Positive Opportunity

By Steve Ambrose

Snippets of My Life
POSITIVE OPPORTUNITY
I was given a second chance at life
on February 27, 1986. I suffered a concussion
in a young businessmans basketball
league. It turned out that I had a blood
disorder, and when I hit my head, I formed
a blood clot in my brain stem.
This injury affected my coordination
throughout my body, thus affecting
my vision, speech, and locomotion (walking).
I cried for about a year! My parents
didnt know what to do. Finally, I was
enrolled in an out-of-town
rehabilitation center. I was forced
to deal with my disability. In doing
so, I realized that I had a rock-solid
family. Also, my cognitive skills
were intact. In short, I was a mental
giant among the other clients. I
discovered confi dence, patience, and
endurance with these qualities.
Ill have the opportunity to do
something positive.
Stephen M. Ambrose

• Language: English
• Publisher: Xlibris US
• Release date: Nov 14, 2012
• ISBN: 9781479746958

Steve Ambrose

Steve Ambrose is a middle child of five children by Jack and Peggy Ambrose. He is a college graduate from University of Georgia in 1981. Before that, Steve was enrolled in private and prep schools. His vast experiences are derived from a very unique existence. He was disabled back in 1986 and from this has generated a writing style of smooth, descriptive, humorous stories of human nature.

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Copyright © 2012 by Steve Ambrose.

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CONTENTS

Mr. Invincible

Part One

Part Two

Old Spice

The Sarah Palin Shrill

7,900 Miles Of Pure Excitement

Humpty Dumpty

Trying To Be Funny?

Sawing Logs Through The Northeast

The Date And The Fall

Stress

The Joke Heard Around The World

DEDICATION

I would like to thank a number of people. First, my friends and family, who gave me the support and substance to complete this piece. There is also one friend, Willie, who, above all others, has demonstrated to me that life is one big game and it’s how you play it that matters. One tool he uses—and which he has helped me learn to use—that makes the game of life more acceptable is the Internet. In fact, he developed my own website. Hopefully, this site will demonstrate how different my life has become over time. He is my role model, and how I resolve life’s obstacles is determined by how he digests these hurdles.

MR. INVINCIBLE

Part One

I have never composed a sci-fi thriller, but this occurrence was too unusual not to bring to your attention. As mentioned earlier, my attendant and I ride our bikes to church each morning. To do so, I arise early each morning. I shower, eat breakfast, dress, and off to church I go. My lack of physical coordination and balance are so bad that any bit of hectic commotion amplifies those problems.

Going to church in the morning, I have an adversary. The natural obstacle I’m referring to is a simple drainage ditch to the side of my path. I’m aware of it, and so I plan my approach, but this precaution and planning sometimes doesn’t help. I’m still an accident waiting to happen! I tell myself I am so dramatic and that I’m the only person who’d perceive this inanimate object as something like a sci-fi monster. Well, that fear was well-founded.

One morning, even with all my planning, my bike wheel got caught in the grove between the sidewalk and the grass, and I flipped over down into the ditch. One would think that I’d be a brave little soul, but in actuality, I screamed like a little girl! I was within a couple of hundred yards from the church (or nirvana, or rescue); in fact, I saw the church’s steeple from the ditch. Before I navigated my way out of the ditch and its wet, cold black mud, I stopped and gave myself a pep talk. I told myself, I am a good person, I attend church each morning, I don’t drink or smoke, and I’m kind to my fellow man. I will survive the ditch. In short, I am determined. I am invincible! If you remember the old parable of Michael the Archangel (me) versus Satan (the ditch), you know who won. I attempted the corridor of death and survived. It wasn’t even close.

What did I learn from this mishap? It’s simple: wake up, drama queen. Dust yourself off and learn from your battles. This is the real world, so take the car next time, or be ready to run the gauntlet again!

Part Two

My next test of invincibility was skydiving, and surprisingly, it was just OK. One would think that this endeavor would be neat, cool, and exciting, but by the time this event was over, it was just OK. Let me explain.

My attendant and I arose early and drove three hours south of home after only getting a whopping two hours of sleep. I was dead tired! When I get exhausted, the first physical coordination attribute to go is my speech, and my words are hard to understand. That day, whenever I talked to someone, they claimed that they couldn’t understand