path Of Pathology

Dichotomy Of The Brain

Chapter XXIV

The Global Times Vol. Ii

Idle Worship

The Way Of The Gay

B. S. (Bully Syndrome)

Abused : A Victim’s Excuse

Position Of Power

Billionaire (What Is Your Worth?)

Book Of Faces

Other

Blackface

Don’t Be Stupid

Reality Check

The Problem Is…

Dystopia

Chapter XXV

Poetic Thoughts Iv

Cursed With Empathy

Window Blinds

Thirsty

Too Easy

White Flag

Illusion

You Never Know

Virgin

Chasing Clocks

We Were

Already

The Incel

The Chronicle Iv

Exit 27

Chapter XXVI

Moonrise

Liberty’s Tears

Don’t Look At Me

Beautiful Death

The Angels

Crybaby Ego

Distant Moon

Life Happens

The Incubus

Melting Glass

Needless To Say

Goodnight

Scion

A Broken Analogy

Canvas

Sleep (Christ’s Lullaby)

City Of Festivals

Chapter XXVII

Ellipsis

Ellipsis : Infinite Thought

The White Room

Cipher

Spheres

The Thinker

Enlightenment : Metaphysical Existence

In The Conscious Of Nothingness

The Great Pyramid

Subterranean : In The Deep

Existentia

Chapter XXVIII

Made Of Me

Father

Soundwaves

Right Hand Man

Feed Me

Singing

El Shaddai

Saving Me

Labios

Soul Food

The Funnies

Chapter XXIX

The Global Times Vol. Iii

For Show

Race Card

Blame Hip-Hop

The ‘In’ Word

Playing God

What Is Cancer?

Visions

She

Power Of The Gun

P.c. (Popular Culture)

Tangled Web

Third World

Elephant In The Room

Giftmas

Chapter XXX

Pathos

Close My Eyes

Shame

Pitiful Me

The Lonely

I Lose

Ode To Sorrow

When Water Runs Dry

Pus

Purgatory

Too Late

In Effigy

Anathema

Chapter XXXI

Orange Tide

Bleeding Guitar

Pseudo Cool

Voices

Requiem

In The Dark

Do You Love Me Now?

Borrowing Bodies

Money Buys Everything

Fuck Me

The Sky Is Falling

Post Meridiem

My Heroine

Tempest

Chapter XXXII

Fictives

Tragically True

2

Foster Home

Blind Bird Swimming North

Perpetual Twilight : Reveries Of Dawn

Chapter XXXIII

Poetic Thoughts V

Comfort

Seizure

Invisible Darkness

Altered

My One

Hiding From The Sun

Everybody’s An Idiot (Except For You)

Front

Martyr

Centuries

Make Up With Life

Covenant

The Gray Area

Cyanide

Chapter XXXIV

Stream Of Conciousness

Hait

I Wish I Was Gay

Kill The Queen

Inkblot

White Noise

Peyote Vision

Taboo Cliché

When Curiosity Becomes Obsession

The Juxtaposition Of Black & White

Stream Of Consciousness

PREFACE

Needless To Say is a continuation of my first book, Man of Few Words. It chronicles my journey over the last five years with poetry, songs, essays, and short stories. This book contains more universal themes than the previous one. It covers topics such as politics, religion, race relations, psychology, philosophy, and popular culture, among others. The irony of the title stems from the fact that things that are claimed to be needless to say, somehow need to be said.

Most of the universal themes of this book are attributed to the series of albums (chapters), The Global Times. These albums allowed me to take the lens off of myself, and to focus on the state of the world. For the first time as a writer, I felt like I was actually doing important work. I felt as if I had the power to change the way people think and, in turn, change the world with the use of my words. The pieces in these particular albums are what I most want readers to take in. For me, they’ve offered immeasurable creative and personal growth.

Since completing my last book, I’ve had a number of other significant personal achievements. I moved from Milwaukee to Madison to attend Madison Media Institute, where I studied in their Recording and Music Technology program. I maintained a perfect GPA and perfect attendance, and was also named to the Dean’s List for all four semesters. I graduated in September of 2014, and received an associate degree.

While attending Madison Media Institute, I developed skills in audio engineering, mixing, producing, sound design, post-production editing, and even video editing. Although I initially went to school for music, I fell in love with this newfound process of video editing, and began to pursue it as a career. With almost no experience, I was able to hustle my way to an internship at a local television station in Madison. There, I was a camera operator for different segments shot throughout the city, and I was also a floor director for a promotional talk program. I worked as an intern for three months while maintaining another part-time job, and still attending school.

After my internship, I was offered a position as an independent contractor with the station. They gave me the opportunity to shoot and edit some of the local shows, and even a commercial. During this time, I was also paid to do a side project editing an online interview show for an aspiring broadcast host. I worked at the station for another three months before work opportunities began to dry up there, and I moved on. While I thoroughly appreciated the opportunity and experience they gave me, my passion began to shift once again.

I rediscovered my love for music, and I started putting into it all of my time and effort. I wrote songs and created instrumental compositions for recording. I worked with other artists to sing and record demos of my music, and I even sang most of the demos myself. Ultimately, I created an EP of music that showcases all of the skills I learned in school. It’s a professional tool that I plan to use to work my way into the music industry, and fulfill my purpose as a songwriter and producer.

After two long years in Madison, I’m finally ready to move back to my hometown of Milwaukee. I’ve accomplished a lot, and now I’m armed with the skills to accomplish more than was possible before. Throughout this recent journey, I’ve worked tirelessly on what will be my next big accomplishment, this book. It is something I want to be remembered for as it contains (almost) everything I want to say before I die. Needless to say, it needs to be said.

CHAPTER XX

VENTI

Italian for twenty, Venti is a celebration of my twentieth album of poetry. This chapter contains twenty pieces that represent the theme of each of these twenty albums. This was a reflective time that allowed me to see how far I’ve come in my life, and as a writer. This is chapter venti.

Poetic Thoughts

I’m green in a blue world of lyrical verse

With so many feelings I need to disperse

A sanction without any noetic laws

Release in releasing my poetic thoughts

A means of expression for what I suppose

Emotions pour out into poetic prose

The flood after taking a noetic pause

I find myself lost in my poetic thoughts

I’m naked and honest, exposed within words

My mind, soul and body divide into thirds

Exposure exposes my noetic flaws

As I write the words of my poetic thoughts

The silence is speaking the words that I write

I listen intently to what they recite

I’m freely exploiting my noetic cause

By giving a voice to my poetic thoughts

The Labyrinth

I’m lost in a labyrinth with a storm over my head

Desperately seeking an exit, but I’m hopelessly misled

With no way out, I’m left to wander vainly everyday

Inside this maze, I lose my will while trying to find my way

I’m trapped in an imbroglio that breaks me as I bend

An odyssey of solitude that’s never going to end

The lowest low I’ll ever know, a bottomless abyss

I might as well submit my will ’cause I can’t deal with this

A captive of confinement in this prison of binding walls

With endless miles of intricate, confusing winding halls

It’s like a tangled puzzle with no pieces taking shape

Large walls of rock, all doors are locked and there is no escape

This cruel perpetual punishment diminishes my soul

I’m serving a life sentence with no promise of parole

My odyssey continues as I wander and discern

An unexpected glimpse of hope is found at my next turn

I wandered upon a sylvan glade that seemed to welcome me

The sweetest song I’ve ever heard was coming from a tree

A lovely nymph was singing amidst a canopy of leaves

She sang my pain like falling rain; in sorrow’s nest, she grieves

Her hair, a river of onyx ribbons flowing down her back

I see her there behind the leaves so difficult to track

Her voice is so alluring as she sings there all alone

She sings with innate tenderness in such a soothing tone

So heartbreakingly beautiful is the echo of her song

A beautiful soul with a broken heart from pining for so long

This songbird is my lyrical muse, her spirit sings to me

I’m lost in thought… then I awaken from this reverie

I’m lost in a labyrinth with a storm over me head

Desperately seeking an exit, but I’m hopelessly misled

With no way out, I’m left to wander vainly everyday

Inside this maze, I lose my will while trying to find my way

This is my life in poetry, an unrelenting pain

A sad pluvial nightmare where my tears are used for rain

My odyssey continues as I trek around the bend

I die of melancholy as I find one more dead end

Define Me

Define me, design me

With labels, deride me

Judge me and give me a name to defy me

Give me your verdict as I’m under exam

Since you feel the need to tell me what I am

I’m a loner, a loser, reserved, unapproachable

Conservative, shy, antisocial, unsociable

Arrogant, stuck-up, conceited and rude

I’m hostile and mean with a bad attitude

Judgmental, meticulous, feminine, gay

I’m weird, I’m a square, I’m whatever you say

I object to your adjectives ’cause I’m something else

These words don’t define me, I define myself

I’m sensitive, spiritual, sated with good

Mysterious, guarded, I’m misunderstood

I’m strong, independent, resilient, unique

Intelligent, witty, artistic, oblique

Ambitious, anomalous, gifted and rare

I’m modest, I’m human, and now you’re aware

I reject your objective and objection of me

You can’t just make me what you want me to be

Define me, analyze me

With judgments, describe me

Diagnose me and fashion insults to prescribe me

Read me and see me for more than my sham

Before you decide to tell me what I am

Contradiction Of War

The world through my eyes is a beautiful guise

Won’t be long ’til the beauty is gone

The war that we fight, is it wrong? Is it right?

I don’t know, so which side am I on?

’Cause we’re fighting for peace

But there’s none ’til we cease

Even still if we win

Lives we lose in the end

What of us as the kin of these men?

As they go to battle, we’re battling in

This contradiction of war

The world