Krasivaya

By Ara

Nora a woman is her late 20’s is struggling because of her uncontrolled mental state; her thoughts torment her and she is sailing in the sea of distress. Pain and agony. There is someone who is with her in this journey but she is unable to get a hold of neither the someone nor herself. The story revolves around her challenges coping with her mind’s wilderness, worries of being mislabeled, making choices, and paving a path for herself to thrive with the someone she possesses for good. This is no ‘make it large’ story, it is the “make it right” story.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Ukiyoto
• Release date: Aug 3, 2021
• ISBN: 9781005625177

Book preview

Krasivaya

It's within

Ara

Ukiyoto Publishing

All global publishing rights are held by

Ukiyoto Publishing

Published in 2021

Content Copyright © Ara

All rights reserved.

No part of this publication may be reproduced, transmitted, or stored in a retrieval system, in any form by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise, without the prior permission of the publisher.

The moral rights of the author have been asserted.

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, places, events, locales, and incidents are either the products of the author’s imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.

This book is sold subject to the condition that it shall not by way of trade or otherwise, be lent, resold, hired out or otherwise circulated, without the publisher’s prior consent, in any form of binding or cover other than that in which it is published.

Dedication

Dedicated to my beloved grandmother (Nani) – Your love was so unconditional... you stay in my heart forever.

"Out of the night that covers me,

Black as the Pit from pole to pole,

I thank whatever gods may be

for my unconquerable soul"

---- William Ernest Henley

A Dream To Fear

Atragically dark room, where a girl's cry and an exhaust creaking weaken the silence in it, a gigantic shadow grew closer and closer to grab the terrified girl who screams of agony in a desperate call for help lying lifeless in a pool of blood dripping through her veins uncut.

Waking up in jolt without a moment to lose the vision of her nightmare she was sweating, again I woke her up before the shadow in it could … Uhm! We both exactly don’t know what it would do but while she is scared with the sight of drowning in the red pool, I weaken with the thought of the shadow enveloping her with an unknown pain. The traces of the night trial that remains in her memory pushes her into a pond of deep thoughts, I try pulling her out of it while morning brew greets her lips delivering the feedback to all her senses. She silently sat down with one of her old journals and re-read through some pages through, This thing sucks! Honestly, that ridiculously pretty bunch of perfectly bound paper has tears written all over more than anything, I had always wanted her to write well but the reflections were dark in her mind. My insistence has only made her stop writing but it does hurt while she flips those agonized papers, clinging onto her pain-smothered thoughts, makes her fear, even more, domineer and why? - why does she even choose the journey that feels like every day is a walk on the bed of nails when someone as awesome as me is around, hearing me out she drives her way out of the Painsville and starts caffeinating her soul with a smile. I like that smile; it always jazzes up Nora but for her, it values down to just a mere step one of putting up her tough mask for the day. So much for saving her from the nightmares, but I am determined that she will one day realize the very place I come in my constant attempt to be her reinforcer for good and I won’t give up so easily. To just change the mood of these intense conversations I keep having with her almost every day with no one else around to get into it, who can aid this continuum of talks to a right conclusion the easy distraction for her is asking what she plans to wear, so today is no different and I keep hoping it to be something in red, I love that color as much as she does but the silhouette of the fear pulls her down and it is never worn. You know red makes you glow! I said, while she placed a velvety maroon top on her and looked at herself with a blank eye like she saw nobody in the mirror and taking deepest of all the breath she ever took she replied, maybe some other day. Though the twinge is felt deep inside I smiled because like they say there is always a tomorrow.

Well! After the not so long shower, she started getting ready for work. There is this rule she follows like forever now– ‘No matter how you feel Get up! Dress up! Show up! and Never Give up!’ and Nora has never broken that one. That’s the thing about life whatever shit happens, the show must go on, isn’t it? Looking at herself in a solid blue wrap dress that perfectly complimented her, she felt better now while sitting in front of the dressing unit she plans to go ahead with the rest of her regime. Her eyes are outlined with an intense blue and lips colored in wine, she looked at herself with a smile, followed it up a few more in a few different ways and only once the phone alarm beeped in the reminder of time she started for work. On the way she grabbed another cup of caffeine, the magic this drink does is the only fix one needs to shrug off the miseries of half-awake mornings. With some random thoughts and an over-enthusiastic RJ entertaining the city’s morning Nora was stuck in a jam and all at once the visions of the night comes alive in her mind, while she overthinks and fixates on it deep down, I see how easy it was for her to fall prey to her mind and obsess on a despairingly disturbing unrealistic scenes flash, where she had so much to work on realistic ones.

(2)

The office was a place where Nora could forget all the mayhem of her mind diving into that pool of number to analyze but today, she was unable to get her head straight as some unspoken discontent and sadness lingered over again and again creeping out of the darkest places in her mind and it got more difficult for me to hold onto her but for us to work out wasn’t an easy affair, this relationship needed efforts. Nora was constantly tapping her pen restlessly on the desk clouded by an unintelligible fear, fear is a strange feeling to share a room with, it is to be blamed for making a person scared, restless, and insecure but at the same time, it’s fear that awakens the courage to break the door open, take over the steering of life and drive where the heck one wants to because even if life seems unfair game, you are the obvious winner because you own it, you are in charge. Nora was struggling to take over the steering and I really needed her to do so. Driving to a good place or just parking into the darkness is the choice to be made, but that is easier said than done because every game has the triggers that take you down but then also have the ones that take