Dead Eye Don and the Missing Piano Tuner: Dani Cartwright's Collection of Tall Tales Short Stories

By Dani Cartwright

According to the UN Environmental Program (unep.org) 150–200 plant, insect, bird, and mammal species become extinct every 24 hours. This means that we will never see them again, so we will never have the time to study them in depth. We will never know if they could have helped cure cancer or many of the other diseases that afflict mankind. They are gone forever.

But what if certain mammal species decided to fight back? This is one in a series of short stories that refer to the Great Animal Push Back. The first is Bodacious the Bear. Here is the story.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Tellwell Talent
• Release date: Aug 5, 2021
• ISBN: 9780228851578

Dani Cartwright

Dani's primary interest has been in piano technology, and he has written articles within this field dealing with business solutions facing private entrepreneurs in difficult economic times. His other interests include camping and hiking, and he has combined these interests into his new fiction book. While the central story is fictional, the story contains lessons that help identify certain basic issues that put man in conflict with the animal kingdom and shows serious flaws in man's stewardship of the earth and its living creatures. Dani hopes you find the book an interesting and humorous read, while at the same time looking forward to a time when there will be true harmony between man and other living creatures. Dani is a member of The Authors Guild.

Book preview

Dead Eye Don and the Missing Piano Tuner

Dani Cartwright’s Collection of Tall Tales Short Stories

Book 1 of the Series

Fictionally located in Jasper National Park, Banff National Park, and Kootenay National Park

Dani Cartwright

Dead Eye Don and the Missing Piano Tuner

Copyright © 2021 by Dani Cartwright

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of the author, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical reviews and certain other non-commercial uses permitted by copyright law.

Tellwell Talent

www.tellwell.ca

ISBN

978-0-2288-5415-9 (Hardcover)

978-0-2288-5156-1 (Paperback)

978-0-2288-5157-8 (eBook)

Inspired by my grandchildren

Table of Contents

Chapter 1 - Dead Eye Don

Chapter 2 - Breakfast at Tiffany’s

Chapter 3 - Octavian Noteworthy

Chapter 4 - Face to Face Meeting with Dead Eye

Chapter 5 - Octavian has the Midnight Munchies

Chapter 6 - Tiffany and Her Daughters

Chapter 7 - Revelations Unfold

Chapter 8 - The Early Years

Chapter 9 - Settlements, Tiffany’s First Flight, and Rescue Plans

Chapter 10 - Showdown

Chapter 1

Dead Eye Don

Fields of Heather glisten

over mountain pastures

Silently extending a kindly gesture

To settle within its bluish hue

Seek protection, seek solace, you few

-Dani Cartwright

The mountains are like flypaper. They attract all sorts of interesting characters. Some are looking for privacy. Others are hiding from someone or something. Many come for the love of nature and literally lose themselves in the beauty of it all.

This is where Dead Eye Don comes in. There are few facts known about Dead Eye, but the rumours are endless. He appeared on the scene 40 years ago with permission from the government to build his cabin on a lease near Jasper National Park. He is 7 feet tall and has absolutely no patience for anyone who asks him if he ever played basketball. Dead Eye is a quiet man attached to that muscular 7-foot frame, with piercing blue eyes, a weathered face, and thick shoulder length blond hair. Although his face is weathered by the elements, he is surprisingly not wrinkled. Possibly because he does not frown or smile - much. When he comes to town, he is cordial and always pays cash (the merchants love him).

Dead Eye has one function in life - well, maybe two. He operates the Bush Lost and Found Company, in fact, that is the name of his website. The website is not fancy, its single page is used solely for the purpose of collecting client information. It asks you to fill out your name and the name of the person you are looking for. You must identify the last location you think they were in and upload a picture of the lost soul. Finally, you leave your contact email because Dead Eye requires one meeting with you face to face after he has reviewed the information and decided to take the case. Dead Eye does not come cheap. He charges $3000/hour, and he expects a hefty down payment. Oh yes, one last thing on a macabre note—the price is the same when he finds who you are looking for - whether dead or alive. The only time the balance of the fee is waived is if he fails in his quest. This has not happened yet in over 3000 cases.

Who calls for Dead Eye Don’s services? Those who have exhausted every other means at their disposal. They have tried a plethora of other avenues. They have used Search and Rescue; they have tried hiring other mountain men with tracking dogs, but nothing has worked. Dead Eye Don’s credentials are impeccable. His first name, Dead Eye, presumably comes from his marksmanship. Rumour has it that he can shoot the wings off a flea a mile away. He can track a groundhog 20 miles through a driving rainstorm right to its burrow. He can catch the scent of a butterfly flying 3 miles away, and he can hear a bee buzzing 6 miles away.

Dead Eye has one obsession - bears. He HATES them. It is rumored that there is not one bear living within a 5-mile circumference of his place. He has made the identification and culling of bears his life’s hobby, even while he is looking for someone. His hobby and his work frequently meld, and Dead Eye is a master of multi-tasking. This has led to another unusual talent of Dead Eye. He speaks Bear. Do not you dare laugh (at least not to his face), and do not even think of calling him Dr. Dolittle. Beareze is an exceedingly difficult language to learn with a lot of B’s in it and few vowels. There are rumors that Dead Eye is from Germanic descent and that he lost his siblings in a bear attack in Europe. That would possibly explain his hobby.

If you ask around town, they will tell you that Dead Eye’s cabin is decorated with all kinds of anatomical parts of his victims. He has bear rugs strewn everywhere. There are black bear rugs, brown and even grizzly. Their heads are mounted on his walls, their claws are used as cutlery, and their paws as shoes. Dead Eye, however, does not limit himself to