Namaste Witchy: Magic and Mayhem Universe

By Rose Pressey

Piper Perdue is a witch on a mission. She thinks her magic spa and resort can help every broken and misguided paranormal soul within a hundred mile radius. One yoga corpse pose at a time. Piper believes her healthy living lifestyle can heal any vampire's chipped fangs or witch's broken broom. Sure some of the spa guests secretly wish she'd choke on a granola bar or trip on her yoga mat, but she has their best interests at heart. When Deedee Short comes all the way from Assjacket, West Virginia to mend her broken heart at Piper's "Get Over Your Ex" workshop, strange happenings start immediately. Piper thinks the shady shenanigans might have something to do with the handsome mystery man who appears unannounced wanting to book a stay at the spa for the weekend. Is he a witch, a shifter, or a vampire? Piper can't get a straight answer. She'll have to get to the bottom of this before her serene retreat becomes a not so zen chaotic paranormal battlefield. 

• Language: English
• Publisher: Rose Pressey
• Release date: Jun 21, 2021
• ISBN: 9798201689506

Book preview

Chapter One

Welcome to Paradise Spa and Retreat. Orientation is at five a.m. tomorrow morning outside by the gazebo. I held the clipboard in front of me, checking the list of names.

Someone in the room coughed and another groaned. They obviously were voicing their distain at my announcement of the wake-up time in the morning. Or as I heard one of the women put it, the butt crack of dawn. My guests should have known that at a retreat we’d get up with the sunrise.

Why would anyone want to miss that majestic sight? Shades of pink, red, and purple as it streaked across the vast blue backdrop. Every new day was a miracle that needed to be embraced. Okay, sometimes I had to force myself out of bed at that hour, but it was totally worth it when I saw that bright yellow globe peek over the horizon.

I knew that the wakeup call was early, but I adamantly felt that it was important we were up with the sunrise. The purpose of the wellness workshop was for a fresh start. A new beginning just like the new beginning with each day. Therefore, I felt that seeing the sunrise was part of that process. Witnessing the daily miracle helped restart the mind and served as a reminder that each day was a chance to be everything that they’d always dreamt of.

I told myself that with the current group of retreat attendees that I wouldn’t allow myself to get sucked into their drama. Yes, they came here to my little part of paradise and brought their drama with them. Not just any drama either. Paranormal drama. That took it to a whole new level of crazy. They dragged around much more baggage than a simple overnight bag or rolling luggage. When they opened their suitcases, all kinds of skeletons popped out. And I didn’t just mean that figuratively.

The tall blonde at the back of the room raised her hand. Will breakfast be served first? Will there be meat?

If my memory served me, Mandy was her name. She was a vampire. I hated to be the barer of more bad news, but breakfast wouldn’t come until after morning yoga class. It was better for the body to do the poses while on an empty stomach. I realized that might be tough at first, but they’d get used to it after a couple days. That gnawing feeling in the stomach only lasted for an hour and then it just segued into lightheadedness. It helped cleanse the body. They’d be fine.

Breakfast will follow yoga. We’ll meet in the dining hall right after class, I said with a smile, hoping they wouldn’t throw their chakra beads at me. I think you’ll find everything you need on the menu.

Mandy stared at me with her mouth gaping as if she couldn’t believe what she’d heard. I tried to smile again hoping she would catch on to my positive vibe. The frown on her face let me know it wasn’t working. So, I figured I should just move on and discuss something else. She thought otherwise.

How can we do exercise with no fuel? Mandy placed her hands on her slender hips.

It’s part of the process here at the retreat.

She groaned. Well, what food is served?

Oh, we have tons of options. You’ll love the food here. Our chef Peter is top notch. I touched my fingers to my lips and kissed the tips.

What exactly will we be having though? The bald man at the back of the room asked with a hint of skepticism.

I thought I remembered his name from meeting him when he signed up the other day. Billy, Curt, Seth? Okay, maybe I didn’t remember. Though I thought I remembered that he said he was a werewolf. The only information I had on my guests were paranormal status, names, addresses, and payment info. As far as why they’d signed up for the Get Over Your Ex Workshop, I had no idea their stories. It wasn’t my business to know. All I needed to do was help them discover their true selves so they could see their worth and move on from a relationship that clearly wasn’t meant to be.

The chef makes a delicious chia seed pudding, I said.

Seth grimaced. Sounds delicious.

I remembered his name now. What did he think he was getting here? A juicy hamburger and fries? Maybe a chocolate milkshake to wash it all down with? My stomach rumbled as if on cue.

Well, I guarantee you’ll feel great when you leave here. Your body will be cleansed. My voice rose with each word. I flexed my bicep. Sure, it wasn’t big, but at least it was toned from the yoga and Pilates classes.

I tended to get a little excited when I thought about the rejuvenated feeling that people experienced when they left the spa. Receiving letters from people telling me how great they felt always made my day.

An auburn-haired woman at the back of the room raised her hand. I have a question.

Cindy from Shreveport. She was a shifter. A cat? A bunny? I couldn’t remember which.

Yes? I pointed toward her.

Before Cindy spoke, something cut off her question. In the distance the sound of a ringing phone sliced through the silence like an irritating saw blade whirring. Apparently, someone hadn’t gotten the memo. All phones were to be left at the door upon arrival at the retreat. My assistant had clearly missed one of them.

It wasn’t that I had anything against staying in touch with the outside world, but if my guests truly wanted to clear their minds and start over, then they had to focus their full attention on the program. The phone rang again and then an irritated sounding voice drifted from the hallway into the room.

Excuse me. I’ll be right back, I said with a forced smile as I headed for the main hall.

My footsteps echoed against the old hardwood floor as I walked across the room. The woman’s voice grew louder by the second. As I stepped out into the hallway, her talking drowned out the sound of my footsteps.

A petite brunette held the phone up to her ear. I can’t talk right now. I told you it was over.

Sunshine streamed through the windows of the front doors, bathing the space in a warm yellow glow. A peaceful and serene light that flowed through the room, but that was disturbed by her obvious agitation. Her tension caused a strained vibration to run through the room. The woman had no idea that I’d stepped up close behind her.

Excuse me, I said.

She continued talking, still clueless that I stood behind her.

I’m at the retreat. What do you mean? It is a legitimate place, she said defensively.

What was that supposed to mean? As if my place wasn’t legitimate? I cleared my throat to announce my presence and remind her to get off the phone. She hadn’t noticed me. Or she was just ignoring me.

Excuse me, I said, louder this time.

She spun around and her eyes widened. The owner is here. I’ll let you speak with her directly.

Chapter Two

What in the world was going on here? Along with being angry, her voice had been shaky too. Clearly, she was intimidated by this person on the phone. I’d get to the bottom of this. I took the phone from her and held it to my ear.

"My name is Piper