The Legendary Saga of Djinndom: Scenes 251-500

By Jahshua Divine Divini

The following is a fictional legend based on the lives of well known
members of society. They were not at all involved in the writing of this
script, and had no creative input whatsoever. The scenes described are
not, nor have they ever been real, according to the date of the scripts
completion. Their inclusion in this story is strictly for creative reasons and
in no way a portrayal of the nature of they who are included. All ideas
are from the author, and the involvement of well known persons is solely
circumstantial and for the sake of entertaining an audience.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Xlibris US
• Release date: Jun 17, 2015
• ISBN: 9781503545045

Book preview

251

On Elbow beach, Bermuda, Jahshua, Miranda, Jennette, Phoenix, and Ariana all lay out on beach chairs under sun umbrellas watching the rest of the warlocks play volleyball. The girls all wear bikinis. The boys wear trunks. Jennette is asleep. Ariana fans herself while talking to Phoenix. Jahshua plays with a remote control helicopter. Miranda watches him while drinking a pina colada.

Ariana: (To Phoenix.) So they make you beg and beg, but even when you do they refuse.

Phoenix: Exactly.

Ariana: They wished for forcefields against you?

Phoenix: That’s right.

Ariana: That’s messed up. Why don’t you just divorce them and take everything back?

Phoenix: They keep my heart in their lair.

Ariana: So.

Phoenix: Their lair is impenetrable.

Ariana: Sounds like you need a new mistress.

Phoenix: No, I like things the way they are. So there are no strings attached.

(Jahshua and Miranda are having a different conversation.)

Miranda: What time are we due in Nashville Josh?

Jahshua: Time is of no importance Mirry, but we will leave at sundown.

Miranda: How long is that?

Jahshua: We’ll be here for about nine more hours.

Miranda: Well you can put some sunscreen on me please.

Jahshua: Yes mistress.

(The helicopter and its remote disappear. Jahshua conjures sunscreen, and spreads it on Miranda’s legs before beginning to rub it in. Ariana and Phoenix continue.)

Phoenix: Look Ari, its not that I don’t want to be with you. I just don’t have my heart so I can’t put it into a relationship.

Ariana: Well how can we get your heart back then?

Phoenix: I would have to bargain for it.

Ariana: What is there reason for keeping it again?

Phoenix: I’m a genii. They are lesbian sirens. Why else would they keep me around? For my favors of course.

Ariana: So we get them a new genii. A lesbian genii.

Phoenix: Do you know any? Because I’ve never met one.

Ariana: Ask Josh. (To Jahshua.) Josh, do you know any lesbian genii?

Jahshua: Yes, I know of many.

Ariana: Any free ones?

Jahshua: Yes.

Ariana: (To Phoenix.) Go to your wives and ask them.

Phoenix: (Slightly annoyed.) Alright. (He disappears.)

(Jennette wakes up.)

Jennette: When’s lunch?

End

252

It is night at the Woods Amphitheater in Nashville. People are packed in and dancing to the Neon Phoenix while he DJs. After a while he ends his segment and disappears. The crowd cheers. Ariana appears on stage with a microphone. She speaks enthusiastically.

Ariana: Hello Nashville! Thank you for the warm welcome. Just for that I’m gonna sing you a song. Would you like that?

(The crowd cheers.)

Ariana: Alright! Where’s the band?

(The High Warlocks appear. Ariana sings. Cut back to Jahshua and Miranda on Elbow beach, making out in the water at night.)

Jahshua: Are you ready empress?

Miranda: Yes my love.

(They kiss. Mid kiss they disappear. Cut to Ariana finishing her song with a long run. Just as she ends Jahshua and Miranda appear on stage kissing in posh couture. Ariana says goodnight to the crowd.)

Ariana: The emperor and empress everyone. (The crowd cheers. Ariana puts the mic on a stand, center stage.)

(Jahshua and Miranda cease kissing. Miranda walks to the mic and speaks into it. Jahshua manifests his guitar around his shoulder.)

Miranda: Ariana Grande everybody! (The crowd cheers.)

(Ariana curtseys and disappears. Miranda continues.)

Miranda: These are The High Warlocks! Awe at their awesome power!

(Phoenix tears out a bold bass line. A song begins. Miranda jumps into the crowd to surf.)

End

253

Ariana and Jennette are back in the hot tub at Rosewood Tuckers drinking daiquiris.

Jennette: How was your show Ari?

Ariana: It wasn’t my show. They attract a fun crowd though, so I like to sing for them. It just feels good to be out there.

Jennette: So you don’t get paid?

Ariana: Of course I get paid. I get paid with Jinnidom.

Jennette: What’s that?

Ariana: Djinndom is the birthright of genii. It is access to the emperor’s power.

Jennette: So you don’t get paid?

Ariana: Money is just paper honey.

(Ariana manifests two large wads of cash.)

Ariana: But djinndom is infinite wealth.

Jennette: Lucky.

Ariana: That’s just what a human would say.

Jennette: Whatever, let’s go find some boys to play with.

Ariana: K K

(They get out of the jacuzzi.)

End

(Interlude- Screen reads, 4 months later.)

254

In Miami’s, Soho Beach house, club bar lounging on the patio we find Jennette, Ariana, Miranda, and the High Warlocks carrying on. Phoenix sits at the end of the table next to Ariana being filmed by a crew from VH1, as he hosts a countdown for Spring break music hits. He speaks to the camera, the rest all talk and laugh, eating and drinking next to him.

Phoenix: (To Camera.) Welcome back to VH1’s Spring break 20, 20 count down of the 100 hottest tracks of the season. I’m the genii Neon Phoenix, here with The High Warlocks, and a few of the loveliest ladies on the planet. Say hi girls.

Ariana: (To Camera.) Hi!

Jennette: (To Camera.) Hey. What’s up?

Miranda: (To Camera.) Party on spring breakers!

Phoenix: (To Camera.) Yeah, they’re some real sweet hearts. We’re here at Miami’s Soho beach house doing it big for the holiday. Can we show the clip of our parasailing competition?

(Cut to a clip of the entourage racing a pair of speed boats. T’challa drives one boat with Jennette, Ariana, Tom, and Jesse, while Eddie parasails behind them. Phoenix drives the other boat with Jahshua, and Miranda, while Luke parasails behind. In mid air Luke and Eddie shoot each other with paint ball guns. End clip. Cut back to Phoenix at the Soho club bar.)

Phoenix: (To Camera.) As you can see, were having a blast here in sunny Florida while we wait for the show tomorrow night at the Klipsch Amphitheater at Bayfront park. But enough about us. Let’s get back to the music. Coming in a number thirty eight is Drake featuring Little Wayne with Tan Lines.

Camera Director: Alright Phoenix, you’ve got a minute or so.

Phoenix: (To Ariana and Jennette.) Take a shot with me girls.

Jennette: Bring it on, Nancy!

Ariana: Yeah, you ain’t sayin nothing!

Miranda: (To Josh.) Can we go somewhere more quiet? I’m not really in the mood to be rowdy.

Jahshua: (To Miranda.) Yes, of course. (To T’challa, and Jesse.) If they ask where we went, just tell them we went to take a walk on the beach.

T’challa: Alright, remember we’re meeting at the mansion club tonight at 10:30.

Jesse: Yeah, tell all the hotties you see.

(Jahshua rolls his eyes. Miranda and Jahshua disappear. The waiter sets down shots in front of the rest of them. They count down.)

Jennette: One.

Ariana: Two.

Phoenix: Three.

(They all drink unanimously.)

End

255

Jahshua and Miranda are found at the Zoological Wildlife foundation in Miami. They are being prepared to handle lemurs, by Megan the tour guide, who has one of the lemurs on her shoulder and another in her arms.

Megan: Just stay calm and don’t make any abrupt movements, or antagonize them in anyway, and you’ll be good. (She hands one of the lemurs to Miranda.)

Miranda: How often do you bathe them. He feels so soft and clean.

Megan: Every night they get baths.

Jahshua: Yeah, we don’t want any stinky lemurs Miranda.

Miranda: (Shakes her head.) So anyway Megan, has this one eaten yet?

Megan: You can feed him if you want. Its almost his lunch time. I’ll get you a bowl of fruit. (Megan goes to the refrigerator to get the food.)

Jahshua: (To Miranda.) I think he’s got a crush on you Miranda.

(The lemur cuddles her in her lap.)

Miranda: Well, he’s friendly. That’s for sure.

(Megan returns with the fruit bowl, and gives it to Miranda.)

Miranda: Thanks. (Miranda begins feeding the lemur.

Jahshua: (To Megan.) Can we see the baby tiger after this?

Megan: Sure, let’s just make sure Leroy here is fed, and we can go right over there.

(The lemur takes the fruit as Miranda gives it to him, and eats it. Cut to Miranda and Jahshua playing with a baby tiger in its habitat. Miranda sits on the ground petting him. Jahshua and Megan stand behind her talking.)

Jahshua: (To Megan.) I used to have a tiger, a long time ago.

Megan: Did you? Where did you get it?

Jahshua: I caught it in Mongolia, and kept for my first mistress in the Caribbean.

Megan: How long did you have it?

Jahshua: I caught him when he was a new born cub, and he lived for thirty three years.

Megan: That’s a pretty long time for a tiger.

Jahshua: I took really good care of it. He ate almost as good as I did, and I would race him around our island everyday.

Megan: What was his name?

Jahshua: She called him, Raaz.

Miranda: Can I have a tiger Josh?

Jahshua: You can have a whole zoo if you wish it empress.

Miranda: O that sounds good, but let’s start with the tiger.

Jahshua: Do you want that one?

Miranda: No, I don’t want to have to carry him around for the rest of the tour. When we get to the castle I’ll have you put a habitat in.

Jahshua: That’s fine with me mistress.

End

256

Miranda and Jahshua walk down Miami beach as the sun sets in the west. She in a bikini with a lacy coverup. He in a black sarong with braids. She leans into him clutched to his arm as they wade in the shallows of the Atlantic.

Miranda: Josh, where do you see us in twenty years?

Jahshua: Where ever you want to be Miranda, doing whatever it is that please you most.

Miranda: Do you think the world will be much different by then?

Jahshua: For you especially, yes. It will be much more modern and by then you will be very used to your eminence. So I expect you will be much more demanding, and menacing.

Miranda: Explain to me my empire Jahshua. I’m still unclear on the power I have.

Jahshua: Yes mistress. I think now you only see the novelty of having a genii, and not just a genii, but the incontestable. There is no force greater than I, and you have full sway over me. Though, I hope you will savor each and every favor I provide, I know that you will surely use me as you please. By that time empress, you will have many castles, and your empire will be very advanced. Furthermore, your influence over the earth will be prevalent. You will sit upon lavish thrones in exquisite jewels, within great majesty. I think you will become quite magisterial.

Miranda: Is that what you want Josh?

Jahshua: I’m not worried about the future Miranda. I only concern myself with the present. I have set out to give you an unsurpassed experience, and I am completely dedicated to your happiness in each and every moment, but I do not anticipate your desires. I only try to inspire them. When you are fully pleased with the moment, I have performed my task perfectly.

Miranda: So since I have no wishes, you are content?

Jahshua: I am not content until I have fulfilled every one of your wishes.

Miranda: So at the moment you are what?

Jahshua: I am happy to wait on you, very happy indeed in the intimacy of our relationship, and until you have a wish I am content. However, when you make a wish, I am once again anxious until you are well pleased. This moment thus finds me elated to be considered a desirable companion, rather than a genii only.

Miranda: You are very warm and inviting. Also, enlightening and knowledgable.

Jahshua: Thank you empress, and you are very soft and soothing as a wife.

Miranda: It’s not difficult Josh, when you are so convenient.

Jahshua: Speaking of which, it’s getting dark and we should start getting ready for the club tonight. I have a whole wardrobe of clothes for you to pick from, and it could take some time for you to decide on what you want to wear.

(Miranda kisses his cheek.)

Miranda: Yes, Josh. I agree, whenever you’re ready…

(Jahshua kisses Miranda’s head. They disappear.)

End

257

Jahshua and Miranda appear in the penthouse suite at the Biltmore hotel in Miami dressed in their beachwear. Ariana, Jennette and the Warlocks are in the middle of a pillow fight. Jennette is latched to Phoenix’s back, and swinging her pillow over her head while screaming a maddened war cry. Ariana is on top of the bed whomping T’challa, Eddie and Jesse. While Luke and Tom chase down Phoenix who charges Josh and Miranda as soon as they appear. Miranda becomes frightened. She and Jahshua disappear just as Phoenix makes a vicious swing. He misses. Luke and Tom are just about to give Phoenix and Jennette a crushing blow, but Jennette disappears, and Phoenix gets the full contact. Phoenix flies through the wall, making a great hole. Jahshua appears behind Tom and Luke with an extra large pillow and sends them both through the wall after Phoenix. Jennette turns and runs to Eddie, jumping on his back. Eddie tries to shake her off by turning in circles, and flings her onto the bed at Ariana’s feet. While he is distracted Ariana thumps him across the room. Jahshua disappears and reappears with two clones that knocks T’challa and Jesse through the window and onto the fairway of the golf course, shattering the window. Ariana leaps from the bed, and soars across the room to give Josh a skull crushing blow, but Josh with a snap turns her pillow into thin air. So he catches her, and sets her down. His clones disappear. Jennette leaps on to Ariana, and begins tickling her. Ariana falls to the ground laughing.

Ariana: (Laughing.) No stop, stop Jennette. I’m gonna pee myself. Dang it! Why aren’t you going away?

Jahshua: Cause that’s what you get trying to smother me in the dome.

(Miranda finds her way to Josh’s side.)

Miranda: Yeah, I almost just got destroyed by those two brutes.

Ariana: Okay, okay, make her stop before I pee on myself!

Jennette: Yeah, I got you right where I want you girlfriend.

Miranda: (To Josh.) Why doesn’t she do something?

Jahshua: Because I’ve taken her power away.

Jennette: O yeah, take some of this… And this… And some of that…

Ariana: No! No! Ahh! Stop! Stop! Please!

Miranda: God Josh, take it easy, she’s turning purple.

(Ariana disappears. Jennette is confused.)

Jennette: Aww man…

(Ariana reappears behind Jennette.)

Ariana: Aww man is right!

(Jennette turns around to find Ariana standing over her. Ariana tackles Jennette and pins her to the ground on her belly. Sitting on her butt so she can’t get up, Ariana tickles Jennette mercilessly. Jennette wails in agony.)

Ariana: O no? Not so fun now is it blondie?

Jennette: (Laughing to the point of near suffocation.) No, quit it Ari! Stop! Please! Ahh! No! For real! My bladder is going to burst! Stop, please! Josh, make her stop!

Jahshua: (To Miranda.) What do you think empress?

(Miranda whispers to Josh. Josh snickers and snaps. Ariana and Jennette both turn into monkeys. Phoenix, Luke, Tom, and Eddie gather behind Josh and Miranda. Jesse, and T’challa soon after. The gibbon monkeys run around howling and waving their arms in outrage.)

Phoenix: I don’t think they liked that very much.

Jahshua: Look G, we came here to get ready for tonight, and not gonna have you guys crushing my empress’s face with pillows alright.

(The whole band looks guilty and bashful, making excuses under their breath.)

Jahshua: As for these two. (He snaps.)

(Jennette and Ariana turn back into their normal selves, hollering and stamping about in outrage.)

Ariana: Josh I’m sorry, I’ll behave. Please, I don’t want to be a monkey… Oh.

Jennette: You better change me back right this second Josh, or I swear I’m gonna…

Jahshua: You’re gonna what?

Jennette: …. Uhh… Umm… find a tree to climb?

Jahshua: Yeah, that’s what I thought, but no need. I just needed you guys to calm down so Miranda could start getting ready with you guys harassing her.

Miranda: Or trying to decapitate me with soft feathery cushions.

(All but Jennette look guilty, staring down at their feet and latently kicking the air.)

Jennette: Whatever, you don’t see me being all timid, just cause we were fighting with some genii.

Ariana: Yeah, cause you knew we would take it easy on you. He didn’t know we weren’t using our full strength.

Jennette: Like we would ever hurt Miranda on purpose.

Phoenix: Alright, drop it. I’m over that stupid pillow fight anyway.

Miranda: Yeah, cause you lost.

Phoenix: Hey now… We were playing with no tricks. If he hadn’t teleported you two, I was gonna put you both out of commission.

Miranda: O, if that’s the case, rematch tomorrow, in a proper arena.

Eddie: Where might that be empress?

Miranda: Tomorrow night, after the show, we’ll have an all hotel free for all kicking off in the hotel lobby. Jennette and I will be referees.

Phoenix: How are you going to know who wins if its the entire hotel?

Miranda: Direct contact sends you back to the suite. I will start the match. Jennette will be in the suite waiting to see who shows up last.

Phoenix: What about indirect contact?

Miranda: The momentum of the pillow has to be completely stopped. If you just get brushed or grazed, or even hit with an unsound blow you’re safe. It has to be a solid, pillow buster of a hit.

Phoenix: Tricks?

Miranda: No humans, tricks are allowed.

Phoenix: Tomorrow night it is. (To Josh.) I’m gonna be out for blood emperor.

Jahshua: Bring it on, wench!

Miranda: Okay, great. Can we see the wardrobe now Josh?

Jahshua: Sure. (He snaps, a rack of clothes appear in the room.)

Miranda: And maybe we should do something about the damage.

(Everyone looks around, making agreeable motions and sounds. Jahshua rolls his eyes, and snaps. The room goes back to perfect condition. Jennette turns to the wardrobe.)

Jennette: O these are beautiful. Can I fit them?

Jahshua: Anything you choose is for you.

(Jahshua and the warlocks take seats on the floor and on the bed to watch the girls change. Ariana goes to look at the rack too.)

Ariana: O, you’re right. I’ve never seen styles like this.

(Ariana snaps and a room divider appears between the females and the warlocks. The females take clothes from the rack behind the screen to change. Montage the three of them taking turns modeling their outfits for the males who cheer them.)

End

258

The entire entourage is at club Mansion in Miami dressed in sexy and stylish wears as the energy begins to surge. Miranda dances with Jahshua. Ariana dances with T’challa. Jennette dances with Phoenix. The rest of the warlocks have found sexy women to dance with in the club. Jennette and Phoenix dance over to Miranda and Josh who are dancing very close and face to face so that they are can kiss every so often. Phoenix dances behind Jennette as they approach.

Phoenix: (Loudly over the noise to Jahshua.) Follow us if you guys want to smoke!

(Phoenix and Jennette dance away into the crowd. Jahshua inquires of Miranda with a subtle gesture. She signals to follow them. She turns, and leads Jahshua who holds her by the waist. Phoenix is seen speaking to T’challa and Ariana. They follow him as he walks away. Cut to the whole group walking out of the club. They walk down the street toward the beach with their new friends. The warlocks all have a woman under their arm as they walk. Jesse with a woman under each of his arms. Phoenix manifests a big, thick, smoking, cigar like blunt, and takes a long drag of it before passing it around. They all walk talking to their companions. Jahshua and Miranda lead the way to the beach. Cut to the beach, in the dead of night. Phoenix and Jahshua are sat down next to each other with Jennette and Miranda on either side of them. The others play freeze tag along the water. Jahshua, Phoenix, Miranda and Jennette talk while smoking the half of the blunt that remains.)

Miranda: (To Phoenix.) So what are you and the others going to do when the tour is over?

Phoenix: (Smoking.) What every genii does in their free time probably.

Miranda: And what would that be.

Phoenix: Pray.

Miranda: And after that?

Phoenix: Whatever task God presents.

Miranda: And you don’t know what that is yet?

Phoenix: Me personally? I’m gonna find me a new wife now I’m going to be single.

Jennette: O yeah? How would you feel about taking me somewhere nice?

Phoenix: Where would you want to go?

Jennette: I don’t know. (To Josh and Miranda.) What do you guys think?

Miranda: Lisbon.

Jahshua: Cairo. Barcelona. Paris. Geneva. Rio.

Jennette: What do you think Phoenix? Wanna take me?

Phoenix: To all of them?

Jennette: Why not?

Phoenix: We’ll see how you feel when the time comes. I might be a genii, but I don’t have my heart back yet. You might not even like me by the end.

Jennette: Then I’ll have Ari take me.

Miranda: Or you can always come with Josh and me to Greece like I wanted.

Jahshua: Miranda, I’m not going to marry anybody but you.

Miranda: O yes you are! And you’re going to like it too! I’m not gonna have the whole world on my shoulders alone. Alright?

Jahshua: Well, I’m not granting anyone favors but you empress.

Miranda: Hush now Josh. Phoenix, we’ll be sure to set you up with someone you deserve when this is all over with.

Phoenix: (Passing the blunt to Jahshua.) Thanks empress.

End

259

Backstage at Klipsch amphitheater Phoenix is being filmed for the VH1 countdown again with Ariana, Jennette and the High Warlocks behind him playing hacky sack. Miranda and Jahshua have yet to arrive. Phoenix speaks to the camera.

Phoenix: (To Camera.) VH1! We’ve been counting down your spring break hits all day from beautiful Miami Florida here at the Klipsch amphitheater. We’re preparing for showtime here at Bayfront park. We’re joined by the beautiful ms. Ariana Grande, and always sexy ms. Jennette McCurdy. The emperor and empress Divine have yet to make their entry, still in bed most likely. Regardless, we’re to our last hit of the evening. You know what that means. We’re down to the wire. So stay with us after for a live performance from yours truly, and the rest of the High Warlocks here in Miami beach. All that being said, let’s get to music. Here’s your number one spring break anthem for 2020… Justin Bieber with More Girls than I can Handle. Stay right there, we’ve got a great show for you right after this.

Camera Director: That’ll do it Phoenix, thanks a lot.

Phoenix: (To director.) Happy to do it chief.

Camera Director: (To the camera crew.) That’s a wrap everybody!

(Phoenix manifests a smoking joint and inhales from it. Jennette and Ariana rush him from behind and embrace him playfully.)

Ariana: Finally, we’ve been waiting all day to start annoying you.

Jennette: Yeah Phoenix, its time to party!

Phoenix: You guys are crazy. You couldn’t annoy me even if you tried.

Ariana: O yeah?

Jennette: Is that a challenge?

Phoenix: Just remember that two can play the annoyance game.

Ariana: O its on!

Jennette: Yeah, you asked for it buddy.

(Jahshua and Miranda appear backstage. Miranda rushes to Jennette with news.)

Miranda: Jen, Jen, guess what?

Jennette: What’s up kid?

Miranda: Remember how we were supposed be in Hawaii next week?

Jennette: Yeah.

Miranda: Well, instead of spending two months there, we’re gonna take a cruise there instead.

Jennette: Saweet! Where is the boat?

Miranda: Puerto Vallarta.

Ariana: Are all of us invited?

Miranda: Of course.

Jahshua: (To the band.) It’s time fellas. Let’s do it.

Ariana: Aren’t you gonna wait for me to introduce you?

Jahshua: That’s okay diva. You need to work on your swing for the fight tonight.

Ariana: Please Josh! Yesterday was a fluke. You’re as good as a bug on the sole of my custom designer heels.

(Jahshua rolls his eyes, and kisses Miranda’s head.)

Jahshua: (To Miranda.) See you in a little while babe.

Miranda: Break a leg beau.

Jahshua: (To band.) Here we go. (The High Warlocks all disappear to the stage.)

End

260

In the Biltmore hotel lobby, All of the genii surround Miranda in the center of the room which is clear of all furniture and staff. All of the genii hold large fluffy pillows. Miranda explains the rules of the pillow fight one last time.

Miranda: Alright guys, you know the rules. No pitiful strikes. Solid contact only. Tricks are allowed, and the entire hotel aside from our suite is in bounds. As soon as I disappear the game is on. Last one to our suite wins. Everyone clear?

(All the genii nod in comprehension.)

Ariana: I’ll have your head for my trophy grand daddy!

Jahshua: I’ll make sure to go easy on you princess.

Phoenix: I’m with Ari! Gang up on the emperor!

Jahshua: O, this is gonna be quick.

Miranda: Josh, when I snap, send me back to the room.

(Jahshua winks. Miranda snaps, and disappears. Cut to the suite where Miranda stands in front of Jennette who sits on the bed with a bowl of ice cream.)

Jennette: Want some ice cream?

(A second later. Tom appears behind Miranda flying in mid air into the wall, and falls to the ground. Shortly followed by Luke, Jesse, Eddie, T’challa, and Phoenix all one after