From the Heart

By Marilou Rennie

This is a book of poems. Each poem depicts a personal story. Stories witnessed by a Medical Social Worker while working with hospice patients and families. Wondrous stories that need to be shared. Stories that demonstrate hospice as a program that is as much about living as it is about dying. After you read this book, you cant help but be moved by the tremendous strength of individuals and families who are coping with one of lifes greatest fears; death. This book is an attempt to show that while death can be sad, it is more often to do with love.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Xlibris US
• Release date: Sep 27, 2007
• ISBN: 9781477173152

Marilou Rennie

Marilou Rennie, LCSW, has always had an interest in death and dying. It is no surprise then, that she has worked with that population during her entire career as a medical social worker. She has witnessed many remarkable moments while working with families. She writes poetry to document these moments. Each deeply touches her heart, so the poem that ensues comes from the deepest part of her soul. These poems are a tribute to her patients to help keep their stories alive. She lives in Northern California and continues her work with Hospice today.

Book preview

Copyright © 2007 by Marilou Rennie, LCSW.

ISBN:  Hardcover   978-1-4257-8702-8

Softcover   978-1-4257-8676-2

E-book   978-1-4771-7315-2

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the copyright owner.

Names have been changed to protect privacy and confidentiality.

To order additional copies of this book, contact:

Xlibris Corporation

1-888-795-4274

www.Xlibris.com

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CONTENTS

BOOKS

TOOTHPASTE

BETWEEN HER LINES

CROOKED SMILE

GAINING CONTROL

GOODBYE

HEAVEN

ADDICTION

MEMORIES

MY ANGEL

FINAL GAME

ANGER

ONE MORE YEAR

SHE

A TISSUE

TELL ME

THE CRACK IN THE DOOR

A LADY

NATURAL SCIENCE

THE PROTECTOR

HER DAD

QUIETLY

THE SECRET

SHE LEFT US

HIS LAST BREATH

TO FIND THE WORDS

SHE LOVES HIM

MORE THAN WHOLE

MYRA

THE TEACHER

THE OBITUARY

CONNECTED

THE RING

HER LITTLE BIRD

TO MOVE ON

UNSPEAKABLE PAIN

SO HE IS

TO LET GO

THE TRAIL

I’M YOUR DAUGHTER, LINDA

FOR YOU

SEASHELL

FOUR FLOORS DOWN

TOO SLOW

A FINAL NUDGE

THE CALL

DO YOU KNOW?

SAM KNOWS

MONEY VS. LOVE

ANOTHER NORMAL DAY

ONE LAST REQUEST

AMAZING GRACE

SEVENTY-TWO YEARS

A FEW MINUTES

THREE WORDS

CONTROL

WAITING AROUND

ONE HOUR

CONVINCE ME

BE A MAN

THANK YOU

Dedicated to hospice patients and families everywhere.

Without them, there would be no stories.

ONE READER’S STATEMENT

These poems create a picture of the end of a human journey. Each ending is as unique as every life. The compassion, insightfulness and sometimes humor that is expressed in each poem is truly remarkable. This book has captured glimpses of the human condition and spirit at a difficult time. Marie Warner

ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

This book would never have come to completion without the help from my family, friends and co-workers. Their continual support is what kept me going during this process. I wish to thank my family Bob, Mike, April and Mark Rennie for their unconditional support. I also could not have done this without the help of Beulah Warner who, along with my family, read and reread each page without complaint. In addition, I would like to thank my friend Judy Johnson. Her gentle insistence about hearing the story behind ever poem was invaluable. Because of her insightful persistance, a story accompanies every poem.

BOOKS

During my career as a Medical Social Worker, I have met many people. Everyone has a story to share. Each of us are unique and dependent upon each other to survive, so everyone’s story is important. No matter how short or how long a story, all of our lives are intertwined. The stories that are in these pages are extraordinary tales about ordinary people like all of us.

BOOKS

Life.

An exclusive best selling novel

full of pages

yielding a wondrous narrative

only one unique individual

could ever detail.

Some books become sagas.

Chapters teeming with character

while others are short stories

with scarce pages to fill.

Some books are left

dormant on the shelf

full of blank pages.

Unfulfilled stories never

to be recounted.

Other books are

read and reread,

over and over.

Covers become faded,

pages curled at the corners,

binding cracked and worn.

A world full of books.

Each distinct

supporting each other.

Volumes to share

until

The End.

TOOTHPASTE

Nancy was a wonderful woman who was suffering from leukemia. She came onto hospice in June, one month before her eighty-second birthday, so she planned a birthday party for herself. She wanted it to be her memorial and so invited everyone she knew. Her plan was to die shortly after the party.

Nancy’s disease progressed very slowly. Each time I visited her she would say, I am sick and tired of being sick and tired. Nancy had been active her entire life and was very impatient with her dependence and the slow decline of her disease. She had moved in with her daughter and had fears that she would overstay her welcome. Her family was very close and devoted to her so the chance of that happening was nil.

Nancy had a wonderful outlook on life. She was very practical and felt it was her time to go. She wanted to just get on with it. In September she bought this large tube of toothpaste and said that it was would be the last tube. This poem is a result of the visit I did in early January after the Christmas holidays. Nancy died three months later. I was honored as the family printed this poem in her memorial.

TOOTHPASTE

She turned eighty-two last summer.

She knew she’d never see eighty-three

so she planned a final birthday party

inviting everyone she knew.

It would be her memorial.

Lots of hugs and goodbyes.

Then they could get on with their lives

and she would be ready to die.

Her disease is progressing slowly.

She’s impatient with the pace.

She just wants it over,

I bought my last tube of toothpaste.

Summer turns to Fall

as her toothpaste tube shrinks down.

Her patience is constantly challenged

as the disease dawdles on.

The tube is almost empty

as the Winter holidays roll around.

If you ask her about her Christmas

she’ll disappointedly reply,

I was given two more tubes of toothpaste.

BETWEEN HER LINES

This poem is about sixty-six year old Ronnie, who was diagnosed with terminal lung cancer two weeks prior to coming onto hospice. Ronnie was so matter of fact and sarcastic. Her sharp wit had everyone laughing. Her family gave it back just as quickly. Their caring could be over-shadowed by