A Song for Hannah

By Eva Fischer-Dixon

When sixteen year old Rachel Schwartz meet a young sailor, Andy Russell, no one would expect, especially her parents that their love-at-first-sight would last. Rachel faithfully waited for his return from his extended submarine duty and a year later, after his return, Andy proposed marriage. Parents on both sides agreed that their children's love for each other was genuine, but Rachel being Jewish and Andy being Catholic seemed like an obstacle that Andy was willing to bridge by converting.
Rachel anxiously waited for Andy's decision about their wedding day that kept getting further, delayed for various reasons, new civilian job, conversion, money issues and then the unbelievable happens, Andy commits the ultimate betrayal. Rachel becomes devastated by the break-up but in an attempt to seek revenge, she seduces one of Andy's brothers and she had to face the unexpected consequences of her action.
After losing faith and trust in men, Rachel concentrates on her career after moving to California. Because of a strange string of events, she travels to Israel where she encounters a man, Yossi, who would give her another chance for happiness, but only if Rachel is able to put the past behind her. While she is trying to make the decision about her future, first she must face a devastating event that she is not sure that she is able to overcome. With the help of Yossi, Rachel puts her life back together and makes the ultimate decision that affects everyone around her.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Xlibris US
• Release date: Jun 5, 2012
• ISBN: 9781477108505

Eva Fischer-Dixon

I came into this troubled world during the early morning hours of June 17, 1950, in the city of Budapest, Hungary. I was the first and last child of my 41-year-old mother and my father who was 45 years old at the time of my birth. As I did not know any better, I could not possibly understand that we were living in poverty, as I was growing up with loving parents and there was always a bite to eat. My childhood was poor and saddened with tragedies. As a six-year-old child I witnessed the bloody 1956 revolution and received the first taste of true prejudice by those of whom I thought liked us, yet turned against my family. That tragedy did not match the untimely death of my beloved father when I was not yet seven years old, on February 14, 1957. My mother remarried in 1959 and our financial situation was upgraded from poverty to poor. After finishing elementary school I made a decision to earn money as soon as possible to ease our financial situation and I enrolled in a two-year business college (high school diploma was not required). I received my Associate Degree in 1966 and I began to work as a 16-year-old certified secretary/bookkeeper. During the same period I began my high-school education, which I completed while working full-time and attending night school. I discovered my love for writing when I was 11 years old after a movie that my childhood friend and I saw in the movie theater. We were not pleased with the ending and Steven suggested that I should write a different ending that we both liked. Voila, a writer was born. With my family’s encouragement, I entered a writing contest given by a youth oriented magazine and to my genuine surprise, I won second price. My desire to live in a free country and to improve my life was so great, that in 1972, leaving everything, including my aging parents behind, I managed to escape from Hungary during a tour to Austria, (then) Yugoslavia and Italy. I spent almost nine long months in a rat infested refugee camp, located Capua, Italy, while I waited for official permission to immigrate to the country of my dreams, to the USA. In 1975 I met and married a wonderful man, my husband Guy. Thanks to his everlasting patience, he assisted me in my task of learning the English language. He is truly my partner for life and I remain forever grateful to him for standing by me in some tough times. It is difficult for me to describe my love for writing. I cannot think of a bigger emotional joy for an author than to see a published novel in somebody’s hand and to see a story come alive on the screen. I yearn to experience that joy.

Book preview

A Song

For Hannah

116417-FISC-layout.pdf

Eva Fischer-Dixon

Copyright © 2012 by Eva Fischer-Dixon.

ISBN:          Softcover                                 978-1-4771-0849-9

                   Ebook                                      978-1-4771-0850-5

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the copyright owner.

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to any actual persons, living or dead, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.

To order additional copies of this book, contact:

Xlibris Corporation

1-888-795-4274

www.Xlibris.com

[e-mail]

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Contents

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

Chapter Five

Chapter Six

Chapter Seven

Chapter Eight

Chapter Nine

Chapter Ten

Chapter Eleven

Chapter Twelve

Chapter Thirteen

Chapter Fourteen

Chapter Fifteen

Chapter Sixteen

Chapter Seventeen

Chapter Eighteen

Chapter Nineteen

Chapter Twenty

Chapter Twenty-One

Chapter Twenty-Two

Chapter Twenty-Three

Chapter Twenty-Four

Chapter Twenty-Five

Chapter Twenty-Six

Chapter Twenty-Seven

Chapter Twenty-Eight

Chapter Twenty-Nine

Chapter Thirty

Chapter Thirty-One

Chapter Thirty-Two

Chapter Thirty-Three

Epilogue

Also available from Eva Fischer-Dixon:

The Third Cloud

A Journey to Destiny

One Last Time

The Discovery

The Forbidden

Fata Morgana

Eighteen

The Chava Diamond Chronicles: The Shades of Love and Hate

The Bestseller

Dedication

I wish to dedicate this book to those whose innocent lives

were taken by terrorists

Chapter One

RACHEL ALWAYS KNEW that her situation while she was growing up was more lay-back than other children born into religious families. It was never easy though, especially if the child or children had a rebellious mind. What if they were not interested in the teaching of the Bible, Torah or the Koran? What if their parents insisted on following what they believed was the right path to salvation?

Luckily for Rachel Schwartz that was not exactly the case. Rachel, who was born into a Jewish family, counted her blessings because her parents were somewhat lenient when it came to enforcing the Sabbath, or attending the Synagogue during the High Holy holidays. Her mother lit candles on Friday nights at sunset without missing a single occasion. She would not do anything other than relax while reading her small prayer book she brought from the old country, until the next sunset on Saturday night. Once the Sabbath was over, without any further delay, she would become busy with her normal everyday routines.

Rachel’s parents were Holocaust survivors who immigrated to the United States from Hungary after World War II. She grew up listening to the stories about the Holocaust, and she had a complete understanding of what her parents had to endure, and what sacrifices they had to make just to give her a good life.

Her mother always tearfully recalled the day when she was separated from her parents after their arrival to Auschwitz—she learned later on that they were marched directly into the gas chambers. Ilana Weiss survived, but her two sisters, one younger and one older than her perished due to illnesses and starvation. She met her husband, Rachel’s father on a train heading back to their native country, after the liberation of the camps, where they were forced to endure immeasurable hardships and cruelty by the Germans. They were married shortly after returning to Hungary. Seeing the lingering dislike and hatred that still surrounded their country’s dramatically reduced in numbers Jewish population, and after a long discussion about leaving the country; they decided to make the United States their home, where they hoped that they could live in freedom and without religious prejudice.

After living in New York and in Boston for a few years, they finally decided to settle down in a village-like atmosphere which they discovered during one of their Sunday outings. Their choice city to live became Mystic, Connecticut. Luckily, George found a job at the Naval Shipyard in Groton, Connecticut, and with their hard-earned savings accumulated by each of them working two, or three jobs at times; they purchased a comfortable-sized home where they hoped to raise a family.

George Schwartz was a survivor of the Mauthausen concentration camp, but unlike his wife, Ilana, he never talked about what he lived through, no matter how much Rachel occasionally pressed him for information. The only detail he ever mentioned of the ordeal to his daughter was that all of his brothers, all four of them, and his parents were murdered in the camp.

Rachel grew up not having Jewish friends, and the only time she would encounter any Jewish youth was when they attended the celebration of the beginning of Yom Kippur at the Synagogue in Hartford, Connecticut. Her family had to travel, although not a far distance, if they wanted to participate in the services as there was no Jewish place of worship located in their vicinity.

Rachel, who was simply not interested in any particular religion, was constantly reminded of the faith of her ancestors, and her parents never let her forget where she belonged. When she was in high school, she became obsessed with learning as much as possible about the Holocaust; she devoured books on that subject, one after another. Her girlfriend, Katie, told her that she was nuts and that she was suffering from an identity crisis. Katie, whose parents attended more country club gatherings than Sunday masses, could not understand Rachel’s sudden interest in what she called a morbid subject.

I just need to know why those atrocities happened and who committed them. At the same time, I would like to know who my ancestors were, Rachel tried to explain to her friend when she called her one late afternoon on their day off from school.

But why does it matter? Katie asked.

Don’t you want to know where you came from? she responded with her own question.

My grandparents were already born in this country, actually right here in Connecticut, and that’s enough for me to know. Come one Rach, as she often called her friend. Let’s go and do something, she nagged her.

Alright, she finally gave in. See you at the Drawbridge?

Great, Katie replied. See you at six.

When they hung up the phone, Rachel looked at her books all piled up next to her desk. She sighed and closed the book in front of her, and then she went downstairs. She found her mother in the kitchen busy with preparing their dinner. Mom, I am going out with Katie, she announced.

Her mother was not fond of Katie at all and Rachel prepared herself for what was about to be said. Just how many times do I have to tell you that I don’t like you to hang around that girl? She has no morals; she goes to bed with all kinds of boys.

Rachel rolled her eyes. Mom, that is so not true. You believe everything you hear. Yes, she is flirting with boys but she doesn’t do anything else. Despite all her mother’s concern, they didn’t hold her back when she wanted to go out. There was a curfew of ten o’clock which she normally was able to stretch out until eleven by claiming a variety of reasons, like heavy traffic, her running out of gas; she had to take a friend home, and so on.

Her father passed retirement age and he was a tired man. He worked most of his, what he called American Life at the shipyard in Groton, and he always said that as soon as Rachel finished high school and college, he would definitely retire. Rachel’s mother suggested hundreds of times that she, too, would get a job of some sort, but George was old-fashioned and he believed that a woman’s place was at her home once the family addition in the form of a child arrived.

They were hoping to have children, or even just one, but their hope began to fade when Ilana failed to get pregnant long after they got married. A year before Rachel’s birth, Ilana was rushed to the hospital with a serious bout of food poisoning. Her attending physician asked her the simple question if she ever had a child? She told the doctor that she couldn’t have any children. After a lengthy examination, the doctor suggested a complete test and it was discovered that with minor corrective surgery, it was a possibility that she might be able to conceive. Ilana was already in her early forties, and to her and George’s surprise, she became pregnant with Rachel.

Ilana and George agreed that they would raise their child with respect to their religion, but would let her decide what she wanted to do. When Rachel reached age thirteen, they asked her if she wanted to have a Bat-Mitzvah. She politely thanked them but expressed no interest to officially be declared a woman by her religion.

Rachel’s parents taught her about personal values they grew up with. Ilana never failed to miss an opportunity to lecture Rachel, in a mild form, so it wouldn’t appear as a lecture to the young girl about the do’s and don’ts of being a young woman. Ilana trusted her daughter, but she was also fully aware of Rachel’s surroundings and the temptation that came from her peers. Rachel did have boyfriends, but she didn’t take any of them seriously. Most of them just tried to have sex with her and when she flatly refused, she was never asked out again.

Her mother often told her that being a virgin was not something to be ashamed about. On the contrary, she should have been proud of the fact that she had upheld her morals and didn’t become everyone’s mattress.

Rachel almost always listened to her mother’s cautious, yet caring words about the different life around her. She loved her parents so much, that the thought that she would do something to make them unhappy, would never cross her mind. Besides, she liked the idea of being different from the girls in her class who openly bragged about their previous night’s activities. Some of them called her names behind her back and even teased her not knowing what she was missing. She ignored them and wouldn’t give in for temptation at the cost of losing her self-respect. Rachel was not in any kind of rush; she had her whole life ahead of her. She wanted to be in love and marry someone who would appreciate her completely.

They spoke Hungarian at home, but both of her parents mastered the English language to a certain level. Rachel always thought that her mother had the sweetest Hungarian accent when she spoke English. Her father had a more matter-of-fact accent; to the point, no fancy play with words. She came late into their lives and while she was not spoiled, as many other only child in other families was under the circumstances, they provided her with a comfortable life.

When her friend, Katie turned sixteen years old, Katie’s parents gave her a brand new automobile. A month later when it was Rachel’s turn to celebrate her birthday, her parents took her to Disney World, Florida. She didn’t complain, but eventually when she mentioned the fact that she was tired and embarrassed of riding the school bus every day, they finally managed to buy her an older model used car. She was delighted. The car meant more freedom for her.

Her father arrived home a few minutes before Rachel was about to leave to meet up with Katie. Where are you going? he asked after kissing her on the cheek.

She is going out with Katie, her mother responded, preventing Rachel from answering.

So? her father said. What’s wrong with that? and he looked at Rachel and winked at her. Her mother looked at both of them and shook her head.

Conspirators, she declared and turned her back to them. It was a little game they always played before Rachel left the house.

C’mon, Mom, don’t be like that. You know that I love you and I would never do anything to hurt you, she said and hugged her mother, and then gave her a big kiss on her rosy cheek.

You come home the same way as you left, you promise? he mother asked her.

Yes, Mama, she promised and after kissing both of her parents, she dashed out the door.

Chapter Two

THE CAR, DESPITE being almost twenty years old, started right up. Rachel had her favorite radio station on and she sang along as she drove toward their usual hangout place at one of Mystic’s ice cream parlors. She smiled as Rachel thought of her mother’s concerns. Ilana was old-fashioned when it came to sex, but basically Rachel didn’t mind that at all. She was only sixteen years-old and while most of her friends had already gone all the way, and they claimed that it was not that big of a deal; she respected her parents’ wishes to wait until she got married. Besides, she thought that it was quite all right.

What was the big rush to have sex with someone who perhaps just wanted her for that one single purpose? Rachel could not see the point to do that. Maybe it was the way her parents raised her, but she wouldn’t have dared to have sex. If she did, Rachel would have taken a chance of getting pregnant and that definitely would have killed her mother. She was fully aware of most of the birth control methods through the sex education programs at her high school, but she was simply not interested. Perhaps Rachel just hadn’t met the right boy yet, she didn’t know for certain; but no matter what, she wanted to wait until the right person came along.

Rachel smiled again when she thought about what her mother had to say about Katie’s sexual behavior. She wouldn’t have dared to tell her mother that Katie was not a virgin for a long time, as she knew for one hundred percent certain that her mother would never, ever let her see Katie again outside school activities. Rachel did not envy Katie for the freedom that her friend enjoyed. She often wondered whether Katie was seeking more attention by giving in to boys’ conquest, than really enjoying sex itself. She never asked her. Rachel had been friends with Katie ever since grade school and she never tried to be judgmental of her friend’s behavior. A few times she asked Katie if she wasn’t afraid that she would get pregnant or catch some kind of disease, but each and every time Katie would whip out condoms from her purse as proof that she practiced safe sex.

Arriving at the ice cream store’s parking lot, Rachel noticed Katie’s brand new Mustang already parked near the entrance. Brave girl, she obviously wasn’t worried about her new car getting scratched, as Rachel’s father would say if he has seen the way and where Katie parked.

Rachel found her friend inside the large ice cream store, which was, as usual, rather crowded. She heard her named called out from the farthest side of the place. Rachel made her way through the three steady lines of customers waiting to be served when she noticed Katie waiving at her direction. She gave Rachel a hug and asked her what she wanted.

I think I want ice cappuccino! Rachel declared. Her friend rolled her eyes.

You always order the same thing. Don’t you want to try something different? she asked.

Rachel shook her head and took her place in one of the lines. What’s new with you? she asked Katie.

She shrugged her shoulders and went on complaining about her parents. Rachel truly felt sorry for Katie because her parents simply did not pay any attention to her as a person. They remembered Katie’s birthdays when they were able to throw a party for her at the country club. As Katie said bitterly, she was surprised that they actually remembered to invite her to her own birthday party.

Rachel patiently listened to her friend’s complaints as they waited in line. Suddenly Katie became quiet and pushed her gently with her elbow. Hey, look at those guys. Aren’t they cute? she said and Rachel followed her friend’s eyes toward a table behind them by the window that faced the parking lot.

Several sailors in their white uniforms were eating great volumes of ice cream from a bowl they shared and they were having a ball. A couple of them were making loud remarks at some of the girls passing by them, but the rest of them were quietly observing the new arrivals.

They’re okay, said Rachel and turned her attention back to the young woman, about her age, who handed her the ice cappuccino Rachel ordered, and the ice cream cone with mocha almond fudge that Katie wanted.

Let’s sit close by them, Katie suggested. Rachel was not entirely happy with that idea.

C’mon Katie, I don’t want to, Rachel objected and she meant it. She was becoming concerned with Katie’s behavior and she thought that perhaps her friend wanted to do something that would enrage her uncaring parents.

Katie didn’t listen to Rachel, pulling her by the hand; she practically dragged Rachel to a table right next to where the sailors were sitting. A whistle followed them to the table and Rachel was even afraid to look toward their direction. Katie laughed heartily and whispered to her. Hey, a couple of them are absolutely gorgeous.

Rachel did not reply, she quietly sipped her ice cappuccino, made with her favorite coffee mocha ice cream, from the large plastic cup and stared toward the direction of the door, wishing that they would leave. Would you girls like to go a movie or something? she heard the voice of a sailor who stepped to their table.

I don’t think so, replied Rachel, barely looking up. She turned to Katie, who was all smiles.

Why not? The sailor insisted leaning forward.

Because we are only sixteen-years old, and it would consider a felony in the eye of law if you tried something, answered Rachel loud enough for the rest of the sailors to hear. Laughter followed her response, but she felt Katie’s feet kicking her under the table. Ouch, she cried out. What did you do that for?

I’ll be glad to join you for a movie, Katie replied and got up from table. Rachel angrily looked at her friend.

Katie, don’t you do it. Don’t you dare to leave me here, she said to her in a threatening voice.

Now you are being my mother, too? Katie hissed at her. This is so wrong, Rachel thought. She couldn’t leave her friend to go with that sailor. What if something bad happens to Katie? She would feel guilty letting her go alone. Rachel hastily got up and followed Katie and the sailor, already walking hand in hand in front of her.

Do you mind if I join you? she heard a pleasant voice behind her. She stopped and turned around. The sailor was tall with blonde hair and blue eyes. He had a beautiful smile.

Look, I don’t want any company, really. I am just worried about my friend, that’s all, she tried to explain.

All right. I promise that I will keep my eyes on my friend too, he said convincingly.

Okay, Rachel agreed after a few moments of hesitation.

They walked next to each other, following Katie and her newly found friend. The movie theater was located less than a half a mile away and they just barely had enough time to reach the beginning of the movie Katie selected. Great, thought Rachel, she just had to select a horror movie. She not only disliked horror movies, she actually hated them. She stopped watching them several years ago after having a horrific nightmare and waking up covered with perspiration.

Inside, the theater was already dark and they lost track of Katie and the sailor. Rachel took an aisle seat. The sailor in her company jokingly asked her if she would mind if he would take the seat next to hers. She replied to him that she didn’t care. He sat down next to her and watched the movie without uttering a single word to her.

Once Rachel’s eyes adjusted to the darkness of the movie theater, she tried to locate Katie and the sailor but she failed to do so. Giving up the visual search, she finally glanced up at the screen. At that very moment, an assailant with a long butcher knife was about to stab the heroine from behind who was busy looking out on the window, unaware of the killer’s presence behind her. Rachel was becoming sick in her stomach; she quickly got up from her seat and rushed outside where she welcomed the cool evening air. She pressed one hand over her mouth and another one on her stomach.

A hand touched her shoulder and she couldn’t help it, she began to throw up right there on the sidewalk. Are you alright? she heard the voice next to her. She vaguely recognized the voice as the sailor’s who accompanied her. She shook her head and embarrassedly turned the other way while she tried to open her purse to get a Kleenex. Don’t go anywhere, said the sailor and dashed off.

Rachel didn’t listen; she wanted to get away from the movie theater as quickly as possible. She began to walk toward the ice cream store and their parked cars. She heard fast footsteps behind her and began to walk even faster. Please, don’t run, she heard the sailor’s voice behind her. Rachel stopped and turned around to